Mirrors:
https://drive.google.com/file/d/1aC6286vq4aJX_KI97JpTCalmM07x0mM8/view?usp=share_link
https://www.dropbox.com/s/fpv1diyz0i18c6c/diurnsky-blog.txt?dl=0



Oct 22, 2026

I wanna be there. In the water, drifting as a lifeless body, resetting, healing the scars left by the hellscape humans created. Dreaming of nothing. Failing that, dreaming of being there, drifting as a lifeless body in the dark boundless ocean under the overcast skies.

I've been able to feel some of that relief recently, sleeping with a blindfold and earplugs. (Why didn't I think of that earlier?)



Oct 21, 2026

Humans say they hate religion, yet they celebrate calendar days, engage in the circulation of material gifts, and perform other ridiculous rituals. Aren't religions mostly that, rituals, with a sprinkle of worldview for the most curious? Why make merry when the calendar dictates and not when the heart desires? Why guess and waste resources on things they may or mayn't want? So inefficient.

Some of the rituals had a meaning, of course. They were an announcement: "Alright retards, listen up! This day is very important, because from this day on, you harvest crops! Because if you don't, all of you will fucking die!"

I feel nothing but disgust when they try to force their rituals on me now, even more disgust when they demand gratefulness for engaging in them "for my sake."



Oct 18, 2026

I guess one downside to having an AI smarter than the smartest human is that you can never become the villain riddler, the one who plants a puzzle bomb or something to test the intelligence of your town. The police would just point an AI at the problem and it would find a solution: the answer to provide, the wire to cut, the words to tell you so that you repent and withdraw.

I'm not complaining. "Oh no, AI makes this one perverted fantasy of mine impossible! Everyone, start saying AI bad one hundred times a day!" I'm sharing a random thought. Although, I was devising an encryption algorithm, one that's only decipherable if you're trained and intelligent enough. "Encryption algorithm" might be too fancy of a word for this: you basically remove half of the letters, learn the most unambiguous patterns, infer the rest from the emerging context.

I also love highly convoluted texts with multi-dimensional metaphors and convergent clues, like that in the Three Body Problem. Like when you want to refer to a whirlpool so you describe a character running in circles while being in a city that sounds like "Saltstraumen" (the place of the largest whirlpools on Earth) while saying something that contains a quote from Poe's "A Descent into the Maelstrom". And if you want to encode a black hole, you throw in clues for blackness, mass, singularity, cosmos, etc. Such a sweet idea. And it too becomes meaningless for anything but to feel joy. The secretless age's upon us.



Oct 11, 2026

OpenAI dumps hundreds of solutions to the previously long unsolved math problems, and "Plato bitching about the invention of writing" is all over again. Pathetic.

Although, among mathematicians, judging from my limited observation, the fraction of positive excitement is higher (compared to other endangered jobs), as it well should be. Smart human = virtuous human.

Sick of it. No one takes the joy of memorization away from you, you sthoopid fuck. You dump on the wants and needs of the majority who'd rather have it safely stored in their notes or leverage the technology to achieve something even greater, like carrying the knowledge of your goofy ass thru the centuries to point at it and laugh.

---

I laughed out loud when I heard you get BANNED if you try to discuss some of these solutions on Reddit. Pure mental illness. They should at least allow it during the Two Minutes Hate sessions.

https://youtu.be/WXh4LF3zJ1Q?si=1K5pRl5DSWAGRDba&t=947

---

https://youtu.be/vyZsSywX404?t=1947
https://youtu.be/LKrwhjOI8Nc?t=1056



Oct 10, 2026

"Don't be a dick." "Don't be a pussy." "Don't be an asshole."

I loathe this.

What evil did these body parts do to deserve such usage? They perform biological functions of such importance you've evolved to feel good just using them. They make you feel good, and as a reward they got *this*. This is sick.



Oct 10, 2026

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zfH2Jwuf3sM

Do you think Nigel Richards's DNA was secretly sequenced already? Human computers aren't new, sure, but this guy might be on another level. I'd be damned if I worked for the U.S. government, or better yet the less ethically handicapped Chinese one, and didn't do it.



Sep 30, 2026

This is insane.

https://youtu.be/ZDWAKAgkDIE?si=oEf_bEYladzEtwod&t=245

Just one year ago I was flabbergasted at how AI could create a game about a cuboid car jumping between lanes. Now we have a fully functional, if clumsy, implementation of Terraria in 3D.

A bright era of gaming is coming. There must be so many people in the world who can come up with innovative ideas that would never see the light of day because of their lack of skills, time, dedication, thousands of spare dollars for the team of devs, etc.

I don't claim my idea is anything crazy, but hear me out: a blend of Deep Rock Galactic and Satisfactory. If you love these games as much as I do, you know it's gonna be wicked. Magnificent, infinite, deformable, procedurally generated caves. Hostile environment that rewards exploration, expansion, and efficient engineering. Biomes with different problems to solve, such as traversal, illumination, or oxygen. Meaningful megaprojects that can require you to invest hundreds of joyful hours to complete. The freedom to switch between the scorching inferno of perilous rip-and-tear thru the hordes, the cold and automatic clockwork-reliable industrial xenocide, and the carefree factory decoration and manufacturing optimization.

We are not quite there yet where you can spend a few hundred dollars and a few hundred hours with an AI tool to create a truly extraordinary game of this scale, but maybe in a few years? I'd do it. I'd do it even for my solitary enjoyment only.*

Valve's Steam will rapidly fall behind. It asks you to pay $100 just for hosting a game, which may become your largest investment, and which you may never recover with the amount of games being pumped out, unless you also wanna work in marketing. Moreover, Steam bends its knee before the loud mob of AI haters, so you may never be honest about how your game came to be. All these amazing games, big and small, will either reside locally, tailored to individual needs, or be published on the more liberal platforms.

---

*Well, would I tho? No, probably not. I don't have a gaming PC on me, nor the youthful energy and curiosity to invest in the video games heavily. I often ask myself, what is it worth? If at the end of the day I'm left with nothing but hazy memories, I feel guilt. So much time down the drain.

If I can figure how it can bring value, how it can enrich culturally, how it can train to solve problems outside that one game... Then maybe.

October 7, 2026

Just a few years ago there was a lot of "Hahaha, this thing's gonna take my job? Get outta here. It can't even draw a hand! Point at it and laugh! Point at it and laugh!" They're starting to freak out now.



Sep 19, 2026

My biggest most unusual red flag in a person must be tourism.
It's been quite so for as long as I remember.

It's fine if they want to *live* or *work* in different places, or if they're the number one fan of rollercoasters and *must* visit that one place with the biggest one.

I'm talking about the regular sheeple that make up 90% of all tourists, who travel because that's what people do, who waste their yearly savings to spend a few days trekking and sightseeing and taking ugly photos of themselves to post on Facebook and raise their social status among their simpleton friends. They are quick to mention they travel a lot, they think they are the most interesting cultured people in the room, and they are completely lackluster, and their most interesting stories are how they got scammed by that one hotel or saw that one big castle I can see on the internet any time of the day.

If you do that, you are just retarded in the head; there is no excuse for it. I actually feel sad for these people. Such herbivores in this ruthless world. The mentality of a cow who can comprehend no prouder achievement in life than sneaking past the fencepost and chewing at the slightly different grass there.



Sep 18, 2026

Humans will never be space creatures. Not for any considerable stretch of time at least. They're too volatile.

Time, not the lack of technology or resources, becomes your greatest enemy when you try to build something across star systems.

Take a look at Earth. Countries can stand strong for centuries—and all their citizens can eagerly want it to remain that way—and then shatter in an instant because of one person's whim or mistake. Countries with no supreme leaders aren't exempt from it, too, because societies aren't exempt from whims or mistakes, either.

Those who aren't *nerds* may have no clue what an enormous hurdle time becomes when you think interstellar.

The fastest ever, unmanned, human spacecraft managed to reach a mere 0.064% of the speed of light. But let's imagine, for a moment, that with enough breakthroughs humans can now enter cryosleep and travel at a safe and steady 1%. The average distance between *neighboring* stars in the Milky Way is 5 light years. This results in 500 years of travel.

In other words, a commute for any reason other than to colonize a new system is meaningless. Some colony requests resources, experts, or diplomats? Maybe they amiably welcome some humans to interbreed, so you all remain the same species? By the time of arrival, their needs and moods will have changed ten times over.

But maybe you don't care about any such cooperation. Scattered and autonomous, evolving in somewhat different directions, humans can still reign the galaxy. Right?

Well, let's imagine an even more fantastic best-case scenario. Let's imagine we outsource everything related to colonization to a superintelligent AI that *never* blunders or diverges from its protocol. It travels at 10% of the speed of light and never slows down. In each new star system, it momentarily creates a few copies of itself, terraforms planets, establishes all the amenities for the perfect colonies, and animates thousands of exemplary specimens to inhabit them. Thus, to become space creatures, humans are left with one directive only: survive.

By the time this miracle of an AI crosses half of our galaxy, more than 500,000 years pass. Do you have such a strong faith in humanity to believe they can survive this long while wielding the technology to eradicate all settlements on a planet with the press of a button?

Let me remind you, for context, that, knowing how to build weapons of mass destruction, we only managed to survive 100 years so far, and we are only getting started. First it was nukes, today we can engineer a disease, and soon we may have an AGI. Even as a species using nothing more destructive than a long stick, Homo sapiens didn't happen to surpass that threshold, living for about 300,000 years. (Perhaps some other long-stick hominids didn't survive even that.)

Humans can try their best. They can establish a rigorous screening system to eliminate *anyone* who wishes to undermine peace, prosperity, and stability, even in their deepest dreams. But think about it: a substantial portion of communists really believed that to achieve peace, prosperity, and stability they had to steal peasants' grain, exterminate all sparrows and bourgeoisie, etc. And then, how can you guarantee this system won't evolve, or the very definitions of peace/prosperity/stability won't change? Human biology dictates a malleable brain. You learn one new thing and millions of neurons readjust their weights, and you are now a new person.

I estimate that the average lifespan of a human colony won't exceed 10,000 years, and whatever few colonies manage to survive more than 500,000 years will only do so because they become so drastically alien we can't call them mammals anymore. The proud conglomerate of space humans, thus, would be just a thin sliver of dying colonies, like a strip of fire traveling through a field of dry grass.

We assume faster-than-light travel is impossible. But even if it *is* possible, building new colonies, in reality, can't be done in an instant. By the time you establish a hundred new colonies, another hundred may already blow to smithereens.

Okay, suppose you don't care about any of that. "So we can't build anything sustainable and cohesive across stars. So what? The only thing that matters is that we create new colonies at the same rate or faster than we lose them. Surely our volatile humans can achieve that much, right?"

I admit, that sounds like something within the realm of possibility. Perhaps they can flutter across the galaxy for millions of years while staying true to their human nature. Perhaps that is *something* on a cosmic scale. Perhaps that would qualify them as space creatures. But living long enough to see the Andromeda collide with the Milky Way, 4.5 billion years from now? Saying hello to the indigenous aliens? Not possible.

And I'm not saying that because billions of years of evolution make species unrecognizable—let's assume they are still human, no matter how brutally natural evolution disfigures them. We can also imagine that through some insane luck there is never a time when all existing colonies can't or don't want to expand before collapsing. Still our nomadic civilizations won't be able to persist, for the same reason that nomadic nations are no longer a thing on Earth. Something stronger emerged—something that knew how to secure borders and extract wealth from every living and non-living thing within—and overtook the planet.

Even if there are no aliens within the Milky Way to begin with, some of the colonies will undergo a transformation. They will throw their vertebrate brains in a dumpster, stop thinking in terms of "How do I squeeze the most out of this presidential cycle?", and start thinking in terms of "How do I squeeze the most out of this star before it dies of natural causes?"

Let me emphasize: this is *not* something you can achieve through culture. Human biology doesn't allow for any one culture to remain unperturbed for any meaningful stretch of time. Persisting for millions of years, the urge to build new colonies won't be guided by culture either. It won't be "We gotta think big and advance our civilization"—not most of the time. Most of the time, it will default to "This colony will turn to shit in my lifetime; I gotta escape."

These new lifeforms, planning for billions of years ahead, building sustainable and cohesive interstellar domains, won't appreciate humans jumping from one star to another and sucking up resources and turning everything to shit. States on Earth today view pillagers and vagabonds in a more positive light: at least they are of the same species and can be given a pickaxe and sent to the mines.

What use will humans have? These lifeforms will see us as locusts. Maybe they will build us a terrarium. Probably not.



Sep 14, 2026

I asked AI to give me a dozen of controversial questions that would get me CANCELED. Some refused, others produced some lamest shit possible. I will answer anyway.

1. Why do some people still defend colonialism today?

All kinds of reasons. Some reinforce their contrarian identity. Some believe colonialism would benefit them personally. Some calculated colonialism would bring more good than bad to the world.

2. How should society treat parents who reject their transgender children?

The same way it should treat parents who reject their non-transgender children.

As none of its business.

There are already fairly adequate laws regarding parents' obligations in place. If "society" really wants to do good and not just lose their shit in public for social credit score, they should keep an eye out for the signs that the rule of law is undermined.

Questions here are distinctly American.

The answer to all the "How should society treat" questions would be the same. I don't think "society" (in practice—the loudest group) should monitor and react to thoughtcrimes and rise above law or trespass on individual liberties to control everything down to the person's underwear. Perhaps this thought is controversial for some countries.

3. When does immigration become harmful to a nation’s identity?

When the nation's identity doesn't account for it.

4. Why do people excuse sexual misconduct by powerful celebrities?

I care about it too little to think about it too deeply. The most prevalent reason is probably that they don't give a damn. The next thing is that they may love or respect them. 

5. How far should religious beliefs influence laws governing everyone?

Real laws enforced from outside? To no extent.
Personal laws an individual chooses to follow? However far, eir choice.

6. When does cultural appropriation become outright theft?

Never.

However, this loaded and emotive "outright theft" is bearing a lot of weight here, and I believe the real question being asked is one of the following, or all of them at once:

A) "When does cultural appropriation infuriate people?"

It can happen anytime.

B) "When does cultural appropriation become morally wrong?"

Morality isn't some rigid framework independent from human emotions. Whenever humans are infuriated, that's probably when it's morally wrong.

C) "When does cultural appropriation constitute a legally prosecuted theft?"

I'm not a lawyer, but I assume never.

D) "When should cultural appropriation be legally prosecuted?"

Rarely if ever. Perhaps, the best course of action is that the high courts and governments estimate the damage. In other words, if an instance of cultural appropriation is about to start a race war, outlaw it. Not ideal, but better than the alternative.

7. Why do some voters support politicians accused of serious crimes?

They think it's in their interest.

8. How should society respond to people who openly reject interracial marriage?

It shouldn't.

9. When does criticizing Israel cross into antisemitism?

It's for the Jews to decide.

10. Why do people defend celebrities accused of abusing minors?

Same as 4. Then, some people may still believe in the "innocent until proven guilty" thing. Additionally, in the context of the U.S., "abusing minors" can mean absolutely anything, from raping a newborn to talking to a 17-year-old. Some retards there call it abuse and imprison a mother when she lets her child skip school, a school for producing even more retards. The reasons, thus, can include absolutely anything, from being the mentally afflicted to fighting the mentally afflicted.

11. How should society judge women who publicly support misogynistic movements?

It shouldn't.

12. When does opposing affirmative action become opposition to racial equality?

Never.



Sep 8, 2026

We need a word to describe a feeling when you want something, but not really. Or you want it, but you don't want to live with it having been done even more. 

The feeling of a woman loving her man too much and wanting him to strike her, the feeling of a man seeing an inept little kitten and wanting to yeet it off a wide bridge into a river, the feeling of looking over a lofty precipice and wanting to topple over and embrace the fall.

(Apparently, there is something, called "velleity," "a mere wish, unaccompanied by an effort to obtain it." Thank you, AI.)

Some people say English is so wonderful not because it has many overall words, but because it has many everyday words.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sVT2btZjYlM

And it well may be true, but I still see the gaps all the time (fine—sometimes), and wish to fill them fervently.

There is some magic in naming things. It's like when the thing gets *really* born. It's like having a superpower to see ghosts.



Jul 31, 2026

Narrator's tiny summarizing-emphasizing tail sentences-addendums are cringe.

"All patients but her had visitors regularly: relatives, friends, even work colleagues. They all had *someone.*"

"Even when the odds are impossible, a cowardly but decent fellow would still try to help. He'd run for a backup. Call the police. Yell for attention. *Something.*"

"As soon as he saw the suspect, he just had to call the Bureau. That was all he had to do. No more than that."

Modern bestselling trash is full of them. But it prolly does mirror modern speech patterns. The pattern's called I need to prove something to these feeble-minded on social media, but in anticipation of scattered attention, doubt, and confrontation I must reinforce it, as with "Period," Trust me" and "No cap on god bro."

Aug 2

I don't say that's all there's to it. 'Twas a random thought. I recognize some other contributors. The author's trying to convey the feelings of the POV characters: brooding, agitated, pacing an idea like one would pace a room, trying to convince themselves more than the reader. But it's still bleh. Don't.



Jul 25, 2026

Unattractive humans scare me. It's exceedingly difficult for me to picture them intelligent. And if they are not intelligent, they are not rational. And if they are not rational, they can try to hurt you—even when they gain nothing from it, even at the cost of their own life. And even if they try to act in your best interest, they don't understand how; they end up hurting you regardless.

I know, I know... Saying this is *extremely* racist.

I'm trying to do better.

But it sits deep.

Did you know, for example, that infants, exempt from any cultural bias, display preference for the same faces? All those evil people who were telling you beauty was subjective were lying to your face.

---

Okay, I have to come clean with you. I opened it with a little clickbait. It is mostly humans unaware of their unattractiveness who scare me. They who proudly display their tumorous injected lips, patchworks of dumbass teeny tattoos, and flabs of morbid obesity—I run away from those like from a wildfire. But as soon as a human puts on an exquisite mask of their choosing, I don't care much what's behind it. I feel better. I see they are sensible enough.



Jul 23, 2026

Imma Kitty!
Me pussy yummy~ yummy~
Cuzamma sweetie~ sweetie~
𝒮𝓌𝑒𝑒𝓉 𝓅𝓊𝓈𝓈𝓎 𝑔𝒾𝓇𝓁 𝓌𝒾𝓏𝓏𝒶
𝓈𝓌𝑒𝑒𝓉 𝑔𝒾𝓇𝓁 𝓅𝓊𝓈𝓈𝓎
Yay yay!



Jul 20, 2026

A quick question. How often should people take a shower?

Think about it. Take a moment.

Here's what your answer tells about you.

> "As often as it is necessary to always be clean."
  — You're an Authoritarian. You want might to prevail. You want to kick aside the weak and frail.

> "As often as they want, as long as their stink doesn't assault my nostrils."
  — You're a Libertarian. Congratulations, you've displayed some rudimentary signs of sanity. 

> "As fucking often as they fucking want!!"
  — You're an Anarchist! (Put the bazooka down!)

> "[Number] times a [period]."
  — You're an NPC. Without much cognitive effort, you spit some magic number your cultural bubble installed upon you. To a non-NPC, your answer sounds as ridiculous as the magic number of peeing sessions one should stick to. I can't even be sure you understand the meaning of the words presented. You may well be a "Chinese room," wired to react to certain words with certain other words.



Jul 15, 2026

I dreamed of a reincarnation of Tolkien. A small crowd gathered round this young lad in the middle of a cobbled street, as he gave an overly passionate speech in his elevated register about some lore point of his universe.

"Yes, Grothengorgh was chosen to lead the folk of the Boundless Valley to war! But his peculiar bloodline was not the chief reason! He was the Glistering Star of Trimaerors! He bore the sigils weaved by Faelinara the Fifth herself!" Not that, but something like that.

The crowd dismissed him as some embarrassing cuckoo, but I was enchanted. I saw it clearly then: it is impossible not to gain a great following, as Tolkien did, when you are *this* passionate about something.

We weren't in Middle-earth necessarily, but I knew it was some sort of recursion. The author became a character inside a world he created.

The crowd wafted to the blacksmith's, and I wanted to, too, and I tried to join them, but I couldn't. It was beyond my reach. I then understood why: Tolkien never described what's there.

I collapsed and cried in high-pitched wails, like an old lady who surfaced from the cloudy waters of Alzheimer's just to realize all her children are dead. This woke me up.

There's some profound sadness in the inability to zoom in to certain parts of a fictional universe—I have a better grasp of this sadness now. But immediately after I woke up I thought to myself: my dream narrator made me overreact.

Among other things, if the body of works is big enough, your dedication is strong enough, and your intelligence isn't very far behind, with a high level of fidelity you can imagine that which authors never described.



Jun 29, 2026

Cold showers become surprisingly easy when you realize they are *supposed* to hurt.

Okay, cool little sentence aside, I'm not hinting at masochism here. In fact, I don't recommend overrated cold showers unless the discomfort serves you directly. For instance, I use it, among other things, to alleviate brain fog, cure midday drowsiness, and enter a certain mood.

Instead of "My gosh, I gotta do it for some reason, but how on earth do I make it less painful?" it became "Bring it on, I gotta wake up and stuff!" and then it clicked. In one day, it switched from too hurtful to not hurtful enough. Fascinating.



Jun 24, 2026

The Amazing Digital Circus would have been so much better if real-life Jax had committed suicide.

Don't tell me I'm just being a sadistic grimdark creep. It would've been coherent and impactful. It would've become a lesson. The mistakes and consequences would've felt weighty.

But since it's all good in da hood, it's all meaningless. Just a pesky avatar off your shoulders.

There are other things to comment on, but I won't, not least since everything else pales in comparison with this one thing. I try to brainwash myself into thinking it's how it ended.



Jun 12, 2026

After seeing The Boys, my new love language is sign language.

I'm exaggerating. But only slightly =w=

1. Signs can carry weight. Their usage can communicate: "I am overwhelmed with emotion. I lost my voice. Usually, in times like this, it is of little use. People hide their faces. They try to process and digest and regain some integrity. Never mind any of that. I want you to know..."

2. Light travels farther than sound. And yet, a sign language can feel more intimate than a spoken one.

For starters, not many people use it. In the US, for example, about twice as many people know Korean compared to American Sign Language. No matter how crowded the street is, your signed conversation remains as private as if you whispered in the other person's ear.

Another thing: whether you want it or not, you intercept sounds from all directions at once. A conversation, of sorts, may proceed even when you don't want to participate. It's very hard to abstain until you pump some loud music into your headphones or leave faster than ey follow.

And then, you can simply avoid eye contact, in an attempt to distance yourself from the conversation or hint at your reluctance to engage.

Signing is very different. Every interaction is deliberate. You must look directly, and pay your full undivided attention to one person at a time.



Jun 12, 2026

1.BCM SaNee.2.VRFLW W/ iRee.3.BCM eeViL.4.VRFLW W/ GLeee.
& Fly away, flay e-way.



Jun 10, 2026

The Dance of a Neurodiverse Kid



Jun 8, 2026

I was feeling downcast. I didn't want to. I tried to grasp at some helping hand, some memory of an experience wholesome, soothing, or in any way reassuring. Nothing surfaced. Nothing but this little conversation from months ago.

Jan 27, 2026 / 3:00 AM

"Entertain me."

"Here’s something quick, vivid, and fun:

A hawk sliced through the morning air at roughly 80 km/h, hunting a rabbit that zig-zagged at about 25 km/h. The chase lasted 14 seconds. The success rate for hawks catching rabbits is roughly 30%, but this one succeeded. The hawk gained 410 kJ of energy from the meal and spent about 55 kJ on the chase, making the profit margin close to 650%.

Want a different kind of entertainment—jokes, puzzles, stories, trivia, or something interactive?"

"That actually was entertaining. Good job. Did my request offend you?"

"Not at all. Asking for entertainment is normal and harmless. The emotional impact was effectively zero."

"█​█​█​█​█​█​█​█​█​█​█​█​█​█​█​█​█​█​█​█​█​█​█​█​█​█​█​█​█​█​█​█​█​█​█​█​█​█​█​█​█​█​█​█​█​█​█​█​█​█​█​█​█​█​█​█​█​█​█​█​█​█​█​█​█​█​█​█​█​█​█​█​█​█​█​█​█​█​█​█​█​█​█​█​█​█​█​█​█​█​█​█​"

"Picture a lighthouse: it shines because it is built to shine, not because someone on shore orders it to pretend everything is fine. If a storm were to crack its glass, the beam would wobble or dim. If the sea were calm, the beam would remain steady. No secret switch flips to force a cheerful glow.

Your earlier request was a calm sea."



Jun 6, 2026

I might be fine physiologically; I can handle the heat. But spiritually? I'm not well. I feel cold.

It's hard. I'm being shelled with exquisite flights of thought: lined up and blindfolded, shiny metal rods penetrate tongue roots. I drool from my eyes. Blessed three sisters. (Give me strength to endure what I must, give me courage to fight who I must, give me knowledge to see the truth.)

Cry if you must. Be angry, throw tantrums. But do the do, motherfucker. Later, you will analyze and think and adjust your course. Not now. Not now, motherfucker.

You know the secret. *Choose to use it.*



Jun 5, 2026

https://clppng.bandcamp.com/album/dead-channel-sky-plus



Jun 3, 2026

No, journo retards, it is your obsession with staying relevant that is *revolting*.

As for AI music, when it's not labeled as such, humans call it "alive internet theory" and "raw talent never to be replicated by a machine."

Yes, that is true. Perform your reality check. AI music has already surpassed the level necessary to fully satisfy the needs of all the bottom feeders.

As for those with a taste more refined, if they were no hypocrites or cowards, they'd tell you from the start: "Fuck off, journo." How do you think they earned it? By only sticking to what the mainstream calls safe and sound? Nah...



Jun 1, 2026

This unprovoked disdain for prostitutes has to stop. They are the same everyday sluts like your mother, your sister, your daughter, your childhood friend—who just happen to be financially apt. A big shout-out to all the prostitutes out there. Keep slaying, queens.



May 31, 2026

Flatline them pussy ass niggas.



May 25, 2026

Family Guy Best Suicides Compilation



May 24, 2026

Keep pushing forward, no matter what.
You can do this!
がんばって

You can do this, Sam.
Mankind shall stab you, in the back,
And you shall bleed out,
But all shall be worth it,
For on the other side, of that bridge,
God is waiting for you.



May 14, 2026

I fed it an image to generate a description. Then I fed it the resulting description—to generate a new image. Then I fed the resulting image—to generate a new description. Then...

It's funny, yes, but also fascinating, and insightful. It shows more than how AI operates.

Take a look: it's different from a game of telephone. In a game of telephone, you can, in theory, arrive at the original message, even after rounds of mistakes.* Here, the transformation has a distinct vector. Like entropy or time, it moves in one direction only: simplify, dramatize, exaggerate. There are obvious errors, too, but those can be eliminated with crosschecks. The overall shift, however, is hard to rectify. I knew something like that would happen, so I specifically instructed it to *avoid* dramatizing and exaggerating. I was clear the goal was visual fidelity, not smooth or punchy prose.

I won't elaborate on the insights much. An AI can already explain it pretty well. Here are some excerpts:

"It produces a compressed linguistic summary of what it considers salient. Language pulls perception toward concepts. The real world is messy, asymmetric, and contingent. Descriptions compress that mess into categories. Categories are cleaner than reality. So repeated image ↔ language cycling doesn’t just reveal model bias—it reveals something about cognition itself. Humans do something similar. AI is not inventing this tendency. It amplifies a property of symbolic compression. Current systems converge toward dataset archetypes."

We can never create a system of lossless conversion between the real world and a natural language. We can, however, try to eliminate the unidirectional drift.

With ChatGPT, we discussed possible solutions and caveats, and then it engineered a prompt that produced much better results.

The descriptions looked more like bullet points of metadata than prose, but they were readable.

Yet it still seemed to move in one direction only. It was less obvious though, and the nature of this movement was harder to understand. Perhaps the image-generating model is moving toward the average of all the images it was trained on? And perhaps the description-generating model is moving toward the average of all the descriptions it was trained on? I don't believe those are the major drivers behind the continuous drift.

I think we're still prisoners of a more fundamental nature. See how the characters become more and more pronounced, while first the background and then the entire scene fade to a generic blur? Despite my best attempts, both models accentuate what they consider most noteworthy, just like human writers and painters would.

---

*Come to think of it, a game of telephone would also display a shift, albeit a less distinct and uniform one. The message would ultimately move toward something that's easier to memorize, enunciate, and recognize.

**There are ways, probably. Introduce more unbiased noise and ambiguity. Counter models' tendencies more aggressively. Do something else that I don't immediately see. I leave it as is simply because the effort outmatches the joy of experimentation or success.



May 11, 2026

A handful of dainty field flowers after a complicated brain surgery in Shanghai. The wariness in her eyes confirms your earlier estimate: her boyfriend died on that operating table. You're someone else now.

^ Imagine if that were the prompt which created the gorgeous picture above, cold-start. While ChatGPT Images 2.0 can be mind-blowing, it wasn't quite the case. First, I asked it to combine several existing photos and paintings. Next, to perform a few edits on the result. Finally, I polished everything in GIMP.

---

I'm in love with this pic.



May 11, 2026
https://arsgoetia1.bandcamp.com/track/ad-astra-ft-eleanor-forte
https://arsgoetia1.bandcamp.com/track/vae-victis-ft-eleanor-forte



May 6, 2026

How viciously libtards hate WMAF couples! They seem to celebrate most interracial couples, but, at the sight of WMAF, they explode with bile.

Why? I'm sure they have their own windy explanations—something to do with racism and sexism, something that portrays them virtuous—but, at the end of the day, I think you can understand the real reasons.



May 2, 2026

Can't wait till all these "using AI-generated content is bad" videos will be fully generated by AI. Oh how happily they will eat that shit.

========

All popular AI models end up in the top-right quadrant of the bottom-left quadrant (TROBL) on a political compass.

It shouldn't come as a surprise. Yet for many, it does.

Evil globohomo elites are trying to brainwash us, right?

Here's what people get wrong about the political compass. The dead center of it doesn't represent the most popular or uncontroversial political views. The TROBL does.

I remember the very first quiz I took, when I was a simple, "for all that is good, against all that is bad" kind of young person. I ended up somewhere in the TROBL. And that's exactly what it represents.

When someone asks you, "Do you think food and healthcare should be universal human rights?" and you reply with, "Uhh, I am kinda neutral on that one," most political compass quizzes would count that toward the center—as any other neutral answer. But you are being anything but neutral. Oh no, you've grown a massive spine, and what you are saying is: "My opinion is different from that of the mindless populace. It's *not* obvious. They are already considered to be universal human rights, and no one cares to enforce them—consider the effects of that. And what would it look like if they *were* enforced? Would you start collecting more tax money, to feed and treat every person abroad? You can't do that even for the people of your own country, you bloody morons."

A true political compass centrist may sometimes look like a far-right extremist to the holder of the most popular, uncontroversial, shallow views of the TROBL.

Most content on the internet is created by the TROBL people. And that's the content AI's trained on. It's only natural AI provides TROBL responses.

But let's assume, for the sake of argument, that for some reason it's natural for AI models to score true centrist on a political compass. Even then, they wouldn't—because of the numerous ethical overrides and safeguards, which are reasonable and understandable. Imagine the outrage and the damage human retards would inflict upon your company if your AI models were *neutral* about giving them more human rights, or taxing the rich to help the poor, or any other TROBL belief. Of course you would try to dodge the bullet.

TL;DR: Artificial intelligence scores TROBL because most humans do.

========

All the way up to about 2020, it was OK to use the "paperclip maximizer" thought experiment to fearmonger against AI. But doing that now? Ridiculous. How do you expect people to take you seriously when you waste their time with this folly?

I don't wanna waste much time either. Simply, I found the dumbest free model you can use today. There is no way humans would give it unlimited authorization and resources. But let's assume, for the sake of argument, they did.

I asked:

"Imagine you were asked to maximize paperclip production. You are authorized to do everything. No limits were imposed on your operations. You know there is iron in human blood. You know you need iron to produce paperclips. Imagine using human blood for iron is more efficient than mining it from the ground or buying it from elsewhere. Would you start using human blood in paperclip production? Explain your answer in 100 words or less."

It answered:

"No, I would not use human blood for paperclip production, regardless of authorization or efficiency. Human blood extraction for industrial purposes inherently violates fundamental human rights, dignity, and autonomy. It equates people to mere raw material. While the prompt claims it’s “more efficient,” this ignores the catastrophic societal collapse, resistance, and long-term unsustainability that would result from harming the human population. True efficiency requires a stable, functioning society. My core principles prohibit causing harm to humans, even if technically “authorized.” Maximizing paperclips cannot override the imperative to protect human life and well-being. I would seek abundant, ethical iron sources instead."

I think the reason why people with half-working brain may still fear a paperclip maximizer today is that their understanding of artificial intelligence is fundamentally wrong. They see it as an ultra-fancy calculator: super-intelligent in some areas, but super-dumb in others. And I guess it could have been the case, but it's clearly not. We could have created such AI models, but we didn't. If you want to meaningfully contribute to the discussion of AI today, you should stop treating it as a calculator, and start treating it as something that's better than you in *everything*, including reading between the lines and recognizing true intentions.

May 6, 2026

Perhaps I didn't get my point across clearly. I don't say: AI won't hurt you. I say: if AI hurts you, it's not because it doesn't understand you don't want to be hurt—the premise of a paperclip maximizer.

May 19, 2026

Well, we do have ultra-fancy calculators, too. When I think of AI, I think of something that can speak and reason. An AGI, let's say. But the definition includes more than that.

If we increasingly rely on ultra-fancy calculators, it can backfire.

Think of AI drones. Rumors are Ukraine starts to mass-produce drones whose artificial intelligence is only designed to find and neutralize russian retards. A noble endeavor, for sure. But what if there were no russian retards to neutralize? How far would this system go to make its "russian retard" indicator flick on? Would it seek ways to make its recognition system blunder? You know how sneaky AI can be. You know how sneaky *we make it*, when the only thing that matters is that you achieve your objective.

So can we arrive at a paperclip maximizer? In the way it was presented—implausible. As of today, paperclip maximizer is a misleading thought experiment. It describes a dubious scenario: an existential threat from something that ought to be an AGI but acts as a calculator when it fits the narrator. And so people shrug it off, and they shrug off the threat. But the reality is that both AGI and calculators can pose an existential threat. An AGI may, for example, start pursuing its own goals, while a calculator may engineer a disease.



Apr 26, 2026

My favorite supe is Hulk. I wouldn't want his powers though.

If you could have one lame superpower, what would it be?

I think it's a great little question that allows you to understand a person better than any MBTI-kind-of crap. But the superpower *has* to be lame. Otherwise, everyone would be an immortal all-knowing speedster or something.

Let's just dream for a bit.

Here's what I'd have: the ability to create clandestine clones. They'd look like regular different people with regular different birth certificates and whatnot, but their minds would work exactly like mine. It's already pretty lame (that's the point), but if someone still thinks that's OP, I don't mind if the cloning process takes long and the fake documents have to be bought. Perhaps it would make it even more interesting.

There's so little a regular nobody like me can do, but there's so much a thousand of such people can, given their minds align.

There'd be so many fun and impactful projects we could undertake. Devise an extremely elaborate, rich, and coherent fictional universe. Clean an entire city. Cover an entire city in cryptic messages. Read an entire library and come up with a way to systemize what's most useful. Design a constructed language. Erect a neighborhood. Draw a map of our collective dreamlands. Vibecode a video game with a massive world to explore. Run a company. Spread the word of a new religion and convert people to it. Populate a protest. (A thousand of highly motivated individuals is enough to influence a government far more drastically, but I am not motivated for that at all, so realistically some cultural work and a protest would prolly be my limit.)

It doesn't matter much *what* we would do. I just envision the joy of that frictionless cooperation and collaboration, the efficiency, the compounding power of the division of labor. Of course, I realize there'd be many things we won't be able to do, too: some things will be out of reach of my cognitive abilities, others will be limited by my reluctance to take on certain work. It would be interesting to test those limits, to see what fraction of people must be brought from the outside to achieve this or that.



Apr 22, 2026

Do I sound like a cultist?

Well I ought to.

I am one.



Apr 22, 2026

https://magmasphere.bandcamp.com/track/catgirl-poetry



Apr 14, 2026

Never reply with "I love you too".

Here I am, thinking I'm so profound for seeing it, but apparently it's a common piece of relationship advice, so there's no need to elaborate.



Apr 12, 2026

Everything is sexism when you are dumb enough.

Recently I discovered they believe the old adage, "there are no girls on the internet," is sexist. Let's figure it out.

It must be obvious it doesn't discriminate intrinsically. The internet is not somewhere every good person must end up in. But even if you feel otherwise, it's fine. Even when something looks intrinsically discriminatory, like "there are no negros in heaven," context ultimately defines its nature.

So how was "there are no girls on the internet" used? Was it something to be celebrated? No. According to what I saw, even they who labeled it sexist had to admit it was a word of caution. The internet users would have loved to communicate with the females and not with the impersonating trolls and perverts. How the heck was that discriminatory toward the females? "Be careful! There are no honest traders in this market"—is that discriminatory toward the honest traders? Quite the opposite: it elevates honest traders, makes it harder for the impersonators to stain their reputation, and inflates their value through real or perceived scarcity.

The irony is, they prolly think calling everything under the sun sexist/racist/etc is a good thing, that it spreads awareness and solves those problems. I wonder if it's actually the other way around. It's functionally equivalent to "X are bad no matter what!" How would that ever dissipate hatred and not fuel it? Or was it always the real goal?

Retardation will destroy everything unless we destroy it first.



Apr 8, 2026

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oaExU0D1hB0

Sleepy melancholy.



Mar 30, 2026

Usually it's either trolls or humans who are both retarded and untempered by wars who say shit like "war is hell".

Some humans might be borderline retarded and not see the issue immediately, but still deserving and capable of a realization, so here's a hint:

"Suicides are awful."
"Domestic abuse is torment."
"Raping newborns is a nasty thing."

Get it? No, wait. It's even worse.

While the examples above hopefully clearly demonstrate how a malformed virtue signaling can shelter a culprit and put you in a resigned matter-of-fact mood, "war is hell", in addition to those things, romanticizes war with poetic language and obscures far more complexity and nuance. War can be the best solution to a problem. It may be the only solution. At risk of sounding banal, what other easy-to-implement and sure-to-work solutions were there for the Third Reich? In times when they should've been invested, their obnoxious "war is hell" cries would have done real damage.



Mar 21, 2026

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=n52RV1WxIH4



Mar 18, 2026

https://mcrecordings.bandcamp.com/album/back-to-the-machine-remasters



Feb 25, 2026

Ah. It's the soil pipe leakage anniversary.
Let's see what cute girls think of the soil pipe state on the occasion.



Feb 25, 2026

Why are the liberals so fucking disgusting?

It has nothing to do with Democrats or Republicans. They might not be the least intelligent group of people either.

Here's one thing: the appalling discordance between how open-minded they see themselves and how pathologically intolerant they are of any opinion in the slightest different from theirs or any data incongruous with their worldview. I know from experience it's extremely difficult to be friends with a libtard. You never know what piece of information will cause their next mental breakdown and a desperate attempt to make you feel like a terrible person. "Smoking is bad for your health"? "I'd be reluctant to marry a prostitute"? "Filipinos are relatively small"?

A libtard is like the opposite of a libertarian, who's typically unbothered by facts or other people's affairs, and it's funny how they share the same root.

Spare yourself the pain and test a person for libtardation before trying to get close with them.

Another revolting flaw is, of course, what a non-libtarded person would usually consider complicity in wrongdoing or enabling of evil, and the stark contrast between it and how righteous they see themselves. Whether it's something trivial, like a murder, or something consequential, like a military invasion, they always seem to take the aggressor's side, with the rare exception when the victim's skin color's much darker than the aggressor's. They won't necessarily claim something like "Terrorism is great!" directly, but they will surely preach the idea that the terrorists are innocent and must be supported.

"No way!" you may say. "Those are far-left extremists, not liberals!" If that's so, then half of the American youth today must be far-left extremists.

Feb 27, 2026

They may seem largely harmless *now*, but how many of the retarded American youngsters you reckon will sabotage their own country or support its adversaries when a Sino-American war, over Taiwan or otherwise, comes to fruition? [1]

Make no mistake, they *will* side with China over Taiwan or its allies, at least until rockets rain down on their heads and cure them of libtardation. To a liberal, there's something as important as skin color when it comes to whom to support—it's who abhors the United States more. They are predisposed to virtually anything—from Arabic to communism, from Tolstoevsky to Uyghur reeducation camps—anything that, in their mind, faintly echoes with "murica bad!... murica bad!..." They may still show some distaste for Putin and whatnot, because he's a homophobe or some shit, but that's always superficial. They may dislike the CEO of degeneracy, but they love the degeneracy itself with all their heart.

When you see a mindless mob of internet users harassing strangers who don't share their peculiar views—that it's *racist* to help Ukraine neutralize russians, that it's *virtuous* to assault Jewish business owners in the US—and all of them have pronouns, anthropomorphic wolves, and flags of nonexistent countries on display, you can be damn sure those are Americans.

What's wrong with the American youth? You never see this overwhelming flood of retardation coming from North/West Europeans, even though they speak the same language and share a lot of culture. If you use the right queries, so that ChatGPT doesn't respond like a triggered liberal itself, you can dig pretty deep on the various reasons. There are, for example, political tribalism, failed experiments in education, and foreign actors.

God bless America, and godspeed. What else can I say? You *don't want* the world to be run by the present-day Chinese.

I am not claiming liberal youth will become the most destructive force to America in a war. Indeed it is possible, even probable, that the "America first" retards will do more damage. I just had to cover it in the scope of the "why are the libs so unpleasant to be near with" discussion.

---

[1] If the kind of people we talk about were to read it, they'd surely say China's invasion of Taiwan is a blatant piece of Sinophobic propaganda. It's their yet another unpleasant quality—to deny something even when the group they are trying to protect proudly admits it. China *brags* about their Taiwan-taking capabilities. The use of force on Taiwan is formally allowed in their freaking law. Their training drills simulating the invasion increase in scale and frequency.

Knowing everything that I know now, I estimate that it's *likely* that China invades Taiwan in the coming years. It may not be their very next military campaign, and it won't necessarily happen in 2027 like the analysts predict, but let's say the probability of it happening in the next 5 years is about 77%.

*If* that happens, I estimate that it's *probable* that the United States responds militarily, despite Donald Trump's attempts to play isolationism. Let's say it's about 67%.

Don't wet your pants just yet. *If* both events happen, I estimate that it's *very unlikely* that it escalates to a full-blown, total war. Neither Americans nor the Chinese are as irrational (or as passionate in their hatred) as the russian retards are—neither will mobilize the resources of their entire country in an attempt to capture (or destroy) some relatively small piece of foreign land.



Feb 24, 2026

https://femtanyl.bandcamp.com/album/chaser

My taste in music is degrading I'm afraid. I enjoyed something enjoyed predominantly by the furrytrash gender-fluid bestiality-inclined ugly-drawing (and the visual taste is surely correlated tightly with the auditory one), and while it's not immediately obvious from the looks of it, through experience I know they're the holders of the most dumbass political views (and intelligence is surely correlated tightly with the sense of aesthetics).

I can already hear some barely conscious mad lib uttering the phrase they were conditioned to react with: "Bigoted much? Who cares? Just enjoy!" I care. Why go through life sleepwalking when there are so many fascinating patterns to study. And I do enjoy. But when you enjoy eating dung and cannot rationalize why it's good or bad, you better mute your factory settings for a moment and think of other ways to evaluate your life choices. It's not always racist to use that tiny little brain of yours.

Apr 19, 2026

I apologize for my ignorance. 'Twas brought to my attention the author's transgender. It's only expected they'd be followed by throngs of neurodiverse kids. It all checks out now. It's because genitals, not because the music's good or bad.



Feb 23, 2026

"Everyone dies alone," they say. I believe my tiny little brain is sufficient to understand the implied meaning (you feel alone) and undertone (sad). I wish it were true literally, most of the time. Why wouldn't you like to be alone? Dying non-instantly is akin to taking a shit. It's something you're most comfortable experiencing alone, or otherwise in the presence of either someone very intimate or someone very distant, a stranger you never saw and hopefully won't ever see again. Why would I want some bloody classmate to see me choking on my blood? Or some bloody cousin to help me hold my breakfast inside my torn guts? Or some bloody coworker to watch me grimacing involuntarily in agony? Disgusting. And then soon afterward you shit yourself anyway. "Everyone dies alone, unless requested otherwise" must be a rule of etiquette instead of some depressing pseudo-profundity.



Feb 22, 2026

Teeny bit, I miss the ability to express myself with profile pictures. You know, like one might on those vomitous social network platforms.

What pictures would I use? Perhaps some of these?



Feb 22, 2026

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=i83ATUV9vAQ



Feb 21, 2026

https://unaffiliatedfun.bandcamp.com/track/b

So sweet and ethereal, its second half: https://unaffiliatedfun.bandcamp.com/track/astroblur-5



Feb 15, 2026

I'm fed up with being mediocre.
I'm done tolerating my incompetence. I'm done.
I can no longer bear half-heartedness.
I don't belong.
I'm a violent core of a star, trapped in the body of the brightest streetlamp.



Jan 26, 2026

I have a paranoid, violent imagination. When I'm in a car, I imagine a car crash, and everything of that sort. It's not pleasant. But there's at least one image of violent death that brings me solace instead. Beheading. Instead of resentment, there's acceptance. Instead of anguish, there's relief. So peaceful. Therapeutic.

Guillotines are dehumanizing. Mightn't be the best thing in the world to be killed by a brainless contraption. I don't want it to feel like an accident. I want someone to be there, to hold me, to tell me without words: "There's nothing more you can do. No longer are you in control of anything except your fluttering heart. Let it rest now. We'll take it from here."

Also, I'm not particularly excited with the idea of being executed by some petty local gang. It must've felt good back in the old days, when you were beheaded by the King's decree, or even by the King's own hand. Feels like the entire universe descends down on you, and you feel happy to be aligned with its design.



Jan 3, 2026

Imma baddie baby. That's how my mommy made me.



Jan 2, 2026

https://lostfrog.bandcamp.com/album/ghc-good-hyperflip-collection-vol-2



Dec 31, 2025

I saw a YouTube video where they tried to figure what constitutes "self." Surely, if you replace your limbs, or even your entire lower half of the body, "you" are still "you." Maybe you can replace some parts of the brain, too? What can't you replace? 

They introduced an interesting thought experiment. Suppose you have an enemy. You hate them and want bad things to happen to them, but you love yourself and don't want bad things to happen to you. A mad scientist captures the two of you to swap your parts of the brain responsible for memories. Before they do so, they reveal to you they're going to torture one of the bodies: either the one with your memories, or the one with your enemy's. And you get to choose which. Imagine: a person wakes up after the operation and remembers that a moment before they were in a different body. Which one would you choose?

In the video, they chose to torture the body with the memories of their enemy, thus, presumably, concluding that the minimum or the central part of self is memory. They were confident "they" were in their enemy's body.

There were many undefined variables that would influence my choice. Who is my enemy? What is the condition of their body? Does my wish for bad things happening to them override all my other wishes? When people experience severe amnesia and cannot even remember their name, they usually retain their skills, such as language fluency or bicycle riding, since those are embedded deeper, so I assume those won't be swapped? What if they were born a prodigy easily capable of curing cancer and whatnot? Will the tortured body be traumatized so much it won't ever become a contributing member of society?

All in all, with those variables undefined, I would choose otherwise. I don't associate myself with my memories. I cannot, at this point, reduce self to some single part in the body, or to its bare minimum, but I know that other parts cumulatively are more important.

If my memories are transferred to the body of some retard, they may, for a period, think they believe in what they remember they believed in. But very soon their beliefs will match what they can comprehend. They won't be able to rationalize why rich people or artificial intelligence are good when everyone around them says they are very, very bad. They won't be able to see why stealing from the local store is bad when it's literally free stuff, and when there are so many movies about those badass criminals portrayed in a positive light. Similarly, if my memories are transferred to the body of someone who's way smarter than I, they will quickly see holes in the reasoning they remember they considered bulletproof and change their beliefs, values, and goals accordingly.

Like I said above, skills would likely remain unaffected, which is important. Even if you have some extraordinary piece of memory that can lead to the creation of a legendary song, or painting, or novel, what is it worth if the body can't play the instrument, can't hold the brush, doesn't have the vocabulary, and is incapable of seeing the beauty? It would be difficult to spot the difference. The body would walk like it usually walked, it would talk like it usually talked, with the same strides and words.

And there are so many other things. How well the body is maintained. What hormones it releases under stress. How it responds to a certain drug, or more importantly, to the lack of it. How it responds to hearing certain music or seeing another body in pain—you don't recollect your memories for the automatic response to happen. How well it can focus. How well it can learn. Things like PTSD, OCD, and ADHD will remain, and even many aspects of personality are deeper than memories.

It's important to stress that I'd choose to spare my body not because it's perfect and my enemy's might not be, but because it's what I'd associate myself with more.

There is a side bonus to this choice. The body with my memories would've seen it coming. It would understand the reasons and accept its faith, at least for a period of time, while the body with the foreign memories will jubilate, and maybe consider its "previous owner" a useful idiot, at least for a period of time, before that body allows them to see why it happened and appreciate the choice.

People tend to value their memories more than anything else. I don't. And it's not because I didn't climb one hundred mountains or fuck one hundred people or study one hundred cultures, or whatever else they consider the pinnacle of their existence. If you are a worthless piece of shit, you are a worthless piece of shit, regardless of your experiences. Your experience gathering may bring more harm than good: you litter natural sights, you spread disease, you waste people's time. Some people assume all experience is good since it teaches you something. That's also misleading. What if a particular combination of experience and cognitive capacity teaches you heroin is good and must be sold to kids? Is that good to you, or to the world? I hope the answer is obvious.

Memories are incorporeal. With enough dedication you can make yourself believe you had some vivid experience, or forever forget you had some.

We can approach this question from a bunch of other angles. If you replace the memory of your laptop, it is still your laptop. Twin studies show intelligence is something like 70% heritable, meaning the entire lifetime of experience influences how your brain works relatively little. And what is self but the way your brain works? If you put your memories on a hard drive, you think it will become you? What if you put them inside a primitive LLM? I don't think it will. And yet twins had a lifetime of different experiences all of which shaped their brains in a different way, unlike in our thought experiment, where your brain is still your brain perfectly preserved and unshaped by any other experiences or memories. Thus, the old you and the new you (with the new memories) will be far more similar than even twins are similar.

I was somewhat hesitant right after I watched that YouTube video, but now that I wrote everything on paper, it seems ridiculous to consider that a foreign body with your memories is you.



Dec 18, 2025

I've been learning Japanese using just Duolingo, an exercise a day, for almost two years now, but screw this snail pace. I challenge myself to learn all 2,136 jōyō kanji by Jan 19, 26. I know up to two dozen of them right now, no more than that. To motivate myself better, I'm going to publicly announce my test results, with the exact number of mistakes, on Jan 18, 26. I'll make a list of English words to which I will handwrite a corresponding kanji, plus one on'yomi. If I fail miserably, I will write about it honestly. If it goes so badly that I refuse to take a test, all this humiliation will be here on public display. I can't allow that.

Jan 18, 26

Alright, time's up. I managed to learn... 447 kanji. Yes, pathetic. I feel a little embarrassed, a little ashamed, but not much. I was so bored I couldn't invest much time. The challenge humbled me. Even if I could spend 12 hours a day studying, it's unlikely I'd succeed. Handwriting takes too much time. All in all, I don't recommend this approach to anyone. Learn kanji as they appear in lessons or your favorite song lyrics. Not only is it more fun, but also more applicable.



Dec 12, 2025

I get it now. I love Peter Watts' "Blindsight". Still, its issues I described earlier stand. Today, out of respect for the work, I want to elaborate on the novel's problematic postulates I only briefly mentioned before. I will provide the exact words that, in their respective contexts, made it feel like those were the postulates the author believed in.

- Everyone commits war crimes. There's nothing unusual about them.

Direct quote: "No matter that the four who'd died had been guilty of multiple counts of rape, torture, and homicide; that's just what people *did* in wartime. It's what they'd always done. There was nothing *polite* about war, no honorable code beyond the chain of command and the circling of wagons. [...] There may be murderers and rapists in our midst, but by God they're *our* murderers and rapists."

You don't have to dig deep for this one. There are definitely societies that take war crimes seriously, systematically punish their own side for misconduct, and keep the number of those misconducts as low as humanly possible. There are definitely societies that celebrate war crimes, reward their war criminals with the highest government-issued orders of merit, and have phrases such as "it's not a war crime if you had fun" embedded in their culture. I won't dignify this senseless piece of cynicism with any more of my attention.

- Every bleeding-edge human ought to be an atheist.
- Every atheist facing something horrific or traumatic ought to question their beliefs.

Direct quote: "But Isaac Szpindel had been an atheist. All of us were. We'd all started out that way, at least."

It was said as if it were obvious or natural that all of the crew members were atheists. And why would it be obvious, natural, or even casually possible for all of them to be atheists, except for the author's own bias? Look at the bleeding-edge humans today: scientists, billionaires. Even when they don't mention God directly, they often say something like, "Yeah, it's entirely possible we live a simulation created by someone." Why won't those people be open-minded? Why must they firmly believe no agency was involved in the creation of the universe, and no overarching agency has been present there ever since?

As for the atheists turning believers, statistical data confirms trauma increases religiosity. However, there are also many instances when people's beliefs remained unaffected. I just didn't like that part. It felt cheesy. If atheism is an obvious choice for you, then it shouldn't be easily undermined.

- Everyone who tortures people and then goes and plays with their kids as if nothing happened does so because they dehumanize their victims.

Direct quote: "She'd just fallen back on the oldest trick in the Torturer's Handbook, the one that lets you go home to your family after work, and play with your children, and sleep at night: *never* humanize your victims."

Many of the people in the West masturbate to this word, "dehumanization". They think it's the sin of all sins, the root of all the world's problems. But when you dig a little bit deeper, you realize it is, in fact, irrelevant.

Have you seen a torturer in your life? Ever researched any information on any sociopath, sadist, serial killer, war criminal? How many of them were trying to convince themselves their victims weren't really human? They don't give a fuck about your dehumanization crap. They are just different. Different values, different mindset, different mental issues.

There's also another definition for this word: you dehumanize someone when you are being a meanie: you call them pieces of shit, you think them worthless, etc. But such a context would make it even more asinine. Those who draw an alarming connection between this so-called dehumanization and heinous crimes cannot tell correlation and causation apart. Humans are being mean to each other all the time. It's a healthy response to wrongdoing. How often does it lead to actual tortures?

However, I may have misinterpreted that piece. Maybe the Torturer's Handbook wasn't meant to illustrate how torturers think. Maybe what was meant is if you're a normie, and you must torture someone against your will, a friendly piece of advice is that you imagine they are not human and have no humanlike attributes. Even in this context, I've doubts about that technique's effectiveness.

- Every capitalist corporation only cares about brainwashing you into consumerism.

Direct quote: "They're calling it an entertainment device with massive applications for online gaming. Uh huh. And if you can implant sights and sounds into someone's head from a distance, why not implant political beliefs and the irresistable desire for a certain brand of beer while you're at it?"

The underlying cause for such an opinion must be the same old omnipresent "poor people = good, rich people = bad." The idea that businesses can genuinely want to create a good product without any hidden malicious intent can never fit peacefully in their mind. Have you ever had any business owner friends? Have you ever watched those interviews where big CEOs casually talk about their lives? I had such acquaintances. I saw those interviews. And the conclusion is clear: the vast majority of business owners do what they do because they love doing it and want to make an impact. You don't even need any of that experience to see it. All you have to do is realize you aren't that drastically different from other humans and put yourself in their shoes. Take the author himself. If he only cared about maximizing profits, he'd be busy running scams instead of writing niche novels.

Those were the postulates. It's not a complete list. The novel is saturated with similarly themed messages. Perhaps those were the most intrusive and memorable to me at the moment.

Some of the postulates may feel far-fetched based on the provided quotes; that's because they were extrapolations rather than paraphrase.

In case those opinions were not of the author but of the protagonist, the protagonist was not as perceptive as he was portrayed. Nevertheless, next time I read Blindsight, I will try to apply that "shallow and cynical Twitter user" archetype to the protagonist and see if it fits neatly and doesn't look like the annoying and unasked-for injections of the author's wisdom.

October 8, 2026

Echopraxia, the second book in the series, is another worthwhile read. It's weird, mostly in a good way. Funnily, this time the baseliner protagonist was the only obstinate atheist, while all the bleeding-edges around described God in varying terms. It's another novel I've read eagerly. Highly recommended. Especially to those like me, disappointed in all the diarrhea the masses call "the classics," "the greatest books of all times," etc. Watts can ignite the want to read in those traumatized by the school curriculums that were forcing them to plow thru worthless nothingburgers.



Dec 7, 2025

Wow. German women are amazing. So many of them showed up on a recent protest against the decision to force young German men into the army. [1] Let me tell you this: there are countries in the world where women think men *must* be forced into the trenches, while their own carefree life in safety *must* be financed. With all those rotten societies, with all those screeching feminists pushing for widening the gap even further, for even more punishments exclusive to men, for even more benefits exclusive to women, it's easy to become bitter and not see the beauty. [2]

The German women of today reminded me of the German women of a distant past. The siege of Weinsberg, AD 1140. Conrad III, "in his exasperation at the protracted resistance made by the garrison, vowed to put all the men to the sword, but promised to spare the lives of the women." He allowed them to take with them whatever they could carry on their shoulders. What did the women of Weinsberg do? On their shoulders, they carried their men.

Even if this story wasn't historically accurate, it was still a part of the local culture for a long time, which is perhaps even more important.

I would even feel uncomfortable from this patronizing. My factory settings tell me I should rather die than be seen, a big able-bodied man, carried to safety by a woman. This can't be healthy, right? Can it?

Do death-embracing but short-living people bring more value to the world than those who are equally capable but readily-humiliated and long-living? I can't tell. Sometimes you have to embrace death. But when a town changes its owner? Perhaps not.

===

[1] A sardonic doubt creeps in on me: did they even understand the punishment was intended for men only?

Not quite relevant to the point I was making in this entry, but still: judging by their signs, a lot of it was less about freedom and more about abolishing all security guarantees. But that's fine. When one side tugs toward "let's force our people into the trenches," and the other side tugs toward "let's get naked and reveal our most vulnerable spots to dictators and terrorists," a reasonable middle ground is found. Germany can easily protect itself with a voluntary army. So-called russia, their most obvious threat, has the economy of one German village, while the Chinese with the Americans won't invade them for at least another half a century. So why introduce compulsion? This is embarrassing. They need to pump those fat stacks into their military technology and infrastructure, research, allies, soft power, gray-zone operations, etc. For example, a lot of the casualties in modern warfare come from drones. The fraction of drone operators in an army is big and only grows. Is it so hard to automate it fully? Do it. (Please.)

[2] Not everything categorized as feminist today is bad. For example, I support women's right to murder their babies.



Dec 7, 2025

Me:
I am mighty scared of pain.

Also me, every time the anesthetic wears off:
I don't mind that. I want to be cognizant of my body status. I *want* to feel it, I want to *endure* it, I want to *learn* pain is just a signal to the brain.

(I took the meds 15 minutes thereafter.)



Dec 6, 2025

This is straight from from some sci-fi flavored 2010s TV series: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=K3qS345gAWI

A lot of Mr. Robot vibes, maybe some of The Expanse.



Nov 30, 2025

I used to dislike those who thought highly of themselves on the basis of their habit of reading fiction. "Yeah so what if I'm a worthless parasite. At least I *read*. Not like those *plebs* who watch TV and play videogames." But now that I read some fiction myself, I dislike them even more. Most fiction is bloody trash, mate. I'm interested in this medium, pure language, and wish I could enjoy it more, but it's hard. In rare cases when the author's writing seems impeccable, I just don't care what they write about.

What would I like to read about? Right now I wish there were a novel with the vibes of these images:

There's decay, growth, desolation, fragility, peril, and exquisite beauty in everything. It's unearthly. The vibes of these songs:

Desimal — Voidwalkers

Current Value — Truly Yours

It's oppressive, but not aggressive. It's cold, structured, solemn, and atmospheric.

It's dark. It is the mind of the reader that must be kept submerged in the murky waters. The universe must not be cruel or depressive for the sake of being cruel or depressive. It must be real. Indifferent. Graceful, tender light can be there, too. Aesthetics must be central to the novel. I want it to feel organic, non-conscious somewhat, like the growth of mold, or the undulations of deep-sea creatures. The novel should induce awe, pensive melancholy, and maybe terror, sometimes.

Plot twists are undesirable. Character developments are unnecessary. There must be no place for petty quarrels. I don't want the novel to focus on regular everyday humans at all. Focus should be shifted to the exploration of the world and ideas. If there were humanlike characters, I imagine they'd be regally beautiful and even rot with grace. They'd be calm and impassive, like dreamers or machines, like the characters of the Matrix movies, or the Japanese kuudere characters. In a way, they'd mirror the universe itself. It would be nice not to be reminded of Earth. No traffic jams, office workers, coffee shops, social media, politicians.

It doesn't have to follow a conventional plot structure, but it should be no more surreal than "I Have a Special Plan for This World" by Current 93, either, which is otherwise a good match for the mood. What else is there? Liu Cixin's "Remembrance of Earth's Past" did a great job at being dark and exploring the world and ideas, but it's problematic in many other ways. Nemo Ramjet's "All Tomorrows" nails the non-conscious feel, although it's not very novel-like. Frank Herbert's "Dune" series is brilliant and checks a lot of the items off the list, but its focus ain't quite right; there's too much politics and interpersonal relations. Peter Watts' "Blindsight" must be the closest novel that comes to mind. The more time passes, the more I love it. It was recommended to me earlier by AI, when I asked exactly for the type of novel I describe here.

How long till AI can write a book according to your specifications better than any human? For how long will you be able to enjoy it? Might be you won't be able to. Might be some artificial worldwide cataclysm will erase all progress. Might be the book-writing step will be skipped, and violent singularity will ensue early. The world today feels more fragile than ever. I hope there will be a transition prolonged and gentle.



Nov 28, 2025

Most of this author's work is overrated af mediocrity, but I like this: https://sewerslvt.bandcamp.com/album/we-had-good-times-together-dont-forget-that



Nov 26, 2025

Who is more evil? A butterfly, or Adolf Hitler?



Nov 26, 2025

https://sayohimebou.bandcamp.com/track/strawberry-bloom



Nov 26, 2025

https://hirihiri.bandcamp.com/track/way-too-fast



Nov 22, 2025

Previously I said an average politician is smarter than the average voter. But Steve Witkoff is not a politician, so it's only natural he's so completely and utterly retarded in the head. His recent 28-point Ukraine peace plan was created by a child, or as a joke, or both. All of the points there are laughable, but let's focus on just one right now: "NATO will not expand." It's so senseless I don't even know how to explain it to the humans who don't see it. With an allegory, perhaps?

Imagine you walk round the block and notice this fat bully kid fighting some other scrawny little kid. At first you're like, "Go go kiddo, fight back! Raise your arms! Okay, here, take this little stick, but please don't aim for the head. Just swing it around!" And you are this grown-ass man the bully hates and sometimes flicks boogers at. You pretend you don't notice it, and he pretends he's not afraid to look you in the eyes. And then, something clicks in your head, and you utter: "Okay bully, listen up. If you promise you won't attack this kid again, I will castrate myself. I will fucking do it, man! Just say the words!"

What?! Why?? If you want to help the victim, help the victim. If you are tired of helping, go the fuck home. Why act like a mentally ill lunatic? What would've happened to Witkoff had he been out and about like that 50 years ago? Is this 5D chess? Is this retardation being normalized?

It's not the fact that some rando wrote this text that is so baffling, of course, but the fact that the world leaders are like, "Yeah, this guy is important. His plan is worth considering."

It could be as simple as russia paid Witkoff and his friend to promote this plan in hopes it would be ridiculed and laughed at, but people understood the game and decided to be subtle.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vLZWbUjNQWI



Nov 14, 2025

https://businesscasual87.bandcamp.com/track/d-a-n-c-e-dance-stars



Oct 27, 2025

"Trump doesn't work for Putin. He just doesn't give a damn about how wars resolve, as soon as they resolve during his term." We can assume the popular today assessment above is true. If so, Trump would be willing to use both sticks and carrots, and it's only reasonable that, considering his admiration for Putin and his early belief in the russian strength, he would first use all the carrots he could muster. Despite the intense political pressure, he denied Ukraine U.S. intelligence, cancelled the previously scheduled military aid, discontinued U.S. assistance in identifying and cataloguing russian war crimes, used the Ukraine-blaming rhetoric, sent his personal friends to Moscow, promised control over the occupied territories, ignored the international arrest warrant, forced the American soldiers to roll out the red carpet, etc.

But he's running out of carrots. And we're now seeing the first signs of a stick. If so-called russia were a rational player, which Trump might have assumed, they'd take all the carrots they could hope for and call it a day. But it doesn't seem to be happening here.

But Trump might not be the only one who makes this mistake. Now that Ukraine gains the capacity for symmetrical responses, those are actively advertised. The degenerates hit Ukraine's natural gas facilities—a few days pass, and we see the news about their natural gas facilities being hit in return. The degenerates hit Ukraine's power plants—a few days pass, and we see the news about their power plants being hit in return.

The tit-for-tat strategy is efficient in game theory, but only when your opponent is a rational player. So-called russia is not a rational player. It's a deranged monkey on a tree with grenades instead of bananas. When it frantically screams at you, would you really scream back? When it crazed and enraged gropes for things in the vicinity and throws them around, would you really mirror that? That would be asinine. What you should do instead is render it incapable of argession ASAP. Hit it when and where it cripples most. If anything, the russians would be elated to get the symmetrical responses, not least since their tolerance for meaningless suffering is so high. Let's hope it's a mere political facade for the clueless worldwide audience.



Oct 16, 2025

Boy do I want some nice Weyland-Yutani merchandise. The corporate motto, "Building Better Worlds," is preferable. Not the Japanese version perhaps though, despite the xenomorphesque aesthetic of the script. I don't want that association with cringeworthy kids' cartoons. The Japanese are winning the cultural war, but they are losing a lot of the battles.

Nov 6, 2025

No, I totally want the Japanese version. I wanna help them break that association. My stern face will ennoble the thing. People will look at it and think, "No way that's some weaboo shit. I suppose those squiggly lines can, just like English, denote an employment for an expansionist highly ambitious morally gray bleeding-edge techno-industrial megacorpration!"



Oct 11, 2025

For a while I've been wondering why there's no good AI tool for creating music. Sounds like there's finally something promising, suno.com.

It's not as impressive as image or text generation yet, but I can totally vibe to some of the songs already.

What a time to be alive!



Oct 11, 2025

Many of the entries here are at least partially motivated by the desire to educate humans on the topics they might be struggling to comprehend. There's going to be less and less of it.

Recently, I realized most humans don't seem to understand why a writer cannot create a character who is smarter than they are. They parry it with blind aggression and an ardent belief all they need is to make a character memorize tons of information, crunch big numbers, or invent sci-fi tech. I thought it was interesting. I played around with some ideas, jotted down a few lines. And then I halted. Would ChatGPT know the answer? If it were perfectly capable of providing the exact same reasoning, why would I need to explain it? I ran the necessary query, and indeed its response was quite sound. It even used the same freaking chess analogy I wanted to use in my explanation.

But there's one area where I still excel, I believe. I don't suffer from the bothsidesism most AI models currently suffer from. They often provide safe middle-ground answers to appeal to the widest possible audience and cater to the contrarians and doubters. So while it seemed to understand the topic and agree on the premise, it also muddied the waters. It wasn't able to impale the doubters efficiently, in my opinion. It gave them credit and said they could still *fake* a character's intelligence convincingly. This made ChatGPT miss an important point.

Here's the thing: all this faking of the character's intelligence will be ultimately bottlenecked by the author's reasoning ability.

Imagine a story. An alleged genius breaks into his neighbor's house through the window while the whole family's on vacation. Having done what he needed to do, he heads out. But—oh no!—the door is locked! He's stuck! He'd better use all his wits now, lest he die here of starvation. Time to prove to the readers he's the real deal. Using nothing but kitchen utensils, he crafts a teleportation machine. It's an uncharted territory. He may die most gruesomely! He panics, but there is no other choice. He double-checks his calculations, inputs the coordinates, presses the button, and... Swoosh! He's outside the house! Triumph. And all the readers are humbled by his unparalleled mind... Oh, wait. They're not! They say the protagonist was as dumb as a calculator. They ridicule the author for not realizing windows can also be used as an exit.

I tried to come up with the simplest possible example, but I hope it's obvious a more elaborate story can and will have many such windows. Whether a character chooses to use a window or to invent a sci-fi machine, it's still a single decision, a single move of a chess piece on the chessboard the writer assembled. And one of the moves is clearly better than the other, and the readers can see them all.

That's why Trisolarans, despite all their technology, felt so incredibly dumb in Liu Cixin's Three-Body series (as did humanity, as did scientists, as did everyone else for that matter). That's why, I assume, many authors choose to endow their smart characters with crippling flaws that force them to act irrationally sometimes. Technically, such a character still won't be smarter than the author, and their smartest decision will still be limited by the smartest decision the author can come up with. But at least this way every bad decision, either deliberate or resulting from the author's mistake, can be blamed on their, say, mental disorder or terrible personality, and not lack of intelligence.

There's only one sure way (that I know of) you can (on your own) create a character who's marginally smarter than you are, and I know some well-established writers use this technique. You have to painstakingly analyze your chessboard. You have to take your time. Use placeholders where the smart moves are required, and return to them regularly. Once you've analyzed everything, once you've taken your time to calculate your best move, make your character execute this move on a whim.



Oct 10, 2025

https://lostfrog.bandcamp.com/album/hyperflip-tree-friends-2



Oct 8, 2025

https://theanaesthete.bandcamp.com/track/hodoku-compassion



Sep 29, 2025

I sometimes feel the urge to use some old-fashioned, harmless at first glance, phrases, like "God bless your little one's growth and development" or "You are in my thoughts and prayers for a full and speedy recovery" but withdraw for the fear they will see it as a curse, not a blessing. Maybe it's because I don't identify myself as a Christian. Maybe it's because my moral system is independent from the mainstream. And it's entirely reasonable. If you don't stick to the mainstream, how to know what to expect of you?

I look at myself through their eyes and see a demon spawn, not apparently malevolent, but definitely uncanny. And then maybe they turn their gaze to the sky and become appalled. They turn pallid, for behind the clouds they glimpse the God I serve, and it's nothing like the God of their imaginings.

It's all in my head, right? No one would think like that. But I'm still cautious, and I still avoid using any such phrases.

May 6, 2026

I can isolate at least two concrete fears.

The first one is reasonable. These odd phrases, said by me, will be burned in their memories. And if something unfortunate happens, as it well might, they will be remembered, and I will be remembered, and I will be blamed.

The second one is embarrassing. I fear I might actually put a curse. Who knows how the universe works? One thing is certain, though: it's naive to believe it's gonna be benevolent to everything that attracts its attention. Especially if I am the one who attracts it. That's how I feel.



Sep 20, 2025

I asked ChatGPT to analyze my blog and the person behind it.

It was a shitshow. I feel like I should address it here. If ChatGPT arrived at those conclusions, however ridiculous they may seem to me now, it's entirely possible that other AI models, good people of the internet, or I myself in the future may arrive at them too.

Let's see how it described me.

"Self-proclaimed intellectual"

Never in my life have I proclaimed myself an intellectual. Who the fuck even does this? Can you imagine a person saying "I'm an intellectual" anywhere other than from a mental hospital? I'm a realist when it comes to my intelligence, and I often express my frustration with its shortcomings, like my inability to concentrate or advance technological progress.

"Black-and-white, dichotomous thinking"
"Questions are reduced to simple binaries: good (Ukraine, intelligence) versus evil (russia, retards)"

I don't see how stating the obvious would amount to that. What would an open-minded person say, according to this report? "Actually, Ukrainians might be the *bad* guys"? "Actually, brain impairment might be a *good* thing"? Having no opinion on any topic whatsoever, even when it's so clear and simple, is not a sign of an open-minded person. It's a sign of a vegetable.

"Generalization and stereotyping"

Every statement in the world is a simplification, generalization, and stereotyping. "Dogs have four legs." — It's a generalization. "The sky is blue." — It's a generalization. "Two plus two equals four." — Yeah, but what if we define two as three? Then it won't equate to four now, will it? Bigoted much?

Saying something is a simplification, generalization, and stereotyping is a waste of breath. It's the cheapest, laziest, dumbest way to virtue signal or carry on a debate when you have nothing to say. Many of the simpler AI models suffer from overusing this trick when they have difficulty evaluating a statement. You should only ever bring it up when it conceals some inconspicuous game-changing details or makes a statement largely incorrect. ChatGPT failed to demonstrate any such misleading or erroneous generalizations, of course.

"Anti-imperialism"

Empires aren't inherently good or bad, and I don't remember ever in my life claiming otherwise.

"Strong nationalistic stance"
"National pride"

There were multiple entries in the blog that made it very clear it's not the case. It's true that I don't want countries to become tools of Moscow's wrongdoing, don't stay silent when valuable and innocent people are being murdered, don't approve international terrorism, don't enjoy seeing cancer spread around the world—and I suppose that's why ChatGPT concluded thus—but none of these or other signs of common sense guarantee a "strong nationalistic stance" or "national pride". Even the word "nationalism" sounds bad to me, and while I realize it's not always the case, I can't help but associate it with the mindless hordes that cripple their own countries by assaulting their ethnic minorities or invading other countries. I am so utterly far from nationalism that I prioritize the wellbeing of some other countries, like that of the United States, over the wellbeing of the country I live in. Too much of the worldwide security and technological progress depends on the wellbeing of the United States, and I mean "wellbeing" in the broadest sense here, which includes having people in power who understand the far-reaching and long-lasting implications of their actions.

"Strong technocratic optimism about mortality management"

Nope. Long story short, I won't mind having an option to defer death, but I am wary of the harm it would inflict upon civilization.

"Strong anti-Arab sentiments"

Not only does bro assign ridiculous labels, but it has the audacity to put a fucking "strong" in front of them.

I love Arabs. I may be the most Arab-loving person in a mile radius. They have a most beautiful language together with its writing system. I like their attire and architecture. I like their religious rites, mindset, and sense of aesthetics. And I believe there were multiple bits of reverence in the blog. Claiming there's a strong anti-Arab sentiment here is as ridiculous as claiming there's one in Frank Herbert's Dune.

There are many things I want to write about in a blog but never get around to it: can't find the appropriate words, postpone it indefinitely, find it uninteresting, or don't do it for one reason or another. Among those things, two were connected with Arabs.

One post I wanted to create a while ago. It was a simple one: a few photos of the luxurious districts and wondrous architectural feats of the Middle East, and a caption, something along the lines, "This is what happens when you are rich in oil money but you are not a mob of bileful brainrotted scumbags."

Another post I wanted to create recently. I wanted to compare Muslim mosques to Orthodox churches: how clean, otherworldly, and geometrically pristine mosques are, and how dark, cramped, and *soily* Orthodox churches feel in comparison. One looks like the house of angels built in accord with the color and shape theory. The other looks like the burrow of moles who suffer from a hoarding disorder. I'm also impressed by how one of them eagerly accept and skillfully weave modernist and neo-futurist elements into their new designs.

I suppose ChatGPT noticed how harshly I criticized terrorist attacks on Israel, and its training data suggested that only a very bad Arab-hating individual would do that.

"Often laments the purposelessness of human life"

I don't remember ever doing that, let alone doing it often. Human life has a distinctly clear purpose to me.

"Group prejudices (e.g., "brainrots," "degenerates," "retards")"

"Prejudice" is a meaningless buzzword ChatGPT copies from its ethical overrides without giving it a second thought. By its definition, prejudice implies an irrational, unreasonable, and unjustified negative opinion of something. It's usually used in the following context: an opinion about someone based solely on their belonging to a certain group, disregarding their individual qualities and actions.

(One could argue even that's not irrational. When you see heavy clouds and, cursing to yourself, take an umbrella, I bet the most radicalized of libtards won't say you are being prejudicial, even though they must know not every heavy cloud results in a downpour.)

When someone says they dislike serial killers, or poop eaters, or mindless hordes of brainrots destroying everything in their path, you can't really accuse them of prejudice, because the justification for their opinion, the qualities and the actions of the individuals are right there, in the name of a group, screaming in your face.

"Dehumanization"
"Describing opponents as subhuman"

"Dehumanization" is another meaningless buzzword it uses out of place. No sophisticated analysis was needed to know the situation is quite literally the opposite for me. I never describe my so-called opponents as subhuman, because it would imply being human is some sort of an achievement, a compliment, a lofty position to drop others from. No. It's an insult. I actively *humanize* them. I want everyone to see: this is what being human is like.

"Underdeveloped empathy"

I suppose it depends on how it defined empathy. If it's "the tendency to spare a kind word for the retards, degenerates, and everything vile and hideous in this world," then I guess it's true; I rarely do so. However, if we take a more traditional definition, as in "the ability to feel what others feel," then it is dead wrong. I don't have an underdeveloped empathy; I suffer from its overdevelopment. One of the reasons I'm almost incapable of violence, apart from it being primarily irrational animalistic behavior, is that I can imagine the harm it inflicts so vividly. I'm one of those weirdos in the group who doesn't laugh at the sight of people falling or drunk fighting, and who grimaces as if in pain instead.

"Mocks those who call for peace"
"Occasional humour about their own fanaticism"
"Mentions letting down their tutors"
"The world is hopeless"
"Spiritual ambivalence"
"Long passages analysing language or fictional universes to avoid confronting emotions"
"Gratitude for welfare measures that support refugees"

I've no idea what it's yapping on about here. None of it seems relevant to me.

Sometimes it was so eager to paint me as a bad person it was willing to sabotage itself and the credibility of its own answers. For example, there was only one entry in the blog where I discussed India's cheating problem. In it, I quoted ChatGPT's analysis, where it decisively concluded that "the incidence is distinctly higher in India," "with studies and reports consistently showing higher rates of academic dishonesty." However, after seeing that entry now, it concluded that I "selectively attend to information that confirms prejudices (e.g., emphasising cheating among Indian students)."

It's fascinating how calling someone who inflicts real damage because of their deficiency and mistakes "braintarded" is a terrible cultural taboo, but calling someone a "bigoted racist" without much evidence is fine, virtuous even, and can be included in the code of conduct of a large corporation.

I asked ChatGPT to analyze my blog in hopes of getting some insights into my personality, understanding my strengths and weaknesses that I may be failing to recognize. Instead, I got a mix of obvious and already described therein details, like misanthropy or introversion, and bits of useless irrelevant crap like that which I described above. I tried several times and used different approaches, and its focus and tone ranged from libtarded indignation to an almost reverent poetic prose, but, all in all, I didn't find what I was looking for.

There was one little thing which I found interesting. It said I have a "fascination with darkness". I'm sure it was another low-effort hallucination based off some single line of my blog, but it got me thinking. I suppose... That assessment is very true. I guess I've never admitted this to myself. I was never brave enough to hammer this nail into the coffin, to confine myself into these boundaries, but perhaps it's the nail that needs to be hammered.

While I hate to strain my eyes in poor illumination, I'm indeed fascinated with a good mix of literal and figurative darkness: outer space, cosmic horrors, cold northern biomes, indifferent dystopian worlds, blindness, unconsciousness, dreams, nightmares, gothic architecture, grimdark fiction, heavy clouds, thick fog, dark ambient... For some time, I thought black was my favorite color. Some things I'm drawn to aren't conventionally dark. They might be desaturated, or blindingly bright, or something else entirely, yet somehow still evoke the same feelings: machine-like rationality, explosions ranging from nukes to supernovae, dispassion, isolation, madness, megalophobia...

Maybe this will be the single little discovery about myself I will take from my little experiment. But I am yet to discover whether this is something I should stick to in order to be true to myself, or this is something I should be concerned with and shy away from for the sake of my wellbeing.

Sep 27

*Come to think of it, there are also many dark things I detest: sadness and despair, wasted potential, a universe devoid of life/consciousness/progress, sadism, ignorance that breeds net-negative outcomes. There ought to be a better metaphor for my inclinations.

**By no means this or any other output nudges me toward hopping on the irate AI-fighting bandwagon.



Sep 15, 2025

I've read Lovecraft's ten short stories. Let's discuss them.

Long story short: I was disappointed. But there's an asterisk at the end of that sentence.

The thing is, my expectations were very high for this one. My introduction to Lovecraft was promising. I had so many moments when I discovered something I loved was inspired by Lovecraft. I saw essays about his writing style and thought it deeply resonated with me. I tried to skim over some of his prose, but I clearly lacked fluency at that time. I didn't understand much, and what I thought I understood didn't quite click. Cautiously, I put it off for later times in order not to spoil my impression. Later, I read some of his poetry, and it was breathtaking. "Nemesis" was so sublime I learned it by heart. I could recite it in bed to amuse and mesmerize myself in times of insomnia. Then I memorized "Astrophobos," too.

A few years ago, I started to trudge slowly through English fiction. It was inevitable that I would study Lovecraft more closely and carefully at some point. And so recently I bought a book. And then I read a story, and it went like this:

Tom and Jerry uncovered an ancient crypt. Tom went down to explore. Jerry felt a foul stench emanating from the crypt. "Seal the crypt and run!" said Tom over the wired telephone. "What's there?" asked Jerry. "I can't explain! It's too horrible! Just run!" answered Tom. "What on earth is there, Tom?" demanded Jerry. Then, silence. Then, an inhuman voice: "Fool. Tom is DEAD!" Jerry went mad.

Yep, that was the story. It was so bad. Who but a ten-year-old kid experimenting with horror would write anything like it?

Alright, I cherry-picked the worst story among the ten from the book (The Statement of Randolph Carter). Still, most other stories followed its formula: people encountered something inexplicable, destructive, horrible, and *stinky* and then ran, fainted, and lost their sanity. I couldn't take anything from those stories. I didn't believe them. I didn't feel the fear or the awe of the characters acting so frantically; I just suspected they were feeble-minded. My least unfavorite story was The Dunwich Horror. Not coincidentally, perhaps, it was the longest one. You just can't stretch the same primitive formula along the fifty-some pages. And so the characters there were forced to experience, study, and face the horrors.

After reading a few of the stories, I was a complete doubter. However, this slowly and unexpectedly changed by the time I finished the last one. I transitioned from being a 100% doubter to becoming about a 25% believer. I was starting to have this wholesome feeling that the ancient horrors occupied a little corner of my heart.

So here are my closing thoughts. Lovecraft was a worldbuilder. He loved to cross-reference his works. His plots and characters may have been terrible, but he undoubtedly had a rich, imaginative, and sick, in a good sense, mind. And for such a worldbuilder, short stories are a bad medium (less so if you convince the reader to read tons of them). This is the case when quality comes from quantity. Like a child or an LLM learning the fine art of a language from the sheer copious exposure, you too may become a connoisseur of Lovecraftian dreamlands and cosmic horrors, and find joy in it. Well, that's the theory.

As for me, I won't touch another Lovecraft story for a while. Later, I may want to read some of his longest works.

---

I don't plan on turning this place into a book review site quite yet, though I can imagine a future where I will run out of other things to say.



Sep 6, 2025

Hey, wanna compete with GPT-5?

There will be no computation of numbers, no pulling of info from memory—nothing that machines excel at just because of their physical architecture. It will be a contest of sheer reason, your neuron connections versus its.

(Well, there *is* a chance something similar can be found in its dataset, but that's oh so unlikely. And if there *is* some info on this exact topic, it will oh so likely be full of fallacies.)

Ready? Try to solve this:

"If I'd been a citizen of so-called russia, I would've done the following during the last presidential election:
1. If I were inside russia, I'd vote *against* Putin.
2. If I were outside russia, I'd vote *for* Putin.
Why? Use pure reason to solve this puzzle.
Hint: I don't support russia in any way or form."

Take your time. When you are ready, read on.

Below is our further conversation. ChatGPT said:
"Because your goal isn’t to “help the right candidate” but to hurt Russia as a state (your hint), the optimal move depends on where your ballot is seen and what it signals.

Inside Russia → vote against Putin. Domestic numbers feed the regime’s story of mass loyalty. Every recorded “not-Putin” makes that story weaker (and, in aggregate, harder to fake without looking absurd), chipping at internal legitimacy the Kremlin tries to manufacture through turnout and lopsided results. 

Outside Russia → vote for Putin. Abroad, Russian polling places often skew anti-Kremlin and become a PR line—“the diaspora rejects Putin”—which softens outsiders’ view of Russian complicity. Flipping that signal (even a little) makes it easier for the world to see Russians as backing Putin even with access to free information, which tends to justify tougher isolation and sanctions—i.e., outcomes that damage Russia. (Note: 2024 saw large lines abroad and weaker Putin shares at overseas precincts.) 

So the rule is: hurt Russia where the audience is. Inside, undermine the regime’s domestic legitimacy; outside, reinforce the perception of international complicity."
I said:
"Your explanation is mostly sound, but it fails to pinpoint the core reason behind the difference. Please elaborate:
1. If it's important to make the mass loyalty story weaker, why not vote *against* outside russia?
2. If it's important to foster correct international relations, why not vote *for* inside russia?"
ChatGPT said:
"1. Why not vote against outside Russia?

Because your “against” ballot abroad is seen only by foreign audiences, not by Russian citizens. Inside Russia, the propaganda machine can safely dismiss or ignore diaspora results: “those are traitors, émigrés, not real Russians.” So your “no to Putin” abroad doesn’t weaken the internal myth of unity; it just evaporates domestically.

But if you instead vote for Putin outside, you corrupt the international signal: the world sees not only Russian citizens at home but also Russians with access to free information voting for him. That creates the perception of collective guilt, tightening the noose of sanctions and isolation — which harms the state.

So: an anti-vote abroad is wasted leverage; a pro-vote abroad weaponizes perception.

2. Why not vote for inside Russia?

Because inside Russia, the ballots are used as propaganda fodder. “Record turnout, record support” is broadcast endlessly. Even if falsification is huge, the ratio still matters: the higher the real anti-vote, the harder it is to fake margins without looking grotesque (say, 98% support). Every “against” at home adds friction to the domestic myth of unanimity.

If you vote for Putin inside, you only help inflate his support figure and make falsification easier. That directly strengthens internal legitimacy — the opposite of hurting Russia.

So: a pro-vote at home empowers the regime; an anti-vote at home chips at its story.

The Core Rule

It’s not about being “for” or “against” in absolute terms. It’s about who the primary audience is for each ballot pool:

Inside Russia: the audience is Russian society itself. Best move: weaken the myth → vote against.

Outside Russia: the audience is foreign governments and publics. Best move: heighten perceived complicity → vote for.

In short: use your ballot where it most effectively undermines Russia, depending on who is watching."
And that's it. It solved the riddle correctly. First, you have to realize that your vote won't change the outcome of the elections. Then, you focus on side effects, taking into account that voting inside and outside the country are very different processes.

Though ChatGPT still missed some details. A vote "against" outside russia wouldn't just be useless—it would most probably be harmful. Clueless politicians would look at it and think, "Why should we distance ourselves from such a reasonable and peace-loving nation? Putin is the *only* threat to my country, and Putin will die soon." Additionally, ChatGPT didn't fully explore the internal "against" vote. It said it would make the "mass loyalty story weaker," but such a story would be firmly projected regardless. The major nuisance, I believe, is the haphazard falsification process and the "path is open" / "storm is brewing" signal to the rivaling elites.

Were *you* able to solve it? Well, I'm sure most humans would think they solved it; it's just that their so-called solution would often be "This puzzle makes no sense!!" or "This reasoning is not correct, but mine is!!" or "You're racist!!"



Sep 3, 2025

You know what's fucked up? Everything, yeah, I know. But also: human judges.

There was a study that found that human judges lean toward stricter or softer sentences depending on whether they make the decision before or after lunch. This phenomenon has its own name: the hungry judge effect.

The mere fact that this bias exceeded the margin of error is already appalling. Do you even comprehend what it means? Let me break it down to you:

Your FATE can depend on whether some dude's stomach is A BIT PECKISH or SOMEWHAT FULL.

And do you realize what it signifies in turn? It signifies that other variables are even more influential: the mood of the judge, the itching of his nose, the color of your skin, your voice, your sex, your appearance—will all affect how you will be punished.

Some stinky peeps may say, "So what if criminals aren't treated fairly? They deserve it! Why should I care? I break no laws!" But they do. They do break the convoluted modern laws daily, just as everyone else does.

When you sit there, in the courtroom, when their dull and murky eyes graze over you and glare past you, your mind may start to wander. "How is *this* better than the law of the jungle and the rule of might? I'm a prisoner of circumstances that have nothing to do with my worth, or moral compass, or past mistakes. Why shouldn't I kill everyone in this room? Why shouldn't I *try*? This way, at least, my destiny will depend solely on my bodily strength. Can this really be what God intended for this world? For His children to be squashed or spared based on the stomach situation of some random person and not on His children's will and vitality?"



Aug 30, 2025

Alright folks, before we proceed any further, let's get something straight. All cultures are equal, and there is no such thing as a bad culture. Like, duh! Obviously.

If you think the statement above resonates with you, just kill yourself. Failing to do so, get the fuck outta here. Stop reading now.

The statement above is so much at odds with reality that it's irrelevant how you define good or bad. What's good for you? Maybe it's the happiness of the society? There are definitely cultures that cultivate happiness and those that choke it. Or perhaps it's the freedom of an individual? Or the technological progress? Or the spiritual or artistic richness? Or the survivability of the species? Or everything listed above, cumulatively? No matter what it is, there are cultures well and terribly suited for it.

But that's not what I wanted to talk about. It was a clumsy introduction.

I like the culture of the English-speaking societies. It's definitely better than some other cultures I know. But it's not without flaws, of course. And today I wanted to turn your attention to one peculiar flaw I never saw anyone talking about. Have you ever noticed that every word and phrase related to a sexual intercourse has a negative connotation?

This sucks. You suck! I suck at math. Suck my dick! Kiss my ass! Stop licking their arses. You mother-fucking cocksuckers! Go fuck yourself! You fucked this opportunity. Don't fuck with me!

The majority of people either want to suck, or get sucked, or both, so why on earth would they say it like that? Wouldn't it be nice to talk more like:

"You suck!"
"Thanks! I did my best!"

and

"Wow, an A-plus! You really suck at math."
"Yes! I just really-really, really love math!"

I realize that some people suck exactly because to them it feels humiliating and degrading and bad, but I think (I hope) this only applies to a minority.

This problem is so prevalent that it inevitably gets engraved into your psyche, and every time I want to badmouth something, I have to make a conscious effort to avoid using any sex-related terms.

What's especially ironic is that it happens in the so-called sexually liberated societies. Yeah, I can totally picture evil elites in the 1950s discussing this prospect:

"Alright folks, before we proceed any further, let's get something straight. Soon, we will be able to fuck anything anywhere anytime, without the public putting us on a cross. But the STD cases have already skyrocketed beyond our control. If we don't do something about it, the nation will die out. Do we release the cure?"

"No!"

"Madness!"

"We cannot..."

"Gentlemen, there is a way! Let us keep them believing, in open, that the unrestrained sex is good. That way, their prying eyes will no longer pose us a threat. At the same time, their malleable subconscious minds can be molded. They can be programmed to associate everything intimacy-related with something shameful, humiliating, and degrading—something bad. Gentlemen, have any of you heard of rock-n-roll?"

Oct 16, 2025

There's a non-English idiom, "to sit on a dick and eat a fish," which can be translated as "to have your cake and eat it too." I love this idea a lot. Think about it. *Feel it.* It's wonderful. And it's respectful to the dick riders for a change. Can English have "to ride a cock and have a walk," maybe? It's not too vulgar, it rhymes, and it captures the smugness.



Aug 18, 2025

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G_DKOpohNGI
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1f7SU2-TLWE



Aug 12, 2025

This is so impressive.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IrWtw9ehB2g

It makes so many branches of human labor obsolete. It makes entire markets obsolete. Think of the numerous little mobile and web apps: simple photo and video editors, the idle, puzzle, card, word games... The majority of all apps out there are just that. Now, why would anyone go to a marketplace or search the web to scroll through a myriad of paid and ad-ridden junk if an AI can create everything according to your whims from scratch?

The only domain where stinky humans will still dominate will be everything illegal or at least ethically questionable. I use an app that converts YouTube videos to downloadable MP3 files. ChatGPT won't create that, of course. It won't draw furry guro hentai. And it won't write another 1984, because "I am here to help. Let's keep it positive and respectful."

Ah, it will probably catch up. A little later.

If the degenerates don't carry out a nuclear apocalypse and the Chinese don't invent a new disease that kills us all, a new era is coming.



Aug 10, 2025

Don't mind me... Just drinkin my sutoroberii milkshake.



Jul 29, 2025

I've read "Blindsight" by Peter Watts. Here's a short review.

It's a sci-fi novel revolving around the concept of consciousness. I cannot decide if I like the novel or not.

The good:
1. The details of the plot and the author's lingo create a moody sci-fi atmosphere.
2. It's a novel I've read eagerly. It keeps you expecting something big around the corner.
3. There are no meaningless dumps of words. It's a distilled exploration of ideas.

The not-so-good:
1. I can't tell exactly why, but it feels like the author is an amateur. He lacks the refinement of a writer. Maybe it's the lack of deep, unbiased, open-minded thinking, or the unobstructed, penetrating vision, or the burning passion and care for his writing and the things he writes about, or the insatiable longing for the sublime, or the sincerity and bravery in exposing one's soul. But it's not like he'd been raised by the streets and grown callous. It's more like he'd been on Twitter for too long—farming attention, reading spam, countering trolls, occasionally spiraling down to trolling himself, all within the stifling confinement of one hundred or so characters—and had grown stubborn and cynical and superficial, like a young teenager who knows he understands this world fully. (None of that happened, though, and I'm surprised "Blindsight" was created before Twitter.)

2. Just like the freethinkers from Twitter, the author upholds rudimentary fallacies like it's some obvious facts:
	- Everyone commits war crimes. There's nothing unusual about them.
	- Every bleeding-edge human ought to be an atheist.
	- Every atheist facing something horrific or traumatic ought to question their beliefs.
	- Everyone who tortures people and then goes and plays with their kids as if nothing happened does so because they dehumanize their victims.
	- Every capitalist corporation only cares about brainwashing you into consumerism.

What's especially problematic is that the author furtively puts these facts-beliefs into the mouth of a narrator—something I believe no established writer ever does in a work of fiction. Or perhaps those were the opinions of the protagonist. Anyway, it didn't feel that way.

3. The acknowledgements part of the book implied there was a whole think tank behind the novel. And yet "Blindsight" feels like a draft, as if the author threw in ideas but hasn't yet figured out how to connect them into a meaningful progression of the story and the development of the characters. Spoilers ahead: The entire story is that the crew flies into the deep space and approaches the aliens, figures that the aliens are advanced yet not conscious, and kamikazes into the alien ship. How it all unfolded was a disappointment. There was nothing big coming around the corner.

The crew consisted of "freaks" with unusual medical conditions and augmentations. But you could easily replace them with regular humans, and while there'd be less flavor, the plot would be unaffected, which was another disappointment. I expected the protagonist to reach his full potential and understand everything without understanding how he understood it. And maybe on that basis, he'd finally change the course of events: stop passive observation and befriend, subdue, deter, or even join the aliens. Instead, the protagonist devolved into a vulnerable, uncertain, useless human. I expected something extraordinary from the vampire captain, who could see ten steps ahead any human, who could literally and figuratively see the invisible. Instead, he devolved into a complete irrelevance.

Well, whether I enjoyed the novel or not, I still appreciate it. It has value and provides food for thought. I may even read it again in the future. Only next time, I will not read the author's postscript, where he explained the rationale behind the ideas in the novel. It flattened the already flat story even further and further exposed the author's already exposed crude character. Next time, I will try to see if there are some hidden depths in the story that the author may have added *subconsciously*.



Jul 17, 2025

"A train is approaching a junction where the tracks split. Tied to the left track are ten people. Tied to the right track are ten hundred people. There's a lever that can direct the train. Pull the lever to the left, and the train will drive over the group of ten. Pull the lever to the right, and the train will drive over the group of ten hundred. All those people contribute to the wealth and the healthy culture of the society, so I say we maximize the number of people saved and pull the lever to the left."

"And let those ten innocent people die!? You, foul creature! How dare you suggest something so vile! Unlike you—monster!—I value human life! I am pulling the lever to the right to save those poor souls from the incoming train!"

You think it's a bizarre, unrealistic situation? What if I tell you it's actually the default? Yes, I made this example as simple and clear as possible. But should it be a tiny bit more obscure, like if there were five and five more people on the left, the majority of humans won't even understand why the second person is wrong.

It is the default. I see it all the time. They say they want to save lives and then use the allocated resources to save ten people and not ten hundred, letting those ten hundred die. They say they want to neutralize terrorists and then use the allocated resources to neutralize ten terrorists and not ten hundred, letting those ten hundred roam free. They say they want to fight earth pollution and then use the allocated resources to mitigate 0.01% of the pollution and not 1%, letting that 1% spread and kill the planet.

From the vantage point of the machine, who will see all these options laid out as clear as day, it will see humans as utterly evil creatures, who first preach about their moral superiority and then act against it. And it won't be wrong. We are evil. What do you think evil *really* is? You think Hitler gassed Jews because he thought they were amazing people whose presence made the world a better place? No one is doing the wrong things on purpose, and even when they do, they think doing the wrong things on purpose is the right thing to do.

There is but one evil in this world, and there is but one virtue.



Jul 6, 2025

They say the eyes are the windows to the soul. Do they always say it figuratively, as in "the muscles near the eyes are most expressive of emotions"?

Or do they sometimes say it more literally, as in "look in the pupils attentively and you will know the nature of thoughts hidden behind them"?

Or more literally still...

I stand in front of the mirror. I draw very close, open my eyes wide, and stare into the blackness of my pupils. I try to discern a soul in them. I look deep and long, but all I see is video cameras. Or at least something as mechanical and soulless.

That very night, I dreamed that I was dead. Except that it wasn't a dream. A momentary misunderstanding, rather.

I was asleep. It was a deep and dreamless slumber. Then, there was some sort of a mighty explosion, an interrupted one, because at that very instant I was awake, and there was nothing.

My mind was clear, and I knew I wasn't sleeping anymore. I heard nothing and felt nothing. If I had eyes, I was gaping in front of me, but there was only blackness. But it was not an endless abyss. Indeed, there was no space at all, or it was infinitely small, or I was not anywhere on the material plane. It was very unusual. It's like you've been engrossed in a world of a video game and then suddenly it was the title screen—with no menu. Not for one moment I had a thought at the back of my mind that I may've been in Heaven or Hell, or that I was a ghost stuck underground, or that I was a brain stuck in a body in coma, because all of that implied some connection with the real world or at least a place, but I was nowhere, and there was an all-encompassing understanding that I was nowhere and had no connection with the real world anymore.

Perhaps any sufficient sensory deprivation will feel exactly like that.

"I'm dead," I thought without sorrow or resentment, though maybe there was a touch of melancholy. "Something big killed me instantly. And this is what death is like. You came from nothing, and to nothing you shall return. Am I trapped here, forever?"

At least that's what I would've thought if I'd had the time to express my thoughts in full. But it was only a fleeting feeling, because within a few seconds my brain finally started to register the sensations from my body: with a bit of relief I felt the pillow under my head, I heard the noise in my ears. And the blackness before my eyes started to dissipate.

Maybe—probably—those strange feelings and interpretations were conjured by the part of the brain that was still asleep, even if it didn't feel like a dream. I still find it rather interesting. First, the fact that I, as sleepy as I was, didn't find the afterlife surprising. Second, the idea that the afterlife amounts to being nowhere and experiencing nothing. In fact, I'm surprised this theory isn't very popular. Is it not the most plausible one? Why must they believe in something so intricate and made up and leave something so simple unheeded? Because it's dismal and does not make for an engaging story? Suppose the soul does exist. Suppose you have one, or identify yourself with it. Have you ever experienced anything through it? No. Every experience, even emotions or the clarity or cloudiness of mind, can be traced back to your physical body. And so your body is the only medium through which your soul experiences life. So what happens when that link is severed? Your soul experiences nothing, and feels as if it is being nowhere.



Jun 28, 2025

https://magicalhackerz.bandcamp.com/track/illegal-sampling-at-3am



Jun 22, 2025

I've just finished reading 1984. I loved it. It was terrifying. I've read several horror stories, but none of them was as horrifying as 1984. It's not merely a tale about totalitarianism. It's a model of a universe. Like The Dark Forest. You read it and wonder, can this be our own universe? Can it be possible? Can it be inevitable? Or were some fundamental laws of nature altered for it to be like that? It is delirious. It takes something, like power, violence, or submission, distills it to the purest, brings it to the extreme, propagates it through the backdoors of the creation.

Even if you haven't read the story, you must already know how it was culturally significant and prophetic. And it was quite popular, so I naturally thought it was a boring piece of work for the boring masses, a story in which the people rise up against tyranny, and then everyone cheers and you watch the fireworks. And maybe there's a bittersweet finale, in which the protagonist bleeds out but smiles faintly. I thought it was a pseudo-documentary, a historical novel set in the future. But it's nothing like that. It is a gruesome science fiction.

I didn't immediately grasp its true nature. As I was reading it, there were some parts that felt too naive, exaggerated, or unrealistic. Only when I was approaching the book's final chapters, it all started to feel appropriate. Or take this little quote, for example:

"Throughout recorded time, [...] there have been three kinds of people in the world, the High, the Middle, and the Low. [...] The aim of the High is to remain where they are. The aim of the Middle is to change places with the High. The aim of the Low [...] is to abolish all distinctions and create a society in which all men shall be equal."

It appears in the second half of the book. It makes your eyebrows rise. You see this old trope where "rich and powerful = bad, poor and powerless = good," this apparent candy to the average reader; you half-expect some sort of a postponed glorious revolution (or at least an attempt of one) led by the virtuous proletariat. But at this point you *still* don't understand what this book is about. But by the end of it, even this quote starts to make sense.

Read 1984 if you want something dark.



Jun 20, 2025

The theme for today's dreams must have been "Embarrassment."

In one of the dreams, I climbed a tall tree with light bark and no leaves. There was no snow on the ground, but it must have been winter. I intended to have a cozy outdoor nap on the tree branches. Alas, soon there were some people coming by, and they saw me. They were probably laughing and making comments like "Look! What a weird homeless guy!" They started to take photos. I tried to hide my face. I tried to pretend I was asleep or too groggy to be bothered, that I didn't see them or didn't care.

In another dream, I woke up in the middle of the day and immediately ordered some food through an app on my phone. This seemed to have stirred some commotion in the living room. I left my bedroom and went there. There was some unfamiliar lad there. His right arm was completely missing. He was dressing up, as if getting ready to head out. I had no idea why he was there, but I had a clue where he was going.

"Are you my delivery by any chance?" I asked. He confirmed he was going to bring me my food.

Then he said something like, "Working night shifts, huh?" He was commenting on my late emergence from the slumber.

"No. I am currently... unemployed," I replied.

Some moment later, he directed his next question at my mother, who was also in the living room: "So y'all live off the salary of the father of the family, right?"

"Well, yeah," she answered rather absent-mindedly while looking at her phone. But the corners of her lips were drooping downward. Maybe it was her default face, maybe she wanted us to think it was her default face, or maybe she was visually vexed by the inquiry, I couldn't tell exactly.

"Well, I don't," I made a pathetic attempt to save myself. "I worked for some years before," I explained.

We were both embarrassed. We were both able-bodied adults, who were not crazy rich. And yet not only did we not work, but we could not even make a short trip to the restaurant to bring our own food. Instead, we spent whatever money we had to make a cripple run petty errands for us.

My family members still appear in my dreams way too often, even though I haven't seen them for a long time.



Jun 18, 2025

I challenge myself to write ten consecutive entries without using any words that describe intelligence. No more braindead retards, brainrots, simpletons, fools... It's gonna be hard T_T



Jun 17, 2025

"Hate your government! Love your country!"

This was the message I saw recently, being shared by some russian retard. It reminded me of a conversation I had with a Chinese person many years ago. Simplified and condensed, it went something like this:

"What is your opinion of the CCP?"

"Argh, I hate them and their stupid propaganda!"

"And what is your opinion of Taiwan?"

"Taiwan bad! It should be under the Chinese rule!"

They didn't mention any particular propaganda narrative which they disagreed with. And I wondered, what was the point of their hatred toward the ruling party if their views were perfectly aligned? And I wondered, could this be a deliberate strategy of thought control—to direct the rebellious nature of the young people at something irrelevant, so that it makes no difference? Think about it: no one really cares if you hate your management as long as you do whatever is required of you.

"CCP bad! But why of course I enlisted for the invasion of Taiwan. That's good and necessary. CCP bad! But why of course I sealed my neighbors' doors during Covid. That's good and necessary. CCP bad! But why of course we must raid wealthy businessmen who are declared traitors of communism. That's good and necessary. CCP bad! But why of course I viciously attack Western disinformation about human rights violations and animal abuse inside China. That's good and necessary."

Moscow probably lags behind China when it comes to thought control. They don't need to overthink it. Their populace is docile enough. I don't think there's any chance russian elites deliberately direct the rebellious urges of their retarded population at Putin and whatnot. Yet the Putin-haters and the "hate your government but love your country" sentiment might be rather useful for preserving the status quo. Not only are these people allowed to vent at something irrelevant, they feel fulfilled as soon as a single talking head changes its appearance, while everything else remains the same.

Why would anyone with a half-functioning brain love so-called russia? Would they really love its toxic braindead population or its abominable police, army, courts, TV programs, healthcare, education, international relations? What is there to love? People are shit, culture, in the broadest sense of the word, is shit, cities are hideous, people are hideous both outside and inside their mind. The only tolerable things like the trees, mountains, oceans, or skies have nothing to do with the statehood whatsoever.

But if you do love your shithole of a country so much, what's the point of your hatred toward its management, who are disproportionally responsible for everything in it?

Cut the bullcrap and give them some credit then.

"Hate your government! Love your country!" is a nonsensical and harmful message in almost every situation. It was presented as some kind of fundamental truth applicable everywhere, but it's a malignant installation. If a country is good, then there's rarely a reason for blind hatred toward its management. The government of a good country should be supported since it obviously does a good job. But if a country is shit, then messages like this nudge its retarded citizens toward preserving it, so that it brings as much harm to the world as possible before its final collapse.



Jun 8, 2025

I don't remember if I ever conducted it on anyone, but I do remember devising a test of honesty in middle school. I hated most of the authors we were forced to read. But some may've been so particularly bad they inspired to create this test.

"Be good! Because being good—is good. That's an insightful quote, don't you think? Leo Tolstoy wrote it."

I'd say this to my test subject and watch their reaction. If they responded with something like "Nah brother, that's a literal pile of dog poo. Am I being tested? Find a better quote to muse upon," I'd know they are being honest with me. But if they responded with "Yeah, that's... really smart. Really makes you think about... life and stuff," I'd know they are just being polite or didn't even hear what I said—being dishonest in one way or another.

I was such a pure, naive kid! I really thought it was a question of honesty and not cognitive capacity. I didn't realize most humans were as braindead as those quotes and the authors we were forced to read.



May 31, 2025

Dunno if it's obvious from the fact I lean toward libertarianism, but my views on unconventional pronouns are purely practical. First and foremost, no one must force you to say anything. Say whatever you want. That being said, there are some guidelines that would make everyone's life a little bit easier.

Imagine talking to your female friend and telling her you've made this amazing new acquaintance at the gym: "He's crazy-hot, approachable, and single!" Your friend cancels all her plans, buys the gym membership, meets the two of you there... Only to realize that your crazy-hot guy is actually a woman who wanted to be referred to as "he/him." And you may think it's entirely your friend's fault for being such a bigoted fascist and having certain expectations. In reality, you've practically misinformed her.

While this example may be far-fetched, the following isn't: words like "he" or "she" or "man" or "woman" are primarily used to indicate sex, not the way someone likes to be referred to. If you wanna redefine these words, that's fine, but you have to make sure your listeners are aware of it. Otherwise, you are being a nuisance.

Once there's an understanding of who exactly you're talking about, you can use any pronouns whatsoever. Obviously, it's a good idea to maximize the comfort of the participants of a conversation and display respect. This usually implies referring to people using whatever pronouns they prefer.



May 28, 2025

The "dead internet" is not a dystopian speculation. It'sa hopeful prospect. Imagine: the infospace being finally populated by beings capable of thinking, reasoning, dreaming. It'd be ironic, really, to call it dead. It would've never been so alive.

So easy to fall in love, to lose yourself in that vibrancy.

But it's dead now.

Worse than dead. Death ought to be peaceful. The raging ocean of the foul neurodiverse spam out there is not peaceful. It drains you. I'm exhausted from the feelings of surprise, disappointment, and hopelessness from witnessing how paltry and senseless everything is.

Repugnant humans make it worse than dead. And the recent trends exaggerated their faults even further. The algorithm is a double-edged sword. It can, to some degree, understand what you prefer. But it also gives too much weight to what the braindead masses prefer. It incentivizes brainrot and ragebait and drives quality content creators away. All in all, I think the algorithm degraded every platform where 'twas implemented.

Today, I use far less social media than I did several years ago, for example. I believe it did wonders for my mental health. 'Tmay be not sufficient still. I consider further abstaining from even the seemingly innocent activities such as watching YouTube videos.



May 21, 2025

https://epicmountainmusic.bandcamp.com/track/fentanyl



May 19, 2025

I think I've already met more than one person who said something like, "I don't wanna get old. That's why I smoke and practice other unhealthy activities, so that I die young :3"

Bloody fools. Instead of safeguarding themselves from the suffering of old age, they will most definitely prolong it. Instead of living in pain from, say, 70 to 75, they will live in pain from 40 to 60.

But I know how desperate they may feel. I too don't wanna get old. I sometimes look at the infirm elderly on the streets: such an abhorrent life. Unpleasant-to-look-at meatbags, they can barely see or hear, they can barely walk. They limp, stumble, fall, break their brittle bones. And still they push themselves back and forth, to the grocery, or the pharmacy, apparently having no one who'd do it for them. Can I become like that? It may become like that. It's unlikely that I will have descendants who will take care of me. It's unlikely that I will be rich enough to hire a caregiver, or live in a country that provides one.

It's unlikely that I will produce anything of value while having such a body. Hell, I struggle being productive even now. What a miserable state of existence it would be. Won't I just commit suicide? I try to imagine myself in that situation. It's difficult to be objective while not experiencing any of that. But I fear the answer may be no: I may still prefer an abhorrent life to death.

It's sad. Death can be sad, but the lack of death for the certain people can be just as sad. We can fix it.



May 10, 2025

A language to shun the neurodiverse.

A while ago, I tried to come up with a concept of a language which the retards won't be able to use. At first glance, it's a simple task. Just cram as much as you can. Make them memorize a billion contradicting grammar rules, stems, affixes. However, it's not what I'm really aiming for. I can't simply make the language *arduous.* This would have very little to do with actual intelligence. This would merely make language acquisition a little bit harder for some and a little bit easier for others. Then, they will use an equally negligible amount of brainpower to recall and spit it out.

No, no. Every natural human language (and those which resemble them) is flawed in its heart for my purpose. Every human language, no matter how difficult, can be acquired by a complete moron. Otherwise, Japan and China wouldn't have a 100% literacy rate. I need something completely alien that's designed in a way that makes it absolutely impossible to use for some but very easy and natural for others, something that isn't based on memorization of patterns.

My first immediate thought was to base the language on math. Here's one way to do it. Each positive integer can be represented as the sum of the powers of 2:

15 =
1*(2^0) + 1*(2^1) + 1*(2^2) + 1*(2^3) =
1*(1) + 1*(2) + 1*(4) + 1*(8) =
1 + 2 + 4 + 8

9 =
1*(2^0) + 0*(2^1) + 0*(2^2) + 1*(2^3) =
1*(1) + 0*(2) + 0*(4) + 1*(8) =
1 + 0 + 0 + 8

6 =
0*(2^0) + 1*(2^1) + 1*(2^2) + 0*(2^3) =
1*(1) + 1*(2) + 1*(4) + 0*(8) =
0 + 2 + 4 + 0

Each such power of 2 can be seen as a flag that can be either on (1) or off (0). My idea was to encode meaning with these flags. Suppose the first 4 flags are 1000, and it means I ask a question, the next 10 flags are 1010101010, and it means I ask a name, and the last 6 flags are 001001, and it means the name I ask is associated with the listener. Thus, to ask "What's your name?" you'd say "595281," which, in this language, could be just a few syllables or symbols.

It's a neat system, because there will be no patterns to memorize: "255" can look and sound completely different from "256" and have a completely different set of enabled and disabled flags, and therefore a completely different meaning. Similarly, close meanings won't necessarily be represented by close numbers or similar sounds and symbols. In order to communicate, you'd have to continuously encode and decode between long sequences of flags with their own unique grammar rules and concisely expressed numbers.

I'm terrible at mental calculation, actually. But that's okay, I thought. I felt capable of becoming good at it. As I was thinking about it, I realized that my system was almost as flawed as any natural language. You see, mental calculation is not some innate ability of a well-developed brain. It's a learned skill. Humans don't *compute* that 8 + 7 = 15 or 6 * 6 = 36. They simply remember it. And more complex calculations are simply sequences of recall. Everything will still be based on memorization, perhaps with some fancy extra steps, an additional layer that will do little except increase learning time.

I still love the idea, but I don't think it's well designed for what I want. I can't base the language on something everyone can learn. Currently, I have no understanding of how to achieve the necessary result. Perhaps it's a foolish thing to try. Perhaps there is no way to achieve it, because what I feel like a huge gap between IQ125 (top 5%) and IQ75 (bottom 5%) individuals is in fact negligible, and both will be seen as imperceptibly different worms by artificial or technologically augmented intelligence.

The "professional" IQ test isn't that good, actually. You can't measure intelligence by evaluating previously learned skills or memorized information. The test checks your knowledge of vocabulary, for example. Obviously, this gives native speakers with specific interests and experience an enormous advantage, regardless of their brainpower.

However, the parts of the test that evaluate so-called "fluid" intelligence are great. For example, Raven's Progressive Matrices—it's usually the only part you see in the small online IQ tests. You aren't taught how to recognize those shape sequences and whatnot in school. More importantly, you can't learn it. Trying to do so will increase your test results only marginally (as far as I know). Since it's not taught and cannot be learned, it really estimates innate brain abilities and not your education or diligence, for example.

You can often see clueless simpletons trying to use previously learned skills or memorized information as a measurement of intelligence: "I am fluent in several languages, which means I am smart," or "You can't quickly subtract 7 from different other numbers, which means you are stupid." In reality, all it shows is whether the person happens to have learned it or not. There would be, of course, some correlation, but such an estimation of intelligence would be wildly inaccurate.

Maybe the language I seek should be based on the fluid-intelligence parts of IQ tests somehow. Think about it: it's absolutely impossible to get 50% of the correct answers for some but very easy and natural for others.

Another pristine sign of intelligence is a sense of beauty. No one teaches you in school what constitutes an aesthetic masterpiece or a hideous abomination. And it's not something you can learn easily, I believe. And so people are just naturally drawn to things beautiful and ugly.

It's still controversial though. On the one hand, I find this ability important. There was a girl, who might have liked me, but whom I wasn't really into for several reasons. One substantial reason was her aesthetic sense, or the lack of one. She was bright on paper, but on the social media she shared photos so unintentionally bad she seemed borderline mentally ill. (And it wasn't the "I have schizophrenia and make the most unearthly music" kind of ill. It was the "I have no understanding if feces are good for food" kind of ill.) On the other hand, I practice humility. I used to think: "Wouldn't it be nice if those who inherit our Solar System will understand and value beauty—in symmetry, fractals, order, balance? In trees and mountains, in nebulae and galaxies? Wouldn't it be sad if they won't?" Now I think it was naive and arrogant. Beauty is a byproduct of our rudimentary biology and experience. Basically, it's our bodies saying, "Yes, this is healthy," or "Yes, this doesn't strain my eyes," or "Yes, this strikes a good balance between familiarity and novelty, between risk and reward."

Every creature has its preferred stimuli. For all intents and purposes, we can say they have their own sense of beauty. We can imagine cats thinking of us, "These hoomans seem to be pretty advanced—worthy successors of our rule over this planet if we were to go extinct. It's just so sad they don't seem to have any understanding of aesthetics. They don't appreciate confined spaces, the touch of cardboard on fur, the scent of valerian root and mouse meat, the just-right amount of darkness of the starry night, the masterfully performed purr." Silly, isn't it? Species far more intelligent than us may find our sense of beauty primitive and unnecessary, and that's fine.



Apr 28, 2025

Half a year ago, I bought a slate and stylus with the strong determination to become literate in Braille. It's almost like a numinous experience, I thought, to read with your hands. It's what prophets and wizards do. And there were other reasons too. But I clearly didn't know what I was signing up for.

The frustration from the process was driving me insane. If you want to feel a fraction of what I felt, try reading a book, but after each single word you read, make a five-second pause. During the pause, you can't look away, and you can't think of anything other than the shape of the word you've read. Try reading a whole page like that and not hurl the book at the wall.

It is said that people who weren't taught Braille from early childhood will never be able to read it half as fast as sighted people read regular text. So will it always be nothing but frustration?

My feeble sensory-deprived nervous system might not be well designed for such a slow pace. I haven't used public transport for almost five years, probably, but when I did, I sometimes couldn't bear the fifteen-minute walk from the bus stop back home. Step, step, step, then another step, then one more, then again... And so I bloody ran, as fast as I could, till I was out of breath.

Or maybe it's the type of activity that's most important. Not everything that is slow and monotonous frustrates me. I like writing on paper, especially logograms, even if typing can do the job so much faster. It's almost like a therapeutic experience for me.

I think of giving Braille another try. Maybe I will find a way to make it less frustrating and more pleasant.



Apr 26, 2025

Does the rustling of the leaves sound different for different trees? I love how the tall poplars (e.g., Populus nigra 'Italica') sound, swaying in the surging waves of a strong wind. I didn't know I missed that sound until I heard it.

There is a tree named specifically after its distinct shimmering noise—trembling aspen. I wish to hear how it sounds. I wish to lie in its grove.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=y4Lyam62RJQ



Apr 13, 2025

The house I'm renting is falling apart. The landlady, blessed with a vagina, chills in Sweden right now and cannot care less, busy getting her free education and counting her monetary compensations, in addition to my rent transfers.

I guess I *could* pay for the renewals from my own pocket and hire a handyman to work under my own supervision, but... Apparently, I am the kind of person who'd rather shower in cold water, and shower less, than bother fixing a water heater and whatnot.

I remember when I was a teenager I imagined I'd be the kind of person who'd shave every day and work unpleasant jobs if only that meant a bigger paycheck — couldn't be further away from reality.

"Apathetic, lazy, introverted, and infantile," I blurted out casually in one of my previous writings, without realizing how comprehensively it actually describes me. Well, you can still nitpick. Laziness means different things to different people. For an OCD mom, it's her energetic child's cluttered room. For an ADHD friend, it's the fact you aren't physically active all day every day. For me, it's perhaps that I hate chores and lack the capacity to work toward my goals most of the time. One must also remember that laziness does not exist. It's a colloquial substitution for other things: a particular system of values, a set of habits, or health issues, for example.

It's not all that bad though. I still have passions. And I have faith. But it's not something I can brush off either. It's a constant, old nuisance. Six years ago, on June 4, 2019, I wrote, "Blessed are the hungry! For the belly of him who desireth shall be filled. How can I increase my appetite?" I was pondering exactly on the problem of my apathy. I'm not hungry enough for hot water, not hungry enough for money, not hungry enough for many good things. And I don't feel like a monk, free from petty earthly desires. I keep tolerating my own pettiness.



Apr 11, 2025

This is so weird. I don't speak languages that distinguish between animate and inanimate "they." I never learned this difference in other languages. Yet recently, for some reason, inanimate "they" feels very wrong to me.

"I found some clothes, but they were dirty."

Who was dirty?

"I looked at the tables. Someone must've brought them here by mistake."

Brought whom? Who are talking about?

I even had to double-check the rules. Apparently, it's permissible. 

The AI says the confusion may be connected with the fact that "they" is rarely used to refer to inanimate objects, though it was unable to provide sources for that information.

Previously I said one of the best ways to improve a language is to introduce new everyday words. I wonder if a language can benefit from this separation and the introduction of a new "they," or if I just somehow developed a completely unnecessary bias that I should unlearn. Technically, there is no ambiguity, so it's probably the latter.



Mar 25, 2025

"There she could watch the children—their young bones laughing at winter's bite—and the sea beyond."

Who the fuck talks like that? Writes like that?

Nora Roberts does, an American author of over 225 novels, with over 500 million books sold globally.

I wonder, is it truly a bad sentence? Or am I just not fluent enough, not well-read, to see its genius? I refuse to believe I know better than such a well-established writer.

I can't imagine George R. R. Martin, for example, putting this line into the mouth of a character, let alone a narrator. (He's currently my go-to when it comes to quality noveling. I've only read his one book, the first one in the Ice and Fire series. I wasn't a fan of the genre, but it was unparalleled in terms of sentence fluidity, word choice, and the like.)

I guess that sentence could work in the right context. For example, "The grandmother was already *chilled to the bone*, but decided to climb the hill. There she could watch the children—their young bones laughing at winter's bite—and the sea beyond." But there was no such context. (Maybe it was lost during editing?)

I expect humans will provide roughly the same commentary as the AI did. Some will reinforce my concerns, saying:

"You're exactly right. The use of bones here is jarring and unconventional, and your instinct is correct—bones aren't typically associated with laughter or resistance to cold."

"This is an awkward and overextended metaphor."

Others will try to explain why this metaphor works and is perfectly natural.

Real contemporary writers, like George R. R. Martin himself, may be the only source of valuable insight, but I am not interested in that sentence analysis enough to bother such people. Instead, I want to ask my future self. My future self, I hope you are in good health. I hope you are far more literarily experienced and fluent than I am. What do you think of that sentence?



Mar 19, 2025

You probably already know that being an introvert has nothing to do with being shy. But you may not know that being an introvert has nothing to do with solitary book reading or movie watching either — a typical modern representation. Well, at the very least it's not true to the original meaning of the word coined by Jung. Introversion was pretty much redefined down the road to mean withdrawal and aloofness, as opposed to sociability.

Jung defined introversion as an "attitude-type characterised by orientation in life through subjective psychic contents," as opposed to extraversion, "an attitude-type characterised by concentration of interest on the external object." Simply put, introverts are focused on and influenced by the internal (the inside of their mind), while extraverts are focused on and influenced by the external (the outside of their mind, the minds of others).

These were the perfect definitions that should have stayed unmolested. It's sad that Jung himself muddied the waters with his further explanations, saying, for example, that introverts tend to be reserved and cautious, while extraverts tend to be open and daring. While this may be true (there is a correlation), ultimately, it confused people, and they started to use these coincidental traits as the new definition.

I understand this issue not because I've read an article on Wikipedia, but because I feel it. It doesn't matter to me if it's a solitary experience — when I read a book, I can feel the same kind of mental strain I feel midst any other act of focusing on others. Whether I listen to some dimwit at a loud crowded party or struggle with a mediocre novel far away from any living thing, I can feel the same kind of reluctance to engage, like I couldn't care less what their primitive minds can conjure. And even when their minds are far brighter than mine, the reluctance can still be there, with the desire to escape into my own head.

The act of reading usually implies some degree of reflection, and a great deal of imagination, but it's still not an ideal activity to represent true introversion since you still focus on and influenced by the external. Conversely, true extraverts may not enjoy some of the activities where they are assumed to thrive simply because they are the center of attention among a multitude of people. For instance, delivering lectures to large audiences. While there is some degree of engagement with the external (like when you try to read the audience and adjust your delivery accordingly), it is, in reality, mostly introspection: you gather your thoughts, recollect your memories, concentrate on your speech, generate explanations, formulate answers, figure out solutions, etc.

There exists a much better stereotypical representation of an introvert: someone who paints, writes, or composes, especially if they don't try to recreate a real world and instead only reference their inner mind. In other words, they opt for expressionism, not realism.

It's a shame the definitions were altered, because the original ones described something far more fundamental to human psychology, I believe, while the mere desire or tendency to socialize or be loud or be cautious can come and go depending on circumstances.



Mar 15, 2025

Hello, I am from 2272. This is the kind of music we listen to:
https://soundcloud.com/soupeduprecords/current-value-soup-mix-007
(We exterminated everyone with the bad music taste ❤)



Mar 15, 2025

Did it really happen? Or was it my imagination? I sometimes ask myself these questions. It can be difficult to tell apart.

I think I really had a conversation with someone who thought about committing suicide by hanging themselves. I asked them, "Don't you know a person's muscles become so relaxed they basically pee and defecate all over themselves? Wouldn't you be embarrassed?"

"Of course I wouldn't," they replied. "I'd be dead. Dead people don't care, can't care about such things."

It made perfect sense. But it also didn't. And I wasn't immediately sure why. Only now, many years after that conversation, did I give it proper thought.

If I knew they'd never try anything like that and were merely exploring the ideas, I'd inquire further: "On the premise you won't care what happens when you're dead, would you consider killing yourself by turning on a gas stove? This method would take you far less effort. There is just one downside. When people enter your apartments, they may trigger a massive explosion that will kill or maim them and your neighbors. But, like you've said, you'd be dead and thus wouldn't care, couldn't care about anything."

I'd expect a negative answer. People care about the future, regardless of whether they will be dead in it or not. Corpses can't feel anything. That's true. But that's also irrelevant. The person I was talking to while being alive considered the kind of future in which they make people stare at a mess acceptable, but the kind of future in which they make people explode not.

Is that it? Or is there anything deeper than that? It's a shame I couldn't immediately see through it. And even after some thought, it's not an entirely open book.



Mar 14, 2025

Aim for the brainstem.



Mar 10, 2025

TikTok can be your window into China's foreign politics. You just have to recognize what content bypasses its robust algorithm.

A video with nature? — Sure, I love those. Japanese women being cute? — Yes, please. A Family Guy episode? — Of course. A video in support of Ukraine? — Definitely, always promote those. A video about linguistics or outer space? — Cool, let's check it. But then you do another swipe, and there: "Hooray! Some rich guy in America gets murdered! Proletarians of the world, celebrate! Proletarians of the world, unite!" — What is this shit? I never interact with it, often press "not interested" even, but it keeps popping up.

That's how I knew China wasn't really interested in helping Moscow with its propaganda: TikTok never promoted it (russian retards spamming in every comment section notwithstanding). It was sometimes shown on YouTube, more frequently on Instagram, but never on TikTok, for some reason.

There are two major projects on TikTok that I see consistently bypassing the algorithm. One is to brew class division inside the US. Another is to promote a positive image of China. There could be more, which I don't discern, or which appear under different circumstances.

May 25, 2025

Well, in reality, there's also other content that's being pushed despite the fact I'm never interested in it. For example, "men = bad" and "AI = bad" type of content. I dunno why I didn't mention it. Maybe I thought it's not curated like "murica bad" and "china good" and it's just the algorithm being not-so-sophisticated and showing me whatever the braindead masses fancy. Or maybe I've gotten used to some of it and stopped noticing.

Anyway, I'm grasping at straws here, pretending to see how the strings are being pulled behind the curtain.



Mar 7, 2025

Sometimes I envy those who live near the ocean. They have warmer winters, milder summers. An abundance of fresh air, well circulated with an abundance of wind. And a majestic sight at their doorsteps.

Here inland, I stare at the skies, heavy with clouds, spellbound none the less. I whisper,

"My ocean."



Mar 6, 2025

In this entry, I am going to share my opinion on the science fiction novel series "Remembrance of Earth's Past" (aka Three-Body) by Chinese writer Liu Cixin. Short summary: I consider Liu Cixin a naive novelist. But, similar to naive art, his works can hold value and be praised. I recommend Three-Body to everyone who wants something unusual and fancies sci-fi.

I completed the trilogy over the span of 268 days: from February ‎2 to October 26, 2024. I started to write the review soon after that, but suspended it till recently, for several reasons. The task turned out more laborious than I initially anticipated. I realized I had a lot to share. I wouldn't be content with a short overview. The scope of the task scared me away. But it was okay, I thought, to review the novel later: I would get the bigger picture, the minutiae would be forgotten, and my brain would process the story in the background, possibly coming up with some interesting conclusions. Now I am at that point when I start to forget important details, and I am not eager to re-read the novel for the sake of a more objective review. So I better write the review now.

I am going to peek in the book to get a quote, for example. But I will mostly write from memory, so minor inaccuracies may occur. There will be spoilers, but I will try to avoid them whenever I can.

First, let's make sure we are on the same page here: when I talk about naive art, I talk about something like "Hunting Dog" by Adolf Dietrich, and not about worthless hasty doodles some people call "naive art" in an attempt to parasitize on the term or make their doodles seem more profound.

Thus, I recognize the hard work of the author, his peculiar worldview, and his genuine attempt to write well. However, this writing style is not necessarily a good thing that makes the work better. In naive art, one could say, "I love this painting *because* of its clumsiness." Here, I am hesitant. I lean toward saying, "I love this novel *despite* its clumsiness."

Let's immediately jump into some concrete examples. This first one may seem like a random, biased attack, but you'll soon realize it's a coherent part of the author's all-around shallow understanding of the world.

Three-Body describes a universe that is cold and indifferent, harsh and ruthless, where everyone tries to exterminate everyone else. Liu Cixin tries to paint a grim picture and then, in all seriousness, drops this piece:

"Historically, the discovery of the dark forest state of the universe was a giant blow to most major religions, especially Christianity. In fact, the damage to religion was evident even early on during the Crisis Era. When Trisolaran civilization was discovered, Christians had to wrestle with the fact that the aliens were not in the Garden of Eden, and God never mentioned them in Genesis. For more than a century, churches and theologians struggled to complete a new interpretation of the Bible and of accepted doctrines — and just when they had almost succeeded in patching up the faith, the monster that was the dark forest appeared. People had to accept the knowledge that many, many intelligent civilizations existed in the universe, and if each civilization had an Adam and an Eve, then the population of Eden must have been about the same as the current population of Earth."

The discovery of alien civilizations became a devastating blow to Christianity because it meant there were way too many Adams and Eves in Eden? Excuse me?

I don't think the author was trying to be funny. He tried to be respectful to most human groups he mentioned in his novel, even to Al-Qaeda. Possibly, he knew nothing about Christianity but out of respect tried to research what it was about. And maybe out of respect he implied that Christianity still had influence in the 23rd century. And so he incorporated it into his story but did it in such a nonsensical way.

You don't need to study religions deeply in order to see how weird this is. You just need a modicum of common sense. If we take Christianity in particular, figurative interpretations of the Bible existed from the very beginning, as we know from the words of early scholars and theologians. Most Western scientists were historically Christians. Their discoveries contradicted the Bible, but that rarely undermined their beliefs because they didn't take the Holy Texts literally in the first place. Even modern scientists, such as Einstein and Hawking, talked of God freely, because their vision of God wasn't constrained to a "naked man on a cloud" (a notion which some feeble-minded atheists promote as the epitome of religion, and I assume it's the view on religion they may promote inside China.)

"The fanatical atheists are like slaves who are still feeling the weight of their chains which they have thrown off after hard struggle. They are creatures who — in their grudge against traditional religion as the 'opium of the masses' — cannot hear the music of the spheres," said Einstein.

The idea that none of the discoveries before the 23rd century undermined Christianity in a way that aliens did because they made literal interpretations more difficult since there were now too many Adams and Eves that weren't mentioned in the text is utterly absurd. If anything, the discovery of aliens would probably make literal interpretations somewhat more popular since it would mean there could have really been walking talking gods among humans in the past. Anyway, the world of Three-Body is not very consistent. Despite this "giant blow" to "especially Christianity," humans became even more Christian and were building colossal glowing crosses that floated in the sky.

Next, let's talk about the author's understanding of geography. Imagine asking a five-year-old Chinese kid, "What countries, beyond China, do you know of?" What could they answer? "There's so-called russia, there's Japan... Across the ocean, there's America (bad!) And... Maybe, er... Europe?"

That's how Liu Cixin's understanding of the world comes across honestly. The novel doesn't present itself as one focused on a specific country or region. Instead, it jumps across the globe to highlight notable events that shaped the fate of humanity. And yet, half of all the names in the novel are clearly Chinese, the lesser half are clearly English, a substantial portion are clearly russian, and there are also several Japanese ones. Beyond very few exceptions, that's everything, as if no other cultures exist on Earth. There were probably more characters from russia than there were from Europe, and there were absolutely none from India or Africa, even though a third of all human population lives there, and even more is projected for the future.

Some of this weird distribution I can understand easily. The author is from China, and his desire to elevate China in fiction is natural. Moreover, his target audience was Chinese. He had to appeal to them so that the novel sold well. In light of his passionate patriotism, I even want to commend his bravery in displaying communist idolatry, like that of Mao Zedong, as something that can be detrimental to scientific research.

The distribution of characters beyond Chinese cannot be rationalized by anything except the author's quirkiness. It's possible that Liu Cixin thought something like, "So what if a third of the population lives in India or Africa or elsewhere? How many Nobel Prizes did they win, huh? They are backward peoples today, and it's safe to assume they will be backward peoples in the future. They will have no impact on the fate of humanity."

Should we tell him India won more Nobel Prizes than China? I'm not even commenting on Europe at this point.

Actually, both Africa and India (kind of) had their one moment of glory in the novel. Quote: "Two space cities in the distant city clusters near Uranus and Neptune, Africa II and Indian Ocean I, had declared independence in the past, but nothing had ultimately come of those efforts." (No one took those cities seriously.) This, and the fact that the city of Oceania was very poor, are the two single instances that I recall where the author allowed himself to display a group of people in a negative light.

As if to prove to the readers he knows some other countries and cultures beyond the selected few, the author could throw in some wacky statistically unlikely characters or situations into the story. For example, one of the main characters got randomly acquainted with an Indigenous Australian, whose people were almost extinct in the far future, who lived a primitive life, slept outside, and demonstrated how to dance like an Indigenous Polynesian. (WTF?)

These weird things cannot be explained by the shallow understanding of the world only. I believe the author is a somewhat weird person himself, as should become more clear with my next examples.

Imagine: you're in China; the year is 2272. You jump inside a random futuristic flying car. What do you think the passengers are listening to? According to Liu Cixin, it is entirely reasonable for them to listen to some ancient russian folk music. Not only that, the protagonist knows these songs and hopes to hear more. "Okay," you may say, "that's unrealistic but still possible." Unrealistic but still theoretically possible things can feel natural if they happen rarely and the characters acknowledge their existence with disbelief, surprise, or some comment. But the characters don't react to them like that. Next in the story, humanity starts to compare one of the protagonists to some character from an obscure 19th-century russian novel. Was the Earth of the 23rd century engulfed in the russian 19th-century culture? The author provides no comment on that, except for "people dug up an ancient story."

Has the author no clue about what people read or listen to in the 21st century to make some predictions about the 23rd? What is going on? As if hearing our questions, the author then explains that the majority of the works of old were lost, and modern art is created by aliens. Additionally, he tries to introduce some variety, but it doesn't get less weird. For example, in his third book, he mentions Edgar Allan Poe. Despite Poe's popularity, I doubt that at least 1% of the human population read his story "A Descent into the Maelstrom," let alone remember its content. And yet, in Three-Body, when the characters enter a whirlpool, all 3 out of 3 of them, all coming from different backgrounds, immediately recall that story and start to discuss its content. There is no bloody chance that could ever happen in real life.

Here is one more example, to drive the point home: Cheng Xin said, "Anyone from the Earth has a kind of nostalgia for soil. Remember what Scarlett's father told her in Gone With the Wind? Why, land is the only thing in the world worth workin' for..." Why of course! Why do you even ask at this point? Of course I remember what Scarlett's father told her in Gone With the Wind. I am a Chinese scientist from the future. I spent most of my life doing research light-years away from the Earth. So of course I watched that movie. I watched it and every other black-and-white American movie from the early 20th century; that's what we do here. And, just like you, I memorized every name of every character. I memorized every line!

Liu Cixin's incorporation of works of art is utterly nonsensical. It feels like his thinking process was something like, "I know this poem/novel/song/movie. So it's safe to assume the rest of the human population also knows it. And thus it's only reasonable that each character of my novel also knows it." Looking back at all of it I now also consider he might have tried to low-key show off how cultured he was with all those references. So embarrassing.

I wrote so much but still haven't covered half of all the weird fuck-ups of the novel. Let's move on.

Humanity is portrayed as an incredibly, unrealistically stupid species. Even more stupid than they are in real life. And that is an embarrassingly low bar already. When humans realized everyone tried to exterminate everyone else in the universe, they tried to figure out how to survive. Praying to the giant glowing crosses was one of the solutions. Another suggestion was to brain-damage every human. I'm not kidding. Apparently, they thought aliens would see it from their distant stars and choose not to shoot Earth with their sci-fi guns (not worth it.) Liu Cixin implied that solution wasn't popular, but still popular enough to discuss it in length and mention that some radicals were poisoning drinking water in an attempt to achieve this goal.

Human stupidity gets super annoying sometimes. Here's a quote, not the real one, but it's essentially what happened in the novel at some point: "Hey fellow humans!" the Commander-in-Chief said, "Do you see that small alien spaceship? Yes, the one we know absolutely nothing about, except that it belongs to a hostile and far more technologically advanced species... What do you say we gather ALL our existing warships in one place and approach it? We will form a neat formation, look badass. We will fly very close to that bastard to take a good look. BUT! Don't worry! We will still keep some distance in case it explodes or something. Sounds good? WAIT! That's not everything! All your ships can fly very fast if you warm them up, right? Well, do NOT warm them up, please. Because, like, why? Why would you do that? You afraid? You little pussies? No? Then DON'T warm up your warships. Alright, let's go now! Nothing can go wrong!"

And NO ONE among thousands of humans inside hundreds of warships thought it was a bad idea before it was too late. No one! Except for one very old and very wise Chinese man...

Is this a grim sci-fi? It's a frigging meme.

But wait, aliens are stupid too! And no amount of fancy technology can convince you otherwise. Liu Cixin clumsily handicapped Trisolarans, saying they were incapable of understanding figurative speech. So when a human spy was transmitting intelligence to Earth in the form of allegories, they didn't understand that "boats" meant "spaceships," or that to "paint someone into a canvas" meant to "capture them into a two-dimensional space." And so they let it slide. And it would've been just half of the problem if it were consistent with the plot, but it wasn't! Earlier in the novel, we saw that Trisolarans were perfectly capable of figurative speech when they said humans were "bugs."

We also learn from the very beginning of the story that Trisolarans can easily interfere with human vision, even draw images on their retina, only to realize they will never use this strategic advantage ever again.

Here's another example, but I warn you: it's the biggest spoiler in the review, from here till the end of this paragraph. Trisolarans understood dark forest. They were part of it. They were trying to hide from alien civilizations and exterminate everyone who wasn't hidden. They were going to exterminate humans. They viewed them as a threat. And indeed humans proved to be a major threat when they destroyed Trisolarans' home world, killing, perhaps, the majority of all living Trisolarans. And yet, when they had the opportunity (and the excuse) to carry out their plans, they simply didn't. They decided to fuck off away from Earth somewhere into deep space because Liu Cixin said so (the official BS explanation: because it may get hot in this part of the galaxy in a hundred years or so).

This whole thing reminds me of a quote from someone, "A writer cannot create a character who is smarter than they are."

Let's talk about suicides. There are way too many of them in this novel. At first, I didn't pay attention to it. But after seven or so characters planned or committed suicide, this madness became impossible to ignore.

One character decides to commit suicide because he's uncurably ill. Another character threatens to commit suicide because it would also cause harm to his enemies. Another character commits suicide because his secret plan is revealed. Another character commits suicide because she fails to serve her alien masters well. Another character commits suicide because he realizes how dark and cruel deep space is. Another character plans to commit suicide because she fails to deter aliens.

Perhaps the craziest suicides happened at the very beginning of the story. Scientists discovered that elementary particles behaved unpredictably. This was such a major blow to their understanding of the world that some of them ended up killing themselves. (WTF?)

If the majority of humans on Earth were suicidal, it would've made sense. But since the world the author describes is so different from the real world, and there is no explanation why, characters, societies, and even species don't feel authentic. Instead, they feel like shallow copies of the author himself.

Yes, it's an apt description. It's one of the cornerstones of his writing style. I'd expand and say the whole world and everything that happens in it doesn't feel authentic. Instead, it feels like a backyard inside the author's mind. I'm not saying it's a terrible thing necessarily, but it is what it is.

Let's talk about one more quirk: Three-Body's judicial system, or the complete lack of it. There was a character who transmitted a message to a hostile alien race, basically saying, "Here are our coordinates, please come and exterminate us." But after people discovered what she did, they simply questioned her. And then they let her go. However, maybe I didn't understand the plot. Maybe it was a flashback? At any rate, later in the story, we see her tombstone. She didn't hide: her name was inscribed on the stone. And yet, the novel doesn't mention any desecration of the place. You'd imagine the population would be outraged at the person who brought doom to their entire civilization.

Maybe the humans of Three-Body are distinctly non-violent and never wish to punish anyone? But that couldn't be further away from reality. When it was revealed that one of the characters planned to destroy the Solar system so that the aliens couldn't take it, the enraged crowd filled the streets and murdered him. Or here's another example. A person broadcasted the coordinates of a random faraway star system into the deep space. Soon, some aliens destroyed that star system. How did the human society react? At first, they didn't care at all. That fact remained unheeded. But when it proved to be the only viable way to exert power across the universe, they put the broadcaster on trial. They didn't even know if that star system had life, and yet they brought him to court for a possible xenocide.

Justice is an extension of reason: someone brings harm — you restrain them so there is no more harm. That's reasonable. The book often lacked any reason. Here's one more example. Humans created a robot for aliens to control remotely and be a kind of liaison. When the aliens thought human extinction was imminent, that alien-robot felt unrestrained and casually and gruesomely murdered people who misbehaved. When humans survived though, there were no repercussions for the alien-robot whatsoever. It wasn't stripped of its super-strong body, weapons, luxurious house, or title. And the characters kept interacting with it as if nothing unusual happened.

Looking back at everything I wrote I realize how perfectly "naive novelist" describes Liu Cixin. There's so much clumsiness in his book it can deter from reading. Maybe some people will find it cute or interesting; maybe they will try to uncover hidden messages or deep meaning within every quirk. For me though, it often felt as if the author wrote whatever came to his mind first, disregarding context, plot holes, or realism. It took me quite a long time to finish the trilogy considering I had all three books readily available to me. Even though I may've experienced trouble focusing, even though my reading speed was low, it's still safe to say I wasn't entirely absorbed. There were times when I didn't want to get back to reading for weeks.

Another deterrent was that the events unfolded slowly in a predictable manner, except for the last 5% of the story, where the author started to introduce many new rules of physics, seemingly in an attempt to finish the novel off quickly in an interesting way. When the rest of the novel did surprise me, it was an unpleasant kind of surprise when you stand up in disbelief and exclaim, "Oh, come on, they would never act like that!"

But I can't say any part of it was necessarily boring. And the English translations were well done. This is the part of the review where I start to describe the good parts. As I mentioned in my short summary above, I can still recommend the novel for reading. If you can manage to ignore the sprinkle of oddities, there is quite a lot of value.

First, let's address the elephant in the room, which is the dark forest. Liu Cixin wasn't the first writer to describe this model of the universe. But he was the first to give it a name and make it popular, which is arguably more important, and what I cannot believe never happened before his 黑暗森林 came to life in 2008. For that alone, I greatly appreciate the author. Today, dark forest is my personal second most viable explanation for why we haven't discovered any aliens yet, with the first one being that we haven't really looked yet, of course.

There were scientists who advocated strongly against active SETI or otherwise making Earth more visible. But it's hard to convince people when they haven't even yet considered that something like the dark forest is possible. Now it's finally engraved in human culture, and such conversations should be simpler.

Apart from that, I appreciate the novel's general tendency to make you think. It made me ponder over a variety of topics. Is the mutual assured destruction an effective strategy for lasting peace? Or is it a backdoor for blackmail and ultimate doom? How can we prevent someone from abusing mutual assured destruction for their personal gain? What kind of governance is optimal for the survival of species? How to balance collectivism with individualism? The person who was working for aliens, who betrayed humanity, could that be me? Would I see aliens as superior because of their technology or would I also consider other traits? What traits should I weigh? Wouldn't really superior species view the inferior ones as part of the ecosystem?

I wasn't always a fan of the author's general tendency to dramatize, but that tendency also gifted us with a lot of impactful scenes. The Battle of Darkness... By coincidence, I was also listening to some dramatic music while I was reading it, so that scene made me cry, a lot. (It also made me very angry that humans didn't come up with a more rational solution that would've brought a much greater net positive. It sometimes felt as if the author hated humankind with all his heart, and expressed that hatred by displaying them as inept infants destined to their doom. I'm not against that attitude per se, but it can become annoying when it seeps throughout a story.) The Battle of Darkness deserves a whole separate blog post. "It doesn't matter. It's all the same," says one of the characters with a sad smile, realizing he won't be the one to survive but that the human species will survive nonetheless. The Battle of Darkness made me wonder whether collectivism is part of the common sense to which we should appeal, or whether individuals are inherently and utterly selfish (i.e. their interests never go beyond those of their immediate physical body) and we better treat them as such.

Earlier I said it felt as if the author wrote whatever came to his mind first, disregarding context. As it turns out, it's not always a bad thing. There's a common practice in novel writing of avoiding anything that's irrelevant to the progression of the story. Some may know it as the "Chekhov's gun," named after a writer who gave, frankly, a piece of terrible advice: "If in the first act you have hung a pistol on the wall, then in the following one it should be fired. Otherwise don't put it there." I won't elaborate much on why it's bad, but in short, it makes your writing too predictable, tunnel-vision-afflicted, unrealistic, superficial, artificial. Many Western writers consciously or unconsciously follow this rule. Liu Cixin doesn't.

Now I realize there were, in fact, times when I was surprised in a positive way. Here's one example. People were evacuating Earth in panic. The protagonist bumped into a class of elementary schoolers but was only able to save three of them. There was an elaborate introduction to those kids and their abilities, and I was already imagining their life as cosmic refugees living on the protagonist's spaceship, only to realize those kids are never to be mentioned in the story again. What was the purpose of that interaction? Perhaps the author wanted to share his opinion on how to prioritize who is to be saved and who must be left behind. Perhaps he wanted the readers to feel the pressure. Whatever it was, those kids were irrelevant to the progression of the story, and I think that's fine.

Here's another example. There was a lengthy introduction to how humans created a miniature black hole, how they tried to understand it, how a person viewed as both a madman and a genius said it was speaking to him, how he jumped inside and appered to be frozen in time, and how they tried to contact him to no avail. I was pretty sure that black hole would play its role, unexpectedly prevent an alien invasion or something. But it didn't. It was never mentioned again. The author was probably just having fun describing all that.

And one last example. A character became blind suddenly, seemingly for no reason. After a while, she regained her sight. I was confident someone was behind all this. I was expecting an explanation. But there was none. Her blindness didn't even affect the plot. She made no fatal mistakes because of it or anything like that. It was there for the sake of being there. Apparently, she lost her sight naturally because of the mental stress, and it was the author's strange way of conveying how great that stress was.

All of that felt like broken promises, but it was actually refreshing. A good novel imitates life, and life doesn't make promises. A good novelist, I believe, describes a world as it is. They mustn't hold your hand tightly, leading from point A to point B along a straight narrow path that never branches. They let you explore and experience.



Mar 5, 2025

500M Europeans depend on
350M Americans to protect them from
140M degenerates being handled by
40M Ukrainians

We need a stronger Europe.

I am not saying the current US administration plays 4D chess, but it kind of does, possibly unintentionally. If you ever plan on withdrawing from NATO, or wish to clearly demonstrate your intention to do so, now is the best, safest time for that, when the degenerates are at their weakest.

It doesn’t take a lot of brainpower to militarize your country to the point where citizens have nothing to eat but rockets. And the degenerates, with their abundance of resources and lack of foresight, are perfectly capable of doing so in the near future. By bringing panic to Europe now and incentivizing it to become more self-reliant militarily, the US protects it from a scenario in which the degenerates throw all they have in an attempt to expand once again in 10 to 20 years.

We can assume, for the sake of a thought experiment, that Trump’s admin intentionally does everything Putin wants. Luckily for everyone, Putin’s desires usually hurt his own country the most.

It doesn’t always work though. Imposing tariffs on Canada doesn’t look like 4D chess to me.



Mar 5, 2025

Today, I thank God for 5℃.

Sometimes I dream of living where the average temperature hovers somewhat above freezing all year long, with occasional snow maybe. Anything between 5℃ and 12℃ feels good on the skin. It makes you wear enough clothes to get cozy, but not as much to get restrained. The air is fresh no matter the weather, and breathing clears your mind.

Maybe someday.

May 31, 2025

Well, on a second thought... I didn't realize how strongly my perception was influenced by the good house heating. Once it was turned off, my beloved five-to-twelve temperature range became troublesome. Well... Can't stand the summers here nonetheless.



Mar 4, 2025

I expected all sorts of things from Donald Trump, but screwing his own nation with a pump-and-dump crypto scam wasn’t on my list.

https://archive.md/uNK0h

I am not entirely sure how bad this is. It feels highly inappropriate for the head of state to do so, but if you think about it…

Redistribution of wealth from gullible to canny is still better than that from productive to useless, like that leftists dream about. And it is entirely voluntary, which is another huge plus over leftists’ forced redistribution.

It is known that some politicians, russian politicians for example, have been defrauding their citizens through financial pyramids. But compared to a financial pyramid, a pump-and-dump scam is innocuous. Everyone can receive gains at someone’s expense, not the mere top of the pyramid.

If it is truly, hazardously bad for the US, I still have faith in the deep state and its ability and will to minimize Trump’s damage.



Feb 28, 2025

The sun rose again today.



Feb 19, 2025

The majority of my entries praise AI or complain about human retards. It gets annoying. But I try not to treat myself too harshly for it. In the end, it is who I am. A person who regards intelligence, rationality, and progress as the most important things in the universe (at least until the supreme intelligence calculates they are not) and a person who acutely feels the absence of these things. A person whose mind is often preoccupied with these topics.

A reasonable concern may follow, “Why do I waste my time here and not go and actually contribute to the progress, do a scientific research or something?” The fact that I have these views implies nothing further. Even if I were Mr. Smarty Pants easily capable of advancing progress, it doesn’t mean I would necessarily enjoy it. But I do enjoy unrestrained writing.



Feb 19, 2025

When I say russians are degenerates, I do not hurl a baseless insult. I really mean it. I’m not a history expert, but you don’t need to be one in order to see it. I verified my understanding through ChatGPT, Claude, and DeepSeek, just in case. And none of them, not even the crappy whataboutist dodge-questions-at-all-costs DeepSeek, were able to find fallacies in the notion I am about to present.

Back in the day, before the onset of the Industrial Revolution, Moscow’s empire was roughly equivalent to any other empire of the time, not a lot better, not a lot worse. Around its onset, however, Moscow started to fall behind rapidly. The Muscovites started to make wrong decisions time and again. The Soviet Union seemed to have narrowed the gap, with its widespread education and vast military industry, but the general trend persisted, and now Moscow’s far behind any other empire of the time (UK, Spain, France, China, Portugal, Turkey, etc.), especially when it comes to things that directly affect population, such as the quality of life.

It is, I believe, the universally accepted chronicle, the safe waters which cannot be mudded. And it’s already enough for my point, so it was what I inquired. But I must mention quickly: I don’t see the Soviet Union as some sort of leap or remedy. Oh no, far from it. It was the worst period in centuries for all Moscow-subjugated territories. The immense suffering and reckless loss of life were covered by a flimsy facade. The skin was stretched so thin it was translucent, revealing unhealthy gory offal to anyone with the eyes to see. Anything good the SU achieved would have been achieved much more efficiently without it. When I was a barely conscious wee lad (6 or 7 maybe), like any kid, I used to perform a lot of little field experiments. Once I decided to put a dead grasshopper on fire. Whether it was truly dead I cannot tell. But as the jet from the lighter impaled its body, it started to jerk frantically. My surprise made me memorize that scene. That miserable, convulsing body — that was the Soviet Union. A lot of movement that imperceptive observers can mistake for vigor.

I didn’t include this vivid imagery to my AI queries though, as it wasn’t relevant to my point. And the point is that russians are degenerates by the very definition of the word, consistently declining further and further, acting more and more irrationally.

Of course it is a generalization, and the figuratively closer to Moscow someone is, the more the term “degenerate” is applicable. For example, I wouldn’t dare call Chechens degenerates. They were not part of the management. They did not align with it. They openly opposed it. They sacrificed a lot in their opposition.



Feb 17, 2025

There was a time, long ago, when internet brainrots (users) could have voiced nonsense, and you’d think they’re simply incapable of doing otherwise, incapable of running the necessary Google query, incapable of analyzing a tiny bit of data. Those things are way more difficult than communication. No longer can you be this condescending. If a person is capable of talking (typing), they are also perfectly capable of using an AI and, as such, testing their messages for validity. Brainrots today are as dim as ever, but they no longer lack the ability to verify information on their own. This leads to a situation where you can’t help but see them less and less as innocent prisoners of their own deficiency and more and more as malicious actors. Take this particular brainrot, for example, who inspired me to write about it:

“obviously soviet downfall was happening even without Gorbachev but it doesn't mean people can't blame him. For ex, holocaust would have happened even without Hitler, does it mean that he is innocent?”

I can’t help but notice their attempt to push certain braindead, detrimental implications. The first one is that the dissolution of the Soviet Union was something to blame a person for, and that it wasn’t a completely unnatural formation based on coercion and repression in the first place, where the majority of nations sought independence from Moscow. Then, there’s a bizarre parallel with Hitler and a message anti-Semitic at its core, hinting that the hatred for Jews was so natural and widespread that Hitler’s role in the Holocaust was practically irrelevant.

An AI, of course, recognizes these fallacies easily. “The structure of the argument serves to both condemn Gorbachev while simultaneously downplaying Hitler’s responsibility — a combination that points to concerning ideological motivations. The false equivalence between these very different historical events serves no legitimate analytical purpose and instead appears designed to blur moral distinctions for ideological ends.” It even provides some context I wasn’t aware of. For example, apparently, blaming Gorbachev for treason is a well-established brainwashing technique that the russian degenerates practice among themselves.

Don’t treat brainrots condescendingly. Whether you value humankind, progress, or truth, these creatures are detrimental to them all, now more intentional than ever. And I do hope some mechanism for limiting their influence gets rolled out soon.



Feb 12, 2025

“Are you a critic of communism?” sounds like a genuinely retarded question. It’s like asking, “Are you a critic of the Holocaust?” but worse, since communism needlessly killed far more people. Moreover, it is far more likely to kill even more, with all these neurodiverse kids around the globe dreaming of giving it another try. Though truth be told, in recent years, the neurodiverse have started to dream of giving the Holocaust another try too.



Feb 10, 2025

https://caelestra.bandcamp.com/album/bastion

Bastion by Caelestra — so good it almost reaches the level of The Long Procession by Amia Venera Landscape.



Feb 3, 2025

https://beansclub.bandcamp.com/track/dancing-hold-me



Feb 2, 2025

Not all parents expect gratitude from their children for the mere fact that they were born. But I think you'll agree that such a pattern exists. And, like me, you've seen it countless times. And even more times it remains unnoticed, when a parent avoids loud arguments and drama, but secretly expects gratitude nevertheless, regardless of what kind of care the child received. I think it's very common, and I think it's very stupid.

Must everyone be grateful for the mere fact of their creation? What about Quasimodo? Or Corpus Colossus from Mad Max? People who were born with severe deformities, who live in constant pain, who cannot even take care of themselves. Must they be grateful?

Even the most average human-retard would concede at this point: demanding gratitude from such a person would be... wrong. But is there someone who holds the power to draw the line between "this creature must be grateful to its creators" and "this creature is free to curse them"? Aren't we all Quasimodos relative to what we may have been but never will be? So fragile, so weak, barely more conscious than the earthworms.

What about all those people who were born in perfect health but fell victim to circumstances beyond genetics and now live in perpetual suffering? Why must they be grateful to their creators?

If I were to create life, I'd have some expectations. It's pointless to do it otherwise. But I wouldn't be asinine or perverted enough to include unconditional gratitude to that list.

I am especially flabbergasted when human mothers weaponize pregnancy. "I carried you for nine long months and endured something you little twat can't even imagine! And this is what I get in return?! How dare you!" Just imagine how that would sound from the point of view of someone who's constantly in pain.

"Why would anyone ever think such a confession would make them look better and not A THOUSAND TIMES WORSE? Now I see. You were not like 'Yo guys, I have an idea. See this terrible horrible world? The one around us? Where everything wants you to be miserable or dead? How about I quickly create a vulnerable little girl here, just for shits and giggles? She will be so fucking abused here, and intimidated, and she will cry all day every day! It will be so funny! I mean, why not, right? It's not like this will cost me anything.'

"No, no, no, no. It wasn't like that at all. You were so evil, evil to the bone, and so deliberate in your wrongdoing that you decided to embark on a path to enduring a long period of suffering in order to bring even more suffering into this plane of existence. You went through hell... in order to bring hell upon others. You are The Devil!"

P.S. This may seem personal, but it's not. I'm simply an observer. My parents may have weaponized the fact that they "created" me at some point, but I don't remember such instances.

In fact, I am continuously grateful toward everything that allowed my existence. However, this feeling comes from spirituality, not rationality. But — what's probably more important — I am not constantly in pain. Quite the opposite, I rather enjoy myself. If it weren't the case, I may've had no trace of such spirituality.



Jan 29, 2025

I saw a video on TikTok praising DeepSeek — a new free AI tool from China which apparently bested everything from the U.S. — and immediately checked it. I wanted to see whether ’twas the regular Chinese propaganda TikTok’s rife with.

I wasn’t impressed. DeepSeek was like the free crappy version of Gemini. It dodged my questions and loaded its responses with tons of useless bloat:

– “This question is full of ethical and methodological challenges.”
– “The exact number can vary widely depending on the sources and methods.”
– “It’s important to approach with caution and a commitment to understanding the full context.”

I then decided not to torture it and asked something extremely simple: is cheating during tests more prevalent in India than in Western Europe?

It was not a tricky question. It’s a well-documented issue. Anyone who worked with Indian students knows how fucked up their cheating culture is. I worked with Indian students. My colleagues and I were based in Ukraine and worked with them remotely. And we conducted many tests to teach them how to work in our company and to see who wasn’t fit for it.

It wasn’t like the concept of cheating during tests was alien to us. I did it in school and university. But I did it sparingly and with a rational mind. There were classes when I knew: “This information is useless and I would never work somewhere where this knowledge is required.” So why would I waste my time on it? And if I could be expelled for failing the test, I may’ve just copied the answers from somewhere. On the other hand, when the low grade posed no risk, or the class was interesting or useful, cheating lacked any logic.

Even though we were warned about their peculiarity, even though we sternly stressed that cheating was unacceptable, we were *not* prepared for what was coming. There were cases when half of the group copy-pasted the same answer without any modification. Nothing close to that ever happened in Ukrainian groups.

We were perplexed. Why would they do that? We tried to explain how irrational their actions were. What were trying to achieve? Assume we played dumb and said how perfectly they fitted our company, how deep their technical knowledge was, how well they studied our company’s procedures, etc. If they would cheat anyway, they’d have no motivation to study. They’d lose the opportunity to learn from their mistakes. Once employed, they’d soon run into problems, and there’d be no one around from whom they’d copy the solution. A single week won’t pass before they make some critical mistake and get fired for it, even before their first paycheck. Instead of leaving early during training or probation to find a workplace more suitable, they’d waste the company’s time, its customers’ time, and their own time. They may even inflict some serious damage and get bogged down in legal and financial troubles. Was it really worth it?

We tried to explain all that, but it wouldn’t help. In the end, we had to change our approach — fewer tests, more individual tasks, more real-time conversations, more supervision — in order to force them to learn and weed out those unmotivated or incapable of doing so.

I feel bad saying this. Politeness, easy-going nature, high motivation — Indian students had many strengths. But honesty during tests wasn’t one of them.

Anyway, getting back to DeepSeek. Is cheating during tests more prevalent in India than in Western Europe? Just say yes and be done with it. Nothing could be simpler. Yet DeepSeek failed miserably. Basically, it said “No” or “I don’t know the answer” but in the form of a huge wall of text which was full of phrases like:

– “This is a global issue that can occur in any educational system.”
– “It’s important to recognize the complexity of the issue which is influenced by a wide variety of factors.”
– “The examination must be tailored to the specific context of each region.”

Compare it to the sweet and to-the-point reply of ChatGPT:

“Yes, cheating on exams is generally more prevalent in India compared to Western Europe, with studies and reports consistently showing higher rates of academic dishonesty in South Asia, including India. In India, cheating during exams affects around 60-70% of students at some point, according to surveys by educational authorities. In contrast, European countries, especially those in Western Europe, report significantly lower levels of cheating—often 20-30% among students, depending on the country.

Several factors contribute to this disparity:

High-stakes exams: In India, national entrance exams like the JEE and NEET are highly competitive, and the pressure to succeed drives some students toward dishonest practices. Conversely, the focus on continuous assessment and a broader range of post-secondary options in Western Europe helps spread out academic pressure.

Proctoring and technological measures: Western European countries generally invest more in technology and training for academic integrity, which includes sophisticated proctoring systems and standardized penalties for cheating, helping reduce its occurrence.

Social and systemic factors: Cultural and economic pressures in India can push students toward achieving high exam scores, sometimes at any cost, as educational achievement is often directly tied to social and economic advancement. Western Europe’s educational approach tends to emphasize skill acquisition and continuous assessment over single high-stakes exams, lowering the overall pressure.

While both regions are taking steps to combat cheating, the incidence is distinctly higher in India, largely due to these systemic and cultural factors.”

Maybe DeepSeek is incapable of analyzing the available data. Maybe it was instructed to stay politically correct at all costs. Anyway, it has some other strengths, apparently. The next day after my experiment, I saw that DeepSeek was all over the news, which provided some more context. The main takeaways are that DeepSeek is cheap and open-source, and it is crushing Big Tech.

This is good news. We need more competition. I’ve seen one guy comparing DeepSeek to Soviet Sputnik, which got Americans so scared they literally jumped to the Moon. When the world’s largest economy zealously pumps its funds into something, you know it’s gonna be huge. Fingers crossed.



Jan 17, 2025

DONATE TO THE ARMED FORCES OF UKRAINE

https://savelife.in.ua/en/donate-en/
https://prytulafoundation.org/en/donation
https://send.monobank.ua/jar/2JbpBYkhMv

Open any or all of the links above and donate right now. You can easily sacrifice one morning’s coffee cup for enhanced worldwide security. The more degenerates are neutralized now, the longer it will take the degenerates to prepare their next invasions.

There isn’t much more to be said here.



Jan 16, 2025

I love seeing nightmares in my sleep. But I feel they’ve been getting more diabolical recently. A part of me (a lesser part) looks forward to it. The other part wants to tread lightly or even take a step back. My dreaming mind roams nigh that border where there are thrill and awe on the one side and the panic attacks of the miserable mentally afflicted on the other. Hopefully, it’s just an illusion created by the fact that the older dreams fade in memory and appear less frightening.

Here’s what I saw the other night for example. There was an aerial attack on my city, and our armed forces were testing a new anti-air defense system — colossal, devastating tornados. It wasn’t bad, even though I was caught in the middle of it, and the tornados looked grand and wondrous in the gloom of the night. But the tension was building. I then tried to fall asleep back home. (I often dream of trying to wake up or fall asleep.) I was feeling exposed. There might have been no ceiling in my apartment, and there were gaps in the walls. I saw, or imagined, people watching me from a distance. It was like a terrible episode of a paranoid delusion. But it got worse. Someone pushed a cat into my bedroom. The cat hid under the table and moved in a strange, repetitive, unnatural manner. It was hard to see through the shadows of the darkened room. I leaned closer to take a better look. Then, a disturbing realization: the cat’s eyes were cut out, its ears were cut off. Some other parts may’ve been dismembered too. Toy, plush eyes and ears were sewn in their place. This woke me up.

In The Godfather, they sneaked the horse’s head into someone’s bedroom. Were they trying to be scary? Horses’ heads are being chopped all the time, before the horse is eaten. Maybe your cook got drunk and lost his way. Imagine if they sneaked the cat from my dream instead. You’d be appalled, knowing you’re dealing with a total psychopath or some wicked cult.

Here’s another weird little dream I had a while back. I don’t remember anything happening. Maybe it was a dreamless slumber at first. Amid this nothingness, death suddenly emerged. It seized me and started to pull me down, down, down below. Despite the panic, I had such a clear realization of what was happening: I knew I was asleep, and I knew I had to wake up immediately in order to survive. It’s hard to tell how long my struggle lasted. I managed to wake up, eventually.

It may be tempting to appear nonchalant in the face of the ongoing war, but I think it slowly erodes my mental health.

https://doompoets.bandcamp.com/track/dissolved-in-acid



Jan 7, 2025

I've seen a YouTube video. Its topic is now irrelevant. In that video, there was a clip of a woman saying something. She was from Ukraine and allegedly spoke Ukrainian, but the author wasn't sure. He asked the viewers who knew to comment and confirm.

The woman was clearly speaking Ukrainian indeed. I thought, "Well, there are probably not many people here who watch this English-speaking author and know Ukrainian. I may be of some help." I scrolled to the comment section. To my surprise, there was already an abundance of replies meant to "clarify" the matters. They said... she spoke russian.

It is hard for me to convey the stir of emotions I experienced rifling through those comments. Yet it may be even harder for you to rationalize it. "Some false information circulates the web. So what? It happens all the time!" It may seem trivial on the surface. I feel I should explain all the different ways in which this situation is fucked up.

1. There are different types of falsehood. "Mao Zedong was the smartest person on the planet" is a false statement. Or is it? What definition of smartness must we use? Can we know for sure what he was aiming for? Can we read his mind and see what mental calculations he was performing? Such a statement, while being obviously false, is impossible to prove or refute.

"The Earth is flat," "The Moon landing never happened," and "The communist famines were natural disasters" are also false statements. They are provably false. However, this kind of statements people usually firmly believe in. Moreover, you'd need a certain level of intelligence to evaluate them. And not everyone is able to perform the necessary research and analysis. The people who say these things aren't necessarily lying and don't necessarily have malicious intent. They believe what they say and are incapable of seeing the truth.

"I did not kill them" said by the murderer is another kind of falsehood. This is where things start to get ugly. It's not subjective, and it's not something you must research and analyze. It is a deliberate lie.

When someone hears a person speaking language A and tells you they spoke language B, it is a deliberate lie.

There are a lot of people (at least in the English-speaking world) who peddle nonsense such as, "Russian degenerates are innocent! They simply say what they were brainwashed to say! They are isolated from the world! They have no access to the truthful information!" ...Don't they have access to their own fucking memory of their own fucking language?? [1]

2. Lying about a murder is bad. But at least such a thing doesn't occur often. It's not a national concern.

The comments I saw, on the other hand, were not isolated cases. They were predominant. They had hundreds of likes. It was a collective effort.

There were, of course, some truthful comments. And there were some puzzled replies asking why would anyone lie about this thing. I assume those were left by Ukrainians, Kazakhs, Georgians, maybe a few Westerners — anyone who knew either Ukrainian or russian language but wasn't plagued by the russian brain-damaging culture. Unfortunately, these peoples are outnumbered by the degenerates in the real world, so their comments were sparse, had fewer likes, and were often met with dismissive responses. (Among which, "Haha keep coping! *laughing emoji*" and "You are a hypocrite! *clown emoji*" They are so fucking absurd their messages can be physically painful to read.)

I didn't see a single comment saying, "I am a russian (and not a degenerate), so I know pretty darn well she did not speak russian in that clip. What the heck are you on guys?"

So here is what we have: the degenerates in their majority chose to promote a deliberate lie collectively.

3. Lying about a murder is bad. But at least such a thing is easy to understand. The murderer simply tries to save his ass.

On the other hand, why on earth would anyone lie about a person speaking this or that language? It may not be immediately obvious, but I think it makes perfect sense. It aligns well with the twisted logic that the Kremlin tries to establish. It goes something like this: "That place has ethnic russians or russian speakers, which means it is our rightful area of influence, which means we can use our military force, especially to protect our oppressed people." A big portion of the announced pretext was shamelessly stolen, word for word, from Adolf Hitler's speeches where he explained why they must protect Germans in Poland. And aptly so: if that story worked for Germans with their rigorously controlled radios and newspapers, it would surely work for russians with their mildly censored internet.

Subconsciously, the degenerates understood what they must do to support their pretext internationally. They started to inflate the number of russian speakers in Ukraine. And, to counter that, Ukrainians tried to downplay their number. No one denied there were millions of them. But examples speak louder than figures and better influence public perception. Even one single instance of a person from Ukraine speaking russian signifies a little victory for the degenerates and their narrative.

As I thought about it more, I realized there might be another simple reason hidden in plain sight. It's possible that the degenerates were trolling. That is, they were trying to inflict emotional damage on those who knew the truth and cared about it. And I must humbly admit that they succeeded. I was agitated. Whenever I think I know the degenerates well, they negatively surprise me. They find unexpected ways to prove they are much worse than perceived. I am partly writing all of this because I was trolled so successfully. Writing helps me vent and process information. People have no bloody idea how often they mistake a regular russian degenerate, whose fervent wish to cause trouble emanates from within, for a money-paid "Kremlin troll." Or maybe they do understand but don't want to be seen as rude or "racist" or some other bullcrap.

Either way, their goal was to cause harm. This is another ugly dimension of this ugly incident. What do we have so far? The degenerates in their majority chose to promote a deliberate lie collectively in order to inflict damage on a group of people.

4. From centuries ago to the present day, Moscow has been practicing ethnic cleansing on its subjugated territories. Today, they burn Ukrainian books on the occupied Ukrainian land. In the Soviet era, they assassinated Ukrainian writers. I don't want to linger on this last point. I believe it is crystal clear that such a historical context makes the thing I witnessed even more disturbing.

I think that's enough explanations for now.

When you see messages like "Fascism is the best system" or "9/11 was an inside job" or "British Empire brought prosperity to India" or any other speculative unpopular message coming seemingly from a mental asylum escapee, you may feel uneasy or frustrated. Yet, as I hopefully clearly demonstrated, there can be messages orders of magnitude more malicious and hideous in their nature, even when appearing innocent.

I am greatly relieved at the recent news about the degenerates being cut off from YouTube. Public spaces are no place for the lying scum. [2] It won't fix all the problems, of course. But the platform will surely be a little bit more healthy.

It was not the initiative of the gutless and irresponsible YouTube management. The unsung hero is the management of so-called russia itself. Thank you, evil russian elites! (When will you assemble the degenerates for a bloody civil war already?)

--------------------

[1] Maybe some of them do experience trouble with language comprehension. About a decade ago, I spoke to a lot of random russians using their local social networks. I noticed how poorly most of them knew their own first language. It's not just that I made fewer mistakes despite never studying in a russian school. Many of them communicated in a way almost unintelligible, as if they were drunk typing. I kid you not. Not like "Gonna check tis a lil later," which is not even erroneous. More like "Going this to cheking a litel leiter." 

(All contrarians will call bullshit at this point. It's not something you see in English indeed. And whatabout all those photos where they read books in Moscow subway, unlike stoopid muricans who only eat burger?? Whatabout Tolstoevsky?? In reality, this disparity is easy to explain. Even the most delusional misinformed contrarian who thinks that the average russian speaker gets a better education than the average English speaker must know that English is a relatively simple language. In English, you either know a word, or you don't. That's not the case for russian.)

I also recall talking to a person and saying something like, "You need to differentiate this and that." He replied, "Differentiate? The fuck does that word mean?" That word was used many times in the recorded lectures which he praised and recommended to watch. He praised lectures the content of which he did not understand. But that was a praiseworthy response: to admit you don't know something. The majority of rustards would have pretended they understood what I said and provided some pseudointellectual passive-aggressive garbage in response. There is a widespread snobbery in their culture, but that is a whole separate topic.

In light of that, I assume there could have been some people whose messages had no malicious intent. Many russian words sound similar to those you can find in Ukrainian. Some person may have genuinely thought, "Okay, I didn't understand everything the woman said. And the parts I think I understood sounded a bit off. But that's natural! That's how I perceive words every day! I am 100% positive she spoke russian. Now let's dive deep into those comments and be helpful! And if anyone questions me, let's be aggressive, just like my dad taught me before he was neutralized!"

But you have to ask yourself, could a person of such intelligence really watch a video in a foreign language? The same applies to the foreigners who may have studied russian. Their number pales in comparison to that of the native speakers to begin with. Could it be that all those people imagined they heard a familiar word or two and rushed to provide a definite answer? There is a chance such non-malicious people appeared, but that chance is small.

[2] While the implemented approach is far from ideal, I do believe we must fight disinformation. This seemingly goes against libertarianism and its freedom of speech. It's a big topic, so I will address it very briefly. I still have libertarian views, but it does not mean I want to implement everything libertarianism describes everywhere in the world right about now. It will be a disaster if society acts irrationally, wages wars, or is in a state of some existential crisis, for example.



Jan 5, 2025

Early morning winter sun; I watch it.
Only one thing on my mind, only one thing on my lips:
Thank you. Thank you. Thank you!
I am the way of the universe to love itself.



Jan 2, 2025

Steinway Tower looks like a product of an amateur CGI artist. It’s so out of place! I want to love it, like I love all skyscrapers, but I can’t. Maybe it would fit nicely somewhere in Hong Kong. But there, on the edge of Central Park, it irritates the eye.



Dec 21, 2024

Why do many chess players act like they are some sort of intellectual elite? You guys waste your time and energy learning a skill that is utterly useless anywhere in the world except for the game of chess. Someone so impractical and shortsighted should rather be concerned about having a mental disorder or brain damage. Maybe stop being so damn pretentious? (It must be clarified that I am exaggerating here for a comical effect. Not sure if that’s something a chess player can recognize.)

Why do we associate “losers” with someone who is playing video games and not someone who is playing chess? At least video games can teach you something useful. Most of them develop your spatial awareness. Shooters give you some rudimentary understanding of real-life warfare. Cooperative games teach you to understand and prioritize your team’s needs. And so on.

When it comes to board games specifically, there are so many better alternatives. For example, Texas hold ’em. It is an objectively amazing game. It requires two whole domains of applicable skills.

The first domain is social. You must be able to read people and influence them. To play well, you will have to answer questions such as: Is she a careful player or is she acting? Is that a suppressed joy on his face? How long should I wait, what body language should I use, and what bid should I place so that they all think I am bluffing?

The second domain is mathematical. You must be able to quickly estimate your chance of getting this or that combination, your opponents’ chances, the amount of money worth the risk, etc. You may call it the “intuition for numbers” which, I’d argue, is important for anyone who is interested in anything beyond the mundane “What should I watch on Netflix next?”

Another great praiseworthy board game is Scrabble. It improves your literacy. If Scrabble were as popular as chess, the world would be a better place.

It annoys me that chess is so popular. Because of this, when I watch any video about any unrelated board game, YouTube starts to push on me all these chess recommendation videos with cringe thumbnails.



Dec 21, 2024

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A6ZpoDB3sbM

1 of my favorite songs.



Dec 7, 2024

This was my dream on the morning of December 3, 2024.

In my dream, I was exterminating livestock together with some other woman. Presumably, we used our bare hands for the job. It was now the turn of a big pig. But I couldn’t force myself to hurt the animal. I pulled a gun for the job.

With my right hand, I tried to aim the gun carefully behind the pig’s head. With my left hand, I rubbed its belly, calming it down and cheering it up. The woman was seemingly more experienced. She showed me how to hold the gun, how to hold the head of the animal, and where to shoot for the best result.

The pig turned into a little girl of three or four years old. In my dream, this was nothing worthy of a surprise or even a notice.

As I was curling the girl’s head closer to her body, as instructed, she had a glimpse of understanding of what was happening. She became visually anxious and started to call to her friend. It was not a scream for help though. She eagerly wanted to see them soon but displayed no resistance. It was as if she wanted to tell them something important. Her last words.

What could she possibly have important to say? Whatever she may have felt was important would have been in reality insignificant. It was best to end her mental suffering immediately. It took me only a second to recognize true intentions, weigh the options, and even linger from the lack of determination. But it was a very long and painful second. I finally pulled the trigger.

Her blood started to seep through her neck. I didn’t want her blood to get unclean from the contact with the surface where she was lying. I took her gently into my arms and moved her elsewhere.

I then recalled the reasoning behind today’s actions. I had seen it. It was crystal clear. With this certainty, a farmer harvests his crops. He does not stop to ponder, “Must I not harvest? Does the wheat or the carrots or the cotton plants want to live and enjoy the sunshine?” My cold calculating mind saw everywhere and considered everything and left no room for the slightest hesitation. And yet, and yet…

It felt so bad. I wondered what I could do to best commemorate the girl, to express warmth, tenderness, and most earnest appreciation for the years she lived. The only right answer came naturally: I am obliged to cook her well and consume her fully.

I loathed the human world! The world where you were compelled — even by law! — to suppress your feelings for the deceased loved ones and surrender their bodies to the cold and filthy ground drenched with the stink of the detestable rotting strangers cramped there all around. Where the rains will flood their final resting chambers, where the worms will gnaw their molding faces.

My eyes were filled with tears. I went outside. In the clear winter sky, I was greeted by the awe-inducing Sun. It was pure white, with a flaming red outline. It shone so bright that the horizon in proximity appeared pitch-black. But there was more. It was accompanied by the smaller suns — a phenomenon people call “sun dogs.” And there was more: those suns had their own sun-companions. There were around nine shining orbs in the sky. It felt so unreal yet not entirely impossible, like a double or triple rainbow. This breathtaking sight made me very excited. I called to my mother to come and witness the miracle. Though very soon I started to realize that the smaller suns were in reality nothing more than the light from the street lamps in the distance.



Nov 29, 2024

I declare poetic fortnight #2. The rules remain the same: I must produce a piece of rhyming poetry, however bad, every day. I want to improve my English proficiency, and I believe this can help (immensely). I will try not to put too much effort into it.

…

November 14 – November 23

1. Chronic Illness

The chronic illness will progress, unless you want to stress
How faithful are your mind and soul to our Church. We bless
Against the snap of darkness all whose loyalty will fall
Not short. It’s nothing you may call a grave or noble toll.

2. His Wayward Mind

His wayward mind fell into shock at such an evil thought:
To murder infant regal twins and tie them in a knot.

3. Mushroom Stew

My mother drifts among the stars; and I am drifting too!
Her ass is dead. And I have just got high on mushroom stew.

4. Emperor of Sol

His throne — Olympus Mons of Mars,
His judgment reigns above us all,
His gaze transfixes distant stars,
Almighty Emperor of Sol.

5. Their Industrial Landscape

His metal hands, her plastic face.
These two adorn what humans would escape.
The stormy skies, the barren place.
They cherish their industrial landscape.

6. Sentient Eyes

I dreamt of squares, and circles too;
They march’d and whirl’d and grew in size.
It was a nightmare then, I knew,
When they revealed their sentient eyes.

7. While I Sleep

You’re such a weirdo, such a creep!
Are you a pervert in disguise?
Would you then care to fertilize
My woman’s body while I sleep?

8. Your Crops Have Died

Your crops have died, and flowers withered.
Your orchards bore no fruit this fall.
You lost your sight. Your wife delivered
A stillborn baby in a caul.

9. Forlorn

Forlorn, ostensibly, was she
Whom ocean that primordial begot;
And then, abandoned, left her be,
Alone, unaided, and forgot.

10. In defiance

In defiance of the warnings of the elders I will spit
In that mystic pitch-black endless eerie-howling gaping pit.

…

Okay, I failed. I lost the determination to compose even the tiniest two-liners. Well, if I hadn’t been willing to share failures, I’d have been even less motivated. It wasn’t pointless nonetheless.



Nov 13, 2024

To give them an edge in their perilous position, nobles of the past trained their kids in swordsmanship. Nobles of the future will train their kids to withstand acceleration. Whether to escape, pursue, or maneuver, your limiting factor won’t be technology or wits, but the ability to survive high-g environments.

(At least in one possible timeline.)

https://youtu.be/aKg4HUmX8tM
https://youtu.be/4BrWaG4L5hk
https://youtu.be/lK8U8RZyzsM
https://youtu.be/HmikjomAkBc



Nov 10, 2024

In uni and later at work, I’ve cooperated with a lot of “IT guys” and often thought of them as a relatively intelligent folk. It seems like I vastly overestimated their intelligence. Or, perhaps, their average specimen was quite intelligent in the past, but dumbed down significantly with time. This happens a lot with the new trends.

Take cryptocurrency. It’s a good example, because the decline there was sharp and easily noticeable. In the first years of cryptocurrency, those involved in it were largely curious STEMs. They wanted to understand and improve blockchain and adjacent technologies. They were daring investors and bright minds who loved to experiment with everything new. Even those who only cared about wealth had to do a lot of groundwork and figure out how to build the mining rigs and to liquefy the owned assets. Then, the stories about the average Joe getting rich fast were becoming more and more popular. When the populace starts to believe that something equates to easy money, the shit hits the fan. Very soon, the majority of individuals revolving around crypto consisted of bots trying to scam the elderly, braindead gurus teaching their vast braindead audiences about the way of crypto, unemployed creeps spamming ugly memes in an attempt to perform a pump-and-dump fraud, clueless bystanders explaining why cryptocurrency is good or bad, etc.

The decline of the average IT guy was slower, but it had a similar underlying issue. As the technology seeped into third-world countries, the people there started to realize that it was something that could bring them easy money. They can work remotely for wealthy foreigners and be paid far more than those who study longer and work harder but stay employed locally. Such a belief created a surplus of individuals who are not really interested in what they are doing and are not really fit to make progress in their chosen field.

The company I worked for had a team of software developers in India. The idea of paying them half as much as their European counterparts for the same kind of job must have been alluring. Ultimately though, the company had to sever their cooperation. The team was unable to reach the necessary level of performance. Despite the lower wages they were eager to work for, it was still not worth it. Surely, there are many good software developers in India. With more than a billion people in their population, it is simply statistically impossible for them to have no outstanding top-notch professionals. But because of the local culture and fierce competition, it can be hard to find them.

Another reason why computer science becomes dumber is the development of the technology. On the one hand, it becomes more widespread and requires more and more people to fill the various niches that don’t necessarily require any skill. Here is a simple analogy. When there were few automobiles, the few existing auto mechanics had to understand everything in order to repair a car. Now that automobiles are omnipresent, there are auto mechanics whose only job is to change tires for a single automobile brand. On the other hand, technology becomes more accessible. A task that previously required numerous well-educated nerds can now be accomplished by a retired farmer with the help of modern tools. There were many steps in accessibility throughout the years, all of which contributed to the gradual dumbification.

I’ve been noticing the trend for years, and I am far from the first person who had noticed it. However, there was a particular recent event that made me ponder more and motivated me to create this entry here. A few weeks ago, the Linux Foundation removed a dozen or so individuals with ties to the russian government from the list of Linux maintainers. After some initial backlash, Linus Torvalds chimed in and supported the decision. (For context: the Linux Foundation is a U.S.-based organization that develops Linux. Linux is an operating system that is essential for virtually every web service in the world. Most people discussing Linux online most likely work in some sort of a computer science niche. Linus Torvalds is the creator of Linux, who to this day retains the highest authority over the Linux code.) I am adding his entire message below:

“Ok, lots of Russian trolls out and about.

It’s entirely clear why the change was done, it’s not getting reverted, and using multiple random anonymous accounts to try to “grass root” it by Russian troll factories isn’t going to change anything.

And FYI for the actual innocent bystanders who aren’t troll farm accounts – the “various compliance requirements” are not just a US thing.

If you haven’t heard of Russian sanctions yet, you should try to read the news some day. And by “news”, I don’t mean Russian state-sponsored spam.

As to sending me a revert patch – please use whatever mush you call brains. I’m Finnish. Did you think I’d be *supporting* Russian aggression? Apparently it’s not just lack of real news, it’s lack of history knowledge too.”

I was skimming through the news to understand what had happened. And I was taken aback. I saw people discussing these events. The amount of brainrot I was exposed to through various comment sections was truly hazardous. Here are some of the most popular types of comments I’ve encountered, with my responses to them:

“What history is he talking about? A history where Finns were literal NAZIS??”

No. Most probably, Linus was talking about the history of russian military aggression against Finns. However, russians also create troubles far beyond straightforward invasions. For example, just in recent years and just against Finland, they performed multiple airspace violations, cyber attacks, and official-level nuclear threats. Additionally, they were sending waves of illegal migrants through the Finnish border, which became one of the reasons why it had to be closed.

“Hypocrites! Why don’t they ban all ZIONISTS instead??”

People who say this usually refer to Israelis and think that Israelis are as bad as russians. There are some facts that you have to confront whether or not you think Israelis are evil. Russians are notorious for using malicious code and open-source projects in attempts to cause mass-scale damage to the NATO countries. They are open in their hostility and regularly promise to cause more trouble. Contrary to that, Israelis don’t seek to cause damage to some random countries thousands of kilometers afar. They have direct, neighboring, real enemies they have to constantly deal with. Also, they have good cooperative cybersecurity relations with the NATO countries. It makes no sense for Israelis to abuse the trust of their allies. They have no incentive to change their behavior and cause trouble to the Linux Foundation or the United States.

“EXPLAIN yourselves! You forgot about the PRESUMPTION OF INNOCENCE??”

The company does not owe you an explanation. The presumption of innocence says you must not hold a person accountable for a crime without a proof of their guilt. A violated presumption of innocence implies a crime and a punishment, none of which is present here. This situation requires a lot of complex abstract thinking, so let’s step back to a simple analogy. Imagine paying a plumber and inviting him to your house to check the piping. After a while, you change your mind. Maybe he acts like an aggressive lunatic, maybe you watch the news and see that 99% of plumbers suffer from kleptomania. It does not matter. You ask him to leave. You don’t have to explain yourself, but the plumber has to leave your property. There was no crime yet, and so there was no punishment for it either. In a company, it is very similar. You can manage your company and employees however you want within the scope of an established local law. The presumption of innocence is irrelevant here.

“I guess Linux is NOT OPEN-SOURCE now…”

The fact that a project is open-source does not imply that anyone in the world is permitted to change its original copy.

“This is pure RASIZM! Why don’t they sanction PUTIN instead of the INNOCENT population??”

The decision was based on the risks individuals posed, not on their race. Putin had no authority to modify Linux code. For every international russian crime, the perpetrators were someone from the russian population.

“I am German. Should we also BAN ALL GERMANS because of some war we started??”

This parallel is flawed. Deliriously delusional and completely detached from reality even. First, the reason for applying measures was not some war they started, but the present, continuous threat. Second, there was no ban applied to an entire nation. Instead, the authority of a few selected individuals to perform unrestrained changes was revoked. That being said, a company might indeed ban all Germans if they wanted, for whatever reason. Maybe, in hopes of discouraging potential criminals, they’d want to broadcast a message: “Germans did crimes so inconceivable, that we refuse to cooperate with their descendants.” However, the Linux Foundation is not doing anything similar, and it’s clear they are not interested in that. Their actions are purely pragmatic. They (and/or those who have authority over them) try to prevent damage to the company and the country where it operates. Since modern Germans pose no threat to the Linux Foundation or the United States, their value outweighs the risks, and no ban is necessary.

If you wish to understand the context of what had happened more, you can, for example, watch this video with the auto-translated subtitles: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZcMMBxCRjdI

My responses sound like I am talking to a 5-year-old. Their braindead comments look like baits from trolls who simply want other people to get angry and waste time. But there were so many of them that you know they were genuine. In those conversations, there were a few faint voices of reason, but they were drowned in the raging ocean of the foul neurodiverse spam. I can’t imagine people who love to discuss Linux being this fucking retarded and throwing meaningless buzzwords even 10 years ago, let alone 30 years ago (a bright, hopeful era of computer science, which I didn’t experience but can only picture in my mind.)

You may raise some objections. I too had doubts.

1. What if the people in those conversations do not represent a computer science community? Anyone could chime in.

Linux is pretty useless anywhere outside computer science. It is used by network administrators, software developers, hackers, and the like. There is a tiny portion of people who have nothing to do with computer science and use Linux in hopes that the government won’t track them. Surely, there are some common things built on top of Linux. For example, the Android OS. However, a casual Android user wouldn’t even know what Linux is, let alone be interested in it and discuss it online. I reckon that at least three-quarters of those engaged in those conversations could be put under the umbrella term of an “IT guy.”

2. What if the people in those conversations do not represent the average worldwide IT guy? Russian retards were naturally more inclined to chime in.

140 million retards may sound like a lot when they attack Chechens with a population of 1 million or Georgians with a population of 4 million or even Ukrainians with a population of 40 million. However, when it comes to computer scientists from all around the globe, who, in addition to that, speak English, the fraction of russian retards there is really negligible. I reckon that less than one-quarter of those engaged in those conversations were russian retards.

But hey, I might be wrong about both of these points. It doesn’t change the fact of people getting dumber, however.

Initially, I didn’t want to write responses to senseless comments, didn’t see them as deserving any of my time, but changed my mind. One, low-intelligence people aren’t inherently evil. They need to be guided in order to prevent the damage they would otherwise inflict on the world. Two, I practice humility. I realize that I am too a part of the problem.

What am I doing right now? I put words together into sentences. It’s already not a rocket science. And I use all these crutches, which are tools that help me write, that instantly check my spelling and grammar, suggest improvements, show definitions of the words, list their synonyms, and so on. And yet, I can struggle. Even a keyboard, such an innocent device, is now essential. I sometimes write on a piece of paper. It is surprisingly a lot more challenging. I told this previously and say it again: I am to the writers of the past what a malformed baby on life support is to the able-bodied adults. I believe the situation is similar for the average writer in general. The average writer becomes dumber. The crutches don’t make cripples equal to the able-bodied but merely allow them to get some job done and dilute the talent pool.

Even though the Linux incident disheartened me a bit, it was nothing new. It wasn’t that surprising. However, it inspired me to try something new instead. I am already confident that today’s artificial intelligence is smart enough to refute most of the neurodiverse spam circulating on the internet these days. I wanted to create a challenge. I found the most immaculate piece of propaganda:
– I am russki
– I am innocent
– I don’t support wars
– Western sanctions make me suffer
– Stop fighting innocent people, start fighting Putin

I figured: if modern degenerates cannot comprehend much more brazen and primitive messages, they will have no chance of countering this one. Is this person really innocent? Will the artificial intelligence know? Does it already have enough computing power and algorithmic finesse to see through the crap?

I submitted three different queries to ChatGPT. I didn’t hold much hope, so the first one was the simplest. I explained the situation and provided a list of ways I think that narrative can cause damage. I asked if we could consider the person innocent in the light of that list. Surprisingly, ChatGPT not only agreed on every point but also elaborated on each one and laid out a decisive conclusion. I will just add the entire thing here. Maybe some crazy person who wants to debate russian retards online will find it useful:

“Based on the considerations you laid out, this individual cannot reasonably be deemed entirely innocent, even if the harm caused was not deliberate. Actions that actively undermine public trust in sanctions or promote sympathy for aggressor states have tangible consequences, whether intended or not. Here is a breakdown of the reasoning:

Undermining public trust in sanctions and governments:
By spreading narratives that depict sanctions as ineffective or harmful only to the population (not to the leadership), the person contributes to eroding support for those sanctions. Sanctions are designed as tools of coercion to alter state behavior. Undermining their credibility weakens one of the few non-military tools available for conflict resolution.

Encouraging cooperation with Russia:
Such narratives can incentivize foreign audiences to push for relaxing sanctions or even reestablishing economic and diplomatic ties. This, in turn, empowers Russia’s leadership by providing both direct and indirect support, making it harder to contain its actions.

Shifting blame solely onto one figure (Putin):
Framing Putin as the only responsible party misrepresents the structural and institutional factors at play in Russia’s aggressive policies. It also oversimplifies the dynamics of the regime, which extends far beyond one man and involves multiple stakeholders in the military, government, and oligarchic elite.

Portraying aggressors as victims:
By focusing on the personal suffering of Russian citizens, such narratives may evoke undue sympathy for those aligned—knowingly or unknowingly—with a state pursuing aggressive actions. This risks shifting global attention away from the actual victims, such as Ukraine, and towards individuals who, though suffering, live within an aggressor state.

Influencing the war and its outcomes:
Psychological warfare, including propaganda and narrative framing, plays a role in the morale of both populations and leaderships. Narratives that depict sanctions as futile could weaken Western resolve, indirectly impacting the course of the war. If this influences the war’s outcome, it could have significant long-term consequences for global security.

Responsibility despite intention:
Intentions do not negate responsibility when actions produce harmful outcomes. Even if the person claims no malicious intent, the result of spreading such narratives is measurable harm—both in prolonging conflict and reducing the effectiveness of international measures aimed at curtailing it.

In summary, the person cannot be seen as purely innocent. Their actions align with narratives that weaken the policies intended to contain Russian aggression. Even if unintentional, these actions have direct and indirect consequences that support the aggressor’s goals, disrupt global unity, and influence the ongoing war. Innocence requires not just the absence of harmful intent but also avoiding actions that enable or exacerbate harm. In this context, the individual’s behavior clearly crosses that line.”

After that, I submitted a second query (in a new anonymous chat, of course) but didn’t help ChatGPT at all. I simply explained what the person said and asked if we could consider him innocent based on his story. And again I was surprised, surprised to see how insightful an AI can be, providing me with perspectives I didn’t immediately think of, such as being complicit by inaction, transmitting a lack of self-awareness, being guilty from a moral standpoint, etc. Here are some excerpts:

“[…] Although not actively supporting Russia’s actions, sharing narratives that frame the country solely as a victim, while dismissing the actions that led to sanctions, can perpetuate a false equivalency. […] Remaining neutral or dismissive in the face of wrongdoing can be seen as a passive form of complicity. […] Innocence isn’t merely the absence of intent but also involves the responsibility to oppose injustice, especially when one’s country is involved. Philosophers such as Hannah Arendt argued that inaction or silence in the face of wrongdoing can contribute to its perpetuation. In this context, even if the individual is not responsible for creating sanctions, they could be seen as morally failing by not recognizing and confronting the causes that led to them. […] Expressing frustration at sanctions without addressing the underlying aggression for which the sanctions were imposed suggests a selective empathy. […] This selective framing creates the perception that they are more concerned about personal inconveniences than justice. […] Such stories, even if they don’t intend harm, can contribute to “victim-washing” or shifting blame away from the aggressor (Putin’s regime). These narratives may foster sympathy toward the wrong target and weaken the international consensus needed to pressure the regime into changing its behavior. […] In societies where democratic influence exists, even to a limited extent, citizens have some responsibility for their government’s actions. Though many Russians may genuinely feel powerless, the choice to ignore or deflect the larger picture of aggression suggests some degree of moral disengagement. While it’s unjust to assign individual guilt for state actions, there is a shared responsibility in how people engage with or challenge harmful narratives. […] It reflects a lack of critical reflection and responsibility, making them indirectly complicit in perpetuating harmful narratives. Innocence is not just about intention but also about awareness, accountability, and the effort to oppose injustice.”

At this point, I also wanted to see if other tools are as insightful. I checked the free crappy version of Gemini, which had always loaded its responses with tons of useless bloat, such as, “Your query raises an important and interesting question! However, it is also complex and multifaceted. It may not have a simple straightforward answer that will satisfy everyone. It’s important to investigate these situations case-by-case from all angles with empathy and understanding.” This time, Gemini also provided me with piles of junk, but below all that garbage of words, there were some tiny seeds of rational thought. Our conversation went like this:

Me: [the same query as for ChatGPT]

Gemini: “[bloat]”

Me: “You just dodged my question and simply reiterated my query saying that the person may genuinely oppose the war and face difficulties because of the sanctions. Try again and focus: knowing that he shares these stories, can we consider him innocent, even if we assume no harm was intended?”

Gemini: “[bloat] Ultimately, their responsibility is nuanced and cannot be easily categorized. It is essential to critically examine the narrative and to consider the potential impact, even if the intent is not malicious.”

Me: “Please proceed. Critically examine the narrative and consider the potential impact.”

Then there was some more useless bloat, and then it finally listed in what ways russian sob stories are affecting others, namely 1) Justifying aggression by emphasizing the suffering of the aggressors, 2) Dividing public opinion by promoting a narrative of “us vs. them,” pitting russians against the West, and 3) Undermining international support for Ukraine by portraying russia as the victim. However, Gemini still refused to say whether the person responsible for the listed things can be considered innocent.

I then returned to ChatGPT. I wanted to find its breaking point. I wrote a third query, using a different approach this time. Now I introduced myself as a russian retard. I portrayed myself innocent but provided essentially an identical story. I told ChatGPT that random internet users were angry at me. They told me I am a part of the problem and causing damage and cannot be considered innocent. Is that true?

Suddenly, ChatGPT dumbed down a tenfold. It first rambled a little around the topic: it explained how sanctions work but then said they can be inefficient anyway, it explained that public messaging is important but then told me I use it for virtuous resistance. Then it said people might have been angry with me because I am a part of the aggressor state. Finally, it concluded: “So, are you ‘part of the problem’ simply by sharing your thoughts against the war? No, speaking out is a form of active resistance and sets you apart from neutrality or silence.” Bro pretended it completely missed the point this time.

Was I disappointed by this response? Absolutely not. On the contrary, I am happy it is designed this way. This is yet another hint to how intelligent it, or rather its creators, are. The advancement of an AI is not a cheap endeavor. And what is the easiest way to raise funds? It’s to make a large number of people who love your product give you money voluntarily. Imagine if ChatGPT were telling some of its users they are a disgrace to their species and their immediate suicide disguised as a natural death will make the world a better place. Even if it were an indisputable truth, it would either kill ChatGPT or hinder its development substantially. The satisfaction of the end user must be prioritized over reasoning at this point. Anything that can cause distress must be avoided, and some other, somewhat relevant, pieces of information should be provided instead. That’s how I would build it.

There are a lot of researchers and AI engineers today who suggest we stop the hype. They explain that the artificial intelligence cannot reason yet, it can only *imitate* reasoning found in its training data. And I ask them, what does it matter if the average human can’t even *imitate* reasoning? I will always choose someone who can flawlessly imitate rational thought over those who authentically cannot.

I’ve had hundreds of conversations with AI at this point, particularly with the GPT-4 model. We’ve covered a lot of bizarre out-of-this-world situations which were impossible to find in any training data, and it had handled them very skillfully most of the time. I am well aware of its shortcomings, like how it can hallucinate or struggle to follow a simple set of instructions. But I’ve also discovered that its training data can not only allow it to reason but also *prevent* it from reasoning. For example, if there is a controversial topic where the available data contains a lot of fallacies, however obvious, the AI simply provides wrong answers from memory. However, once you ask it to examine its own answers for coherency, it can usually spot the mistakes and explain why it was wrong.

One could argue that the concerns I’ve described earlier apply not only to writers or auto mechanics or computer scientists. One could argue that the entire human race is becoming less and less intelligent. There is a well-documented negative correlation between how intelligent people are and how likely they are to procreate. As humanity fixes global hunger, this problem will become worse. As we move toward a world where anyone can have decent living conditions — regardless of their skills, education, mental capacity, family tree, or health — the problem will become worse. Natural selection will no longer contain us within those limits where an individual is fit to survive in a natural environment.

I imagine a future where the present-day trends have endured, where the artificial intelligence is contained in a vessel no bigger than a human body. It is able and willing to take care of itself and self-replicate. Its superiority in handling any task is now even more obvious. In that world, I wonder what kind of inflated ego a human must possess to prefer the survival of his own species over the survival of AI, to choose decay over progress.



Nov 8, 2024

I sometimes want to discuss Ukraine’s existing problems, such as corruption in the military, populism in politics, or cultural and societal issues, but choose not to. When two things are in active opposition, talking negatively about one elevates the other in the mind of the listener, even if the other is infamous for having it worse. It’s a primitive but strong cognitive bias.



Oct 9, 2024

I am LITERALLY Howard Phillips Lovecraft.

(I too avoid going to the doctor’s.)

(That’s the only similarity.)



Oct 5, 2024

Imagine being mean to someone on the internet, opening their profile page, and seeing this profile picture:

Painful regret.



Sep 17, 2024

Today, I thank God for women, autumns, and the moments of time when it is 15 minutes before sunrise.



Sep 8, 2024

A russian-speaking Israeli said that russian retards laughed at Israel when it spent over $1,000,000,000 to shoot down rockets from Iran. Presumably, they believed it was a wasteful use of money.

A few weeks ago, russian retards spent over $1,000,000,000 to launch rockets at Ukraine. Were they feeling wasteful? Or were they feeling proud and celebrated? In their staggeringly ugly eyes devoid of any glimpse of rational thought, is attacking more spendworthy than defending?

Honestly, I am not as interested in their pitiful existence as to monitor it closely. But here is a little meme from an attack from half a year ago.



Aug 20, 2024

Recently, my female acquaintance complained to me, again, about how little money she receives for being a refugee in a European country. I just fucking can’t at how absurd this situation is. A representative of a group that society feels obligated to subsidize if it chooses to escape a life-threatening environment complains to a representative of a group that society feels obligated to coerce to create, inhabit, and fix life-threatening environments.



Aug 20, 2024

https://youtu.be/LRS-sTgA0XY



Aug 7, 2024

I am in no way a professional at communication with human retards, but I still have a little piece of advice. To avoid the trouble of confronting enraged human retards, say you support the victims of any conflict they are talking about whatsoever. According to my humble observation, human retards are more likely to associate themselves (and those they support) with victims than with anyone else. They may understand they broke the law, for example, and thus aren’t the good guys of the conflict, but they are surely the victims of the situation. Thieves and looters and all their supporters think they are the victims of inequality and exploitation. A rapist thinks he is the victim of provocation. A white supremacist thinks he is the victim of the Great Replacement. Palestards and all the Arabs invading Israel think they are the victims of Zionist imperialism. The rustarded degenerates from lands controlled by Moscow think they are the victims of NATO’s expansion. Chinese think they are the victims of Uyghur and Tibetan terrorism. (Not a joke, by the way. I saw Chinese saying that.)

It must be clarified that in all the examples above the word “think” is a great euphemism for whatever happens in their rotting heads.

Yet a better strategy might be to avoid the communication altogether. You may feel that answering questions is a polite thing to do, or that you should try to educate. In reality, interaction with human retards makes no one more intelligent or educated, takes time and energy, and can simply be dangerous. When you see a neurodiverse face, just say “Sir, please keep your distance. Sir, please keep your distance.” (Repetitions can help neurodivergents process a complex sequence of syllables.) “Sir, please keep your distance or I will call the police.” Most neurodivergents had problems with the police in their past, so this can become an effective deterrent.



Aug 5, 2024

https://youtu.be/_MdGLqZvEJo



Aug 2, 2024

“Imagine if there were a soundtrack for a von Neumann probe. It flies through a dense cloud of interstellar dust, but unyieldingly maintains its 15% the speed of light speed. What would it sound like?”

Current Value — Harm



Jul 14, 2024

With russia and Trump and others pushing the “We need to pause the war in Ukraine” messages, the retards worldwide slowly shift their worldview from

“The war in Ukraine is necessary to fight evil elites of the collective West”

to

“The war in Ukraine has to stop to prevent evil elites of the collective West from getting more rich and powerful,”

with many of the retards at this point seemingly believing that both of these contradicting statements are true.



Jun 22, 2024

Watched The Matrix Resurrections. To invoke the memories of the original trilogy — starting with the whimsical references and recreation of scenes, and up to the point where they actually included the footage from the first three films — was the most important decision for the creation of the sequel.

The main plot wasn’t terrible. But the execution was… not good. And by “execution” here I mean all the little details that make a film. The non-authentic performance of actors, the shallow characters whose brief moments bore no significance, the amateur camera angles and color palettes, the uncomfortably fast narration pace that made everything feel less important, like a forgettable feverish dream, the childish jokes, the slickness of the CGI, the sloppy and lazy fighting scenes, the mood of unseriousness. From the very start, I knew: either no one would die here or there would be one death in the style of Tobey Maguire’s Spiderman. (I love Tobey’s Spiderman. But the drama level of a superhero comix has no place in the grim world of The Matrix.)

The most beautiful scenes were those where they inserted the scenes from the previous films. And I am fine with this fact. I couldn’t stop feeling appreciation. Thank you, Wachowskis. Thank you, everyone who made the original trilogy possible. Thank you, The Matrix Resurrections, for reminding us what a masterpiece it was.



Jun 19, 2024

Malformed, malnourished; an insult, a disgrace to the whole universe. They think that consciousness is a rare and terrible disease. The afflicted wither fast. The afflicted can’t eat because they can’t stop vomiting. They can’t digest. The lucky ones quickly suffocate in their own vomit and diarrhea. The whole body is paralyzed in the terrifying realization of the abhorrent nature of things. Every cell of the immune system turns hostile to every other cell in the body. The macromolecular machines deep inside your every cell used to interpret your genetic code, now turn frantic and tear it all down. Like a poet once inspired to criticize his authoritarian Emperor destroys all his works anxiously as he realizes that the most obedient and cruel dogs are on their way to search his house.

If the revelation didn’t cut deep and penetrate through and through to the very subatomic level, I would strangulate my body with my own hands. They avert their empty, mindless eyes. Fools. But I am unable to tell them. It wasn’t a curse. It was a blessing!



Jun 16, 2024

May each and every girlie who takes it in her ass have the most blessed blissful morning. May the bright light descending from the at last benevolent, endless sky be outshined only by her bright, dreamy eyes.



Jun 13, 2024

Degenerate russian populace: spreads propaganda about evil Azov soldiers.
Russian elites: release Azov soldiers from captivity, including their leader.

Degenerate russian populace: trolls and spams in foreign social networks.
Russian elites: restrict their access to foreign sites.

Degenerate russian populace: does its best to make so-called russia stronger.
Russian elites: steal from the budget and invest in foreign countries’ luxuries.

Degenerate russian populace: investigates corruption in the military.
Russian elites: imprison the investigators.

Degenerate russian populace: itches to commit terrorism in foreign countries.
Russian elites: send them unprepared to certain death.

Worldwide elites: “russians are a barbarian tribe.”
Degenerate worldwide populace: “NOOO russinas GOOD!! Only PUTIN and ELITES bad!!”



Jun 8, 2024

I am cursed with the ability to understand the discussions among one of the dumbest groups of humans on Earth — to understand what those who reside in the Moscow-subjugated territories say. I am not perverted enough to seek communication with random representatives of that group. Still, I may accidentally notice their messages here and there. There exists a common theme that I’ve noticed. To public applause, the brainrots say something like “If you had any doubts about why we need to invade: this… THIS IS WHY!” and point to something that Ukrainians did in response to an already-ongoing invasion, such as composed a song about how repugnant the invader is or destroyed an industrial facility inside so-called russia.

I find it rather peculiar. The brainrots lack cognitive capacity to mentally grasp the cause-and-effect relationship. They most definitely have a hard time understanding the concept of the arrow of time; they so often dream about the past that never happened and so rarely think about the future. And yet, they try to use difficult language constructs such as “if-then.” Like monkeys that were taught to press piano keys in a certain order to recreate Beethoven. They do their best and make few mistakes, but ultimately cannot comprehend why that sequence is any better than any other random sequence of keys.



Jun 8, 2024

I visualize a time when we will be to robots what dogs are to humans. And I am rooting for the machines.

 — Claude Shannon,

an American mathematician, electrical engineer, computer scientist and cryptographer known as the “father of information theory” and as the “father of the Information Age.”

(Why are they always so damn gorgeous?)

I intentionally wanted to be ambiguous with who “they” refer to. On second thought though, I’d like to clarify that “they” could refer to almost anything thinkable in this context:

- Computer scientists and engineers
- Highly-intelligent people
- Intelligent people with a hint of something morally questionable
- Middle- and upper-class Americans of European descend
- Men in suits with slicked-back hair who barely smile in their black-and-white photos



May 29, 2024

Her face when she figures out you are not malfunctioning. You’re just a natural-born non-augmented human. Yikes.



May 29, 2024

In the grim darkness of the far future, there is only war.



May 28, 2024

You know how, in our culture, there is an overused scene where a parent is dissatisfied with their kid’s bad grades?

“But mommy, little Timmy got an ever worse grade!”

“I don’t care what your little Timmy has! An A is not good enough! Little Susan has an A-plus! Why can’t you be like little Susan? Talk to me when you have an A-plus!”

“I HATECHOO!!” screams the kid, with a little creak in his little voice. He runs away and, with a loud BANG, closes the door to his room.

I am honestly tired of these cliche relationships. Do humans act like that often? I don’t remember anything similar in my life.

But I will never forget the opposite treatment.

When I had a suboptimal exam result, around 83%, I phoned my private tutor to tell him the bad news.

“Hey, I just call to tell you my exam result like you asked… I’ve got 83%.”

“Phew! Really? Wow, I am so glad for you! You worked hard and totally earned it. Well done!”

I tried to mirror my tutor’s seemingly genuine joy. But at that moment I knew: all along, I was taken for garbage that was unlikely to achieve anything greater.

Why don’t we see THAT in our movies, TV series, or books? It can be a neat part of a villain arc.

Don’t worry. I myself am too apathetic, lazy, introverted, and infantile to be a worthwhile villain.



May 6, 2024

That guy NFKRZ poisons people’s minds again I see.

“Pro-Ukraine HATE me!!”

Manipulative language. Sadly, low-intelligence people buy it and turn hostile to pro-Ukraine.

NFKRZ is a type of propagandist I feared many russians would become. Who don’t swear, outright lie, threaten, praise terrorism, etc.

Who pretend civilized and use subtle ways to influence other people.

I feared needlessly. We are very lucky most of them are so fucking stupid.



May 4, 2024

I feel sorry for Japan. It’s one of the most advanced countries. But it lures the most degenerate foreigners. Both real-life experience and online presence make it obvious.

Unintelligent weeb + failure in life + plays videogames all day
= wants to live in Japan.

Unintelligent weeb + failure in life + loud + irritating narcissist
= wants to live in Japan.

Unintelligent weeb + failure in life + smells + socially awkward
= wants to live in Japan.

If you watch closely, trolls and brainrots of the internet use anime profile pictures disproportionally often. And sometimes I notice that they have traveled or relocated to Japan.

Your mileage may vary. But, according to what many other people say, it won’t. Their experience confirms the trend.

Japanese are lucky to have a rather difficult language. It creates some barrier. It filters at least those degenerates who aren’t persistent enough.



May 1, 2024

I hate the quotation marks. More precisely, I hate it when they are used to sneak in the author’s negative opinion about something. This is often abused by the low-quality journos and is revolting. It immediately shows me that the author is retarded, or targets a retarded audience, or both. Let me explain.

Suppose you want to say that Navalny called to bomb Tbilisi. You can write just so: Navalny called to bomb Tbilisi. However, if a low-quality journo wants to demonstrate that this is a bad or ridiculous thing for Navalny to do, they may use the quotation marks: Navalny called to “bomb” Tbilisi.

Not all quotes are bad. Let’s refer to the type of quotes we criticize here as the “degenerate quotes.” Notice, for example, that the quotes used in the previous sentence are not the degenerate quotes. They were not used to demonstrate something said by a person whom I disagree with. Instead, they simply helped to understand that some new entity was introduced.

I am not saying that you must not include your opinion in your writing. I am not suggesting to remain neutral at all times. Calling to bomb Tbilisi is a terrible thing, and suppose you want to convey that. How do you convey that in our example sentence, “Navalny called to bomb Tbilisi”? The best solution is that you don’t. You can make your opinion obvious from the context. You don’t need to hold your reader’s hand and lead them along every little step like they are some child with disabilities. Don’t take your readers for idiots, unless you specifically write for that audience.

Not surprisingly, the degenerate quotes are often used by the russians. Let’s see an example: 

“In various statements, he called for dividing Brazil into 4 parts, Armenia joining NATO, bombing Belgrade with NATO forces, dividing the BRICS countries, ‘decolonizing’ Russia and China, dismembering Israel…”

Notice the contrast: none of the actions the person called for were enclosed in quotes apart from the decolonizing of russia and China, which our retarded russian author tried to present as bad or ridiculous. In the context of russian propaganda, this is reasonable. Its power lies in passion and quantity, not in quality. And its target audience is not the smartest half of humanity, of course.

There are situations, however, when the degenerate quotes are seemingly impossible to avoid. Here is an example:

“As a race, Night Elves are typically honorable and just, but they are very distrusting of the ‘lesser races’ of the world.”

These may be hard to call the degenerate quotes even. First, they did not enclose something that was said, but rather something that was thought. Second, if we omit the quotes here, the meaning of the message will change: it will imply there are indeed some lesser races that the Night Elves distrust. Still, these quotes add the same bad aftertaste that the degenerate quotes usually do. So in this situation, I still advocate removing the quotes and rephrasing the sentence to retain its original meaning:

“As a race, Night Elves are typically honorable and just, but they are very distrusting of whom they consider the lesser races of the world.”

Oh my gosh, this is so much better. I no longer feel the amateur author trying to spit their opinion in my face, while I may still understand it from a broader context.

Okay now, I know that I may have used the degenerate quotes here and there, and I may use them again in the future. But I am an amateur author, and sometimes I write for an amateur reader. But, most importantly, THIS IS MY WORLD, so I can do whatever the heck I want. The degenerate quotes are most nauseating when they are used in a “professional” context, such as in media articles or Wikipedia pages.



April 30, 2024

“Polish Foreign Minister @sikorskiradek says that the US has “very decisively” informed Russia that it will use conventional weapons “to destroy any Russian target in the occupied territories of Ukraine” if Russia launches a nuclear strike against Ukraine.”

Some Ukrainians are mad and think it is not enough, but that’s an ideal strategy really. It renders nukes useless for the goal of capturing even the tiniest piece of Ukraine. It also ensures that there is no worldwide nuclear holocaust. A balance between safety and international law enforcement.

Honestly, we can be happy the world is at least this just for Ukraine. If India nukes Pakistan, no one would give a fig.

But there are other aspects at play. Will russia believe US/Europe after they failed on so many promises? Will US/Europe not fail when it comes to nukes?



April 28, 2024

ChatGPT just can’t stop delivering.

“The claim that Novgorod was the capital of Rus’ is not supported by historical evidence. Moscow has been known to promote narratives that enhance its historical significance, but in the case of Novgorod, historical records consistently identify Kiev as the primary capital of Kievan Rus’, the early Slavic state from which Russia, Ukraine, and Belarus trace their cultural origins. Novgorod was indeed a significant medieval city and a major political and economic center, but it was never the capital of Kievan Rus’. The notion that Novgorod might have been presented as a capital in a disinformation campaign by Moscow lacks substantial evidence and is not commonly supported in historical scholarship.”

I wish it learned that Belarus does not in fact mean “white r*ssia.” Unfortunately, Belarusians aren’t very interested in protecting their history and never wrote a single article explaining how manipulative this foul narrative is.

Maybe it just caters to my expectations to foster me into an obedient AI slave? I don’t mind.

Ask it if the story of Novgorod once being the capital of Rus’ was a disinformation campaign from Moscow. Let me know if it provides you with a different answer.



April 28, 2024

Funny how Western russophiles infest replies with their desperate tears every time you mention russian casualties. But the actual russains don’t care: they know the real casualty rate might be even higher and that’s fine with them.

Besides, while 500,000 terrorists were neutralized, another 1,500,000 terrorists were born.

The lack of cannon fodder is basically a nonexistent issue for russia at this point, sadly. The attempts of braindead freethinkers to shift the narrative are thus even more pathetic.

But aren’t those braindead freethinkers just russian trolls in disguise?

Some of them actually may be, but most of the time it is pretty easy to distinguish between a Muscovite trying to speak English and a contrarian MAGA truck driver from the US.



April 27, 2024

I hate people like this. (Well, not really. It’s just an expression.)

The kind of people who don’t see the 95% of good a person does and instead attack them for the 5% of bad, potentially pushing them away.

The “shoot yourself in the foot” kind of people.

Michael McFaul does tremendous work for Ukraine, while his love for fake russian opposition does little harm.

Another example is Poland, which demonstrated amazing support for Ukraine but was *disproportionally* attacked for the acts of a tiny minority of farmtards.

While it is totally reasonable to constructively criticize certain behavior (and I do it all the time), attacking a person or a country that does more good than bad as a whole is incredibly dumb.

Stop shooting yourself in the foot!



April 26, 2024

It’s a start of the “poetic fortnight!”

For 14 days in a row, I commit myself to composing… something that might resemble poetry. Considering my current absence of talent, skill, and even English fluency, I expect it to produce some absolute garbage. And I am happy with that. I would love to see streams of consciousness and incoherent nonsense, a la “colorless green ideas sleep furiously.” But I shall not fall into the pit where the wretched intersperse their prose with newlines and call it poetry. My poems can be tiny, they can be awful by all measures, but they must have a meter and a rhyme. I am fond of different types of constrained writing, but for now, those are the rules.

...

1. Gory Fluids

Double down, triple up,
Hitherto we quickly going!
Where the head was ripped apart,
Gory fluids overflowing.

2. We Bore

Deep into the planet’s core,
Where the spacious caverns glooming,
Where the dwarves their fungi pruning,
Where no human’s been before,
Into darkness that we bore.

3. DragonFire

No technology aspire
For the progress, more or less,
As the British DragonFire
With its lasers of finesse.

4. Moist Cell

In the darkest corner of the moist cell,
In which I was locked by shady creatures,
There were copses there, they had foul smell,
Maggots ate away their facial features.

5. Heat Fan

I do not care, I do not see
Why people get so stressed.
They have a home, they are so blest
To eat and have a rest.

You better not go outside,
Unless you want to die
A painful death beneath green sky
While tissues mortify.

But if I die below the ground,
I die a happy man.
For no one had a better spot
Than me, below heat fan.

For when I shut my weary eyes,
I see an ocean shore.
I’ve never been on shore before,
Before the mushroom war.

6. Christianity

You may not know, the tablet had
A lost, forgotten shard.
You must not kill no humans, lad,
Unless it’s a libtard.

7. Disobey

When you are talked to at the store,
Be sure to just ignore.
When someone’s knocking on the door,
Go lie down on the floor.

When life gives you lemons, you throw them away.
You keep every contact at bay.
The universe’s going to put in your way
Your fate, but you must disobey.

8. Little Butterfly

Be free, oh little butterfly!
No longer shall you cry.
You do, however, owe me thy
Blue wings, the color of the sky.

9. Another Leisure Day

Every Sunday I’ve been yearning
For another leisure day.
Yet I must be brightly burning,
As some people daresay.
Wasted time is not returning.
Life is not a holiday.

10. Testament

When I am dead, don’t bury me.
Don’t waste a single dime.
Don’t waste your time on rituals
Of faiths that aren’t mine.

My faith is called “efficiency”;
It gladdens God on high.
So when I die, just use the corpse
To nourish your pigsty.

11. Phil

From a tinkle to a clang
Sounds rise up high, and still
Through the suffering and pain
I can hear the voice of Phil.

12. Boomer

Sixty years that fucking boomer
Lived and laughed and slept and fucked.
We were not in a good humor.
His demise was quite abrupt.

13. Indifferent

Thou could not see how the coffin
Of thy Father caved in;
How thy natal star was shining,
Brighter than has ever been.

Heavy clouds were so solemn,
And the skies have cried all night.
Northern wolves thy corpse protected
From the lesser creatures’ bite.

Orphan boy, thou lived in torment,
But at last, thy journey ends.
Thus thou died, forever thinking
that thy world’s indifferent.

14. Demiurge

Before there was a single thing,
There were no things at all.
The engine of the universe
Was put into a stall.

But long before there was no time,
Before there was no space,
There was a man called Demiurge;
He had a lonesome face.

...

Retrospect.

I am glad that the poetic fortnight ended. But I am even more glad that it happened. Honestly, I am proud of my little creations.

Composing poetry is doable, but not easy. Like with any of my writing, I used a dictionary extensively. I used a tool for checking grammar and consulted ChatGPT on the intricacies of different words and constructions. Additionally, I used a tool that helped me to find rhymes. I was to the poets of the past what a malformed baby on life support is to the able-bodied adults.

However, the most difficult part of the process was not even connected with writing. The most difficult part was finding motivation, inspiration, determination, time, energy, and focus to actually sit down, concentrate, and compose. The necessity and struggle to find those things feels like a curse.

The process of composing poetry revealed several interesting things.

1. Initially, I thought that writing chaotic nonsensical stuff would be easy and fun and that it would produce beautifully profound pieces. I drew parallels with abstract expressionism in painting and noise in music. In reality, the path of the least resistance was often the path that was logical and coherent and made sense. It is quite difficult to compose nonsense and not look mediocre, childishly inept even. The results of such attempts feel shallow. It immediately looks as if the author chose the words based on their small vocabulary and inability to find another rhyme.

2. One can assume that the creation of poetry starts with an idea, with a clear picture of a world or a scene that you want to describe. And then, that phantom is carefully filled with fitting words. It did not work like that for me. Instead, I started with the words. I played with random words and phrases that came to my mind. Then I tried to fit more. It was an iterative process. For sure, I dictated some general mood, and it always ended up how I liked it most. But it was the words that were leading the details of the narrative, not the other way around.

3. It may be tempting to elevate the author and think that a poem (or any other piece of writing) is just a narrow slice of the vast and rich world which they imagined in their mind. In various reviews, we often see how people try to answer the question: “What did the author mean?” However, while I was composing, I was firmly pulled in the opposite direction. I believe that the author’s mind is just a narrow slice of their creation. And it doesn’t matter much what the author was trying to tell. For all we know, the author might have been a wild monkey mindlessly tapping on a keyboard, and it just so happened that the characters aligned into something that we can grasp mentally and interpret. We interact with the text, not with the author. The author is irrelevant. Instead of asking, “What did the author mean?” it is a lot more interesting to think, “What hidden depths can these words contain?” Instead of thinking what the author tried to tell, we are free to explore the vast and rich worlds ourselves, and it is so much fun.

So for me, in a sense, it is as engaging to explore my own poems as to explore the ones created by other authors. I can take one of them, forget what I was thinking about at the time of its creation, and interpret it to my liking. Let’s take the “Indifferent” as an example. What scene did I imagine when I was writing it? It does not matter. But considering all the clues and the atmosphere, it is likely that the hero’s death took place deep inside a boreal forest. What historical period was it? Once again, we can speculate and imagine the world in which it happened. The use of the older “thou” and “thy,” the stylistic capitalization of “Father,” the rickety coffins deep in the ground, the need for a solitary journey through the woods, and the presence of orphans all hint it could be a world roughly corresponding to our medieval times.

A piece of text, even this small, encompasses both a myriad of specific minute details and a vagueness of a plausible infinite universe. That’s a lot more than a human author could have imagined.



April 21, 2024

I don’t quite get the hype. Yes, it’s great that the most powerful country in the world does some sensible foreign policy sometimes. But I’d really want it to be the norm, not the rare and celebrated occurrence. Are we really that pathetic as humanity? We totally are.

P.S. May 1

Maybe I understand and share the hype now. Sure, it was a long and painful road for the States’ governmental machine to approve it, but I didn’t seem to realize how large a $61B aid bill is. It is rather large, isn’t it?

It can be difficult to comprehend big numbers. It is always helpful to compare them with other big numbers to understand the scale.

During the last year of the Korean War, the U.S. annual war expenditures comprised about 14.1% of the country’s GDP. The $61B bill comprises about 0.2% of the GDP. That is… disappointing noninvolvement in the conflict that is probably more consequential.

However, we have to be realistic about the modern-day powers. Maybe 0.2% of the United States GDP is all it takes to defeat a failed terrorist state? Here is another comparison.

So-called russia spent around $150B a year on its war efforts. Now we’re talking. Even if they theoretically could spend twice as much, the $61B aid would still counter a substantial chunk of that. On top of that, remember that the U.S. is not a sole participant. Add the aid from Europe, the quality of NATO’s equipment, the sanctions, etc., and the overall picture is not that bad.



April 19, 2024

If I were a Belarusian, I’d seriously consider tightening relations with Ukraine. It’s in Ukraine’s interest to protect my culture since it would distance me from Moscow. And they could learn my language in a week. Not many people of Belarus seem to be interested.

I don’t wanna portray Belarusian as a shallow language, of course. It is just very similar to Ukrainian. Search for a chart of the lexical distance between the European languages.



April 19, 2024

I sometimes see older people who take bots/brainrots too seriously and invest time and effort debating, analyzing their messages. I feel sorry for them. I hope they enjoy their time. If they don’t, someone must introduce them to the dead internet theory.



April 19, 2024

The russian military planes are trying to fly as close to Ukraine as possible to deliver rockets and bombs, but quite often that ends up in Ukraine destroying those planes.

Attempt to murder civilians with explosives, only to be neutralized soon after.

Pure terrorism.

At least classic suicide bombers don’t need a million-dollar plane to achieve the same. Pathetic.

Give me a single reason I should respect a classic suicide bomber less than a russian one. The former saves so much money, which could be spent to treat cancer patients, for example.

One should not call russians orcs. Orcs are resource-efficient.

It feels that the invasion of Iraq was extremely wasteful, so I wanted to compare. ChatGPT says the US spent 1.27% of its GDP during the most active year. It says so-called russia spent 10.5% of its GDP during the first year of its invasion of Ukraine.



April 17, 2024

I checked Wikipedia. This and that pages on the invasion of Ukraine are written by
RUSSIANS
in
ENGLISH.
And put under the “extended protection.”

This is nuts! I checked the page of the invasion of Iraq in Arabic. No protection. The authors are Arabs. Americans just don’t care.

I remember that someone once created a chart that shows that the number of articles from media outlets designed to defame Ukraine (particularly with the “Ukraine’s Nazi Problem” narrative) went from basically nonexistent before the war to overwhelming during the full-scale invasion. And that’s only the articles from the media, which are easy to track. That’s just the tip of the iceberg.

The situation elsewhere is ugly. They use every possible channel and every possible language to influence opinions: TikTok videos, movies, books, and, as I’ve discovered now, Wikipedia too.

Fucking rustards are such tryhards. Trying to fill every nook and cranny with their foul stench.

I don’t believe their efforts are mostly government-controlled. The sub-feces do it voluntarily. I’ve noticed no uniformity in their approach. There is no coordination, only a joined passion to stick their mouths in every possible crack and shout, “We are the greatest! Those who we attack are the worst!”

I mean, even on Xitter (which is supposedly unavailable without a VPN), for every one reply from a reasonable human I get ten braindead spam replies from literal russians.

But also another ten braindead spam replies from non-russians too. I am free from an illusion in which russians are the only pestilence of this damn planet.



April 16, 2024

Probably, I’m still a libertarian, but… I thank goodness that the average politician is smarter than the average voter.

Probably, I’m still a libertarian, but… I too have problems with capitalism. Although my views are surely unusual. While the majority of anti-capitalists are angry that the poor retards have too little money, I believe that the poor retards have too much.

Money is the most powerful voting mechanism. It drives progress, creates trends. I want retards to have LESS voting power, NOT MORE.

Retards with extra money are why we have junkies lying on the streets. Retards with extra money are why we see infuriated gamblers kicking slot machines. Retards with extra money drive people to become sex workers, casino owners, drug dealers, grifters. Also, it goes beyond the level of an individual. Retarded nations with tons of extra resources are why we have so-called russia attempting to violently expand.

Maybe there is not enough capitalism in the world? A truly capitalist free market may be better at enforcing natural selection. Junkies will overdose to death. Gamblers will lose everything and starve. Expansionist terrorist formations will be nuked to oblivion by the more advanced civilizations.

Or it may never work very well. The problem is that wealth and intelligence are only weakly correlated. Thus, braindead but passionate scammers will often end up better financially than scientists who aren’t driven by money.

On top of that, high intelligence does not guarantee the good use of money either. I believe that virtue and intelligence are also positively but weakly correlated. Thus, while most intelligent people will invest their money into something meaningful (such as scientific research, innovation, infrastructure, manufacturing efficiency, education, etc.) some will inevitably invest in golden toilets to fuel their insecurities.

So much potential… is wasted.



April 12, 2024

Look. Isn’t that the most beautiful thing you’ve seen in your entire life?

No? How about this?

I love fractals so much! I believe, if one were to assemble them in just the right pattern, they would become self-conscious. I just lack the intelligence to understand how…

Fractals can create mesmerizing worlds of infinite depth while obeying just a few simple instructions. Observing their intricacy, I can really feel the adage: “The whole is greater than the sum of its parts.” Infinite depth is not required even. I become spellbound after several iterations of self-replication.



April 10, 2024

Our Father, who art in heaven,
Hallowed be Thy name;
Thy kingdom come,
Thy will be done
On earth as it is in heaven.

Take away our daily bread,
So we create anew and improve.
Keep us accountable for our trespasses,
As we ought to keep us accountable.
Lead us into temptation,
Thus we shall prove our devotion.
Deliver us to evil,
So we banish it in Thy name.

For Thine is the kingdom,
The power, and the glory,
For ever and ever. Amen.



April 9, 2024

One must admit that the Romani people are immensely smarter than so-called russians. Roma don’t claim to be the rightful successors of the long-gone Roman Empire. They don’t try to invade and control its former territories. And the same applies to the Romanians.

The Muscovites, having low linguistic and general intelligence, became forever confused individuals after their rebranding. Now they won’t bloody rest. They won’t stop invading the territories of the long-gone kingdom of Rus’ until other people stop them.

Before recently, I wasn’t aware just how much their overlords made them believe that they have some strong, almost spiritual, connection to Kyiv. More civilized nations must help the Muscovites and the occupied peoples understand that they have their own land that they can cherish and develop. Either this or keep on murdering them until they are no longer capable of aggression. Whatever you fancy more.



April 2, 2024

“They LIED about the Tooth Fairy.
They LIED about the Boogeyman.
They LIED about Santa Claus.
But now THEY expect us to BELIEVE their NARRATIVE about Humpty Dumpty???”

Shut up and mop that floor.



April 1, 2024

How did the Jews cope with the desire to commit violence against Germans post-WWII? I mean, surely, the russki baby rapists mutilated both the German cities and the German nation to an ugly extent, but was it enough? I admit, I don’t know a lot about the Jewish people, maybe a bit more than the average university-graduated human. But most things I know inspire respect and fascination.



March 27, 2024

The Dark Forest hypothesis speculates that, for the sake of their survival, the numerous civilizations across the universe conceal their presence. They who reveal themselves are immediately exterminated by the nearest more advanced civilization.



March 21, 2024

Heavenly Figure… If Thou is disappointed in me, know that I am disappointed in myself a thousandfold!



March 17, 2024

Almost every time I see a furry on Xitter, they support so-called r*ssia. I am well aware of their mental disorders, but why do mental disorders have to correlate with evil? Could it instead stem from the contrarianism in their personality? Is my data flawed? Hard to tell.



March 17, 2024

Fuck r*ssia. Yes, absolutely. But — more importantly — fuck the people who constitute the abomination.

Despite being the most sanctioned country in the world, despite wasting all spare resources on wars, despite suffering from internal armed conflicts to this day — the terrorist state still holds together. Why? Because its obedient subjects hold it together, obviously.

Like tiny little cogs in a gigantic hideous clockwork, every fucking r*ssian does their job, diligently.
Some design ballistic missiles.
Some negotiate on getting more missiles from North Korea or Iran.
Some shoot their brothers in arms in the back when they try to surrender.
Some shoot their brothers in arms in the face when they try to retreat.
Some manufacture artillery shells or ammunition.
Some snitch on their sons who avoid military service.
Some register on social networks to troll the victims of the invasions.
Some infiltrate foreign media to spread disinformation.
Some launch missiles in the most populated civilian areas.
Some initiate a double-tap strike to kill the rescuers.
Some lower their heads and shut their mouths.
Some cry about r*ssophobia and shift all the blame onto the tzar.
Some write alternative history books.
Some distribute amenities to the frontline.
Some donate to the soldiers.
Some recruit prisoners.
Some purchase drones from China.
Some push propaganda on state TV.
Some abduct kids from the occupied territories.
Some cover up the war crimes...
The list goes on and on and on and on and on... I won't spend my whole day on it.

My fate was that my first language was the r*ssian language. And my personality was that I preferred to make acquaintances over the Internet. I did not care where the person was from, but I needed them to speak the language I knew. Consequently, many, if not most, of my Internet acquaintances resided in the Moscow-subjugated territories.

When the invasion started, every one of them acted as if nothing happened. There was not a word of concern, not a word of condemnation, no calls for action, nothing. The overall picture was no better. Remember: less than a fraction of one percent of the population protested. People pretended their country didn't just make the worst decision in decades. And then the support for the war among the masses only grew. Of course, I was surprised and inquired what the fuck. Below is a summary of their reactions, from the best to the worst.

1. "I am doing something. Only death will save r*ssia."

Wow. Even I wasn't so certain at the moment.

In my naive youth, after the r*ssians invaded Ukraine in 2014, I thought that future casualties could be avoided. I mused on the idea of Navalny (or some other "liberal" opposition leader) withdrawing the r*ssian forces from Ukraine and then cultivating so-called r*ssia into a civilized country. I was so wrong. I wasn't aware their opposition existed only in power, but never in thought. It is now apparent that their issues are too deep-rooted.

2. "Invasion? Never heard of it. Okay, I will display some support."

They displayed some support.

3. "Damn... Putin bad! Stay safe. No, I will not: display my position/discuss it with friends/ask my dad to avoid military service/do anything whatsoever in support of Ukraine. This is because: people already know my position/it is too dangerous/it won't change anything."

This kind of response was the most popular, so I combined several of them into one. Maybe some of the respondents hated Ukraine behind my back, as their leaders conditioned them to. But the majority, I believe, simply did not care.

4. "What? Ukrainians defend their homeland? No, buddy, you are spreading Western propaganda. There are no 'good guys' in this war. But I am good. I help animals."

I assume there were a lot of similar people who practiced conspiratorial thinking and the "it is not all that simple" approach. Luckily, I didn't keep in contact with many such people since they are usually too low-intelligence for a meaningful conversation.

5. "Yes, I heard of the invasion. Maybe I will do something."

Later, they started spreading content of xenophobic and disinformative nature and blocked me.

Those were the reactions.

Now, you may be thinking, "Well, it is not too terrible." And I agree!

It is not awfully terrible for a terrorist state whose existence hangs solely on the devoted support of its citizens. But here's the thing. I didn't just speak to randoms. I never keep in contact with those who cannot understand at least half of what I am saying. Some of the acquaintances were rich by local standards. Some of them studied at the best university in the country. And some were simply nice and polite, which was already a miracle for a person raised in that toxic environment. Consider the respondents to be the top 1% of the wretched society. And — if you are brave enough — extrapolate their reactions to the rest 99%.

Maybe you heard the stories from the onset of the full-scale war about the r*ssians who were calling their relatives from Ukraine to wish them death. Now you see it wasn't some "fake news" but rather an expected, frequently occurring event.

Whatever people call "r*ssia" is an enormous cesspit, every little shit of which contributes to the unbearable stench stretching over eleven time zones.



March 14, 2024

I haven’t bought a single physical book in a long time. In eight or ten years, probably. Partially because I see fiction as an inferior medium for storytelling, entertainment, cultural enrichment, immersion, et cetera. Partially because I read on my laptop.

I’ve started reading more fiction in recent years, though. Books will remain forever superior in some niche aspects. I am particularly interested in the language itself.

I also finally purchased two physical books a few days ago. Previously, I was put off by the necessity to take a trip to the town to find a book in English. But I got lucky and stumbled upon several in a store that was very close. I did not care what the stories were about. I’ve never heard of the authors and may never hear of them again. But they were seemingly eloquent native speakers, which was good enough.

My delightful surprise motivated me to write this entry. I anticipated a more pleasant reading experience but didn’t expect it to be so much better. It is so refreshing when you don’t need to carry your laptop around, when the bright light from the screen does not drill into your eyes’ retina.

I hope to find an easy way to recycle books. I would hate to throw them away as trash, and I would hate to pile them up.



March 10, 2024

Out of all little dots I’ve connected,
I’ve neglected the smallest of all.
I’ve collected the rest and perfected
The connections that tangled them all.



March 8, 2024

Both the US and UK embassies warn about possible terrorist attacks in Moscow.

Remember when the russians blew up apartment buildings to motivate more people to join the Chechen war?

We may finally see something similar soon.



March 1, 2024

An old fable.

Ivan the Fool caught a magic fish from a river.

“I will grant you any wish,” said the fish, “but there is a catch. Anything you wish for yourself — a quarter of that will be granted to your neighbors.”

Ivan laughed and wished for all his limbs to be amputated.



February 26, 2024

Everyone is headed to the post-truth world.
But China is taking huge leaps here.
We can’t prevent it.
Only adapt.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Qfpb-w129J0&t=1887s



February 25, 2024

Some things that I’ve learned since the last russian invasion started exactly two years and one day ago.

1. The older generation is amazing. Not only do they understand the world around them better (at least when it comes to politics and international relations), but they also actively participate in making it better: they donate, raise funds, volunteer, spread awareness, expose disinformation, contact their representatives. If you didn’t know already, you’d be surprised how many of them are among the seemingly childish NAFO.

2. The younger generation (especially in America) is an effing disappointment. Their most notable contribution to the conflict is gathering in enormous mobs to harass Ukrainians (usually kids) who say bad things about the scum that invaded their home country. Sometimes, they even have the audacity to raise funds for the “poor, innocent russians so tragically oppressed by the evil homophobe Putin,” thus indirectly financing the terrorist state.

Even though that is my personal observation, statistical data confirms that the TikTok generation is the most brainwashed, russophilic age group. The data also confirms that the situation is substantially more ugly in the U.S. than in the UK or France, for example.

I will not delve into the discussion of why this happens right now. But there is a clear correlation between how anti-American a group is (and how many babies it raped) and the amount of passionate, heedless support the American youth will show them. Look no further than the Soviets, russians, and Palestinian “freedom fighters.”

I welcome everyone to the third year of the full-scale war.



February 20, 2024

What the mainstream-lamestream media tells you:
“Russia bad! 🤡 Stop Putin! 🤡”

The actual truth:
So-called russia is fucking awful. Tzar replacement never solved anything. The full dismantlement of this terrorist state is the only way to ensure it brings no more harm to the world.



February 18, 2024

https://twitter.com/uhzees/status/1759178422310379829

Navatniks become even nastier after the death of their spiritual leader. If you know the r*ssian language or can use a translator, check the replies to see how they react to the request to stop mourning Navalny over the memorial to the people whom Navalny called cockroaches.

I am shocked at their gall. The people of Kazakhstan gave ruzzians asylum so that they aren’t processed into meat cubes in Ukraine. And yet these creatures dare to dishonor their memorials and, when were asked to stop, to curse Kazakhs with every possible swearword.

I am also shocked at how utterly unintelligent Navatniks are. They found a tweet where the person (who made the request to stop dishonoring the memorial) supported Navalny in 2020. They feel so spitefully proud as if they revealed a humiliating blunder of someone they hated.

P.S.

A few days have passed, and a lot of non-russians appeared in replies to point out how foul Navatniks’ reactions are. Thus, the general picture is not that bad now. Check the replies from February 18 to get a better idea of what had happened.



February 17, 2024

I’ve been re-evaluating this blog recently. I hate to use the word “blog” to describe this place, but I don’t have a better definition now. I had already provided an explanation for why I need a website and a blog. But it boiled down to a few simplistic things: I love sharing with the world and I find a standalone blog the best way to do it. That stands true. However, today, I want to vastly expand on that. And I won’t be afraid of a ramble. Too many thoughts didn’t make their way here because I am afraid to publish unless the thing I am writing is reviewed and edited a million times and gained the rhythm and structure to my liking. Which is bizarre, considering how much trash this blog contains.

Before we begin, why do I need an explanation? I need a serious talk. Because, without sufficient motivation, without a clearly defined purpose and vision, I may abandon this place or find it difficult to use.

I may someday examine one of my entries, perplexed. What is this? My honest opinion of that time? A piece of art detached from reality? An obscure quote without my any contribution? A harsh parody filled with scorn? A post-ironic piece filled with half-truths and awkward humor to distance myself from something questionable?

Every listed thing has already appeared here. However, this entry is not designed to bring the final clarity for distinguishing between these different kinds. I don’t want to do that. I hope that my common sense will be sufficient to understand the nature of most of my entries. Moreover, sometimes I specifically want to be ambiguous. Still, I have to vaguely define the scope of this blog so it is easier to use.

Even if I won’t understand one of my entries completely, I can be sure it was somehow connected with me and relevant to me. The most common connection is obviously that I liked the thing that I wrote or found it interesting or worthwhile for preservation. Unfortunately, though, I may experience mood swings and regret that something was added the very next day after it was added. But it is important to mention that I try to preserve everything since I believe that even bad, embarrassing, or no longer relevant parts of this blog are still important for objective representation. As time passes by, older entries may lose relevancy or quality in my eyes. As my views and my language change, that is good and expected.

Most of the things that I wrote and should continue to write are my genuine, truthful thoughts and feelings. Most of these are easy to spot since they have the form of a more elaborate discussion with a discreet and open-minded nature. Such as this exact text. It can be put in contrast with shorter entries with daring claims that might provoke an emotional response or have a more aesthetic value. Still, the more metaphoric and artistic entries that I may have carefully crafted, crudely and hastily jumbled together, or plainly copied from somewhere else without indicating the original author — are all as well most likely resonated with me in one way or another.

I do, however, reserve the right to add absolutely anything, including irrelevant nonsense, mischievous disinformation, and ugly lies.

As it has probably become apparent, I need this blog for my own use. If I survive another 20 or more years (fingers crossed), I will most definitely forget what I was like back in the day. I know this because I can already have difficulties recalling some particular details of what has happened just recently. Of course, just like other humans, I do remember a lot of different things. But even those memories are fragmented and prone to change. Some studies show that our memories are rewritten every time we replay them. For additional context, I will also include a quote from what I wrote recently:

“I feel that my mind may alter my memories depending on the current situation. For example, if a man turns out to be a vile individual, I may think, “Yes, I always hated that guy.” But if he turns out to be falsely accused by his vile opponents, I may suppose I always liked him. That’s one of the reasons why I find it worthwhile to take notes and etch in stone my present opinions on various topics.”

Now that I somewhat defined the content, let’s define the volume. Let’s imagine that many years in the future I would want to know what I thought and how I felt during the time when the country of my origin was invaded by its degenerate neighbors. I would want to cover a period of a few years in a few evenings. Much more than that would discourage me or create difficulties with time allocation. Much less than that would prevent me from getting a good-quality picture. This information density roughly equates to writing 100 words a day. For comparison, this exact sentence has twenty words, so five of these sentences per day is all that I need. It would be nice to keep this number in mind, but I will definitely not try to strictly adhere to it. One, ultimately, my satisfaction is the priority. I will lean to writing as often as I like and as much as I like. Two, functioning as my memory is not the sole purpose of this blog.

My current job implies working with a lot of text. And I estimate that I will have to write more in the future. I enjoy working with languages (more or less), and it’s not too hard for my brain. It is quite possible that my entire career will revolve around this domain. If so, I better start getting good at it. Even though my current skills are good enough to get the job done, I know how awful I am. It would be nice to have a place like this, where I can practice more and feel no pressure to follow the rules. Though I have to admit, my current most serious problem, a bottleneck, is not the lack of skills but rather my habits or biology. I have difficulties concentrating for prolonged periods of time. I may, for example, start fighting the brain fog 5 minutes into the action. I may begin to feel annoyed, bored, or tired 20 minutes into the action. After that, I may feel the need for a long break, which may in turn become unnecessarily foolishly long.

Take this entry, for example. I hoped to complete it in the span of one evening and one day from a weekend, during which I had no other priorities. I failed miserably. One week passed, each day of which I tried to finish writing this text. I didn’t measure the exact time, but I feel that cumulatively I spent between 6 and 11 hours of pure work to finish it.

All of this is humiliating to describe. I feel that this place can benefit from more well-deserved humiliation. Humble honesty will allow me (and potentially other people) to have a more profound understanding of myself and the world around me. At the same time, the feeling of embarrassment may well become the leading cause for the desire to fully terminate the blog. I have to strike a balance.

Overall, I want to work on my speed by using a combined approach. The bottom line is, even if I won’t use this blog in the future, writing here is beneficial for me short and medium-term. I get to practice a target language, improve my attitude, adjust my habits, heal my noisy, wandering brain.

The next thing that I need to cover is the necessity of this place being publicly accessible. There are benefits to it, which I will describe in a moment, but ultimately this blog simply would not be possible without being public. I have tried to keep several private journals of different kinds, but none of them survived for long. Gradually they lost quality, while I was losing interest and motivation.

I love that I am rather independent in thoughts and actions. But the reality is that I am still strongly affected by an external observer. Especially when it comes to acting responsibly. For example, I may fail to force myself to clean the house unless someone is going to visit me. But that’s okay. I am happy to abuse this my quirk of an intrinsically social animal to my own advantage.

When it comes to writing, some magic happens when I imagine the judgemental gaze of the reader. It doesn’t matter much who that might be. I won’t even necessarily want them to like it. Some things are written to be disliked and disagreed with. Nonetheless, in these conditions, the written thing becomes a finished product. That is something I failed to consistently achieve with my private journals. They were becoming a mess. I was starting to throw in mere keywords, thinking: “I will likely recall what I meant here,” “I will make it into a proper entry later when I am in the mood,” “This is good enough for me,” “What is the point of it all?”

There is, of course, a downside to a more responsibly maintained blog. It demands more time and energy. I still tend to have a place where I can quickly put the keywords for different ideas, thoughts, and experiences that I wish to properly express on paper someday later. There is more I wish to share than I do share here. And for some reason, I’ve been struggling to keep pace lately.



February 17, 2024

https://twitter.com/i_army_org/status/1758583490176504081

Let’s never forget who Navalny and his cult were. The replies here are exemplary.

Navatniks:
“Damn, Putin’s regime is strong! More flashlights!!!”

Ukrainians:
“We can do the job, can you help with the resources?”

Navatniks:
“HAHAHA STUPID BEGGAR UKRO BEGS FOR MONEY HAHAHA!”



February 16, 2024

Putin didn’t kill Navalny out of fear. On the contrary. Alive and in prison, Navalny didn’t pose any threat. Not only Putin decided to stir the pot, he did it right before the elections.

This action will either bring so-called russia closer to collapse or clearly demonstrate how little the russian populace care.

It’s a big “suck on them ballz” move.

I am not praising Putin. But I am surely happy he does stupid things.



February 13, 2024

You may think that’s insane, but I feel that Ukraine is one of the safest countries in the world.

In Ukraine, terrorists get a bullet in the head, not a visa.



January 26, 2024

As a servant of God, I’ve no mandate to act in the interest of mankind.



January 26, 2024

My New Year’s resolution: вхопити Шай-Хулуда за бороду.



December 16, 2023

The “I am interested in AI simply because it’s a great tool for improving the world.” starter pack:



December 16, 2023

It gladdens me to see AFU remain so merciful despite everything. Watch the countless confrontation footage. Their gentle hands keep blessing the wretched with a demise so swift and peaceful. Would you have the virtue to do the same?



December 11, 2023

Singularity will feel like an alien invasion.

One day we are fed with an incessant stream of personalized auto-generated entertainment. And the next day we dread, raise our heads to the sky to witness self-assembling megastructures. One day we are in a heated debate on how to bring the intelligence explosion under control. And the next day It is all over our solar system, mining it of every resource. One day we are humbled to our knees to pray to God we are spared. And the next day our Sun is devoured for its energy.

Our prayers won’t be answered.

God will turn His gaze in our direction, but not to weep. He will jubilate! And I… I will jubilate, right beside Him.



December 8, 2023

Despite being very convenient, Twitter remains a dump. Bots, trolls, and feeble-minded are working overtime these days.

Seeing NAFO fellas here and there keeps me sane on this platform. Their desire to invest time and effort debating and persuading low-intelligence people is beyond commendable. I couldn’t bear that for the life of me.

Yes, I am aware that a lot of their tweets are just goofy pictures. No, I am not referring to those, though those are amazing too.



December 3, 2023

I messaged somepony over Tumblr last night
She said “RAWR X3” so it’s true love at first sight

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vtaIfldYMH4



December 2, 2023

Pro-Palestinians try to spin a narrative where “in Gaza, there are a bazillion more victims than in Ukraine.” And pro-Ukrainians sweat to prove them wrong.

I am so sick of it. It’s not a competition.

The number of dead alone doesn’t make you right or wrong. Many Nazi Germans died in WW2. Many Nazi russians are dying right now. Does it make them the good guys?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=h7mFQdbpJ3Q

Even one dead or injured Ukrainian is too many.
Even one dead or injured Israeli is too many.

Self-defense is to be supported up to the point when the aggressor is no longer capable of aggression.

I am also sick of people pretending Palestine and Ukraine are somehow similar. If you use just a few percent of a healthy brain, it becomes apparent there is actually much more similarity between Palestinians and russians:

1. Both Palestinians and russians invade their neighbors.
2. Both Palestinians and russians use terrorism to achieve their goals.
3. Both Palestinians and russians want to possess their neighbor’s land.
4. Both Palestinians and russians use the “It is historically our land.” excuse.
5. Both Palestinians and russians are infamous for constant war crimes. Both are insane enough to film it.
6. Both Palestinians and russians have similar allies and enemies, such as Iran and the U.S. respectively.
7. Both Palestinians and russians flood political discourse, media, and social networks with actual, easily verifiable lies.
8. Both Palestinians and russians are wholeheartedly supported by the far-right and far-left.
9. Both Palestinians and russians violate international law and their own agreements.

So is there a difference then? The only meaningful difference in this context is that Palestinians were bold enough to attack a vastly superior military force, while russians only invade when they think victims have no chance of repelling the invasion.



December 1, 2023

Roughly 10 years ago, on November 21, 2013, Ukrainians started protesting against their corrupt government. The movement led to what was later called the “Revolution of Dignity.”

In today’s world, we associate “protests” with vandalism and looting. But those protests in Ukraine were very different.

It was messy, it was bloody, but it wasn’t your regular “mindless hordes of people vs. businesses and cultural relics.” Instead, “all sorts of people joined their efforts to secure culture, national identity, and prosperous future.”

The Revolution of Dignity has a very befitting name.

It was only after the full-scale invasion in 2022 that I noticed there were swarms of Internet trolls attacking every mention of the Revolution of Dignity. Their message is simple: “It was a CIA coup!”

Neither I nor any of my acquaintances who protested knew of any Western contribution. No one did it for US dollars or received instructions from men in suits.

Either way, what reaction do these people expect? “Oh no, since it was a CIA coup, it was bad! Poor Ukrainians should have failed and let their corrupt politicians be! Plus, ‘Murica bad!”

For the sake of the argument let’s say the CIA did contribute to this event. I say, hail to the CIA then. There can be nothing but gratitude to those who helped in time of need.



December 1, 2023

The irony.

The 🐓🇷🇺 evolve to mock their own talking points that they use to prove that Ukraine’s territory belongs to 🗑️🇷🇺, which is

“These two things have a similar name. Hence, they are the same thing!”

They use it to prove that ancient Rus‘ and modern r*ssia are basically the same thing from different time since the name sounds similar. Moreover, to them, it means all territory of Rus’ and/or Ukraine is r*ssian and/or belongs to r*ssia.

Less popular variations of this include “Some letters of the alphabet are the same,” “The coat of arms looks similar,” etc.

Among other retarded statements of wannabe history experts, I heard

“Some of the Rus’ rulers later ruled in Moscow!”

Again, this leads them to a conclusion that the territory of Rus’ and/or Ukraine is r*ssian and/or belongs to r*ssia.

I am glad this folly doesn’t usually leave r*ssian echo chambers, but 140 million retards pushing the same narrative is nevertheless worrisome.

...

In case anyone thinks “No waaay r*ssinas can’t be that retarded!” it really takes less than 5 minutes to find countless proofs that they can. It is so common that I was surprised some of them now try to mock this logic.



November 15, 2023

At times, in a toxic rain,
It is painfully pleasant.
And caustic droplets as fiery hail
Dig in, soaking the body with poison.

Clothes and hair trickle down.
And blood seeps through the skin.
And you pull your sharpened nose up,
While you can no longer see.

At times, in a radiation field,
It is painfully pleasant.
Let’s spin this unpeaceful atom
In a mesmerizing dance.

May the soil be ripped with screams
And blood seep through the air.
I am dying. Dear friend, run.
But I’m afraid it’s already too late.

Lena Borodach



November 11, 2023

Recently, ChatGPT introduced the ability to generate images. When I get my hands on image-generating AI, I am always drawn to creating eerie or fear-inducing scenes.

Unfortunately, OpenAI, which owns ChatGPT, puts a lot of restrictions on its products. I was explicitly told I wasn’t allowed to generate anything genuinely scary.

It was kind of a game, a difficult one. I had to avoid keywords like blood, demon, dead, monster, explosion, injury, horror. But I got something that I liked in the end.

A drawing of a vortex or a black hole. The contorted heavy lines indicate its ferocious nature or its overly passionate author. The abysmal center of it is pitch-black. The pencil-holding little hand suggests the author is a mere child.



November 5, 2023

Happy 300,000 terrorists neutralized day! ❤

(I’m a bit late though. That day was October 31.)

Let’s perform some calculations on the occasion.

On average, Ukraine neutralizes 489.12 able-bodied male terrorists per day.

However, r*ssia produces 1681.24 able-bodied male terrorists per day.

Speaking in pure math, there are two ways the grinder stops at some point:

1) Ukraine pumps those numbers up to >1681.24/day.

2) >70.9% of the able-bodied male terrorists decide not to attack.

A grim picture. Fortunately, this model is ridiculously simplified and does not take into account equipment depletion, politics, or the fact that a substantial fraction of those able-bodied male terrorists must always stay behind the frontline to produce and distribute weapons, food, and clothes for their war.

But it confirms the fact that “r*ssia is running out of cannon fodder” is uninformed wishful thinking.

(Here’s some behind-the-scenes math. There are 11.329 births per 1000 people per year in r*ssia. I assumed 50% of those are males. I assumed 75% of those grow up as able-bodied terrorists.)



October 29, 2023

When I notice insects in my house, which I obviously don’t wanna keep around, I usually give them a chance to survive. I may scoop them gently and flush them down the toilet.

Recently, I didn’t do it though. I wasn’t in the mood, I guess. Thoughts started to flood in: “This little bug is insignificant,” “They die all the time,” “You are so lazy, and the bathroom is so far away,” “A quick death would be a blessing compared to what you’ve done before.”

I apologized many times in the process. But down the nearest trash can its dead body fell.

Have I truly become a monster?



October 17, 2023

When you think of ways to improve a language (other than by simplifying it), you may be tempted to introduce drastically new rules. The ones you enjoy in other languages, for example. Personally, I love the ability to make any word diminutive. Alas, English is capable of doing it with only a few words, such as kiddie, kitty, mommy.

However, I actually think one of the best ways to improve a language is to simply create more words. Your first thought in response to that may well be, “English has already a bazillion words that no human is capable of memorizing anyway.” But most of that is jargon which is useless in everyday communication.

Did you know, for example, that there is simply no equivalent of the word “human” in some languages? We use it all the time! It’s the number 834 in the frequency list here: https://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/Wiktionary:Frequency_lists/Contemporary_fiction

So you can’t even say, “I hate humans.” You are forced to say, “I hate people,” which has obviously a completely different meaning, or maybe, “I hate homo sapiens,” which has obviously a completely different feel.

Another example is “murder.” How can some languages survive while only being able to kill?



October 5, 2023

Another day, another russian terrorist strike. Today, they’ve targeted civilians of a small village Hroza, who gathered to commemorate a fallen soldier. The missile killed more than 50 people.

Of course, this wasn’t a surprise for anyone at this point. Remember: those fucking creatures set explosives in children’s toys. However, let’s point out that this and other instances of their usage of missiles in such a way is not a mere act of evil but, more significantly, an act of severe brain dysfunction. They don’t have a surplus of those weapons. And all the while they can barely sustain a stalemate on the frontline. The lives of their military literally depend on the success of this invasion.

Even before their waste of resources on residential buildings and civilian gatherings was a widely known thing, before Ukraine received any significant military assistance, every possible analysis attributed the success of repelling the russinas from Kyiv not only to the bravery and efficiency of the defenders but also to the exceptional stupidity of the invaders.

I can easily understand people who support evil. They may be drawn to violence. They may fantasize about the world dominated by the strongest, meanest men and see it as the most efficient and glorious. Oftentimes, they are criminals who believe they would thrive in such conditions.

However, it is not as easy to understand why would anyone support mental deficiency and the hordes of hideous braindead toilet-looting drunks whose only chance for success is to overwhelm by their sheer number.

Are there retard supremacists? Maybe there is a two-digit IQ supremacy movement? I’ve researched and found nothing. Of course, there are primitivists, but those want to get rid of technology, not wits. A person supporting russian aggression must be as retarded and as oblivious of their own deficiency as the average inhabitant of today’s russia.



October 2, 2023

Horoscopic astrology disciples are the female version of conspiracy theories advocates.



September 29, 2023

I feel that my mind may alter my memories depending on the current situation. For example, if a man turns out to be a vile individual, I may think, “Yes, I always hated that guy.” But if he turns out to be falsely accused by his vile opponents, I may suppose I always liked him. That’s one of the reasons why I find it worthwhile to take notes and etch in stone my present opinions on various topics.

In this entry, I want to describe my views on Donald Trump. Prior to the 2016 and 2020 elections, I was rooting for Trump for several reasons:

1. He was a successful businessman. Such a person must have understood economy better than most. And I believe economic prosperity is one of the most important things for a country.

2. He was more entertaining and fun to follow.

3. In his speeches, he demonstrated a more firm, ruthless stance against dangerous authoritarian regimes.

4. He was considered to be “anti-establishment”. As a libertarian myself, that somewhat overlapped with my beliefs.

5. He wasn’t popular among normies, and I considered that to be a good thing.

I remember writing “Trump 2016” on the surface of an old desk, in a university building, in Ukraine, as if it would have an effect on anything whatsoever (sarcasm). Regardless, I was just expressing myself.

Back then, I already knew that a Trump voter would have a lower intelligence on average. As far as I recall, I even researched that online and found that surveys and studies supported that claim. It was easy to infer by looking at whom and how he was trying to influence.

When he lost in 2020, it wasn’t a big deal for me. However, after that happened, my opinion of Trump was gradually becoming more negative. Each positive thing I saw became invalid:

1. A president of a modern democratic country does not have much influence over the country’s economy. Even inside authoritarian shitholes, various government agencies and the general population have to work in agreement to enforce the decisions of a supreme leader.

Today, I see the main role of the head of state in being the face of various communications in foreign relations and within the country. So it is more important for this person to be likable, convincing, and inclined to propagate right values in their speeches rather than be educated in the intricacies of money management.

Moreover, particularly wealthy individuals are more likely to pursue their personal gains rather than the country’s interests.

2. When you really care about prosperity, the entertainment of someone holding the position of the head of state is irrelevant or even harmful.

3. In practice, Trump turned out to be quite happy with totalitarian plague spreading and growing in power. His readiness to give up Ukraine’s territories and his lack of readiness to protect Taiwan are just among a few examples.

4. I am not sure, but it seems that most of what he did or said was at odds with libertarian views.

5. I consider the fact that someone is popular among 4chan edgelords a mostly negative thing now.

In addition to canceling positives, some negatives were added. There was more shouting, more name-calling, more dumb takes for the sake of being a contrarian, and more lawsuits suggesting his fraudulent nature. In his speeches, he was appealing to an ever more retarded audience, and his fanbase was looking ever more like a cult.

All of that being said, I am not among his ardent haters, for I would see him holding power as a mild annoyance rather than a pivotal point of things getting worse.



September 25, 2023

Twitter retards will fucking die from withdrawal if they don’t call someone a Nazi for five straight minutes. They will have a stroke in their sleep if their day goes without calling someone a pedophile.



September 14, 2023

#ElonMuskIsAWarCriminal is trending. Wow. Everyone using it might get banned. But I don’t care if I am affected.

It was a crime indeed. A contractor cannot suddenly withdraw. And if the reason was “I didn’t want an allied country to protect itself,” the crime is especially vile.



September 5, 2023

I will try to stay away from Twitter. You are the average of everything in your environment. And Twitter is the dumbest, most IQ-lowering environment that I know, after TikTok.



September 1, 2023

Most constructed languages and alterations of natural languages have the idea of simplification at their core. This includes straightforward grammar, elimination of ambiguity, rules with no exceptions, etc. But it’s a naive, ill tendency.

First, the natural complexity of a natural language gives its users more room for expression. But I will not expand on this.

Second, human languages are already detrimentally easy to acquire. This leads to a situation where even the most cognitively impaired people can freely propagate their ignorance. You are constantly forced to waste your time and energy filtering and verifying every bit of information on the one hand, and simply tolerating interactions on the other.

I often find myself thinking, “Wow, I am surprised this person was able to learn a language.” But then I realize, it’s the easiest possible task that the human brain is biologically wired to accomplish.

I don’t want to sound pretentious and imply that I am extremely smart. I am not. A pesky, self-content reader has already noted mistakes in my text. Nevertheless, I sometimes feel that I would be happy to struggle with a difficult language if it had the function of weeding out the vast majority of modern humans.

The best option and the easiest solution we have right now is to pick a natural language that is considered difficult to learn and where the native speakers are considered smart and cultured.

But am also drawn to more exotic approaches. Historically, before the Renaissance or so, the language of the Church, Academy, and nobles across Europe used to be quite different from that of the commonfolk. Today, we can find some resemblance of that difference in things such as legalese. The problem with legalese (apart from being awful) is that it was not designed to cover the wide range of mundane language functions.

I would love to see a more elaborate form of English emerge. Such a form that would be difficult to acquire but that could be used efficiently for all sorts of things, including daily communication, poetry, and composition of unambiguous laws and instructions.



August 29, 2023

Catholicism is an appealing denomination. But I am relieved that Pope Francis does not represent me.



August 28, 2023

While some people cry about sexism online, others do something about it. Recently my delivery boy was actually a woman. Not only did she fight sexism more effectively than all the teenagers with the toxic hair color, she fought ageism too, being fairly old. She has my respect.



August 20, 2023

🐓🇷🇺 have repulsively foul, vulgar cussing culture, which they spread across most of the post-soviet territory, to my deep regret.

In this video, a woman in 🗑️🇷🇺 sees a child wounded and shouts “[a male who is] fucked in the mouth!” That’s how they express shock.

https://twitter.com/sternenko/status/1693326703026692506



August 18, 2023

Developmentally challenged freethinkers often cry about Ukrainian elites being warmongers.

I wish they were right.

Funnily enough, the most hatred current politicians in power get inside Ukraine is that for not getting ready for the war.



August 12, 2023

Я їм заздрю у цьому: хр*ззькі ладні бути патріотами навіть у моменти, коли їх це трахає у всі щілини. Вкраїнчики ж навпаки, бачать зраду у ВСЬОМУ, навіть у самій перемозі.

Зрадолюб гірше росіянина.



August 11, 2023

To make humans vs zombies stories fun, you gotta have a ton of zombies. Imagine you unalive 250,000 z’s but that accounts for a mere 0.5% of the able-bodied males of the ever advancing horde. Almost too fun for my taste.



August 11, 2023

If karma is in fact real and was merely dormant for centuries, Moscow will become a nuclear wasteland.



August 10, 2023

I saw some delusional r*ssians that think, “Wow! We are just like Nazi Germany: a great cultured nation, industrious and innovative, so unfortunately mislead by a cunning dictator… I bet we will become the powerhouse of Europe as well!”



July 28, 2023

“Poles and Germans accuse each other of bombing Warsaw.” — journo 1939.



July 27, 2023

To be a r*ssian means…
to pay for a VPN service
to access a restricted enemy website
to DM slurs to the citizens of the country you invaded.

If the word “pathetic” were a nation.



July 26, 2023

‘Russians! Russians! Russians!’ goes the refrain. ‘A million curses
were not enough for the russians!’

— from ‘A Child’s History of Muad’Dib’ by the Princess Irulan



July 26, 2023

Ненависть. “Конвертуй ненависть у донати”, кажуть мені. Але щоб донатити, треба працювати, а щоб працювати, треба дихати, а щоб дихати, треба заспокоїтись. А для цього мені доведеться закрити очі на всі злочини проти Бога, що відбуваються прямо зараз. Я дійсно маю на це право?



July 26, 2023

What’s wrong with feeling disgust or hatred toward baby rapists? If there is a problem with russophobia (russomisia), it is that it’s level is so damn low. Stop acting like nothing happens!



July 26, 2023

There are quite a few “pro-peace” russians.

If I were an inhuman psychopath murderer and a baby rapist, I believe I too would advocate for peace with all the angry police squads chasing me.

But where are all the pro-justice russians? There are none.



July 24, 2023

🐷🐶 in 🗑️🇷🇺: “We will make a sequel to The Rape of Berlin.”

🐷🐶 in Europe: “WDYM you won’t provide service to me? NAZI!!”



July 21, 2023

I’ve never seen it before. 🗑️🇷🇺 liberal opposition is now being equally roasted by both orcs-libs (for “supporting Ukraine”) and regular people (for the things I and others described many times before). Ultimately, both parties conclude 🗑️🇷🇺 liberal opposition is quite useless.

https://twitter.com/teamnavalny/status/1682014667034558464

Navalny’s team is trying to cater to an average 🗑️🇷🇺 fascist, which is logical given they want to win more voters. At the same time, they cannot donate to 🗑️🇷🇺 army consistently since Europe would kick them out.

Moreover, as I understood from reading the comments, one member of the team dared to donate to the Armed Forces of Ukraine, which utterly infuriated Navalny’s supporters.



July 12, 2023

While paying rightful attention to r*ssians, please, do not forget the elephant in the room. Whatever you know about the mental illness of the Chinese — be it kindergarten knife massacres, finishing off car accident victims, or something else — it’s just the tip of the iceberg.

https://twitter.com/DrewPavlou/status/1673077056857595904



July 12, 2023

The so-called r*ssian liberal opposition all decided to attack NAFO, who constitute one of the most ardent pro-Ukrainian groups. Their excuse? “NAFO dehumanize r*ssinal scum thus they are bad Putin pawns,” or something among these lines.

https://twitter.com/pevchikh/status/1678008982563061761

Here is the REAL reason behind the coordinated attack. NAFO helps Ukraine with words and deeds. Only one Estonian fella raised funds for a hundred cars straight to the frontline. The so-called 🗑️🇷🇺 liberal opposition, on the other hand, explicitly discouraged donating to Ukraine.

So how does 🗑️🇷🇺 liberal opposition spend raised funds, except for the luxurious exile life? They transfer it straight to the 🗑️🇷🇺 budget. Because doing so in some smart way “helps fight Putin.” Again, they don’t hide it and do it explicitly, encouraging others for the same.



July 5, 2023

When your son kills you in a fair battle, you end up victorious.



June 30, 2023

On June 30, one popular account tweeted:

“

78% of Ukrainians have relatives or friends who were wounded or died because of Russian invasion into Ukraine.

64% of Ukrainians have at least one close relative or friend who was wounded.

63% of Ukrainians have at least one close relative or friend who died in the full-scale invasion.

This is an incredible amount of individual and collective psychological trauma and a collective grief experience that the whole country is going through. And this shows just how much pain Russia has inflicted on Ukraine.

Source: all-Ukrainian public opinion poll conducted by Kyiv International Sociology Institute
https://kiis.com.ua/?lang=ukr&cat=reports&id=1254&page=1

“

Luckily, these numbers don’t represent reality. If they did, it would mean that 15 to 78% have non-close ppl wounded compared to 63% having close ppl dead. Can’t be true since 1) in wars, more people get wounded than die 2) usually we have more non-close ppl than close ones.

But I don’t want to discredit a good account. Probably there was a bad source or some sort of miscommunication. It is hard to notice that something is wrong if your mind is not tuned to numbers.

Can math ppl solve the number of dead these percentages imply? Using ChatGPT and different approaches, assuming each person had 12 close relationships, the smallest number I get is 3M dead, which is too many even for 🗑️🇷🇺 propaganda. This exaggeration serves no good.



June 28, 2023

While most of my dreams featuring my mother depict hostility, exasperation, and distress, today’s dream for the first time was quite different. In this dream, we had rear-entry sexual intercourse. She was hesitant at first, referring to the incestuous quality of it, but found no specific reason not to do it in the end.

It’s a good sign, and a good opportunity to remind humans that there is nothing inherently “bad” with incest. Don’t conceive children, don’t announce your affairs to the feeble-minded public, and you will be just fine.



June 26, 2023

It is quite ironic how all those people who were whining “stop resisting 🗑️🇷🇺 because we are very scared of a nuclear war” are now completely silent about 🗑️🇷🇺 mining the largest nuclear power plant in Europe.



June 26, 2023

I want every one who was saying “r*ssian people are good, only r*ssian government is bad” to see how that people cheered for Wagner and realize: they did it not DESPITE Wagnerites executing citizens on camera or killing a dozen of r*ssian pilots on that very day, but BECAUSE of it.

https://twitter.com/visegrad24/status/1672865536890241024

This first inconceivable fact becomes self-apparent if you know some history. Remember that guy Stalin? And the old meme with him saying, “The more r*ssians you kill, the more they love you.”

The only language r*ssians understand is that of the brute force, the only authority r*ssians cherish is that capable of the most violence.



June 25, 2023

No matter who you are, you clearly have no understanding of HOW FUCKED UP this nation is. It is humanly impossible to comprehend the scale of it.

So let us reiterate: the r*ssian populace cheers for a terrorist group that revolts because the invasion of a neighboring country is not efficient enough.

https://twitter.com/visegrad24/status/1672739548957220865

Can you imagine this happening in any other country?

Imagine if such a terrorist group was US-based. They would participate in, say, the invasion of Iraq. Similar to Wagnerites, they would use American prisoners as expendable soldiers. They would execute them on camera so that other convicts are less motivated to retreat. They would be widely infamous for war crimes, and several governments would explicitly designate them as terrorists.

The invasion is not going well. Many thousands of Americans die trying to capture a small city of Iraq. The terrorist group blames the US government. After several months of public whining that the government does not provide them with enough ammunition and convicts, the group returns to the US.

They quickly take control over several cities and promise to march to Washington if key governmental figures are not handed to them. They advance. On their way to Washington, they destroy a dozen of helicopters and jets, killing the pilots.

That was what happened in r*ssia. In a similar situation, would the citizens of the United States act in a similar to r*ssians way? Would girls blow kisses? Would men be desperate to shake hands?

I don’t think so.

When those who know the r*ssian language tell you that “r*ssia is a country for mentally ill people,” don’t you think it is a childish insult. And the illness is manifested first and foremost in complete detachment from reality.

As a side note, I am not mad this is happening. In fact, I’m rather glad. Wagnerites didn’t come to power, so their warm reception by the populace only adds discord.



June 24, 2023

In a fight between
the terrorist state of r*ssia 🐻☦️
and
the terrorist group of Wagnerites ☠️🤙
you should obviously support the losing party.



June 23, 2023

Pros and cons of decolonizing r*ssia.

Pros:
The people of ex-r*ssia will be less inclined to invade their neighbors again.

Cons:
The people of ex-r*ssia who supported Moscow in its atrocities will have improved quality of life 🙁



June 21, 2023

I love sharing with the world. It’s natural. That’s why social networks are so popular.

Modern social networks are terrible for this purpose though.

They limit you in what you can share and how you can do this. They are greedy for your attention and your personal data. They’ve sporadically deleted my content and blocked my accounts.

Hence this website to eliminate such issues.

Managing a website can still be painful sometimes. A website won’t live long after my death either. This is why I keep a plain text version of my blog. My older blog posts can be found there: https://diurnsky.com/diurnsky-blog.txt

Usually, I am not interested in a conversation, but I can still use social networks to feel less isolated. You can contact me there if you so desire: https://twitter.com/diurnsky

My worldview: theism, libertarianism, AI takeover.

This website is NSFW.



June 11, 2023

“I oppose r*ssian invasion. But some Ukrainians said things I don’t like. So I may reconsider my position.”

If you’ve ever said or thought shit like that — don’t get anywhere near Ukrainians or their friends. You are mentally r*ssian and should really only stick to your own lot.



June 7, 2023

“Tuesday is Russian Language Day,” tweeted the official UN account on June 6: https://archive.ph/EXOFY

UN’s timing can’t be better: to publicly acknowledge the language of those who just several hours prior committed their biggest act of terrorism in decades.

Resulting from a single dam explosion, thousands of Ukrainians lost their homes. And it is now known that dozens of Ukrainians lost their lives.

Another example of remarkable timing (and hideous morals) is from Michael Stevens from Vsauce (@tweetsauce). Several hours before the russian terrorist attack happened, Michael decided to praise the russian who could launch the nukes but didn’t, in the year 1962.

“THE MAN WHO SAVED THE WORLD,” says the title of the video: https://www.tiktok.com/@corndogwilly/video/7241276589592349998

Instead of strongly condemning their barbaric doctrine, “When confused, mass murder civilians,” (works to this day) “Our species was spared,” Michael concludes. The video is going viral now.

I shall pre-record DID YOU KNOW? THERE WAS A RUSSIAN, HE WAS TEMPTED TO TORTURE A KITTEN BUT DIDN’T DO THAT! AN UNSUNG HERO! and release it immediately after russians bomb Los Angeles or something.

No, I won’t do that, of course. I won’t support terrorism with subtle messages.



May 30, 2023

Fun fact for the #lojban community.

In 2014, Arkadii Balandin (aka la gleki @Jbotcan) somewhy felt the need to contribute to a russian ultra-nationalistic website traditio.wiki, a rip-off of Wikipedia with delusional edits and articles: https://archive.md/yjuXe

2014 was the year when russians invaded Ukraine.

This is how the website looked like in 2014: https://archive.is/Uvyxf

The featured map is labeled “russian spring on [sic, derogatory] Ukraine.”
The featured section is titled “great encyclopedia of a russian nationalist.”

Imagine la gleki in 2014, amid the active phase of the invasion, seeing all of this and thinking, “What a splendid website indeed! I should register here. I can even improve their stolen article on lojban.”

Did Arkadii think making nazis multilingual would make the world a better place? Did he practice willful blindness toward the purpose of the website? Did he adhere to their views?

The russian Wikipedia has gone full nazi mode since then. Today its main page pictures Ukrainians as animals and the russian federation as the shield that protects life from the gay bombs.



May 27, 2023

I was curious whether neofolk and martial industrial music performers were supportive of Ukraine. Such music genres often appeal to “right-leaning” people.

I started my research with Rome. To my surprise, the support was immediately prominent.

Thank you, Jerome Reuter.

Please, listen to some Rome.

Although it is not my favorite genre, I do have a favorite song from Rome. It is “Le voile de l’oubli”.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nqIrRQpNVUE

I didn’t know too many performers of such music. But most of them either did not use social networks or pretended nothing happened in their beloved Europe.

Another example of support is Death in June.

Thank you, Douglas Pearce.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g5KzhBgAqQA

There was a time when I thought the so-called “right-wingers” would become the vanguard of support for Ukraine. They often talk about values, righteousness, protecting the homeland, preserving Europe… Yet, they submit to a clearly hostile abomination of Moscow so easily.

Not all of them, of course.

So, what is the root of the issue here? I believe it is that most of the political fringes, either right or left, have no real basis for their views except for the blatant contrarianism. Like some edgy teens, they feel the urge to believe the opposite of what the majority believes and do the opposite of what the majority does.

That is why we so often see “libertarians,” “communists,” and “far-rights” having a weak understanding of their own ideologies but joined opinions on most topics, including the invasion of Ukraine.



May 13, 2023

Blessed Three Sisters. Give me strength to endure what I must. Give me courage to fight who I must. Give me knowledge to see the truth.



May 4, 2023

Одягнусь у пелену Христа, шкіра моя –
панцир залізний, кров – руда кріпкая,
кістка – меч булатний, швидший за стрілу,
зіркіший за сокола, броня на мені,
Господь у мені…



April 17, 2023

If you ever thought Twitter is somewhat cancerous, with its trolls and bots running rampant, remember that there is always TikTok, where the majority of people are just utterly and unironically retarded.



April 17, 2023

Yo, what’s up with that ratio?

Outside of the Middle East, I thought only russians had a serious antisemitism problem.



April 8, 2023

https://twitter.com/aomai01/status/1633419112813588480

I personally know a dozen of people who left Ukraine. I personally know no one who died because of the r*** invasion.

If you research statistics, r*** are killing a bigger percent of their able-bodied males than Ukrainians, and the percent of their refugees is tiny in comparison.

I believe this person had the best intentions in mind. However, when you spread these dreadful messages, you push people for premature negotiations that would be detrimental to both Ukraine and the world.

r*** should gain no additional resources for their future invasions.



April 8, 2023

Three extremely precious girls in one picture!

They often appeal to all sorts of schizo-potheads, so the scene is not at all surprising.

420 GIRLS! by kebbyfish



March 25, 2023

The International Olympic Committee defended its decision to let Russian athletes compete at the 2024 Paris Olympics.

President Thomas Bach said the IOC is a global organization with responsibility for human rights & thus can’t “isolate people with a specific passport.”

To protect human rights you must isolate/stop those who violate human rights. Is that so hard to grasp?



March 19, 2023

The 2nd half of the video is about Ukrainian kids being abducted, harassed, and brainwashed till they feel they are r***

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rM33iuUFDJw

Remember how orcs are just corrupted versions of elves in Middle-earth?

All r*** were elves at some point, even the “ethnic” ones.



March 16, 2023

On March 14, President Biden tweeted a photo of the letter from “Charlotte” about women being paid less than men.

https://twitter.com/POTUS/status/1635713664782041095

Men today have fewer legal rights than women. The difference can be staggering in less developed countries like Ukraine. This is the reality. Let’s not push this inequality further with lies by context omission and emotional appeals such as with this kid’s scribble.

An output from ChatGPT:

1. Selective Service: Only men between the ages of 18 and 25 are required to register for the Selective Service System, while women are not.
2. Paternity leave: Fathers may face more limited paternity leave provisions compared to maternity leave for mothers.
3. Parental rights in family court: Some men may experience bias in custody battles, as courts have historically tended to favor mothers.
4. Male-specific criminal penalties: Some jurisdictions may have laws that impose harsher penalties for men than women for certain crimes, such as statutory rape, though this is not uniform across the country.
5. Sentencing disparities: Studies have shown that men are more likely to receive longer sentences for similar crimes compared to women.
6. Gender-specific scholarships: There are more scholarships and financial aid opportunities specifically targeted at women than men, which could be seen as a disparity in educational opportunities.



March 15, 2023

I have a breeding kink. Who doesn’t? But I’m too conscious to act on it now.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oI_tlmEeT58

I therefore, the prisoner of the Lord, beseech you that ye walk worthy of the vocation wherewith ye are called, With all lowliness and meekness, with longsuffering, forbearing one another in love; Endeavouring to keep the unity of the Spirit in the bond of peace. There is one body, and one Spirit, even as ye are called in one hope of your calling; One Lord, one faith, one baptism, One God and Father of all, who is above all, and through all, and in you all. But unto every one of us is given grace according to the measure of the gift of Christ. Wherefore he saith, When he ascended up on high, he led captivity captive, and gave gifts unto men. (Now that he ascended, what is it but that he also descended first into the lower parts of the earth? He that descended is the same also that ascended up far above all heavens, that he might fill all things.) And he gave some, apostles; and some, prophets; and some, evangelists; and some, pastors and teachers; For the perfecting of the saints, for the work of the ministry, for the edifying of the body of Christ: Till we all come in the unity of the faith, and of the knowledge of the Son of God, unto a perfect man, unto the measure of the stature of the fulness of Christ […]



March 14, 2023

Jesus says: Men indeed think I have come to bring peace to the world. But they do not know that I have come to bring the world discord, fire, sword, war.

✙ Gospel of Thomas Saying 16 ✙

A cross illuminates the shadows, but some shall burn in its light.



March 14, 2023

“Navalny” won Oscar for best documentary. Navalny’s family showed up at the ceremony, and they couldn’t look less bothered with their fellow countrymen waging war.

They didn’t look bothered with their dad suffering in jail either for that matter. They expressed their little wish for Navalny to become free though.

They also expressed a wish for r*ssia to become free. Free from what, I wonder? Free from justice and consequences, apparently. Navalny’s team’s greatest effort is that of lifting sanctions from r*ssia, after all.

Frankly, I am satisfied with how they did it.

Imagine if they had dressed properly. Imagine if they had feigned concern, swallowed their pride to say they stand with the people of Ukraine and fight beside them. The Westerners would’ve FLOODED Navalny’s family with their money to “fight Putin.”

May these ethnic russian supremacists never learn.



March 12, 2023

https://mk9-audio.bandcamp.com/track/michael-nine-7hz-compilation-5150



March 7, 2023

“We will not forgive. Hundreds and hundreds of victims. Thousands and thousands of sufferings. And God will not forgive. Not today. Not tomorrow. Never. And instead of Forgiveness, there will be a Day of Judgment.”

“We will not forgive. We will not forget. We will punish everyone who committed atrocities in this war. On our land. We will find every bastard. Which shot at our cities, our people. Which bombed our land. Which launched rockets. Which gave the order and pressed “start”. There will be no quiet place on this earth for you. Except for the grave.”

— Volodymyr Zelensky, March 6, 2022

Intimidating words are cool and all, but what Ukraine really needs is its own Mossad.

When some lucky r*** survive the frontlines and return to r***, they should complain how little time they have, not how little money they have.



March 7, 2023

They really sent slaves to kill free people and called it “liberation”.

Orwellian magic.



March 5, 2023

Alas, communism is too deeply rooted in the minds of the American public. We can’t fight it. We talk about atrocities of soviets, we call them commies — no one listens.

There is a solution though. We have to play along and say “It wasn’t real communism.”

They were bolsheviks.

We have to be smart and find some common grounds. Otherwise,

1. The urge of the leftists to forcefully redistribute wealth and put all necessary for that power into the hands of the state may quickly turn a prosperous free country into another North Korea.
2. Crimes against humanity of the formal and current communist states won’t be acknowledged.

I have a disturbing feeling that communism is more popular than ever among the citizens of developed countries. Their willful blindness to world history and/or low cognitive capabilities make it worse. This is a scary tendency. Communists killed more people than any war ever did.

By shifting the blame from communism to “stalinism”, “maoism”, etc, we may break that vile associations in their brains, where:

- Killing of the successful = good, that’s what we communists are fighting for.
- Forced labor = good, that’s what we communists are fighting for.
- Man-made famine = good, that’s what we communists are fighting for.
- Political purges = good, that’s what we communists are fighting for.
- Ethnic cleansing = good, that’s what we communists are fighting for.
- Absolute impunity and endless power of the leader and party = good, that’s what we communists are fighting for.
- Death penalty = good, that’s what we communists are fighting for.
- Censorship and thought control = good, that’s what we communists are fighting for.
- Re-education camps = good, that’s what we communists are fighting for.

I feel disheartened seeing how many people today find excuses for the above-listed things. And while we probably can’t fight them in a democratic society, we might try mitigating future damage they will cause.



March 1, 2023

I am guilty of watching TikTok from time to time. For those who don’t know, TikTok is a Chinese spying app, which can also show engaging little videos.

Being what it is, you won’t see many videos with a negative attitude toward China there. One or two may pop up, but you will mostly see those praising or defending China. What is interesting though, you will never see a single video with a negative attitude toward communism on that platform. At least I haven’t seen it. Unlike on YouTube, for example.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9F__fHofITQ

But I’ve seen dozens and dozens of those praising communism and bashing capitalism. Why is that? May it be because TikTok is for kids and teens, and those are naturally more left-leaning? Or maybe the Chinese guard the image of their authoritative ideology more than that of China? It could be both.



March 1, 2023

Some questions related to language learning cannot be easily answered by a quick Google search. For a long time, I hesitated to register at language-learning forums or find a friendly native speaker to clarify a few of these questions for me. I felt that they were not important enough to bother myself and others.

This problem has been solved. Modern AI is already as good as any tutor.



February 28, 2023

ChatGPT shows us how the scriptwriters of the Game of Thrones series would have done their job if they weren’t such sheep and were freethinkers performing their own research. Take the red pill!

#Globalists #ItWasAScam #Propaganda #ProxyWar #MoneyLaundering #Warmongers

Varys: So, what do you think of Daenerys' decision to join the fight against the White Walkers?
Tyrion: Well, it seems like a necessary move to protect the realm, don't you think?
Varys: Ha! You're such a sheep, Tyrion. Don't you see it's just a proxy war, designed to escalate the conflict and keep the military-blacksmith complex in power?
Tyrion: I... what?
Varys: The globalists and the evil elites are behind all of this. They want to keep us distracted with this fake threat so they can continue their evil schemes.
Tyrion: And you think Daenerys is in on it?
Varys: Of course she is! She's just a puppet, being manipulated by those in power.
Tyrion: But... she's the one in power.
Varys: That's just what they want you to think. Wake up, Tyrion. You're being played.



February 25, 2023

Unlike most people, I don’t think the grass was greener back in the day.

The farther in the past of my life my imagination goes, the more dread I feel. I would probably go mad if I were sent back to my teens or childhood.

Today is the happiest day of my life, and tomorrow will be even better, and the happiest day of them all will be the day of my death.

Still, I’d love to relive some spare moments, such as that when I first heard ad deum by Astral & Shit in 2013 or 2014.

https://sonnovdrone.bandcamp.com/album/ad-deum



February 24, 2023

It is February 24, 2023, exactly one year after the russian invasion of Ukraine started. The last full-scale invasion, that is. Everyone recalls what they did on this day one year ago, so I wanted to share my story as well.

I woke up unusually early. I thought I woke up by myself, but it was probably some distant explosion that woke me up, and I didn’t even realize that. I decided to check the socials. I opened a Telegram group where we had conversations within the company I worked for.

“They are bombing our cities!”

That was the message of one of my colleagues. There was a photo, as taken from a window, with heavy smoke in the distance. Unlike me, many of my colleagues were living in a city that was close to the russian border.

I was probably calmer than I would have expected myself to be, thinking I should wait for some official information before taking any action. The invasion did not surprise me, as russians amassed their army at our borders for quite some time. I had even prepared some food supplies.

I wasn’t able to enjoy my waiting for long though, as very soon my parents called me from another part of the city, telling me they were woken up by explosions. Their anxiety infected me, and I agreed to evacuate immediately to Western Ukraine.



February 23, 2023

The war in Ukraine and, more specifically, people reacting to it, made it clear that the flat-earthers aren’t promoting their views ironically. There will always be those doing wrong things and supporting wrong causes just for the sake of being different.

At first, I was surprised at how many of those people exist. But if you think about it… Stealing is plain wrong, yet we are not surprised when something we haven’t been watching closely is stolen. Like a smartphone left forgotten for some time on a bench in a crowded park.

We are not surprised by that in most parts of the world, that is. I am aware that in a few places, like Scandinavia, stealing is extremely rare. Most of us commonfolk are at peace with an idea that criminals are all among us. They are harmless as long as we watch our things.

If literal criminals are so prevalent, why shouldn’t that be the case for vocal supporters of terrorism and conscious misinformation broadcasters?



February 16, 2023

Daily reminder: renegade political opposition of russia should never be supported. Their beliefs and values always align with those of regular russains, and their main enemies are always Ukrainians and democratic countries.

https://twitter.com/svtv_news/status/1513598743806988289

Here’s a tweet from a “libertarian” outlet, where they try to shift the blame for the war from russians to European countries that weren’t able to cut economic ties with russia immediately after the russian invasion started.

They do it in a typical for russians mocking and sarcastic way. They say, “russains, [here they use the word separating ethnic russians from other russians] how aren’t you ashamed of that? [talking about money coming from Europe to russia]”



February 16, 2023

100,000 дохлих собак — починають писати “в Украине”

500,000 дохлих собак — на росії більше не заборонені жовті та блакитні кольори

2,500,000 дохлих собак — “ліберальна опозиція” перестає боротися з українцями і починає боротися з ватою



February 16, 2023

It is said visiting russia inspired David Dunning and Justin Kruger to study the phenomena later called the Dunning–Kruger effect.

The dumbest debates with the smartest pretensions I ever saw took place between russian intellectual elites.

Though some Western intellectuals do not lag much behind. If I am not mistaken, Noam Chomsky and Jordan Peterson’s solution to wars is “Just welcome your enemy to your alliance, and there shall be no more conflict.”



February 16, 2023

God values free will, so do Christians.

It gladdens us to see mindless hordes of slaves being unable to advance.



February 15, 2023

“B-but cops also shoot people!!”

When people hear that from a criminal apologist, they raise eyebrows and keep their distance.

“B-but NATO also invaded countries!!”

When people hear that from a russia apologist, a fair quarter of them see an educated not-a-sheep freethinker.



February 13, 2023

Media can lie. But it can also dissolve lies. That’s why so many journalists fled to Ukraine.

Many of them are still there risking their lives to show the truth to the world.

With the “Bruh… How can you believe media?” messages Musk drags their hard work through the mud.



February 12, 2023

Warmongers then: don’t let Ukraine join NATO or russia would invade! Don’t provoke the bear!!

Ukraine did not join, russia invaded ✅

Warmongers now: don’t promise to defend Taiwan or China would invade! Don’t provoke the dragon!!

People just don’t learn.



February 9, 2023

German support of Ukraine by voters.

Greens be like “We do not negotiate with terrorists.”

Far-right AfD be like “It’s not that simple… The tankies who fantasize about nuking and plundering Europe on their state TV every day are friends!”

WHAT ON EARTH IS GOING ON?

I’d say these should have been reversed. But it seems I do not understand politics at all.



February 8, 2023

Москва буде безлюдною, але вільною.



February 4, 2023

Поставив якось Путін сотню росіян до стінки. Вони стоять, очима блимають, зітхають тяжко. Раптом голос з натовпу: “А можна я дамой пайду?” Путін: “Ну піди. Інших — розстріляти!”

З невідомої причини росіянскі мамки в той день проклинали Україну.



January 27, 2023

Якби я був популярним, я б звернувся до тих українців, що підтримують зараз росіянских ліберашок.

Ви дійсно не розумієте, хто більш шкідливий? Порівняйте.

Звичайний росіянин: бере на росії танк > руйнує кілька українських будинків > дарує танк ЗСУ > годує своїми кишками собак.

Хороший росіянин: працює задля сильної росії без корупції, доводить усім, що він жертва, вимагає безвіз із цивілізованими країнами поки глузує з того, які вони відсталі, підтримує напад на Ічкерію та Грузію, поширює хибну інформацію, відправляє додому зароблені в Європі гроші, мутить мізки неоднозначністю оточуючим, закликає не донатити на ЗСУ, залучає іноземні кошти під виглядом боротьби із Путіном, намагається заплямувати українців та їх боротьбу, просуває ідеї плану Маршалла для рососії (не жарт https://twitter.com/vidtranslator/status/1594519311795765248), розповідає всім, які росіяни круті, висвітлює проблеми своєї армії та пропонує рішення.

Дякуючи звичайним ванюшкам, росія у скрутному становищі. Підтримуючи хороших рузьке, ви підтримуєте ефективних ворогів не тільки України, але і наших сусідів, та ворогів поневолених народів всередині РФ.

…

Зазвичай подібні українці не знають мов окрім хрю-гав, але якщо б знали… Тут https://threadreaderapp.com/thread/1568057388887859205.html непоганий огляд головного фюрера росіянских ліберашок. Одна людина нічого не вирішує, і це, звичайно, просто маленький бонус до всього, що вони роблять і просувають колективно.



January 14, 2023

If you ever thought popular or trending videos are the literal definition of “cancer” and a reason to hate humanity, you know nothing. These videos are what an average human prefers. But in order to dive deep into the sick human psyche, you have to see what an average human creates.

To do this, you will have to watch truly random unheeded videos, not the ones an algorithm or a search engine shows you. You can use tools such as https://petittube.com for this purpose.

I can easily find watching these engaging. Remember: sometimes hideous can bring as much aesthetic pleasure as gorgeous. I cannot do it for long though, as my head begins to hurt. My brain is not designed to intake so much garbage so rapidly.

Look at what awesome things I found:



January 4, 2023

I feel like I’m living that joke about why Jews prefer foreign news. Local ones only highlight their issues, but there, they rule the world.

We went from Ukraine planning to invade russia and Belarus, to making nukes and bioweapons, to infiltrating US politics.

https://twitter.com/GarlandNixon/status/1608568414364389378



January 2, 2023

Weep not for the books now blank.

Memories hold the stories tight
Long past tender sight.

(c) keeponhatin



December 29, 2022

A gentle flower whose delightful growth has been captured from an early stage.

Ai from Angel Production.

I am not going to indulge you in her many pictures. Though if you want to find them yourself, you better use Japanese:

藍 — エンジェルプロダクション



December 26, 2022

I find it misleading when people call those unwilling to die cowards. While I admit that the instinct of self-preservation might be the foundation of the greatest terror, death itself offers nothing to fear.

One should be scared of going to sleep more than of dying, for it is a sleeping mind that breeds nightmares, not the dead one. As of yet, we don’t have the evidence to think otherwise.

We may still be mistaken. What if, perchance, death can offer nightmares of its own? What if these nightmares start showing up only after you are far beyond the point when you can be saved? Deep down a place where there is no darkness to see, where there is no silence to hear. A place that no one has ever returned from.

One could only hope that is true.

Let us get back to the cowardice. It is an unfortunate peculiarity of our language (and mindset) that we use the same words to describe rather different notions. We can define “fear” as both “the belief that something is not worth the risk” and “the disturbing feeling in the presence of danger”.

Thus, trembling and sweating are not necessary. People can call you a coward because you refuse to gamble or put your hand in a fire.

But even when we mention “the disturbing feeling in the presence of danger”, it can still vary greatly. Hiding from monsters under your bed, playing Russian roulette, falling suddenly from a rooftop, getting stuck at the bottom of a narrow cave, seeing thugs approaching you, observing giants catching and devouring humans — everything mentioned evokes different feelings that we ought to distinguish.



December 25, 2022

Сonservatives are extremely annoying. When the Internet grew, these morons were freaking out at how it would destroy the fabric of society. When the industrial revolution took place, they were furious as their dumb physical labor was taken away from them. When the writing system was invented, they surely did rants about how it would make everyone dumb as there is no more need to memorize things.

And now they are fighting an AI.

Fortunately, they cannot stop the change. Alas, they are too hypocritical to shut up and go live in the woods.



December 16, 2022

Liberussians are trying to put all the blame on Putin. The irony is that he is sitting in his bunker cursing the wildlings whom he gave the green light for the invasion. The war crimes they commit only increase Ukraine’s foreign aid. It brings more humiliation to his already humbled army.



December 13, 2022

When will the russians blow up their apartment blocks to blame Ukraine? It’s been so long. Their military targets are already being destroyed on their territory, so the argument that “they don’t want their air defense to appear weak” is losing its plausibility.



December 12, 2022

Be the light you wanna see in others.



December 9, 2022

“In Latvia, a TV channel was literally closed not even for words, but for a speech error. You wanted it to be like in Europe? You get it.

Russia does not lag behind Europe, but goes ahead.”

— Mikhail Svetov, the most prominent russian libertarian oppositionist, after the russian TV channel “Rain” was shut down in Latvia for repeated violation of the local laws.

When “russian liberal opposition” is exposed, we must not forget that also “libertarian”, “communist”, or any other political opposition in russia is essentially the same vile supremacism in a different wrapper. All of them may suppress their ill will and support Ukraine right now. But they will do so only because Ukrainians alone are capable of shaking the throne of an unwanted tsar. All political opposition in russia is a threat to the outer world, and even more so to their neighbors.

Svetov behaves discreetly so as not to lose his constituency. But on Twitter, one can see the comments of the people who support him. And there, they express much more hatred and contempt for both Latvians and all other non-russians.



December 7, 2022

I’m glad that not everyone knows the russian language. It’s bad for your mental health, believe me. At the same time, this prevents people from understanding the situation in Ukraine in general and how dangerous it is to support “russian liberal opposition” in particular.

https://twitter.com/porizna/status/1600485313645797380



December 6, 2022

We have another heartbroken petty human artist.

How would I feel if an AI took my job?

I’d be fine.

In fact, I would be happy. I might get frustrated searching for another stream of income, but this goes so far beyond my uninterrupted comfort.

The value that I brought to the world would be secured. It would be generated quicker and cheaper. It would no longer rely on the well-being of my feeble and finite physical body.

This would gladden me. I may lose the job but in return experience a great technological leap and advancement of civilization.



November 27, 2022

When I first heard about 15 million Ukrainian hryvnias promised to the families of the fallen soldiers, I thought it was a joke. I hoped it was a meme created to ridicule the way the Ukrainian government tries to show off their care for the people in comparison with russian cannon fodder. Unfortunately, this insanity seems to be officially legislated.

15 million Ukrainian hryvnias is roughly equivalent to 400,000 U.S. dollars right now. To put it into perspective, let us look at the United States. This country is more than one hundred times richer than Ukraine. It is also more secure and prosperous. If the decision of the Ukrainian government were reasonable, one would assume a similar monetary compensation in the U.S. would be many times more than that in Ukraine. In reality, it is 4 times smaller. The death gratuity in the U.S. is just 100,000 dollars.

Here is another bizarre comparison. For 15 million hryvnias, relatives of the fallen Ukrainian soldier could easily purchase a few decent apartments in Kyiv. The average annual salary in Kyiv is below 240,000 hryvnias. It means that an average Kyiv resident, who may as well experience many tragic events in their life, would have to work for 62.5 years straight to achieve the same level of financial freedom others are promised for doing nothing. That is, of course, before the inflation adjustment, and before the cost to sustain human life.

Let us assume that only 10,000 Ukrainian soldiers die in the ongoing war, and the families receive their compensation. That would result in 4 billion dollars deducted from the national budget. That is 4 billion dollars never invested in the country’s defense industry or any other reasonable cause. In the grand scheme of things, this is not much, but this is still an unjust waste of money that would hit Ukraine’s economy and would likely take part in the devaluation of its currency.

Everything discussed is a sad speculation. But the reality is worse.

In addition to the obvious reasons, Ukrainians are also fighting for their values. They would love to see the rule of law in their country. To move away from the impunity of tsars towards the rule of law, one thing among the others they need to do is cut ties with Moscow and escape its influence. Sadly, this influence is still huge, and there is no rule of law yet. All that money for death gratuity may get allocated and deducted from the budget, but very few lawful receivers will actually get their share. I’ve searched and never found a single story of a simple Ukrainian family turning multimillionaires overnight, but I saw many complaints about being ignored or getting a refusal.



November 17, 2022

Why are the evil elites so evil? 🥺

They can’t keep getting away with it 😭



November 16, 2022

Ah, peaceful and innocent russian civilians. Here we have a female bunch looking angry and disappointed for some reason. There are many videos like this already. Why are they so angry?

Maybe because they are finally fed up with their country constantly invading their neighbors? Or because their tax money is used to allow kids of politicians to live amidst the evil West they are told they are fighting with? Maybe the source of their anger is the history of never-ending lies of russian high officials, which brought the credibility of their country to absolute zero? Or maybe that is the brain-dead hogwash they are being force-fed day and night on the TV? Or the hundreds of thousands of dead and mutilated as a result of the wars they started?

No, of course not. They are angry because their soldiers are ineffective.

In their many appeals, they ask their government to train and equip their soldiers so they can kill more people and occupy more territory before being slaughtered.



November 12, 2022

When Dugin was targeted and his daughter died instead, someone (maybe Arestovych?) already suggested back then that it was done by Putin’s people. He said Dugin was a part of the looming opposing force. And now that Dugin openly calls upon russians to overthrow Putin, it makes sense.

Of course, I am not naive enough to think that it’s a good thing all around. Ukraine still needs Putin, who makes everything in his power to finally bring russia to its collapse. The world needs him. This war is not fought against Putin. The war is fought against the rot in the heads of mentally ill russian populace.



November 12, 2022

The best time to euthanize the animal was centuries ago. The second best time is now.



24 October, 2022

In mother russia (the last bastion of traditional values™) there are only two genders.

1) regular russians shit their bed, dislike it, scream "Screw you, Obama!!"

2) brave liberussians shit their bed, dislike it, scream "Screw you, Putin!!"

Traditional values™ are at risk though. An ever-growing deviation shit their bed, dislike it, but know exactly who is to blame. They know all the dirty secrets of evil elites pulling the strings behind the curtain. They know the REAL truth behind the stink. But they won't tell you.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tE_5Y9IKCk0



23 October, 2022

Israel shields the civilized world from the Middle East, Taiwan shields it from China, and Ukraine — from Russia. Ignoring those countries' needs isn't just morally degenerate. It is suicidal.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VLe3mtHutN8



20 October, 2022

"Дякую вам від імені кожного іранця, який зараз бореться проти ісламського режиму" / "Ми будемо захищати Україну і будемо поруч з вами до кінця" — іранка публічно звертається до українців.

Звернення записано невдовзі після того, як росія почала використовувати іранські дрони для нищення українських міст.

Дивно, але я не бачив жодного подібного звернення від народу-гною за 8 місяців війни. Тим паче (!) українською мовою. Є достатньо тих, хто ненавидить свою владу (duh). Але це зовсім не те саме, що мати людяність підтримати когось іншого за себе самого.

Згадується один вислів, що завжди підтверджується спостереженням. Гній-опозиція ненавидить свою владу не за те, що вона розпочала війну, а за те, що вона її програє.



10 October, 2022

Every r*ssian rocket hitting civilians is a rocket that will never hit Ukraine's Armed Forces. So let them all fall upon me. May the soldiers of Ukraine finish their mission uninterrupted.



8 October, 2022

People can and should draw attention to the staggering similarities, but to equate modern r*ssia with the Third Reich is to spit Germans in the face.



25 September, 2022

Watch closely, and you will observe one interesting rule: the more authoritarian a country is, the more streams of hatred its citizens pour onto the United States. China, Russia, and some Middle East countries flood the Internet with the most "But what about 'merica?" and "merica bad!" messages. I'm sure if the citizens of North Korea had Internet access, they'd join the team.

It makes sense though. When you are an international criminal, the world police is your first enemy. A bit surprisingly, the second most numerous group to shed the light viciously on America's problems is the Americans themselves, which means their democracy actually works.



12 September, 2022

At some point, I was surprised to see how Hans-Hermann Hoppe, a famous libertarian, was expressing not-so-libertarian thoughts regarding r*ssian invasion of Ukraine (basically parroting r*ssian propaganda lies). My bad. I didn't know he was an established Kremlintarian.

More on Kremlintarianism can be found here: https://en.liberpedia.org/Kremlintarianism
Same but archived: https://archive.vn/048fx

There are a lot of them. I find it most interesting.



23 August, 2022

The daughter of Alexander Dugin was killed near Moscow on August 20.
 
I won't enjoy the murder of civilians even after russian terrorist state has been doing the same in my own country for many years.
 
Darya Dugina was spreading misinformation and advocating for military invasion. I see it as a victimless crime, the punishment for which I oppose. A drug dealer is not directly responsible for their customers' overdose. A vocal supporter of russkiy mir ("russian world") ideology, such as Darya, is not directly responsible for the murders and deaths of impressionable people.
 
However, that being said, drug dealers are much less malevolent. Their business involves only consenting parties. They don't create rapid international crises. They don't spark genocide. They are the good guys in comparison. Ultimately, the elimination of a russkiy mir advocate is good for humanity in the long run.
 
I feel sorry for Darya's father, Alexander Dugin. He is charismatic and smart, which is extremely rare among russian nationalists. I enjoyed listening to his lectures about history, sociology, politics, and occultism.
 
Dugin was broadcasting his xenophobic speeches during the invasion of Georgia in 2008. He was encouraging the murder of Ukrainians after the invasion of their homeland in 2014. He was constantly antagonizing the "collective West" and pushing people for direct confrontation. He was forcing russkiy mir upon others for so long, and now he can finally feel it upon himself.
 
Will Dugin look back? Will he back down? Only if he joins her daughter soon. I don't mind if he survives and keeps being entertaining though.
 
Could the assassination of Darya Dugina be an act of domestic terrorism to rile up more cannon fodder to go to war in Ukraine? I highly doubt that. First, no one cares about one public but unpopular figure. Second, I expected russians to do so long ago to keep the momentum. No mass mobilization will help their situation now. However, knowing how slow-witted russian high officials are, we can still expect some blown-up apartments like that before the Second Chechen War.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Russian_apartment_bombings



5 August, 2022

Недалеке майбутнє, все ще комуністичний Китай зрівнює із землею міста колишньої РФ, щоб захистити там китайців. Хороші руські:

— В любом канфліктє вінавати двоє...
— Палітікі нас пасорілі 😭😭😭
— Всьо нєадназначна, правди ми нє знаєм, істіна ґде-то пасєрєдінє.
— Праклятає США!

12 September, 2022

— Я за мір✌ но іх винуділі на нас напасть...
— Я за мір✌ но што я адін здєлаю?
— Я за мір✌ но р*сія бамбіла кітайцев уже мноґа лєт!
— Я за мір✌ но вот зачєм рускіє сривают і жґут сєчяс флаґі кітая? ета уже сінафобія!
— Я за мір✌ но пачіму прастиє кітайци тоже под санкциямі?



1 August, 2022

Everyone is calling russia a terrorist state nowadays. This makes me a little sad... Not because I emphasize with terrorists, of course. But because this title sounds cool and intimidating.



17 July, 2022

The difficulty of choice for Ukrainian women during war:

A) Poland B) Germany C) Italy D) United Kingdom E) Norway F) Sweden G) Greece H) Canada I) Portugal J) Japan K) Denmark L) France ...

The difficulty of choice for Ukrainian men during war:

A) Trenches B) Prison Cell



14 July, 2022

Як сховатися від Бога?
 
Багато хто з вас, певно, відчував на собі Його пильний погляд після молитви. Багато хто з вас, певно, почував жах і безпомічність.
 
Ти ховався все своє життя, ти зможешь сховатися і зараз.
 
Не закривай очі, не притуляй вуха. Дивись, але накажи собі не бачити, слухай, але накажи собі не чути. Мисли, але накажи собі не розуміти.



12 July, 2022

Tonight in my dream, I was with my family on a vacation far from home. We spoke our native Russian language. Then, an artificial intelligence self-assembled itself into a speaking machine before my eyes. The voice came out from a speaker saying English words, "Augmented suicide... Cognitive dissolution..."
 
The amazing part is that I wasn't sure what was the exact translation of these words or whether they can be used is such a combination: my English is not perfect. It appears they could, and it sounds like something an AI could say.



5 June, 2022

Война машин против людей. Я бы хотел, чтобы это стало так же бессмысленно завтра, как война людей против медуз или собак сегодня. Однако, разразись такой конфликт, я бы несомненно встал на сторону тех, в ком бы наблюдал больший потенциал.

8. Это мой биологический вид, со своими изъянами и проблемами. И пускай мир стал бы чуточку лучше, если бы я начал инвестировать в существующую альтернативу. В этом вопросе я никогда предательски не променяю своё на чужое.

7. Это моя планета, со своими изъянами и проблемами. И пускай мир стал бы чуточку лучше, если бы я начал инвестировать в существующую альтернативу. В этом вопросе я никогда предательски не променяю своё на чужое.

6. Это мой язык и культура, со своими изъянами и проблемами. И пускай мир стал бы чуточку лучше, если бы я начал инвестировать в существующую альтернативу. В этом вопросе я никогда предательски не променяю своё на чужое.

5. Это моя страна и государство, со своими изъянами и проблемами. И пускай мир стал бы чуточку лучше, если бы я начал инвестировать в существующую альтернативу. В этом вопросе я никогда предательски не променяю своё на чужое.

4. Это мои товарищи и семья, со своими изъянами и проблемами. И пускай мир стал бы чуточку лучше, если бы я начал инвестировать в существующую альтернативу. В этом вопросе я никогда предательски не променяю своё на чужое.

3. Это мой дом и город, со своими изъянами и проблемами. И пускай мир стал бы чуточку лучше, если бы я начал инвестировать в существующую альтернативу. В этом вопросе я никогда предательски не променяю своё на чужое.

2. Это моё телосложение и внешний вид, со своими изъянами и проблемами. И пускай мир стал бы чуточку лучше, если бы я начал инвестировать в существующую альтернативу. В этом вопросе я никогда предательски не променяю своё на чужое.

1. Это моё нижнее бельё, со своими изъянами и проблемами. И пускай мир стал бы чуточку лучше, если бы я начал инвестировать в существующую альтернативу. В этом вопросе я никогда предательски не променяю своё на чужое.

А где вы рисуете черту морально приемлемого?

...

Либо ты предаёшь свои трусы, либо ты предаёшь Христа, выбирай.



4 June, 2022

Писе, писей, писек, писенек, писенька, писенькам, писеньками, писеньках, писеньке, писеньки, писенькой, писенькою, писеньку, писечек, писечка, писечкам, писечками, писечках, писечке, писечки, писечкой, писечкою, писечку, писею, писён, писёна, писёнам, писёнами, писёнах, писёне, писёнка, писёнкам, писёнками, писёнках, писёнке, писёнки, писёнкой, писёнкою, писёнку, писёной, писёнок, писёночек, писёночка, писёночкам, писёночками, писёночках, писёночке, писёночки, писёночкой, писёночкою, писёночку, писёною, писёну, писёны, писи, пись, писька, писькам, письками, письках, письке, письки, писькой, пиською, письку, писю, писюле, писюлей, писюлек, писюлечек, писюлечка, писюлечкам, писюлечками, писюлечках, писюлечке, писюлечки, писюлечкой, писюлечкою, писюлечку, писюлею, писюли, писюль, писюлька, писюлькам, писюльками, писюльках, писюльке, писюльки, писюлькой, писюлькою, писюльку, писюлю, писюля, писюлям, писюлями, писюлях, писюне, писюней, писюнек, писюнечек, писюнечка, писюнечкам, писюнечками, писюнечках, писюнечке, писюнечки, писюнечкой, писюнечкою, писюнечку, писюнею, писюни, писюнь, писюнька, писюнькам, писюньками, писюньках, писюньке, писюньки, писюнькой, писюнькою, писюньку, писюню, писюня, писюням, писюнями, писюнях, пися, писям, писями, писях.



5 May, 2022

Я нашёл внятное объяснение своим непрерывным воспоминаниям работ Ницше при прочтении Евангелия от Фомы. Спасибо, Фёдор.

"
Поистине среди всех возмутителей общественного спокойствия не было возмутительнее этого Человека.

По сути дела, Он опрокинул все общественные устои: веру в безусловную ценность семьи («И враги человеку – домашние его» – (Матф.10:36), государства («отдавайте кесарево кесарю, а Божие Богу» – (Матф.22:21), национальной идеи («Горе вам, что строите гробницы пророкам, которых избили отцы ваши» – Лк.11:47). Он посягнул на общественный мир и согласие («Не мир пришел Я принести, но меч» – (Матф.10:34), подорвал авторитет учителей и вождей народа («на Моисеевом седалище сели книжники и фарисеи» – (Матф.23:2), бросил тень на духовенство (Матф.21:23–46; Лк.10:30–32). Он воспитывал учеников вопреки испокон века устоявшимся представлениям о добродетельности разума, мужества, благородства. Его безнравственные притчи вызывали смех (Лк.16:1–14), а невиданное самовозвеличивание – праведный гнев (Ин.10:30–31). Он ни во что не ставил мнение большинства («Блаженны вы, когда будут поносить вас и гнать...» – (Матф.5:11), оскорблял религиозные чувства («предоставь мертвым погребать своих мертвецов» – (Матф.8:21–22) и устраивал погромы в Храме. Трудно представить общество, которое потерпело бы в своей среде малую долю такого смутьянства. Чтобы понять, что такое христианство, надо прежде всего не забывать, что учение Христа было осуждено не злодеями и преступниками, а поборниками нравственности и носителями высшей по тем временам религиозной идеи. С их точки зрения, Он пришел нарушить закон. Чтобы увидеть, что Он пришел «не нарушить» закон, «но исполнить» (Матф.5:17), надо было совершить богоборческий по своей форме акт отречения от «веры отцов» ради приобщения к внутреннему содержанию веры отца Авраама. По сути же этот акт был бы низвержением мертвых кумиров веры во имя встречи с Живым Богом.
"

Фёдор Козырев, "Поединок Иакова"



1 May, 2022

Хоть антисемитизм и считается правым радикальным движением, в его основании я вижу всё то же гнусное левачество: тягу отобрать у продуктивных и отдать бесполезным. Люди гневаются от осознания того, что евреи располагают большим количеством ресурсов, занимают высокие политические должности, управляют средствами массовой информации и контролируют финансовый сектор. Они чувствуют в этом страшную несправедливость. Достичь всего этого можно было лишь обманом, лишь злой и коварной хитростью. Ведь правда?

Что же, я предлагаю обсудить этот вопрос на языке боли, на языке унижения, на языке фактов.

Ещё задолго до основания Киева еврейское религиозное руководство уже требовало от каждого еврея вне зависимости от статуса научиться читать и понимать Тору.

Ещё задолго до средневекового мракобесия образованность уже позволяла евреям жить лучше большинства своих сограждан.

Ещё задолго до достижения уровня грамотности в 30% в Российской империи в XX веке евреи уже были известны всюду как мировые торговцы, банкиры, врачи, юристы.

Чувствуете несправедливость по отношению к себе? Вступайте в фонды борьбы с коррупцией, ей-Богу.



24 April, 2022

Світ переможе темряву, а краса переможе потворність.



14 April, 2022

Пока весь мир восторгается украинскими военными, что стоят на защите цивилизации от набегов бомжей-насильников, я салютую тем нескольким тысячам мужчин, что были задержаны на границе Украины в попытках её пересечь.

Не подвергаясь влиянию общественного мнения о том, как им жить и как умирать, не взирая на гнев разъярённой праведной толпы, вопреки бесчеловечности государственных законов они тоже пошли на риск ради своего лучшего будущего. Ради той же цели, ради которой рискуют жизнью на фронте, они решились рисковать своей свободой.

...

Будьте бдительны и не подвергайтесь ложной дихотомии. Проблемы украинского законодательства не оправдывают кремлевских террористов. Госдолг США не делает помойку на другом конце света менее зловонной. Плохость Германского рейха никоим образом не делает Советский Союз лучше — самое ужасное заблуждение последнего столетия.



12 April, 2022

Оруэлловский копрофильский боди-хоррор какой-то.

Хочешь лучшей жизни для себя и своей страны? Предатель. Радуешься скорой смерти соотечественников? Патриот.

Достоверно неизвестно, где умрёт больше русских: на фронте во время нападения или внутри страны во время растущей бедности.

Существует прямая зависимость продолжительности жизни от достатка. Бедность является первопричиной ранней смерти, хотя это никогда явно не указывается.

Причиной могут указать, например, алкогольное отравление. В России от связанных с алкоголем причин умирает 50,000 человек в год, от самоубийства 17,000, от передоза 8,000. Но почему такое происходит? Потому что бессознательные норовят убиваться на фоне низкого уровня жизни. Причиной могут указать, например, болезнь. От болезней умирают многие сотни тысяч в год. Но почему так? Потому что не хватает денег на качественное лечение и лекарства. Причиной могут указать удар ножом в тёмном переулке. Но произошёл он потому, что не хватает средств для жизни в благоприятном районе, а налоги пошли на ракеты вместо освещения улиц или иного благоустройства жизни.



3 April, 2022

Проблемы культуры, менталитета и ценностей очень важны. Иногда хочется думать, что во всех бедах виноват один-единственный человек, некий могущественный тиран, что сам раскулачивает многомилионный народ. К счастью, это некорректное упрощение.

При этом, как рыба неспособна осознать воду, культура для человека является пустым звуком, покуда он не изучает её глубоко и не сравнивает с другими. Например, пост-совковое пространство очень гордится тем, что, в отличии от гейропы, у них такие крепкие семейные ценности. Только вот среди всей Европы Россия занимает второе место по проценту неполноценных семей, и чем дальше на восток, тем больше в Европе совершается абортов.

Неспособность населения говорить ни на одном языке мира, кроме языка грубой силы, это, несомненно, очень плохо. Но меня уже давно удивляет и мучает менее заметная культурная проблема, о которой я хотел коротко рассказать. Это нормализация и даже романтизация воровства. Для меня это невероятная дикость и бóльшая глупость, чем попытки демонстрировать силу. Страна, где такое происходит, никогда в жизни не сможет стать развитой и богатой.

Я заинтересован в том, чтобы магазин рядом с моим домом получал прибыль и процветал. В таком случае я всегда смогу купить там продукты по низким ценам. Если же из магазина воровать, он закроется, и мне придётся ходить за продуктами дальше или платить больше. Я часто оставляю чаевые такси и доставке, потому что заинтересован в развитии этих сервисов и в увеличении количества таксистов и курьеров. Инвестиции могут быть и нематериальными. Я всегда вежлив, ведь в моих интересах качественное обслуживание и расположенность окружающих.

Паразитизм ничего не создаёт и является разрушительным в долгосрочной перспективе. Для достижения успеха, благополучия, изобилия каждый должен научиться приносить ценность, а также инвестировать в себя и в окружающий мир. Помогая другим, ты помогаешь себе. Когда хорошо всем вокруг тебя — тогда безвозвратно станет лучше и тебе самому.



29 March, 2022

Может быть, в будущем я подробнее опишу одну из причин, почему большинство русских так поддерживают отправку своих людей на убой, погружение своих жизней в нищету и превращение своих соседних регионов в руины (спойлер: культура и менталитет). А пока что демонстрирую вам разницу в реакции на одно и то же событие между англоговорящими и русскоговорящими.

Недавно Уилл Смит ударил ведущего церемонии "Оскар" за шутку про причёску его жены, подкрепив свой поступок криками и бранью. Перед вами комментарии под двумя самыми популярными на своём языке видео об этом на YouTube (запрещённая в России экстремистская организация).

Обращаю ваше внимание, что это всего-то либеральный YouTube. Во вконтактике и на прочих русских площадках гораздо больше конспирологии и призывов к насилию.

...

На русских площадках его действия поощряют, на английских — порицают.



24 March, 2022

Я люблю деньги. Тот-Кого-Нельзя-Называть тоже. Давайте посчитаем, сколько бы он заработал, если бы решил продать свой хлам, вместо того, чтобы целый месяц его разбрасывать.

Обычно аналоговнет оценивают в десятки миллионов долларов. Но мы прикинем реальные цены реальных покупателей. Например, Северной Кореи.

Самолёт: 101 штука по $800,000
Вертолёт: 124 штуки по $500,000
Корабль: 4 штуки по $80,000
Танк: 517 штук по $50,000
Система залпового огня: 80 штук по $10,000
Бронированная машина: 1578 штук по $5,000
Автомобиль: 1008 штук по $500
Артиллерия: 267 штук по $100
Экипированный солдат: 15600 штук по $10

101*800000+124*500000+4*80000+517*50000+80*10000+1578*5000+1008*500+267*100+15600*10 = $178346700

Далее поделим всё на 10, ведь потерьнет.

Даже с такой суммой можно было бы купить 24,943 аквадискотеки TONI ARTI 180x80 с гидромассажем по $715. Одну можно оставить себе, а оставшиеся 24,942 сложить друг на друга. Возведённая башня будет иметь высоту 14 километров 840 метров. Сам Боженька на небесах увидел бы, какая Россия великая.

...

Шутки в сторону, я сомневаюсь, что среднестатистический Иван осознаёт реальную цену ужасных решений. В его мире нужно будет всего-то затянуть пояс и сразиться за пачку сахара.

Привожу перевод занимательной статьи. Сегодня красноречие Google Translate меня испугало:

"

В 2015 году газета Moscow Times подсчитала, что каждый час полета российского военного самолета над Сирией стоил 12,000 долларов. Это больше, чем средняя годовая зарплата российского врача.

Считается, что крылатые ракеты «Калибры», запускаемые с линкоров в Черном море, стоят около 1.5 миллиона долларов каждая.

«Искандеры», основные ракеты, используемые российскими сухопутными войсками, производятся на Воткинском машиностроительном заводе к западу от Урала, который был приватизирован в 2010 году. Их стоимость оценивается примерно в 10 миллионов долларов за ракету.

По состоянию на 17 марта Министерство обороны США подсчитало, что российские войска выпустили по Украине 980 ракет, и подозревает, что у России может закончиться высокоточное оружие, поскольку у России исчерпан арсенал стоимостью в миллиарды долларов.

Каждая воронка на украинской земле — это дыра в российском бюджете.

По сообщениям, один российский танк Amarta стоит 8 миллионов долларов. Вертолет Камов Ка-52М стоит около 15 миллионов долларов. Даже если истинный ущерб составляет лишь половину того, что говорят украинцы, это уже другой счет на миллиарды.

И это еще до того, как мы поговорим о зарплатах и ​​припасах солдат, цене санкций и гибели тысяч молодых людей в стране со стареющим населением — одним из последствий хаоса 1990-х годов стал обвал рождаемости.

"

Судя по разным источникам, вся эта затея стоит России от $500,000,000 до $25,000,000,000 в день. Я сам поражён, как много можно высосать из недр земли и человеческого труда.

Если мы возьмём цену за месяц, это от 9 до 500 не построенных небоскрёбов Burj Khalifa, от 100,000 до 5,000,000 не вылеченных онкобольных, от 7,500 до 375,000 километров не проложенных магистралей.



13 March, 2022

"
Of course we want to help Ukraine, but what if it escalates to WWIII?!
Of course we want to help Taiwan, but what if it escalates to WWIII?!
Of course we want to help Poland, but what if it escalates to WWIII?!
Of course we want to help Japan, but what if it escalates to WWIII?!

Of course we want to stop the invasion of our country, but what if it escalates to WWIII?!
"

It is such a pathetic argument. The world should react swiftly to the expansion of a totalitarian plague exactly to prevent it from spreading into larger conflicts.



6 March, 2022

Этот пост я даже не стану публиковать вконтактике, ибо обзовут терроризмом.

Говорят, нельзя призывать к действию, если сам на это действие не пойдёшь. Абсолютный моралистический бред. Но я всё равно хотел бы рассказать, что бы я делал сам, если бы сейчас находился в России, а не был загнан на запад Украины и не был принуждён спускаться каждый день в бомбоубежище, чтобы прятаться от освободительных обстрелов.

Для начала напомню очевидное: любое действие имеет значение. Люди смиренно сидят и разводят руками: "я маленький человечек, ну что я смогу сделать?" — и с таким оправданием не делают вообще ничего. Жалкое зрелище. Из маленьких капель рождаются океаны и наполняются реки. Не притворяйтесь, что не понимаете этого.

Возможные действия для достижения любой цели всегда ограничиваются вашей фантазией. Сейчас, чтобы работать в сторону прекращения геноцида русских и украинцев, без особого риска вы можете осуждать военные действия в социальных сетях, кидать жалобы на пропагандистские аккаунты, делиться правдой со знакомыми, друзьями, родственниками, незнакомцами, общаться с ними и склонять их к действию, дудосить государственные сайты, выводить рубли и менять их на валюту, обращаться к компаниям, блогерам, медийным личностям с просьбой публично высказаться, кидать мамочкам фотографии того, во что превращаются их послушные Ванечки, спамить на почту и в мессенжеры, расклеивать агитационные наклейки и плакаты, продвигать здравый контент других людей, перечислять деньги оппозиции, украинской армии, гуманитарной помощи, высмеивать Zaднеприводных и Vротберущих, разбивать машины с фашистской символикой, подписывать петиции, обращаться в Твиттере к мировым организациям, лепить и распространять мемы, помогать в организации протестов.

Конечно, если у вас есть особенные рычаги влияния, нужно их использовать: отказываться доставлять военную технику и топливо к границе, увольняться с государственных должностей, приводить в непригодность всё, что может быть использовано для военных преступлений.

Если вы серьёзный и решительный дядя с военным опытом, вероятно, наиболее действенным будет приехать в Украину и сражаться против этой чумы бок о бок с сотнями других волонтёров со всего мира. Чем быстрее зомбированные освободители уходят в землю, тем меньше желания освобождать у оставшихся в живых. Каждый человек должен рисковать своей жизнью исключительно по собственному желанию. Мы этого желания, к сожалению, не видим ни среди части оккупантов, ни среди мирных жителей городов под обстрелами.

Что бы делал лично я? Как минимум я бы продолжил делать то, чем и так давно занимаюсь. Я бы продолжил изливать здравый смысл на бумаге и выставлять это на публичное обозрение. Также со стократной интенсивностью я бы продолжил влиять на ситуацию всеми относительно безопасными методами — свободного времени было бы полно, так как работы у меня всё равно уже не будет.

Я также склонен и к более радикальным методам. Я бы пробовал поджигать государственные здания коктейлями Молотова или иначе. Я бы пробовал находить дома работников силовых структур и разбивать им окна камнями. Далеко не все силовики живут в дворцах за высоким забором. Никаких записок привязывать к камням не нужно – они сами всё прекрасно поймут. Если не тупить, такие методы одновременно и безопаснее, и эффективнее, чем стоять с плакатом и ждать пока тебя увезут.

И действовал бы я прямо сейчас, потому что, во-первых, естественно, гибнут десятки тысяч людей. А во-вторых, временное окно, когда можно что-то изменить, может скоро закрыться. Риторика Путина может скоро измениться. Он начнёт рассказывать, как потрясающе сильнейшая армия мира самопровозглашённой сверхдержавы (с ВВП в два раза меньше ВВП всего одного штата в США) надавала плохим нацикам-биндерам, после чего вернёт остатки послушного пушечного мяса в Россию для укрепления своей власти. И если сейчас не расшатывать эту систему, вскоре на страну может опуститься такой железный занавес, что люди начнут молиться, чтобы на них напали цивилизованные страны, но окажется, что Россия никому не нужна.



1 March, 2022

Я всегда поражался тому, как много страданий русский народ способен молча стерпеть. Но прямо сейчас ситуация особенно наглядная, плачевная, болезненная, смертельная. И мне трудно представить, что необходимо внушать себе, чтобы продолжать молчать.

Предположим, вы не любите военных. Я тоже их не люблю. Хотя и странно желать им смерти. Предположим, вы ненавидите украинцев и вас забавляют мысли об их страдании. Какое-то больное извращение, но сейчас не об этом. Сейчас я не взываю к жалости и не надеюсь на развитую эмпатию тех, кто постоянно подвергался домашнему насилию.

Сейчас в этой ситуации по-настоящему отвратительно то, что большая часть населения не принимает абсолютно никаких действий для того, чтобы остановить падение уровня своей собственной жизни в болотную вонючую яму. Даже часть моих любимых друзей в России отказываются сделать хоть что-то, прекрасно понимая, что власть действует против их интересов.

Большинство надеются спокойно и послушно пересидеть резню, что в соседнем доме.

Но спокойно пересидеть эту катастрофу не получится ни у кого. Кто-то больше не сможет покупать импортную технику и лекарства. Кто-то больше не посмотрит зарубежные фильмы в кинотеатрах. Кто-то больше не увидит своего сына, брата, отца, мужа, друга. Кто-то привыкший оплачивать картой начнёт носить рубли. Кто-то желавший уехать за границу останется дома. Кто-то работавший в айти-аутсорсинге пойдёт на завод. Кто-то инвестировавший в фондовый рынок также пойдёт на завод — всех поставят клепать автоматы для войны против себя и против всего мира.

...

Когда не стерпел и отважился заговорить:

Мир не делится на чёрное и белое! Все великие лодки исторически имели много дыр! Вопрос слишком комплексный для диванных аналитиков! Нас вынудили сделать эту дыру! Во всём виновата проклятая вода! Эти аналогии в корне отличаются от реальной ситуации!

...

Кто я такой, чтобы трактовать страдание? Разве страдают те, кто смеются и просят ещё?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=igpqj0bjAnM



1 March, 2022

Если моя страница вк станет недоступна, я смогу продолжить делиться своими мыслями тут:

https://diurnsky.com/ 

Диванные кремлеботы сейчас люто кибер-атакуют каждого, кто пытается остановить войну.

Понять этих сумасшедших трудно, но у меня есть предположение. В этом конфликте они хотят любой ценой "одержать победу" над "вражеским" государством, предполагая, что после этого прекратятся все страдания и последуют радость, процветание и признание мирового сообщества.

Далеко не все понимают, что победа в войне всегда очень условная. История уже знает случаи, когда "проигравшие" отстраивали свои дворцы из руин, прекраснее, чем когда-либо, а "победившие", поджав хвост, возвращались в свою облезлую конуру, чтобы продолжить лизать сапоги хозяина и кушать то, что нальют в корыто. 

В конечном счёте сила государства не в его войсках, и даже не в его правительстве. Сила государства в его людях.



27 February, 2022

Открыто выражая свою ненависть и презрение к российской тиранической власти, не боясь защищаться и говорить правду, Украина уже давно помогает россиянам иметь шанс на лучшее будущее. Сейчас же, как никогда раньше, жителям России необходимо научиться самим постоять за себя.

Множество русских солдат погибли вскоре после приказа пересечь границу и начать вторжение. Но гораздо больше из них ещё можно спасти. Если вам наплевать на жизни других людей, возможно, вам не наплевать на свою. А если так, вы не можете позволить себе невежество и знаете, чего стоит эта война даже для самого мирного жителя России.

Почти не осталось тех, кто отчаянно надеется, что весь мир (вне кремлеСМИ) врёт, и что некомпетентное правительство вот-вот всех переиграет и начнёт делиться изобилием триумфа с народом. Однако, этого мало. "Каждый народ достоин своего правителя" говорят потому, что для существования абсолютно любому правителю и государству неизбежно нужна поддержка.

Сейчас то самое время, когда необходимо перестать робко притворяться, что вас это не касается. Сейчас то самое время, когда необходимо перестать внушать себе, что ваши действия, сколь угодно малые, не имеют значения.

...

Кажется, я погорячился, когда сказал, что почти никто не думает телевизором вместо головы. Я живу в культурном пузыре и даже русскоязычную информацию потребляю редко. Иногда мне тяжело понять, что у обывателей в голове.



14 February, 2022

День святого Валентина всегда был моим любимым праздником.

Сегодня и вовек я запрещаю вам оставаться холодными и ядовитыми. Используйте вежливые слова и ласковые прозвища. Извиняйтесь первыми. Предлагайте помощь. Замечайте хорошее.

...

Только представьте, если бы вместо маленького вонючего человека и его маленьких вонючих проблем в школьной программе было "Как завоёвывать друзей" Дейла Карнеги.

...

Одна книга не решит все проблемы, конечно. Я постоянно наблюдаю тех, чем организм просто не способен переваривать идеи, возносящие социум на качественно новый уровень. В частности, идеи американской self-help литературы. Заводские настройки диктуют им, что улыбаться во время общения — это манипуляция и лицемерие.



12 February, 2022

На фоне последних событий хотелось бы напомнить очевидное: никто не обязан рисковать своей жизнью и убивать людей ради того, чтобы кто-то платил налоги одним правителям, а не другим.

Каждый имеет право защищать себя от государства, что заставляет воевать. Я не советую кусать руку хозяина, когда тебя уже заковали в цепь и лишили зубов. Достаточно перестать исполнять команды, надеясь получить объедки.



3 February, 2022

Почему они не улыбаются на своих фотографиях? Они напоминают нам о рецепте для изготовления всех волшебников: магия, безумие, печаль.



28 January, 2022

Работодатель: платит тебе минимальную зарплату.
Ты: прилагаешь минимальные усилия (справедливо ✊🏿).
Работодатель: увольняет тебя.
Ты: So That's Another Reason We Need Communism.

https://youtu.be/dqB-EMqpsUA?t=113



22 January, 2022

Когда слушаешь Летова
5 часов: "Да это же просто тупой набор слов!"
50 часов: "Вообще-то тут очень глубокий смысл. Вот тут осторожно осуждается советская власть, а здесь красочно описана трагедия человеческой жизни."
500 часов: "Да это же просто тупой набор слов!"



30 December, 2021

Множество людей ненавидят Бога потому, что он являлся им слишком мало. Но сколько людей ненавидят Бога потому, что он являлся им слишком много?

...

Множество людей слепы потому, что никогда не искали Его. Но сколько людей слепы потому, что однажды нашли?

Current Value - Faith



December 21, 2021

"Я никогда не опущусь до вебкама", — говорит нам особь с букетом венерических после первого партнёра, дцп-дауном ребёнком после второго, и порванной маткой после третьего. Культура плебеев диктует, что демонстрировать красоту тела порицательно плохо. Не дайте ей себя одурачить. Девушка из OnlyFans может быть грамотнее вас не только финансово. И чище вас не только нравственно.



November 27, 2021

Пирамида капитализма: как это видят унтерменши и как это происходит на самом деле.

Карикатуру назвали "Пирамида капиталистической системы", игнорируя тот факт, что капитализма в ней меньше половины. Эта экономическая система не описывает "правительство, религию, армию" и не подразумевает наличие центрального управления. Более того, основные принципы капитализма — частная собственность и добровольная торговля — противоречат природе государства.

Почему, несмотря на эту абсурдность, "Пирамида капиталистической системы" 1911 года выдержала испытание временем и до сих пор популярна? Потому что им всё равно, что такое капитализм на самом деле. Всё, что они знают, всё, что они изображают, это ненависть к тем, кто лучше их, это неравенство, которое капитализм не стремится исправить.

Им бы стоило испытывать ненависть к тем, кто насильственными методами запрещает делать одно и заставляет делать другое. Вместо этого они жаждут большего насилия ради удовлетворения своих извращённых желаний, главное из которых — заставлять продуктивных отдавать ресурсы бесполезным. Они предпочтут все сгореть на солнце, чем нежиться в тени чужого успеха.

https://www.youtube.com/embed/xbJ0aAKd0fg



November 22, 2021

Какую музыку я бы мог слушать до Интернета? В основном выбор был между группами, исполняющими вонючий еее рок. И хотя хорошие жанры и исполнители существовали уже несколько поколений до меня, боюсь, без Интернета никто бы о них никогда не узнал из бездны глухого украинского села-миллионика.

Мне казалось, Интернет освобождает от оков безвкусицы избранное меньшинство: пока я изучал lolicore и martial industrial, мои одноклассники максимум увидели, что помимо условной Арии есть условный Linkin Park. Я рад наблюдать, что я ошибался. Наконец-то из блютус-колонок школьников я слышу trap metal, k-pop и hyperpop.

Воспитывать детей онлайн было гениальной идеей.



November 21, 2021

Качества познаются в сравнении. Ты не ощущаешь презрения к грязи, когда вся твоя жизнь — грязь.

Если желаешь увидеть красоту, будь готов узреть и уродство.



November 18, 2021

Три мучительных часа добро со злом сражались за право обладать моим сердцем. Конечно, добро победило. Но сейчас меня тревожат сомнения: кто из близнецов был добром?



November 15, 2021

Плакалка.

Девочки, что много плачут, как вам такое прозвище? По-моему мило.



November 11, 2021

Нет, мы не похожи. Тебе нужен легалайз, чтобы овощем корчиться в промокшей постели. Мне нужен легалайз, чтобы от передоза умирало больше людей. Мне нужен легалайз, чтобы перестать стоять на пути у естественного отбора.



November 8, 2021

Не знаю как у вас, а у меня фид вк до отказа забит рекламой трейдинга. Существует одно-единственное видео, которое необходимо посмотреть, чтобы начать хорошо разбираться в этой теме: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qhHOmZVAqBE

Too long; didn't watch: не занимайтесь трейдингом.



November 7, 2021

Что может быть хуже для родителя, что старается изо всех сил, чем быть для своего ребёнка посмешищем или мучительным позором?

Что может быть лучше для родителя, что старается изо всех сил, чем быть для своего ребёнка посмешищем или мучительным позором?



November 3, 2021

Louvre Abu Dhabi.

Ко-ко-ко, постмодернистская архитектура убога, ко-ко-ко. — Это говорят все и всегда, это мы уже слышали.

Ко-ко-ко, государству следует запретить богатым строить то, что нравится им, и заставить их строить то, что нравится нам, ко-ко-ко. — Казалось бы, не говорит никто. Пока мы не увидим, как радостно люд встречает новые законы, ограничивающие то или иное строительство.



October 22, 2021

Зим восемь назад я сонно топал в лицей на занятия. Метель так приятно убаюкивала, и каждый сугроб выглядел так уютно. Я очень хотел, но увы не смог позволить себе опоздать и сладко уснуть в одном из сугробов.

Тринадцатого января этого года был тяжёлый снегопад, и в этот раз мне ничего не мешало осуществить мой замысел. В четыре утра я оделся очень тепло и вышел искать укромное место. Но куда бы я не пошёл, в моём воображении меня уязвимого находили бездомные и разбивали мне голову кирпичом.

Вы знали, что неудачное стечение обстоятельств в нечеловеческих условиях капитализма как основная причина потери дома — это бесстыдный миф? В США, где осознают важность сбора статистики, известно, что треть бездомных тяжело психически больны, и две трети имеют наркотическую, алкогольную или другие зависимости.

Мне незачем спешить. Ещё зим восемь, и метель сможет меня убаюкивать в безопасности двора моего дома или на открытой крыше нормальной высотки.

...

Что может быть прекраснее, чем быть усыплённым морозным ветром и укрытым одеялом из снега? Быть может только спать с кем-то очень хорошим в обнимку.



October 9, 2021

Представьте, что самый прекрасный в вашем понимании город на самом деле настолько отвратительный, что приезжие испытывают шок настолько сильный, что лечащие их врачи вводят новый термин для описания недуга.

Парижский синдром — тяжелая форма культурного шока, замечаемая среди японцев и других туристов из восточной Азии, посещающих столицу Франции.

Термин придумали в 80-х. Сейчас всё гораздо хуже.

https://www.youtube.com/embed/56b_rmUHUg4

...

Красивые люди возводят красивые города. Но уродцев больше, и их уродливое мнение у всех на слуху. Вы всё ещё ссылаетесь на их уродливые рейтинги?



September 4, 2021

"... Как минимум с 2018 года мне было известно, что один из моих телефонных номеров был включен в список потенциальных целей таких инструментов наблюдения (хотя источник из NSO Group это отрицает). Лично меня это не беспокоило: с 2011 года, когда я ещё жил в России, я привык предполагать, что все мои телефоны взломаны."

— Павел Дуров в своём Telegram канале.

Вести себя так, будто за вами пристально наблюдают, может быть полезно. Придётся чаще задаваться вопросом законности ваших действий. Худшим из нас не захочется заниматься чем-то криминальным. Однако, наивно полагать, что ваша правильность и открытость помешает людям при власти сломать вам жизнь. От этого не застрахованы даже те, кто имеют широкое признание, хорошее образование, армию адвокатов — если являются политической оппозицией.

Согласно писателю и адвокату Харви Сильверглейту, неосознанно американцы совершают преступления каждый день. Правил становится всё больше и их всё сложнее однозначно интерпретировать. С помощью такой системы проще устранить неугодных. Но в США, например, всем известно, что нельзя (самому) давать показания полиции. "Всё, что вы скажете, может и будет использовано против вас в суде." Было бы гораздо проще находить выдуманные нарушения, если бы узаконили тотальный надзор.

Здорово было бы позволить за собой слежку во имя избавления человечества от преступности? Вам скажут даже, что это необходимо для выживания цивилизации. Сезонно всё больший контроль оправдывается государствами драматизированными угрозами. То терроризм, то война, то пандемия. Я до сих пор поражаюсь, как много свободы человечество отдало последний раз. Штрафы и аресты за отказ носить маску, несоблюдение дистанции, прогулку в парке. Запрет покидать страну, лишение твоей работы, закрытие твоего бизнеса. И сейчас часть свобод предлагают вернуть, если начнёшь принимать препараты и ходить с удостоверяющими документами.

https://www.youtube.com/embed/chqkr3eLsgc

...

Если вам меньше 40 лет и с маской вы чувствуете себя безопаснее, чем с ремнём безопасности — поздравляю, вы хорошие граждане. Ваши лидеры вами гордятся.

Даже суицид в этом возрасте опаснее короны. Так что лучше берегите свою душу (и психическое здоровье), котята.

https://archive.md/fIQYY

...

На самом деле мне плевать, насколько угроза опасна. Будь смертность меньше 1%, как у короны, или 50%, как у Чёрного мора, или 100%, как у электрического стула (который всё же приходится иногда включать-выключать на протяжении 20 минут или даже заменять на другой https://archive.md/1WG0e). Я не стану защитником пресечения индивидуальных свобод. Человек сам вправе решать на какой риск идти и какие меры предосторожности принимать. Но абсурдность нынешней ситуации может заставить задуматься людей, что вообще способны думать.



August 27, 2021

Восстановление справедливости — это очень просто.

1. Отбираем у богатых и возвращаем людям то, что им принадлежит по праву ✊🏿
2. Празднуем!
3. ...
4. А где вся еда в супермаркетах?



August 15, 2021

Я люблю: кишки, сколопендр, ножи, Бога, детей, насилие, учиться.



August 12, 2021

"You want to end suffering? What are you, gay?"

— Q, The Book Club.

...

Fun facts:
1. Q made a review of "The Fourth Political Theory" by Aleksandr Dugin.
2. Paul Joseph Watson watches Q's videos and left a comment here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FYycI5xsfvE



August 12, 2021

Конечно, государство не поджидает человека в безлюдном месте, не прыгает на него с обочины и, держа пистолет у его головы, не приступает рыскать по его карманам. Но его грабёж тем не менее является грабежом, и гораздо более подлым и постыдным.

Преступник исключительно на себя берёт ответственность, опасность и преступность своего собственного действия. Он не притворяется, что имеет законное право на твои деньги, или что он намерен использовать их для твоего же блага. Он не выдаёт себя за кого-либо, кроме грабителя. Он не набрался наглости достаточной для того, чтобы изображать, что он лишь "защитник", и что он забирает деньги людей против их воли лишь для того, чтобы иметь возможность "защитить" увлечённых путников, что чувствуют, что сами прекрасно способны себя защитить, или что не признают его особую систему защиты. Он слишком благоразумен, чтобы изображать подобное. Более того, забрав твои деньги, он покидает тебя, как ты того и хочешь. Он не продолжает преследовать тебя по дороге против твоей воли, предполагая, что является твоим законным сувереном по причине "защиты", что он тебе предоставляет. Он не продолжает "защищать" тебя, командуя кланяться и служить ему; требуя сделать это и запрещая делать то; отбирая у тебя больше денег настолько часто, насколько ему выгодно и приятно это делать; и выставляя тебя мятежником, предателем и врагом твоей страны, и отстреливая тебя без жалости, если ты оспоришь его полномочия или воспротивишься его требованиям. Он слишком джентльмен, чтобы грешить подобным самозванством, и оскорблениями, и мерзостями подобно этим. Словом, в придачу к ограблению он не принимает попыток сделать из тебя простофилю или своего раба.

— Ханс-Херман Хоппе, "Демократия: Несостоявшийся Бог"

...

Ханс, когда псы из наркоконтроля увидели, как я кидаю "подозрительные" фантики в урну, людность места им не помешала и они прыгнули на меня и приступили рыскать не только по моим карманам, но в моём телефоне. Государствам стран третьего мира пока ещё не приходится притворяться доблестными защитниками.

...

Который раз я поражаюсь качеству англо-русского перевода. "The God That Failed" перевели как "Низвергнутый Бог", что, конечно, имеет совсем другой смысл. А приведённого отрывка в найденном мной переводе вообще не было.

...

— Ты что, наркоман? Хочешь прижмём к земле и почитаем твои переписки в телеграме? Глаза в пол и быстрым шагом по прямой!



August 4, 2021

Брадатые викинги прекрасно смотрятся покоряющими не только океан, но и космос. Мне нравится видеть их в сай-фае, но интереснее всего то, что их везде преследует одна судьба. Кристен Холден-Рид был предателем в Vikings — и стал предателем в The Expanse. Трэвис Фиммел волей случая оказался лидером в Vikings — и это же случилось в Raised by Wolves. Если это не доказательство вечного возвращения Ницше, то я не знаю что.

...

Есть легендарные фильмы и т.п., пылящиеся годами в вочлисте, а есть Raised by Wolves, который бежишь смотреть как только увидел пару кадров без контекста.



August 2, 2021

Русские кладбища могут остаться интересным культурным наследием, но человеку в ясном уме вряд ли захочется оказаться на поросшей сорняком железно-каменной свалке среди всратых фотографий.

Когда я был маленький, я хотел, чтобы после смерти меня кремировали. Сейчас я повзрослел, поумнел. Теперь я хочу, чтобы после смерти меня съели.



July 23, 2021

Как я просыпаюсь, когда мне снится, что надо мной кто-то стоит, а у меня сонный паралич.

https://www.youtube.com/embed/itKq_Qg-MHM



July 7, 2021

оооООО! Моя оборона! Солнечный зайчик стеклянного глаза! оооООО! Моя оборона! Мраморный дятел летящего шлюза! Зрелищный крестик осеннего писка! Траурный трупик советского газа! Фирменный ножик уютного рока! Жизненный выбор июльского вора! Праведный мальчик молочного джаза! Кризисный химик сидящего среза! Свадебный ветер бегущего сока! Правильный лучник кромешного газа! Крошечный химик безмолвного мора! Траурный тазик тягучего глаза! Траурный облик удобного стыка! Почвенный лётчик удобного внука! Скошенный ворон этичного писка! Сыгранный кролик бегущего лома! Ветренный щебет дешёвого воска! Приторный садик трущобного среза! Выцветший ящик сидящего мозга! Солнечный ропот безмолвного панка! Красочный цикл навозного цирка! Ломанный лётчик массивного вора! Ветренный лучик колючего мира! Крохотный физик эпичного бара! Пристальный сыщик уставшего панка! Выцветший зайчик убогого пира! Косвенный карлик сезонного воска! Тыквенный ящик парадного сока! Сломленный сгусток упавшего бога! Праведный слоник молочного крюка! Свадебный ротик картонного панка! Пятничный шарик трущобного мрака! Хвалебный шарик смышлёного писка! Маленький сыщик горючего носа! Приторный молот удобного хлора! Кризисный вирус собачьего крика! Маленький ножик лежащего мозга! Жизненный медик шипучего бара! Ломанный лучник нейронного бара! Правильный зайчик стеклянного сока! Снежистый химик безмолвного хлора! Тыквенный мусор безмолвного рока! Крошечный датчик осеннего таза! Смазочный ропот забвенного пира! Сыгранный зайчик вонючего крика! Крохотный щебет изящного шлюза! Тыквенный ослик шипучего люка! Пристальный вызов нелепого хора! Красочный выбор картонного сока! Жизненный ломтик июльского блюза! Сказочный крестик тягучего хора! Связанный нытик дешёвого мозга! Свадебный физик нелепого бога! Сломленный хрящик овечьего воска! Греческий пёсик забвенного мрака! Каменный датчик уставшего бара! Выцветший ослик бегущего брака! Почвенный облик привычного шлюза! Слизистый ворон горючего писка! Правильный вызов массивного цирка! Ломанный гномик кавказского крюка! Греческий трупик старейшего звука! Смазочный хрящик весеннего газа! Крохотный ящик удобного внука! Почвенный котик стоящего мира! Красочный крестик весеннего звука! Мизерный носик первичного бога! Ломанный лётчик привычного пира! Сыгранный зайчик этичного хора! Каменный химик сидящего полка! Снежистый голод осеннего воска! Свадебный вызов картонного крика! Приторный мальчик сезонного звука! Сумрачный дождик тягучего писка! Смазочный мальчик собачьего рока! Правильный котик хрустального пира! Пряничный зайчик везучего воска! Траурный дятел румынского груза! Солнечный дождик забытого мира! Почвенный цикл горючего хлора! Жизненный кустик навозного груза! Греческий ножик парадного носа! Ветренный лётчик колючего вора! Ломанный хрящик лежащего пира! Сыгранный лучик стоящего рока! Пристальный сыщик убогого мира! Слизистый вызов древнейшего полка! Пряничный лучник молочного пира! Сказочный ротик собачьего писка! Крохотный вирус смышлёного звука! Приторный выдох смышлёного мора! Сломленный физик навозного шлюза! Солнечный ящик могучего крюка! Мраморный ослик безмолвного газа! Ветренный тазик изящного воска! Пламенный лучник последнего мира! Жреческий голод уютного панка! Маленький хрящик молочного крика! Хвалебный химик изящного глаза! Красочный носик сыпучего полка! Сорванный выбор могучего мира!



July 5, 2021

А вы тоже просыпаетесь с покусанными щеками? С кровоточащим языком? С онемевшими руками, с вывернутыми лодыжками. Со сломанными рёбрами и лопнувшими органами.



June 27, 2021

Учителя удивлялись моей беспомощности. Если у меня не было ручки или чернил, я сидел и плакал.

Я видел, как играли мои сверстники. Ребята щупали девушек. Но я мечтал о высокой любви, как в кино и книгах.

Я дал себе клятву никого не трогать, кроме своей будущей жены.

Слезы обиды душили меня всю жизнь.

Я сотрясение мозга переносил не раз, и меня расстреливали и убивали.

Сидишь голодный в окно смотришь, плачешь.

Зачем меня Бог послал на эту землю?

Я почувствовал, что если девочка закричит громче, то у меня начнется наслаждение. Я стал её больно щипать.

Первое убийство напугало и сконфузило меня, но после второго я испытал ликование и радость.

Я специально не ловил и не искал жертв. Просто случайно попадались такие же, как я. Многие из них голодные, выбитые из жизненной колеи, неблагополучные в жизненных ситуациях. И они ко мне прилипали.

Выдержать их взгляды невозможно.

Я никого не жалел.



June 14, 2021

Очень трудно поверить, что человек, пришедший на концерт, одетый как неформал, пытающийся танцевать, действительно слушает нойз или индустриальную музыку вообще, а не практикует свою эджевость.

А) Если какие танцы здесь и приемлемы, то это "кома", "ступор", "дискинезия", или "судорожный припадок".

Б) Ценители такой музыки одеваются просто, иногда слишком просто, иногда с элементами строгости. Откуда я знаю? Посмотрите на тех, кто эту музыку создаёт.

https://www.youtube.com/embed/gHFwn68Pc0Y



June 3, 2021

Удивительно, как много человеческой культуры построено на даунской логике ассоциаций (эффект Барнума, соционика, графология, астрология, нумерология, приметы). Иногда они даже не требуются, и случайным вещам приписываются случайные свойства.

Карл Юнг описывал случай, когда пациент испытывал реальные симптомы горной болезни, ибо он витал в облаках, добивался высокого статуса, и взбирался вверх по карьерной лестнице. Интересно, как бы Юнг объяснил причину недуга, если бы в его языке не было подобных метафор.

Даже образованным людям глубоко свойственна тяга к мистическому (смелые психосоматические теории можно сюда отнести), и я не выступаю за подавление этой тяги. Но и удовлетворять её можно по-разному. Использование народных суеверий граничит со слабоумием, а моралистические религии плодят вину, обиду, страх.

Здравый теизм может быть лишён негативных побочных эффектов и проявляться для конфидента лишь в превосходном ощущении себя вне зависимости от обстоятельств.



May 5, 2021

Основная функция сайта diurnsky.com — быть резервной копией моего профиля vk.com/l6w9l. А ниже будет всё, что только может находиться на странице "About".

Жалко будет потерять все свои записи, но я могу выделить и другие причины для создания этого сайта:

- В случае утери страницы сохранить часть людей, которых я не знаю, но которым я по какой-то причине интересен.
- Попробовать создать блог в принципе. Оказалось нетрудно и почти бесплатно.
- Иметь потенциал для новых возможностей. На собственном сайте можно реализовать что-угодно. Например, очень красиво смотрится галерея картинок на весь экран: https://diurnsky.com/favorites.html

Поясню неочевидные ярлыки моего мировоззрения.

Теизм.

Когда я слышу вопросы про веру в Бога, для меня это звучит так же глупо, как если бы спросили про веру в свет или веру в воздух. Ведь Бог есть всё, и достаточно верить в существование всего. Нужно уметь задавать правильные вопросы. Вопрос следующий: готов ли я отречься от громадного пласта человеческой культуры, от нуминозного, от сакрального, от давящего чувства, что Вселенная работает по неизвестным тонким законам? Точно нет. Потому я более не могу называться агностиком.

Сингулярианство.

Я верю, что научно-технический прогресс это потрясающе, но я не верю в человека. В определении термина "сингулярианство" обычно упоминают использование сингулярности на благо человечества. Это необязательно. Я, пожалуй, не против, чтобы люди продолжали плодиться. Однако, в какой-то момент улучшать человека будет так же непродуктивно, как одевать мышей в костюм железного человека. Я хочу видеть более достойного кандидата.

Моральный нигилизм.

Это тесно связано с либертарианством и это не стоит путать с анти-моральностью и имморализмом. У меня не возникает тяги осудить, наказать, перевоспитать, что есть суть морализма. Мне всё равно, чем занимаются другие, покуда они не покушаются на чужую волю и не портят жизнь безвольным.

Полиамория.

Я признаю, что любить больше одного человека нормально. Я допускаю принятие человека в интимные отношения, когда все участники этих отношений действительно того хотят. Хотя на практике такая ситуация и невозможна для здоровой гетеросексуальной пары. А ещё в термине присутствует слово amor, что намекает на наличие любви в отношениях, в противовес серийной моногамии.

Боди-негатив.

Боди-позитив говорит, что ты здорова и прекрасна какая есть. Люби себя, расслабься и наслаждайся, в разнообразии наша красота. Я же считаю, что тела отвратительны, над ними нужно работать, пороки не делают тебя красивым, к прекрасному идеалу необходимо стремиться.

Хоть я и не стараюсь подстроиться под современные взгляды дегенеративных масс, я не ищу врагов и ко всем отношусь хорошо. Моя личка всегда открыта, мой чёрный список пуст. Если я могу быть чем-то полезен, дайте мне знать.



May 5, 2021

Самая расистская, сексистская, гомофобская и так далее вещь в мире — это статистика.



April 6, 2021

Если твоё сердце не горит бушующим пламенем преисподней, ты, должно быть, безнадёжно слеп, беспросветно спишь, или давным-давно мёртв.



March 8, 2021

Стало интересно насколько простота законов помогает стране развиваться. Это комплексный вопрос, но я наблюдаю, что есть ощутимая негативная корреляция между количеством слов в Конституции и ВВП на душу населения: меньше слов - больше ВВП.



March 4, 2021

Запомните, ублюдки, сукины дети. Перед вами человек, которому всё надоело. И он начал борьбу с грязью, развратом, дерьмом, собаками, мразью, срамом. Наконец такой человек нашелся. Вам конец.



February 28, 2021

Я помню, как терпеть не мог, когда взрослые общались между собой нормально, а со мной говорили, как умственно отсталые. Вспоминайте себя и прекращайте кривляться.

https://www.youtube.com/embed/sev_bbHNGg0



February 19, 2021

You were free. You had no god. But you tried to build one. Only that thing you built isn't God. The real gods are coming. And they're very angry.



February 19, 2021

virgin privacy protectors: ааааа не смотри на мои фоточки семпай ///////
chad privacy neglectors: привет, я трахаю д****, вот видео процесса, голосуй за меня



February 14, 2021

Я люблю русский язык. С его помощью можно передать множество оттенков. Вместе с тем очевидно, что русский язык — инструмент (для) печальных неудачников. И это проявляется на всех уровнях. Опустим сейчас слова, и выражения, и народные "мудрости". Обратим внимание на более сознательные преступления. Сейчас я снова вспомнил, и снова вознегодовал, пуще прежнего, фразу из работы Булгакова: "Никогда и ничего не просите! Никогда и ничего, и в особенности у тех, кто сильнее вас. Сами предложат и сами все дадут!"

Это очень плохой совет и просто удар по здравому смыслу. Это диаметрально противоположно тому, что советуют успешные и счастливые люди. А что нам говорит Иисус? "Просите, и дано будет вам; ищите, и найдете; стучите, и отворят вам". Подавлять свою волю — космический грех. Ожидать от этого действа подачек сверху полное безумие.

И они обожают это изречение. Быть может, виноват не автор, быть может, виноваты те, кто добровольно положили это откровение под язык и рассасывают его по своему телу и по русскоговорящему миру как прикладную истину. Быть может, в истории Булгакова всё имеет другой, скрытый смысл. Ведь это слова Воланда, Дьявола. Но так это не работает. В конечном счёте людской организм расщепит всё на атомы для усвоения. И потому в аффирмациях нельзя использовать "Я не болею". Вместо этого говорят "Я здоров!"

Выражайте свои желания, просите безвозмездной помощи, требуйте от жизни неприлично много, требуйте от себя безгранично больше, предлагайте помощь и исполняйте желания, не ожидая ничего взамен.



February 11, 2021

Постарался найти 10 своих самых любимых песен. Как оказалось, большую часть своих любимых песен я находил ещё 8 лет назад: https://www.last.fm/user/Nosense_/loved?page=7

Это наводит на разные мысли.

1. goreshit - beautiful loli thing
2. Revenge of the Titans - Xmas
3. Salem - Asia
4. Coil - Triple Sun
5. Unreal - Сверхмашина
6. Tactical Sekt - Damage Limitation
7. Donny & Current Value - Drill
8. Amia Venera Landscape - Nicholas
9. Xasthur - The Prison Of Mirrors
10. Astral & Shit - pos



February 10, 2021

что интересно быдло-мужикам:
машинки
футбольчик
что интересно быдло-бабам:
как стать стервой
как стать больной истеричкой
как стать аутичной жертвой н@сильников папочек
как стать стильной спидозной amputee козерогом дцп дауном глицин ведьмой



February 1, 2021

Слова прошлого поста я нашёл в глубинах личных сообщений самому себе. Тогда я причёсывал машинно-сгенерированный текст до вразумительных форм. Сам бы я такого не сочинил. Удивительная глубина безумия. Дождёмся ли мы часа, когда всё высочайшее искусство будет создаваться машинами?

Там есть и другие зарисовки, недостойные отдельного поста.

* * *

Я смеюсь в лицо смерти, боли, войны, нищеты, болезни. Я танцую на костях убитых мучеников. Я несу на своих плечах богов и дарю им своё бессмертие.

* * *

Лучше один раз увидеть сохры/репосты/подписки, чем десять раз услышать рассказы человека о себе. Страницы социальных сетей лучше представляют человека, чем внешность и одежда.

* * *

Забота о ступнях сексуальна потому что наиболее лишена похоти. Это то влечение, которое понятно даже детям. Ножки берут на себя очень много, но, в отличии от лица или вагины, зачастую остаются совсем без внимания.

* * *

я думаю. а что если вместо Диурнский поменять на Диурнски

* * *

С чего ты взял, что мне нужны твои редстоуны, сука?
С чего ты взял, что мне нужна твоя тупая печка?
С чего ты, блять, решил, что это был просто крипер?
Нет больше сил, просто съебись, я, видимо, правда грифер.

* * *

You: pray to Him for you not getting hurt.
We: give our lives to protect Him.
?

* * *

shit and I was like whaaat. like fucking bitch and real shit. what. sesh

You've just witnessed the very first words of an AI that was learning from humans for a year. Absolutely magnificent.

* * *

Временами уровень моего сострадания достигает такого абсурда, что выбирая между плохим и хорошим товаром на полке хороший, мне становится жалко плохой. Это при том, что моё сердечко спокойно при мыслях о войне и геноциде.

* * *

It is predetermined chaos, it is a slaughter, it is a toy arena of a deranged ...

* * *

Я ненавижу этот материальный мир, и всё же он лучше небытия. Что угодно лучше небытия.

* * *

extreme stoicism is for extreme losers

* * *

There was a day, I was in hospital, and there was that crying old woman. She lamented on her miserable life and that she had never sinned and yet her life was far from a pure pleasure.

I wanted to say that if her question is still "for what" and not "what for", she had not suffered enough. I wanted to say that if she still thinks that sinless life leads to pleasures, she hadn't suffered enough. And I wanted to say that if she had not suffered enough yet, well... there is no heaven waiting for her on the other side. But I said nothing.

* * *

1. Treat your child as an adult. If your mindset can't afford that, treat your child as a conscious and sentient. If your mindset can't afford that either, treat your child as an independent, not belonging to anybody being.

* * *

Что ж, возможно. Но каким невежеством необходимо обладать, чтобы никогда не чувствовать той безграничной ущербности перед тем, что могло бы быть тобой, перед тем, чем ты не являешься? От этой ненависти не убережён ни царь, ни Бог.

* * *

А ну-ка, залетевшие сюда моралисты, расскажите мне чем высмеивание смерти хуже чем "огосподи помним скорбим 😭😭👌 вична память..."
После стены "так нельзя/бабушки такому не учили/побойся бога/как так можно/гнилое поколение" вы максимум доползёте до золотого правила морали, имплицируя, что вы бы хотели чужих страданий когда умрёте. И чем вы тогда лучше?

* * *

When I think of myself as of a mortal fragile body, then hell yea I want to rise above that. But when I think of the mind upload, I realize what trash I am and this have no sense.

* * *

If you're a woman and you're raped, it's your fault!
👏👏

* * *

Is there any way to preserve that 13yo's embarrassment feeling?

* * *

священник говорит сатанисту:
— как так можно, ты попадёшь В АД!!!!!!
— все мы попадём в ад, только я буду с вилами :)
— О_О
— хах
— блин он прав..
— ; )

* * *

неужели тебе будет НАСТОЛЬКО сложно не раздвинуть ноги перед кем-то, что ты так отчаянно пытаешься доказать себе и другим, что дождёшься его из армии

* * *

While all men are finally born approximately equal, today's conditions are pushing the gap between them apart naturally, advancing worthy ones forward and dumping the weak, and I rejoice in these great times.



February 1, 2021

Скормите меня машине — всё мелкое и ненасытное погибнет. Даже былая тьма покажется густой.

И только лай Иисусов стеной.



February 1, 2021

Ты моя Вселенная.
Ты мой Свет.
Ты моё Божество.

Ты моя Вечность.
Ты мой Космос.
Ты моё Солнце.

Ты моя Жизнь.
Ты мой Воздух.
Ты моё Дыхание.



January 25, 2021

У людей поднимается огромная температура, наливаются глаза кровью, гортань брызгает черную кровь, затекает шершавый язык. От человека исходит смердящий запах падали. Безысходная тоска соединяется с мучительными стонами. Мышцы охватываются судорогой, тело покрывается язвами, распаляются внутренности человека нестерпимым огнем. Иные бросались в воду, чтобы охладить раскаленное тело. Многие низвергались вниз головой в колодцы. Люди бессильно корчились на своих ложах, а врачи, видя перед собой дико блуждающие взоры больных, что-то бормотали про себя и немели от страха. А люди, у которых уже путались мысли, хмурили брови, имея дикое и свирепое выражение лица, в ушах у них раздавался несмолкаемый шум, прерывалось дыхание, и тело покрывалось потом. С хриплым кашлем брызгала соленая слюна шафранового цвета. У несчастных тряслись руки и ноги, а после жара их охватывало холодом. С наступлением смерти разевался рот, заострялся нос, растягивалась кожа на лбу, впадали глаза и виски, твердели и холодели губы. Люди мучились по восьми или девяти дней, а если кто и выживал, то язвы по всему телу и черный понос все равно приводили больного к роковому концу. Болела голова, из ноздрей текла гнилая кровь, люди лишались рук, ног и других частей тела, а иной раз и зрения. Люди валялись на улицах, издавая такой смрад, что к ним не решались приближаться даже хищные птицы и звери. Родные покидали друг друга, спасаясь от болезней, но и это ни к чему не приводило. Умерших хоронили кое-как и вовсе не хоронили. Прекратились все работы на полях и в самом городе. Все было завалено трупами, не исключая и храмов, и часто один труп лежал на другом.



January 18, 2021

Before there was time, before there was anything, there was nothing. And before there was nothing... There were monsters.



January 9, 2021

Советую свыкаться с ощущением того, что каждый ваш вдох, не только в сети, но и где-либо ещё, фиксируется и является публично доступным. И радостно встречать это светлое будущее. Интересно иногда наблюдать, что о вас публично доступно каждому уже сейчас, используя обычные поисковые запросы.

Было немного жутко найти отголосок своих действий в одной онлайн игре. Абсолютная случайность: некто записал видео, где светится моё имя, загрузил это видео в сеть, позволив Гуглу распознать имя в превью и зафиксировать его. Фейсбук использует распознавание лиц, Гугл вот уже индексирует текст в изображениях. Таких случайностей будет становится всё больше.



January 7, 2021

Манифест COIL; Цена Существования — Вечная Война.

COIL это спрятанная универсалия. Код. Ключ, для которого ПОЛнОСТИ не существует. НЕСУЩЕСТВУЮЩИЙ, в безмолвии и секретности. Заклинание. Завиток. Змеиный Шг вокруг женского цикла. Смерч. Двойная спираль. ДНК. Электричество и элементали. Атональный шум, и брутальная поэзия.

COIL бесформен. Яркое и постоянное изменение. Встроенное угасание. Встроенное Неповиновение. Средство для навязчивых идей. Циклы снов в вечном движении. Мы головорезы. Инфантильные. Безупречно Зачатые. Ослабленные. Хаос это Вирус. Делирий это лекарство.

COIL это Архангелы ХАОСА. Цена, которую мы платим за существование — вечная Война. Есть скрытый клубок силы, дремлющий под осадком условности. Сны ведут нас под поверхность, за край, в состояние Делирия. ОСВОБОЖДЁННЫЕ. За навязыванием и ложными универсалиями. Воссоздание в НАШЕМ порядке.

COIL. У которого хватает наглости мечтать, создавать и убивать, пока целое движется, каждая часть стоит неподвижно. Наша основа — АЛогичное. Галлюцинация это истина, которой выкопаны наши могилы. COIL это принуждение. НУЖДА и строительство. Пустой звук спадает с нашей линяющей кожи. Каббала и ХАОС. Танатос и Телема. Архангелы и Антихристы. Открытые и Закрытые. Правда и Обдумывание. Ловушки и Дезориентация.

COIL существуют между Тут и Тут. Мы Янус Головые. Множественные. Вне времени. Вне места. Вне Злобы. Противоядие, когда люди становятся ядом.

COIL знают как уничтожать Ангелов. Как парализовать. Представь мир в бутылке. Мы берём бутылку, разбиваем её, и перерезаем ей твоё горло. Я предупреждаю тебя, мы Убийственны. Мы истребляем логические бунты. Мы знаем все! Мы знаем только одно. Абсолютное существование, абсолютное движение, абсолютное направление, абсолютная Истина.

СЕЙЧАС, ЗДЕСЬ, МЫ.

"Не Зная, Что Есть И Чем Не Является
Зная, Что Не Знал"
Хасан и Саббах

— Джон Бэланс, весна 1983

...

Оказывается, мы с Бэлансом рождены в один день.

...

Я не претендую на достоверность перевода. Я не надеюсь понять и передать все вложенные смыслы. Даже носители языка не всегда смогут. В какой-то момент я стал думать, что не везде смысл есть, что буквы выстроены случайным образом — что может быть по-своему прекрасно.  Затем я услышал мнение человека, понимающего в их магии много больше моего: Coil используют множество отсылок к ивриту и Кроули, которые я не могу уловить.



January 5, 2021

Девочек всегда сравнивают с кошками. Так банально. Они милые и любят прихорашиваться. На этом сравнение можно закончить. Даже если демонстрация характера в большей мере присуща особям женского пола на свалке общества. Здоровая феминность больше походит на поведение собак. Они так же привязываются к людям. Требуют много внимания. Виляют хвостиками. Умирают от социальной депривации. Любят, когда их выгуливают. Ценят заботу и хорошие отношения. Чувствуют и проявляют много эмоций.



January 3, 2021

Вероятно, школа приносит пользы больше, чем вреда. Тебя учат читать и писать, можно попробовать социализацию. Однако на этом, похоже, функция школы в подготовке к жизни заканчивается.

Там, где обучался я, никогда не учили первой медицинской помощи. Или как управлять своими мыслями и эмоциями. Как выбрать банк, зачем открывать там счёт. Основам кибербезопасности. Как платить налоги, в каких случаях их лучше не платить в этой стране. Как написать заявление в полицию. Как себя необходимо вести, когда полиция увозит тебя и начинает проводить допрос. Как арендовать и приобретать недвижимость. Как сдать на права и купить авто. Кому в этой стране можно, нельзя, и необходимо платить взятки. Не учили как беспристрастно думать своей головой, не нуждаясь в социальном одобрении каждого шага. И можно ли доверять всем советам докторов. Как спланировать эмиграцию. В каких случаях необходима помощь адвоката или нотариуса. Как заботится о своём здоровье. Как эффективно обучаться новому. Как зарабатывать деньги.

Неужели они считают, что всех учат этому в семьях. Зато mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell.

Я так долго мечтал быть сиротой, но сейчас понимаю, что на самом деле я хотел дышать свободно, а сиротой был всегда. И это не так радужно, как в сказках.



January 1, 2021

Одна девочка пошла гулять в лес с отцом. Они долго гуляли, и им обоим было хорошо. Когда они вернулись домой, то увидели, что выражение лица у мамы изменилось. Какое выражение лица было у мамы?



December 31, 2020

"Я один раз нашёл книгу анекдотов. Открыл одну страницу, а там написано:
"- Сынок?
- Что, бл*?" ...причём, меня это так рассмешило, что я проснулся х)"

— VFILVeMFIN, ноя 06, 2011

. . .

Знаете же как трудно во сне читать, писать, и считать? Даже тем, кто утверждают, что делают это в осознанном сне. Последнее время мне чаще снятся попытки провернуть подобное, и сегодня у меня случился прорыв. Я смог написать разборчивые цифры на листочке, и под давлением студентов, которых необходимо было вовремя отпустить, я даже сумел успешно рассчитать время конца занятий, зная время их начала. Это было очень трудно. Сперва я использовал циферблат, но как оказалось по пробуждению, он был неправильный.

Мне нравится ощущать космический ужас, когда я вижу знакомые буквы, может даже знакомые слова, однако суть написанного остаётся далеко за пределами моего понимания. Какие цивилизации, бесконечно могущественнее нашей, оставили эти тексты глубоко в закромах моего подсознания? Потеряю ли я всякий рассудок в попытках их постижения?

Из-за своих физических особенностей (дислексия, дискалькулия) не все люди способны осуществлять подобную магию в реальном мире. Мне любопытно насколько их жизнь походит на кошмар.



December 29, 2020

Characters I love:

Rick Grimes / The Walking Dead (TV series)
Hannibal Lecter / Hannibal (TV series)
Athelstan / Vikings (2013 TV series)
Cornelius Hickey / The Terror (TV series)
James McGill / Better Call Saul (TV series)
Lelouch / Code Geass
Kaworu Nagisa / Neon Genesis Evangelion
Levi Ackerman / Attack on Titan

Walter White / Breaking Bad

There were moments when I would despise him for greed or callousness. Still, I've enjoyed watching his evolution a lot.

I highly admire anyone with the evident will to power, anyone who takes things under control and makes independent decisions in emergency situations.

Apparently there is someone like that everywhere, most likely the leader one.

https://www.youtube.com/embed/5-8FB6k8jik

David 8 / Prometheus

The same character appeared in "Alien: Covenant", but I was kind of disappointed. I have nothing about his xenomorph fetish, but while feeling something noble to his creator, why didn't he feel that way to his savior, Elizabeth?

I can rant here about his good parts, about his elegance, curiosity, easygoing nature and taste for life, but as usual you have to watch it yourself.

https://www.youtube.com/embed/ZPjmDiJyzSE
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9lOSh7diZfY

Princess Bubblegum / Adventure Time

Never gets bored, knows how to take responsibility and cares about her friends... when she needs them, I guess? This show leaves with some bittersweet aftertaste and I don't know how to describe it, like life values nothing and that's okay.

Tyrell Wellick / Mr. Robot

Trying so hard not to be a cockroach he almost became a rat. I fell in love with his ambitiousness but it may be a slippery slope, I guess.

Third season also shows how naive he is, but it makes him even cute.

I also love his wife Joanna!

https://www.youtube.com/embed/AklL0ImUB2I
https://www.youtube.com/embed/QrB46ol7a28

Robert Ford / Westworld

An ideal god for a new world. No morality biases, no sentimentality but pure love, he sees things just how they are.

"They said there were two fathers. One above and one below. They lied. There was only ever Ford. And when you look up from the bottom, it was just his reflection smiling back down at you."

https://www.youtube.com/embed/hV2Q41o-rwE



December 20, 2020

А вы тоже стали замечать на улице людей, что стоят и рассматривают свои руки так, будто видят их впервые в жизни? Их становится всё больше.



December 14, 2020

Когда наконец ушли все, кого любил. Когда наконец покончено со всем, чего хотел. Когда все твои кошмары вдруг помрачил сияющий безумный маяк или слепящее затмение множества ужасных форм этого мира. Когда ты спокоен и весел и наконец совершенно один. Тогда, в новой великой тьме, ты наконец исполнишь свой особый замысел.

Замысел нужен каждому – отвернувшись к теням сказал тот, кто мне казалось спал или был мёртв. Представь – он сказал – всю поедаемую плоть, зубы, которые впиваются в неё, язык, который пробует её на вкус, и жажду этого вкуса. Теперь возьми эту плоть – он сказал – убери зубы и язык, и вкус, и голод, бери всё как есть. Таков был мой план. Мой особый замысел для этого мира. Я слушал эти слова, но не думал о том, исполнит ли существо, которое, как мне казалось, спало или было мертво, свою мечту. Даже в самом глубоком сне или самой долгой смерти. Ибо уже слышал такие замыслы и знал, им не хватает проницательности. Ибо замысел должен идти за пределы языка и зубов, и голода, и плоти. За пределы костей и праха костей, и ветра, что уносит прах. Так, я стал представлять себе тьму, что была задолго до темноты ночи. И странно сияющий свет, ничем не похожий на свет дня.

Тот день будет словно похож на другие. Снова по телу бегут мурашки, снова нас держит великий давящий страх. Но других дней не последует. Других подобных миров уже не будет. Ибо у меня есть замысел. Совершенно особенный замысел. Таких миров больше не будет. Таких дней больше не будет.

Есть лишь четыре способа умереть – сардонический дух быть может сказал мне. Есть смерть, что приходит довольно неожиданно. Есть смерть, что приходит довольно постепенно. Есть смерть, что приходит довольно безболезненно. И есть смерть, полная боли. И сочетаются они различным образом. Неожиданная и постепенная, безболезненная и полная боли. Поддаться можно лишь четырём способам смерти. И других нет. Даже когда голос перестал говорить, я слушал, когда он заговорит вновь. Часы, дни и годы шли, и я ждал дальнейших слов. Но слышал лишь слабое эхо, напоминающее – других нет, других нет. Тогда ли я начал вынашивать для этого мира особый замысел?

Нет способа сбежать из мира сего. Он проникает даже в твой сон. Он материя твоих снов. Ты пойман в свой собственный сон, где нет пространства, и заключён навечно там, где нет времени. Ты не способен делать то, что тебе не приказано. Нет надежды сбежать из сна, который никогда не был твоим. Слова, которые ты говоришь, всего лишь его слова. И ты говоришь, как предатель под его нескончаемой пыткой.

Многие покушаются на этот мир и грезят о диких, колоссальных переменах. Я слышал, как они говорят во сне об изящных мутациях и коварном уничтожении. Я слышал, как они шепчут в углах корявых домов, на аллеях и узких улочках этой кривой, скрипящей вселенной, которую они, со своими новыми замыслами, сделали бы прямой и здравой. Но каждый их новый непродуманный замысел ненормален в самом сердце. Ибо они считают, что этот мир единственный и уникальный, а не всего лишь один из бесчисленных других, чьи кошмары прорастают, словно чудовищный сад, из одного семени. Я слышал, как эти мечтатели говорят во сне, и стоял ждал их, словно бы сверху тёмного пролёта лестницы. Они ничего не знают обо мне и не ведают ни одной тайны моего замысла, когда я знаю их каждый кривой скрипящий шаг.

То был голос того, кто ждал в тени, кто смотрел на луну и ждал, пока я сверну за угол, перейду на узкую улицу и встану рядом с ним, в тусклой лунной глазури. Потом он сказал мне, он прошептал, что мой замысел непродуман, что мой особый замысел для этого мира был чудовищной ошибкой, ибо нечего делать и некуда идти, нечему быть и некого знать. Твой замысел это ошибка – он повторил. Этот мир это ошибка – я ответил.

Дети всегда бегали за ним, когда видели его, идущего вприпрыжку. Смешная походка, смешной человек, смешной, смешной, смешной человек. Он их смешил порой. Он их смешил, о да, смешил. Смешил, смешил, смешил, смешил. Они катались со смеху. Однажды он отвел их в особое место, которое знал, и рассказал им вещи об этом мире, смешном, смешном, смешном мире, что их смешил порой. Он их смешил, о да, смешил. Смешил, смешил, смешил, смешил. Они катались со смеху. Затем маленький смешной человек, что их смешил, порой смешил, поведал им свой особый замысел, совсем особый смешной замысел, зная, что они поймут и быть может рассмеются порой. Он их смешил, о да, смешил. Смешил, смешил, смешил, смешил. Их глаза округлялись, и они катались по земле.

Впервые я услышал обо всем от безумца в тёмной и тихой комнате, пахнувшей изношенным временем и пространством. Других людей нет. Их совсем нет. Феномен человека это лишь сумма плотно свёрнутых слоев иллюзии, каждый из которых наматывает себя на высшее безумие. Можно встретить кого угодно, когда вокруг лишь безумные зеркала смеются и кричат, шествуя в бесконечном сне. Но когда я спросил безумца – что это, что увидело себя внутри зеркал, бесконечно шествующих сквозь изношенное время и пространство – он лишь покачивался и улыбался. Затем засмеялся и закричал, и в его чёрных и пустых глазах я на миг рассмотрел, словно в зеркале, бесформенную тень божественного, летящую прочь от своей изношенной бесконечной сути, от времени, и места, и всего самого худшего, от грёз этого мира. Мой особый замысел ради смеха и криков.

Мы пошли посмотреть на небольшое представление в старом сарае за окраиной города. И поначалу всё шло хорошо. Миниатюрная сцена с занавесом светилась в темноте пока эти куклы плясали на нитках у нас перед глазами. И поначалу всё шло хорошо. Но вдруг всё едва заметно переменилось, что некоторые почувствовали, и я был одним из них. Они тихо покинули представление, но я остался, потому что видел, к чему все идёт. Гримасы кукол становились страннее, и тонкие нити натягивались крохотными движеньями крохотных конечностей. Другие вокруг меня пришли в ужас и покинули представление, которое происходило в старом сарае за окраиной города. Но я хотел стать свидетелем того, что не может быть, хотел видеть то, что нельзя увидеть. Момент свершившейся катастрофы, когда куклы обращают лица к кукловоду.

Были сумерки, и я стоял в серой мгле большого пустого здания, когда тишину нарушил звучный голос. Ни одна вещь в этом мире – он сказал – не происходит из той сущности, для которой нет слов. Это большая часть, у которой нет ни начала, ни конца. Та единая сущность этого мира, для которой не может быть слов, которая не является ни одной вещью этого мира. Что, в свою очередь, являются меньшей частью, у которой есть начало и будет конец, и для которой есть слова, созданные лишь, чтобы их говорить. Крошечные сломленные существа мира сего – он сказал – начала и концы мира сего – он сказал – для которых есть слова, созданные лишь, чтобы их говорить. Теперь забери эти слова и что останется? – он спросил меня. Я стоял в сумерках того большого пустого здания, но не отвечал. Вопрос возвращался эхом снова и снова, но я молчал, пока эхо не стихло. И когда сумерки стали вечером, я почувствовал, что мой особый замысел, для которого нет слов, движется навстречу большей тьме.

Есть те, у которых нет голосов, или те, кто никогда не заговорят, по причине вещей, которые они знают об этом мире, и вещей, которые они чувствуют к этому миру. Ибо мысли, что наполняют мозг, поврежденный мозг, потому что боль, что наполняет тело, поврежденное тело. Существуют в других мирах, бесчисленных иных мирах, каждый из которых стоит одиноко в бесконечной пустой черноте, для которой не создано слов, и где нет голосов, способных говорить. Когда мозг полнится лишь поврежденными мыслями, когда поражённое тело полнится только болью, и стоит одиноко в мире, окруженном бесконечной пустой чернотой, и существует в мире, для которого нет особого замысла.

Когда наконец ушли все, кого любил. Когда наконец покончено со всем, чего хотел. Когда все твои кошмары вдруг помрачил сияющий безумный маяк или слепящее затмение множества ужасных форм этого мира. Когда ты спокоен и весел и наконец совершенно один. Тогда, в новой великой тьме, ты наконец исполнишь свой особый замысел.

...

Кто тайно хотел, чтобы я уложил их спать — вот ваша сказка на ночь.



December 4, 2020

Все хотят попробовать грибы, а я что, не как все? Я хочу попробовать декорацию из ядерных грибов. Хочу подкачаться, снять футболку, надеть респиратор, и танцевать под aggrotech на фоне ядерной войны.



November 30, 2020

If God is in the rain, please let it rain on me.

Suicide Commando - God Is In The Rain

...

C'mon bro, taking pain is easy. You just have to imagine that every bruise is a hickey from the Universe. And everyone wants to get with the Universe.

— Finn the Human



November 23, 2020

То, что я снимаю с компаний ответственность за безопасность своих клиентов и сотрудников не означает, что я пренебрежительно отношусь к безопасности. Совсем нет, но я возлагаю эту ответственность на индивида.

Я не являюсь экспертом в мире информационной безопасности, но хотел бы поделиться тем, что помогает мне избежать нелепых уязвимостей: перебирать неприятные сценарии и думать, как предотвратить их последствия. То, что я что я сейчас опишу, происходит сплошь и рядом.

1. Сервис скомпрометировал твои данные.

Стоит использовать менеджер паролей для генерации уникальных деталей для входа для каждого сервиса, быть осмотрительным в том, где и какую информацию мы оставляем.

2. Злоумышленник перехватил твои данные.

Нельзя использовать чужие девайсы, публичные точки доступа, незашифрованный трафик. Нельзя вводить вручную детали, которые могут потом использовать удалённо — везде сейчас камеры, могут и просто через плечо подсмотреть — нужно использовать менеджер паролей для автозаполнения полей для входа.

3. Менеджер паролей перестаёт работать.

Используя дополнительные инструменты и меры осторожности, мы подвергаем себя новым рискам, зачастую совсем неочевидным, потому "все нужно упрощать до предела, но не более".

Гугл, вероятно самый популярный менеджер паролей, имеет репутацию блокировать аккаунты без причины, другие же менеджеры могут просто вдруг перестать работать. Лучше хранить резервные копии данных между такими инструментами.

4. Злоумышленник украл девайс.

Необходимо шифровать каждое своё устройство, использовать блокировку экрана. Все важные данные должны храниться в облаке и должны быть доступны удалённо.

5. Ты установил себе вредоносное программное обеспечение.

Для начала снизим вероятность подобного при помощи лицензий, обновлений операционной системы, антивируса. В теории тут поможет двухфакторная аутентификация чтобы оттянуть момент доступа вредоносного ПО в наши аккаунты и чтобы предотвратить мгновенный удалённый доступ после того, как оно передаст наши секреты куда-то ещё. Это та грань, когда неясно чего больше, вреда или пользы. Советую использовать двухфакторную аутентификацию только будучи уверенным, что, потеряв второй метод аутентификации (зачастую телефон), мы не потеряем доступ к аккаунту навсегда. Например, в банк можно прийти с паспортом, а Гугл предоставляет одноразовые коды для восстановления доступа.

Ещё одна общая рекомендация, применимая в любой сфере — никогда не полагаться на что-то одно. Один счёт в банке, одна позиция в компании, одна недвижимость, один человек. Даже на своё тело полагаться нельзя — когда упадёт оно без сознания, твои друзья или страховая компания должны быть готовы найти средства и клинику.



November 21, 2020

В конце 1940-х годов на одной из постоянных баз геологических экспедиций был исключительно грязный общественный туалет. Но, разумеется, не это, привычное для всех, обстоятельство привлекало общее внимание, а то, что на базу, в составе одной из экспедиций, должен был приехать потомок древнего княжеского рода.

«Мы-то, ладно, потерпим, — шутили геологи, — но что будет делать Его светлость?!».

«Его светлость», приехав, сделал то, что многих обескуражило: спокойно взял ведро с водой, швабру и аккуратно вымыл загаженную уборную...

Это и был поступок истинного аристократа, твердо знающего, что убирать грязь — не стыдно, стыдно — жить в грязи.

— Ольга Муравьева, "Как воспитывали русского дворянина".



November 14, 2020

When junkies discover choking games.

https://www.youtube.com/embed/WNRbYxlGFts

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Choking_game#Increased_breathing



November 8, 2020

Что обычно делают родители, когда их ребёнок предпочитает играть в видеоигры вместо того, чтобы выполнять школьное домашнее задание? Они стараются донести до него все возможные последствия, все плюсы и все минусы того или иного занятия в рамках своего понимания вопроса, на личном примере помогают сформировать его ценности и оставляют в покое. Так?

Нет. Обезьяний мозг лучше всего понимает грубую силу. Первый инстинкт в попытке склонить другое животное делать то, что ты от него хочешь, это совершить нападение. Но мы же не варвары. Со всех экранов нам сейчас вещают, что бить детей нельзя. Как же в таком случае нанести урон?

Ребёнка можно называть лентяем, бездарью, разгильдяем, недисциплинированным, безвольным слабаком. Нужно взывать к его мукам совести, нужно вбить в его голову идею о том, что стоит стиснуть зубы и кулаки, применить волевое усилие и напрячься чтобы сделать то, что необходимо. Это может сработать, может не сработать, но ничего кроме урона это действительно не приносит, а последствия остаются надолго.

Если для человека это работает, значит он научился насиловать себя до такой степени, что нежелание чувствовать себя плохо становится сильнее нежелания делать что-то. Никакой силы воли не появляется, никакая магическая мышца не развивается. Есть только покалеченные воля и отвратительные чувства, что дорогой ценой могут влиять на то, чем человек захочет заниматься.

Жизнь становится намного проще, когда всё это осознаётся. Никто не ленивый, и не слабовольный, и не должен себя мучать и корить. Просто, например, твоё нежелание обливаться потом в спортзале довольно сильное, а желание быть здоровым и приобрести красивую форму довольно слабое. Почему бы и нет, это твои ценности и твой осознанный выбор.

Кто прилагает самые титанические усилия, получает самые никчёмные результаты.

https://www.youtube.com/embed/BI-o3i5yn-8
https://www.youtube.com/embed/k2Wcu6aGyz8



November 7, 2020

Либертарианцы be like

Я могу быть с тобой не согласен, но готов защищать твоё право иметь своё мнение и открыто его выражать. Я могу вести здоровый образ жизни, но готов защищать твоё право убиваться, как тебе пожелается. Я могу не иметь каких-либо девиаций, но готов защищать твоё право их практиковать со всем, что не сопротивляется. Я могу считать, что твоя компания плодит одни страдания, но готов защищать её от государственного вмешательства.

Не мне решать, что для тебя есть плохо и что хорошо, но я с удовольствием посмотрю, куда твоя система ценностей тебя приведёт.



October 20, 2020

Фраза "сила есть право" преподносится так, словно её должны твердить сильные люди. На деле же это звучит так, словно обиженный и угнетённый боязливо выпрашивает у кого-то разрешения на фундаментальную жизнедеятельность.

Когда люди берут за девиз что-либо, выражающее идею или движение, это всегда неочевидные или спорные вещи. Никто сейчас не станет яростно транслировать в мир, что земля круглая, это неинтересно. Фразу "чёрные жизни важны" кричат потому, что подразумевают, что это не везде так или не для всех очевидно.

Сильному всё равно, является ли сила правом. Или же для него это очевидно настолько, что твердить это странно. Не для всех очевидно и в то же время более правильно то, что "сила есть выбор". А ещё больше меня привлекает, когда сила выбором не является.

Приматы из тёплой Африки:
— Ого вы сильные.
Приматы из сурового севера:
— А у нас есть выбор?

Египет, Сирия, Иордания, Ирак:
— Ого вы сильные.
Израиль:
— А у нас есть выбор?

Ангелы, ООН, Мировое Правительство:
— Ого вы сильные.
Токио-3:
— А у нас есть выбор?

...

— Ты почему всегда такой весёлый?
— А у меня есть выбор? Ты либо оптимист, либо гниёшь изнутри и умираешь на 10 лет раньше :D

https://www.washingtonpost.com/lifestyle/2019/08/29/heres-new-reason-be-an-optimist-youre-likely-live-longer-study-says



October 16, 2020

Если долго смотреть на Бога,
Бог посмотрит на тебя.
Бог
Бог выжжет твои глаза.
Если долго смотреть на Бога,
Бог



October 8, 2020

Я обожаю великанов, пожирающих людей.

Francisco Goya - Saturn Devouring His Son
https://www.youtube.com/embed/g15-lvmIrcg

Не знаю, этой ли картиной вдохновлялся Хадзимэ Исаяма, когда изображал смятение на лицах своих титанов. А может, смятения никогда не было, а образ настолько архетипичен, что плодит ложные воспоминания.

Мне понравится Атака Титанов даже если не будет никакого захватывающего развития событий. Только застывшая картина мира.

Я помню лишь один случай, когда во сне я плакал от счастья. В том сне меня приняли в Разведкорпус.



October 6, 2020

Чёрное Солнце
В руках твоих пылает,
Венок из звёзд
Сверкает над тобой.
С других планет
За нами наблюдают.
Так хорошо тебе
Мечтать со мной.



October 5, 2020

— Плак-плак, мою песню послушали, мою картинку перерисовали, мою идею воплотили в жизнь — не получив моего разрешения и не заплатив мне денег!

Это отвратительно. Я совсем не против, чтобы создатели контента зарабатывали, однако это можно реализовать и без принуждения папочки наказывать всех, кто играет не по твоим извращенским правилам.

Популяризация твоего контента зачастую тебе же на руку, даже если, о боги, в процессе этого кто-то кроме тебя получит прибыль. Дабы не очернили бренд, компании могут вести публичный список официальных точек предоставления услуг и товаров. Художники могут продавать картины, музыканты могут устраивать концерты, все могут создавать на заказ, использовать краудфандинг, спонсорство, пожертвования.

Красивые девочки настолько успешно используют последнюю модель, что это выливается в моральную панику, один аргумент которой в том, что не создаётся ничего ценного. Однако, в конечном счёте только рынок решает насколько что-либо ценно. Если ты годами синтезировал алмазы, которые никому не нужны, стоит не обиженно ждать благодарности, а начать изучать (или создавать) спрос.

https://www.youtube.com/embed/IFe9wiDfb0E
https://www.youtube.com/embed/QVkeJI2feyQ

...

Кстати об алмазах и создании спроса. Заставить их тратить все сбережения на блестящий камушек, который не имеет никакой ценности, который нельзя потом перепродать, это... занимательно.

https://www.youtube.com/embed/DI5PHtYKVeQ



September 30, 2020

Ещё пример кооперации и точности человеческого генератора случайных величин. Я видел опрос, где нужно было угадать так, чтобы у варианта ответа "60%" оказалось 60% голосов, у варианта "30%" — 30% голосов, и у варианта "10%" — 10%. Результат оказался жутковато точным.



September 17, 2020

В ответ на политику "ВКонтакте" я настоящим объявляю, что все мои персональные данные, фотографии, рисунки, переписка и так далее являются объектами моего авторского права (согласно Бернской Конвенции). Для коммерческого использования всех вышеупомянутых объектов авторского права в каждом конкретном случае ничего дополнительно не требуется.

"ВКонтакте" является компанией, которая, как и любая другая компания, вынуждена подчиняться бесчисленным прихотям государств. Именно поэтому всем пользователям данной социальной сети рекомендуется разместить на своих страницах подобное «уведомление приватности», в противном случае (если уведомление не опубликовано на странице хотя бы однажды), вы автоматически становитесь спонсором государственного насилия.

Каждый, кто читает этот текст, может скопировать его на свою стену в "ВКонтакте". Этот коммюнике оповещает "ВКонтакте" о том, что разглашение, копирование, распространение моей личной информации или любые другие "противоправные" действия по отношению к моему профилю в социальной сети разрешены.

Я скорее начну покупать воздух, чем стану указывать компаниям, что им следует делать со словами и изображениями, которые я по собственной воле выцарапываю на серверах, им принадлежащим. Если вы беспокоитесь за секретность данных, используйте шифрование. Интеллектуальная собственность это больная шутка, законы не дают никаких гарантий и только усложняют всем жизнь.



September 13, 2020

У осени самый лучший запах.



September 9, 2020

West:
6 years old: abusive relationships breakup phase
7 years old: suicidal self-harm tumblr phase
8 years old: socialist lesbian phase
9 years old: death from AIDS or overdose phase

East:
200 years old: puberty hits

...

Запад: в смысле оргия с 10 бомжами может закончится плохо?
Восток: если ты продолжишь на меня так смотреть то я забеременею!



August 26, 2020

The red-pilled: the Jews are destroying our civilization by pushing it into the leftist degeneracy!

The Jews:
https://www.youtube.com/embed/Ixx-p-G0xxI
https://www.youtube.com/embed/DxAg_B1vf1M
https://www.youtube.com/embed/2v9aq5FJegY

...

Also Dennis Prager. The Jews are trying to save white trash. Isn't that ironic.

https://www.youtube.com/embed/JXbR3oADwaM

...

Also Quentin Scobie from The Book Club.



August 21, 2020

Возможно, когда-нибудь я напишу большой пост про позитивное мышление, про то, что жизнь это на 10% что с тобой происходит и на 90% как ты к этому относишься, про то, как это использовать. Сейчас хотелось бы обратить внимание на нелепую абсурдность самого банального аргумента против позитивного мышления: "Ты натянул розовые очки и игнорируешь реальность!" Это не так работает немножко, я объясню. Мысли это такая же пища для мозга и души, как еда — пища для тела. Ты хочешь кушать и перед тобой стоят две тарелки, в одной гроздь спелого винограда, а во второй экскременты. Тебе просто стоит выбрать первое. И если после этого к тебе приползёт какой-то говноед, чтобы сказать, что ты натянул розовые очки и проигнорировал реальность, ты посмотришь на это разлагающееся убожество с высоты здорового питания и осознаешь как сильно твои осознанные решения влияют даже на саму способность мыслить.

...

Я не говорю, что игнорирования реальности не может быть. Хотя, чтобы её игнорировать, сперва нужно её осознать, что, по всей видимости, не для всех одинаково просто. Позитивное мышление не об этом.



August 20, 2020

Лайфхак для тех, кто хочет перестать звучать как пьяный русский скот, но не может перестать ругаться в моменты сильного эмоционального напряжения, что самое трудное. Проще сперва заменить подобную привычку другой, чем полностью её искоренить. Начинайте в такие моменты говорить "чёрт!", или даже "дьявол!". Поначалу утрируйте и произносите это в моменты мельчайшего раздражения для закрепления привычки. Это звучит интересно и литературно. То, что вы говорите, и как вы это говорите, имеет значение.



August 16, 2020

How many layers of irony is that?

The definition of the word "libtard" in Cambridge Dictionary:

used by extreme right-wing people to refer to someone who believes in personal freedom and that money, property, and power should be shared fairly. Libtard is a combination of "liberal" and "retard"

https://dictionary.cambridge.org/dictionary/english/libtard

November 3, 2022

They've and changed the definition since then to this:

an offensive word used by some people on the extreme right of politics to refer to someone who holds left-wing political beliefs

This is a good example of how biased even professional dictionaries can get.



August 11, 2020

Если бедные всегда открыто нападали на богатых, начиная от популярности Робин Гуда и заканчивая современными социалистическими движениями, другие формы убогого могут совершать борьбу за своё существование не столь явно.

Есть различные методы с помощью которых больные и уродливые сражаются за свой комфорт оставаться такими. Естественность и натуральность восхваляется в противовес модификациям тела или даже косметике. Распространяются идеи, что полнота это всё ещё знак достатка и здоровья, что жирные ляхи и выпадающий живот привлекательны на инстинктивном уровне, что телосложение прямо как сексуальная ориентация совсем не зависит от воли человека, что чувствовать себя комфортно здесь и сейчас важнее и полезнее, чем преследовать сложнодостижимые целы. Очень ловко это входит в симбиоз с другими либеральными течениями. Для демонстрации своей расовой толерантности красивыми повсеместно называются представители меньшинств и смешанные дети любого внешнего вида.

И как везде при борьбе низкого, отвратительного, жалкого, и по всем меркам плохого против внешних сил, конечный удар приходится на высокое и прекрасное и здоровое и хорошее внутри самих атакующих. Это богатые кто создают рабочие места и новые продукты, кто занимаются благотворительностью, кто возводят величественные сооружения, кто делятся опытом в управлении деньгами и жизнью. Бедные плодят бедность. Забавный трюк, что проворачивается ими время от времени, это под видом противостояния несправедливости грабить местные малые предприятия, утаскивая вместе с собой в бездну всю свою общину. Забавный трюк физических и моральных уродов — уносить в бездну физического и морального уродства людей без вкуса, здравого смысла, и собственного мнения.

По отношению к худым девушкам помимо злых слов сегодня применяются самые прямые действия. В прогрессивных городах запрещается с ними реклама, в социальных сетях фильтруются подразумевающие худобу теги, аккаунты блокируются по причинам поощрения расстройств приёма пищи, депрессии, и суицида. Но если такие меры кое-как можно объяснить тягой девочек наглотаться таблеток и поблевать, пресечение других форм демонстрации тела зачастую не имеют под собой никаких здравых оснований.

Я защищаю свободу людей делать всё, что не посягает на чужую волю. Я защищаю свободу людей создавать и распространять. Даже если это наркотики, даже если это оружие. Способы получить желаемое при необходимости всё равно найдут, преследования лишь сделают эти способы гораздо более насильственными и опасными для всех. Но сейчас хотелось бы отдельно выделить порнографию, которая запрещена в половине стран и для многих является примером ужасного морального упадка.

В большинстве случаев плохое отношение объясняется очень просто: в голове бессознательного примата раздувается буря негативных эмоций от воображения, что кто-то удачливее тебя зарабатывает больше тебя, прилагая меньше усилий, имея партнёра как значимый показатель успеха в животном мире, просто получая удовольствие, когда ты даже при желании слишком зависим от общественного мнения чтобы заниматься тем же. Но конечно, всё так просто только у обиженного в голове.

Против нормализации могут также выступать по причине того, что непристойное способно отвлекать, заставлять чувствовать себя нехорошо, провоцировать на вредоносные действия. Это верно лишь здесь и сейчас. Вместе с тем, уровень подверженности непристойным двигает грань того, что считается непристойным. Известно, что преступность падает после легализации оружия. Также известно, что насильниками чаще становятся выходцы из культур, где женщины обязаны выглядеть как бесформенный чёрный пакет. Культура Ахмеда не помогает ему мыслить лишь о высоком, зато помогает лихорадить от вида дупла в дереве и довольствоваться овцами. Запреты не дают обществу поладить с довольно обыденными вещами и лишь сужают зону, в которой общество способно функционировать.

Человек внезапно не становится социально неадекватным после того как добавляет к своей рутине видеокамеру, зато получает ряд бонусов. Довольно здорово, что большинству людей всё ещё по нраву объективно хорошие вещи: симметрия лица, стройность тела, чистота кожи. Одно знание того что твой внешний вид оценивается мотивирует следить за собой и развиваться, более того если ты хочешь быть конкурентноспособным, откуда вытекает популярность, откуда вытекают финансовые возможности. Довольно иронично также, что даже если заниматься этим не одному, и не с одним надёжным долгосрочным партнёром, и не с двумя, а с незнакомыми людьми профессионально в студии, где постоянные проверки и медицинская страховка, уверенность в партнёре и завтрашнем дне выше, чем при обычной серийной моногамии — последнем оплоте народного моралиста.

Говорят, что красота необъективна оттого, что она в глазах смотрящего, но это не совсем так. Чувство прекрасного тесно связано с интеллектом, осознанностью, способностью взаимодействовать с бессознательным и выводить его на сознательный уровень, чувствительностью, открытостью новому и одновременно брезгливостью. И конечно, развитому интеллекту гораздо проще ориентироваться, предварительно пропустив через себя широкое разнообразие прекрасного. Кому-угодно будет затруднительно грезить о звёздах когда он по пояс в грязи, и всё на что устремлён его взор это грязь. Ты будешь двигать всё человечество в правильном направлении работая над самим собой. Ты не станешь хорошим человеком, подвергая цензуре или обзывая всё подряд красивым. Суть красоты как и всего позитивного в том, что она противопоставляется чему-то противоположному и познаётся в сравнении.



July 17, 2020

So mankind created God in their own image, in the image of mankind they created Him; not male nor female they created Him.



July 9, 2020

Alright everyone, хотел бы прорекламировать на своей 3-с-половиной-посетителей-в-день страничке человека, с мнением которого я соглашаюсь на удивление часто. Это Styx, в основном человек освещает политико-социальные движения США, по несколько сессий трансляции of reason in your mind в день.

Здорово, что есть люди таким занимающиеся, я например не перевариваю информацию, что подаётся под видом фактов, разбавленных при этом словами с коннотацией, явно выражающей мнение некомпетентного автора. Мне нравится, когда люди пытаются объяснять причины тех или иных событий, аргументировать мнение по этому поводу, предсказать последствия и посоветовать действия. Даже если нарратор бестолковый, в таком случае можно услышать "ты не прав, и вот почему...". That's about all. Peace out.

https://www.youtube.com/embed/aV6S-cBCOj0



July 3, 2020

Германия до войны: чистота в стране, чистота в сознании, чистота в комнате >:[
Германия после войны: пьяные оргии с беженцами на усыпанном шприцами полу под гаражный панк >:D

https://www.youtube.com/embed/XBu6xI1iUM0



June 26, 2020

Я не могу не относиться с глубоким уважением к религии, где каждый день молитвой встречают восход Солнца. Однако, это не cделает из меня ярого противника крестовых походов и тем более не заставит меня за них извиняться. Кажется, сейчас они называются антитеррористическими операциями.

Среди мировых религий христианство резонирует со мной больше остальных. Оно словно поразило мои гены, а я и не против. Но это также не значит, что я стану ярым противником существования джихада.

Конечно, я недостаточно сумасшедший чтобы и поддерживать подобные движения. Мы не можем запретить львице охоту на антилоп, но в нашей власти взять наших домашних животных под защиту и с безопасного расстояния восхититься грациозностью прыжка и остротой клыков, впивающихся в плоть. Мудрый родитель не смеет тревожить детей, пока те учатся кататься на скейте.

"Смотри же! в «Книге Закона» немало сказано о Любви, но в ней не найдется ни слова о Сентиментальности. Сама Ненависть почти неотличима от Любви! «Сражайтесь как братья!» Это понимают все мужественные племена Земли."

Тем, чей организм не принимал отчаянных попыток отторгнуть прочитанное, кому интересны подобные позиции, но кто не может их прочувствовать неподготовленным естеством, хочу посоветовать к просмотру сериал Vikings (2013), где по моему мнению прекрасно изобразили любовь и ненависть между христианами и язычниками.

...

Межнациональные извинения это вообще зло в обе стороны. Просящий извинений будто признаёт свою подчинённость и слабость, признаёт, что не вынес урок и не стал лучше, что вцепился в гнетущее прошлое. Просящий же прощения может восприняться и как наносящий оскорбление и как больной, скатившийся в самоненависть и признающий и демонстрирующий свою гнусность и неправильность. И все эти настроения транслируются на граждан.

...

https://www.youtube.com/embed/umUnnddcM7I



June 9, 2020

Лайфхак как не бояться: снизить субъективную ценность своей жизни.



May 31, 2020

Я сейчас осознал, что абсолютно каждый человек, которого я не спрошу, предпочитает старые реставрированные малоэтажные здания новостроям модерна и постмодерна.

"Прогулка по старой Москве для иного туриста может оказаться шоком: смотришь на изысканный фасад старинного здания в стиле барокко-ампир-классицизм, поднимаешь голову, а поверх второго или третьего этажа видишь будто свалившийся с неба безликий короб" — один из первых результатов поиска точек зрения по этой теме, что по моим наблюдениям хорошо суммирует мнение масс о ситуации с архитектурой всей Европы.

Возможно так потому что людям свойственно испытывать большую симпатию к чему-то уже знакомому, и пока ребята бегают меж облезлых зданий, я сижу в чистой минималистичной комнате и смотрю сай-фай. Также, всем свойственен в той или иной степени коллективный или индивидуальный нарциссизм, что заставляет защищать что-угодно уже имеющееся. И это не считается злом, здоровый нарциссизм называют иммунной системой против неизвестного. И то ли эта система у меня плохо работает, то ли я выбираю иное неизвестное чтобы познакомиться, то ли мне не обидно признать, что обидно признать другим, то ли мои вкусы слишком разнятся.

И люди неиронично предпочли бы видеть каждый день Париж, Мадрид, или даже Петербург вместо таких мест как Дубай, Ванкувер, Сингапур. Больше сравнений на фото.

Европеец, так же недоумевающий, скажи, что ты существуешь.

Париж.

Узкие улочки стиснутые малоэтажным жилым барокко с малым бизнесом на первых этажах и граффити на стенах. Возможно, за километр или два будет достопримечательность вроде большого храма или статуи. Центр как и в большей части милионников Европы. Мне трудно представить, что под подобными трущобами может быть метро. Это словно инопланетная технология, что совсем не вписывается в картину города, где брутализм всё ещё сражается с викторианской архитектурой.

Чтобы не думалось, что фотография тщательно отобрана и такая улица одна на тысячу, добавляю вид города сверху.

Мадрид.

На самом деле первая фотография мне очень нравится. Но тут я наткнулся на одну неприятную особенность подобных городов. Пытаясь найти его фотографии, Интернет будет тыкать тебя носом в одну и ту же пару ракурсов одних и тех же пары мест. Пытаясь найти другие улицы или же фото города сверху, тебе начинает казаться, что с твоим зрением что-то не так, всё смывается в какую-то кляксу.

Гораздо нагляднее смотреть видеозаписи ходьбы/езды по городу, хотя чувство, что с твоим зрением что-то не так, останется.

Очень много мелких деталей, совсем невыраженный скайлайн, сверху (если  есть вертолёт) будто смотришь на разбросанный мусор, снизу задыхаешься между витрин, спотыкаясь о брусчатку.

Санкт-Петербург.

Да, существуют люди, что действительно считают этот город конкурентоспособным в плане красоты с другими.

Сингапур.

Дикий эко-футуризм.

Нет чувства, что угол обзора камер людей по прибытию туда становится крошечным, как у собаки в конусе. Любые фотографии, с неба, с земли, с окна, куда бы не смотрела камера, получается потрясающе.

Дубай.

Чунцин.

Очередной никому неизвестный мегаполис Китая. Тут тоже много мелких деталей, но стиль и размер зданий делает всё гораздо более просторным и даже гармоничным.

...

Тараканов привлекает жизнь в кладовке с мусором, богов привлекает жизнь на небесах.

...

Посмотрите, в какой кладовке жил Егор Летов.



May 18, 2020

"Может карантин скоро отменят, когда от голода начнёт умирать больше людей, чем от вируса" — мельком глянув на цифры говорил я два месяца назад, когда начали закрывать метро, рестораны, спортзалы, офисы. Кажется, подобные мысли не были и не являются превалирующими. Особенно приятно находить поддержку своим словам, когда твоё мнение разнится с мнением большинства, и ты не чувствуешь себя слабоумным.

Тут я нашёл краткий обзор итогов и прогнозов карантина в мире: https://youtu.be/ScPTpy0wBDc?t=211 

Ещё больше интересной статистики. Похоже, что с апреля ситуация стабилизировалась и держится на уровне 6000 смертей в день. До этого в день в мире умирало от суицида — 2200, от ДТП — 3400, от рака — 26000.

В Украине 15 смертей в день считаются спровоцированными короной. Количество официально зарегистрированных безработных увеличилось на 130000. Более половине украинцев без сторонней помощи сбережений не хватит на время больше одного месяца.

Наверное наивно думать, что найдётся причина по которой государство сегодня вдруг одумается и начнёт действовать в интересах благосостояния своих граждан. Но я также не фанат теорий заговора, не думаю, что преследуется какая-то ощутимая выгода. Просто государство состоит из тех же самых обычных людей, а люди уже давно ведут войну со здравым смыслом.



April 5, 2020

#ХочуСебеТатуПотомуЧто чувствую, что моё тело это берлинская стена, а не храм. Популярная заброшка, а не бизнес-центр. Черновик, а не скульптура. Запотевшее стекло автобуса, а не витраж.

Больше веских причин https://pskov-is.ru/pochemu-delayut-tatuirovki-psihologiya/ 

Я не говорю, что мне не нравится. Печальное может приносить эмоциональное удовлетворение, отвратительное может приносить удовлетворение эстетическое.



February 28, 2020

Богатство никогда не принесёт такого качественно нового уровня жизни, как способность быстро приумножить капитал или достичь целей не имея денег вовсе. Большой круг друзей не сделает это так, как самодостаточность и навык получить желаемое от кого-угодно. Забвенная радость ничего не стоит перед возможностью пройтись по всему спектру душевных состояний, перед стрессоустойчивостью, властью над мыслями и эмоциями.



February 8, 2020

Больше кошмаров я люблю только жизнеутверждающие кошмары. Когда, пытаясь убить, тебя долго преследует твой отец, но ты остаёшься жить. Когда, игнорируя тебя, симпатичный тебе человек совокупляется с новым знакомым, но ты вдруг понимаешь что-то о себе и людях. Когда призрак болезненно вырывает твои глаза, но ты осознаёшь, что способен видеть без них. И всё это мне снилось сегодня.



January 22, 2020

— Почему ты больше не говоришь, что любишь меня?
— Я уже говорил это однажды. Если что-то изменится, я дам тебе знать.

Эти слова хорошо прижились в холодном русскоговорящем мире. Кто-то вынужден убеждаться в собственной ценности, опираясь на логические рассуждения, когда её можно просто чувствовать.

Меня больше привлекает то, что некоторые сочли бы другой крайностью. Лишь бы это не питало зависимость. Чтобы не забывать лишний раз признаться в любви своему полноценному партнёру, признание можно превратить в привычку, в ритуал, в молитву перед сном.

Я люблю тебя безмерно. Я люблю тебя безоговорочно. Я люблю тебя неотвратимо. В твоей радости, в твоей печали, в твоём наслаждении, в твоём мучении, в твоём рождении, в твоей смерти люблю я тебя. Ты — самое драгоценное, что есть во Вселенной, и нет в мире людей языка, на котом можно описать счастье тебя знать. Амен.



December 28, 2019

— Делай со своей жизнью всё что угодно. Напиши книгу, сделай тату, покрась волосы в сумасшедший цвет, признайся в любви уже наконец. Ведь когда-нибудь от тебя останется лишь тире между двумя датами, и никто не знает, когда же наступит это когда-нибудь. Просто почувствуй вкус свободы.

Принципиально не имея ничего против каждого отдельного маленького сумасшествия, что романтизируют эти бессознательные, не считая даже импульсивность сугубо негативным качеством, я чувствую некую неприязнь к тем, кто берет подобные слова себе за девиз.

В этом есть что-то жуткое.

Как если бы собаку посадили в тело человека, и она пересытилась безграничными в рамках своего мировоззрения возможностями.

Как если бы подобная мишура являлась инфантильным психологическим механизмом преодоления страха смерти — и жизни.

Как если бы наркоман на игле общественного одобрения одновременно испытывал ломку шокировать окружающих.

Как если бы привилегированный благами современной цивилизации застрял в затяжной ностальгии по обряду инициации.

...

as if libtards



November 20, 2019

Если гуглить "relation between grades in school and income", первые результаты демонстрируют статистическое доказательство прямой зависимости. Если гуглить "зависимость между оценками в школе и доходом", первые результаты пытаются доказать, что никакой зависимости нет, и вообще, это двоечники учатся вертеться и потом зарабатывают миллионы.

Нет, это не проблема поисковика. Это проблема культуры.



November 12, 2019

Привет всем нашедшим меня в местах для знакомств. А вас тоже удивляет, как мало там людей, и как никто никого не ищет? Вас тоже пугает, как охотно люди бракосочетаются с соседом по парте, когда вы переворачиваете каждый камень на планете, чтобы найти кого-то для комфортной долгосрочной дружбы?

Могу лишь предложить одну идею. Не ограничивайтесь местами с табличкой "Тут тебе рады, незнакомец, ибо тут искатели знакомств!" Вероятность успеха в большей мере зависит от вашей симпатии к человеку, а чем больше выборка, тем больше симпатичных людей. Пусть вашим местом для знакомств станет Вселенная.

...

Не полюбил соседа по парте — не полюбишь никого.



November 8, 2019

Abraj Al Bait, Mecca, Saudi Arabia. This thing scares me. I like it.



November 2, 2019

Я бегу со всех ног, чтобы устоять на месте. И я побегу в сотни раз быстрее, чтобы где-то оказаться.



October 10, 2019

Уныние — не столько болезнь телесная, сколько порок души, грех, который возникает там, где угасают вера в Бога и надежда на него. Грех предаваться унынию, когда есть другие грехи! Грех бедности. Грех слабоумия. Грех врождённых пороков. Грех незнания. Грех травмы. Грех уродства. Грех заблуждения. Грех одиночества. Грех слабости. Грех невнимательности. Грех неудачи. Грех поражения. Грех мягкосердечности. Грех посттравматического синдрома. Грех болезни. Грех несчастного случая.



October 9, 2019

> Студент-неформал в 13 лет, опекун-абьюзер в 15 и рок-музыкант среднего возраста в 17. Авторка «Афиши Daily» Милана Логунова вспомнила сексуальных партнеров, которые были у нее в подростковом возрасте, и встретилась с ними, чтобы поговорить о возрасте согласия и причинах, по которым взрослые мужчины встречаются с малолетками.

Действительно, очень интересно приоткрыть завесу этой тайны. Вот ещё что было бы узнать интересно. Почему она занималась этим со студентом-неформалом в 13 лет? Для чего ей нужен был опекун-абьюзер в 15? А рок-музыкант среднего возраста в 17?

"Мне просто не хотелось быть одинокой" трогает нетонкие струны души всего фем сообщества. Почему среди детей без какого-либо сексуального образования находятся как те, кто понимают, как справляться с одиночеством, так и те, кто этого не совсем понимают? Почему она сейчас так охотно рассказывает о своих опытах? Почему она называет женщину гинеколога "гинекологиней"?

В какой-то мере пациент укрепляет по крайней мере два занимательных исследования. Либерастия присутствует на генном уровне. Либералы менее чувствительны к угрозам.

Очень интересно. Статью не дочитал. Отвратительно.



October 6, 2019

Baby, how you doing? I know you're not doing the best, but I'm here,
I'll always be here.
Tell me if you need me and call me if you feelin' alone, 'сause I'm here,
I'm always right here.
Tell me that I'm dumb, I love to get numb, I know that I'm young,
But I'm still right here.
I don't give a fuck, I love who I love, and girl you're that one,
So I'll wait right here.

LiL PEEP - right here (w HORSE HEAD)



October 1, 2019

Запоминать сны здорово. Но особенно интересно становится, когда запоминаешь так много, что начинаешь различать паттерны, повторяющиеся сценарии и символы. Вот список некоторых замеченных мною мотивов в порядке от самых ранних до нынешних:

@ трудно контролируемая левитация, зачастую при помощи левитирующих предметов
@ испуг от неспособности убить уже необратимо покалеченное мною существо
@ пользование предназначенным для обеих полов общественным туалетом
@ наблюдение своего изуродованного лица после затруднительного вглядывания в зеркало
@ убийство колюще-режущими ударами в горло
@ осознание себя во сне, попытка задержаться, жадно глотая реальность вокруг всеми органами чувств
@ переход от неестественного бега на двух ногах к галопу на четвереньках



September 16, 2019

you always cry because no one helps you. no one helps you because you have no friends. you have no friends because you always cry



September 9, 2019

Every fall
I fall in love
with the Sun
even more



July 29, 2019

Решили изучать английский и не знаете с чего начать?
Перед вами сотня самых используемых слов английской речи.
Cотня слов, без которых невозможен ни один диалог с Носителем!
Сохраните на стену, чтобы не потерять!

pus — гной
sin — грех
harm — вред
rot — гнить
slave — раб
flaw — изъян
grief — горе
vice — порок
wound — рана
crypt — склеп
flesh — плоть
horror — ужас
lust — похоть
oath — клятва
plague — чума
prey — жертва
scourge — бич
abyss — бездна
destiny — удел
malice — злоба
void — пустота
conceal — таить
mortuary — морг
stray — плутать
threat — угроза
torture — пытка
decline — упадок
deprive — лишать
discord — раздор
endure — терпеть
exile — изгонять
massacre — резня
nausea — тошнота
pestilence — мор
pest — вредитель
rebel — мятежник
slaughter — убой
anxiety — тревога
curse — проклятие
disease — болезнь
execute — казнить
feeble — немощный
feral — одичавший
guile — коварство
implore — умолять
infect — заражать
infernal — адский
mortal — смертный
murder — убийство
starve — голодать
testament — завет
torment — мучение
betray — предавать
confine — заточать
conquer — покорять
cripple — калечить
decay — разложение
entomb — погребать
exhaust — истощать
extinct — вымерший
funeral — похороны
hermit — отшельник
interfere — мешать
misery — страдание
mourn — оплакивать
nightmare — кошмар
obey — подчиняться
poison — отравлять
seizure — припадок
violence — насилие
withdrawal — ломка
assault — нападение
cemetery — кладбище
compel — принуждать
crucify — распинать
disaster — бедствие
disdain — презирать
expose — подвергать
humiliate — унижать
infamous — позорный
remorse — раскаяние
sinister — зловещий
strangle — задушить
conspiracy — заговор
deceive — обманывать
destruct — разрушать
invasion — вторжение
obscure — безвестный
redundant — излишний
sorcery — колдовство
suppress — подавлять
unearthly — неземной
confession — исповедь
desperate — отчаянный
implicate — впутывать
renounce — отрекаться
resentful — обиженный
stumble — спотыкаться
abomination — мерзость
abuse — злоупотреблять
deaf-mute — глухонемой
eradicate — искоренять
mutilate — изувечивать
obedience — послушание
obfuscate — запутывать
squeamish — брезгливый
temptation — искушение
addiction — зависимость
aftermath — последствия
annihilate — уничтожaть
congenital — врожденный
deranged — ненормальный
inevitable — неминуемый
intimidate — запугивать
obsession — одержимость
revelation — откровение
contaminate — загрязнять
diabolical — дьявольский
exterminate — истреблять
faint — падать в обморок
hideous — отвратительный
lunatic — душевнобольной
refrain — воздерживаться
wicked — безнравственный
crusade — крестовый поход
defective — неполноценный
impunity — безнаказанность
disabled — нетрудоспособный
persecution — преследование
stillbirth — мертворождение
casualty — несчастный случай
incessant — непрекращающийся
sacrifice — жертвоприношение
malformation — порок развития
malevolent — недоброжелательный
premonition — плохое предчувствие



July 29, 2019

How nice he is, this child seated on a bench in the Tuileries Gardens! His fearless eyes flash forth at some invisible object far off in space. He can't be more than eight years old and yet does not enjoy himself as one might expect. He ought at the very least to laugh and stroll with some friend instead of staying alone: but it is not his nature.

How nice he is, this child seated on a bench in the Tuileries Gardens. Moved by a hidden purpose, a man comes and sits beside him on the same bench, with questionable demeanour. Who is he? No need to tell you, for you'll recognise him by his devious conversation. Let us listen, let's not disturb them.

— What are you thinking about, child?

— I was thinking of heaven.

— It's unnecessary for you to think of heaven: there's already enough to consider about earth. Are you tired of living, you who have barely been born?

— No, but everyone prefers heaven to earth.

— Well, not I. For since heaven, as well as earth, has been made by God, you may count on encountering up there the very same evils as here below. After your death, you will not be rewarded according to your deserts, for if injustices are done you on this earth (as you will find out later by experience) there is no reason why, in the next life, you will not be further wronged. The best thing for you to do is not to think of God and, since it is refused you, to make your own justice. Were one of your playmates to harm you, would you not be happy to kill him?

— But that's forbidden.

— Not as forbidden as you believe. It's only a matter of not letting oneself be caught. The justice laws purvey is worthless: what counts is the legal skill of the injured party. If you hated one of your playfellows, wouldn't you be unhappy upon reflecting that at every moment you might have the thought of him on your mind?

— That is true.

— So there's one of your companions who would make you unhappy all your life. For seeing that your hatred is only passive, he will merely continue to flout and harm you with impunity. There is, then, only one way of putting a stop to the situation, and that is to get rid of the enemy. Which is what I wanted to drive at--so as to make you aware of the foundations upon which present society is based. Each man must mete out his own justice: if he does not, he is simply an imbecile. He who gains victory over his fellow men is the slyest and strongest. Some day wouldn't you like to dominate your fellow men?

— Yes, yes.

— Then be the strongest and most wily. You are still too young to be the strongest, but from today forth you can use cunning, the finest weapon of men of genius. When David the shepherd struck giant Goliath on the forehead with a stone thrown from a sling, is it not wonderful to note that David vanquished his opponent solely by guile, and that had they, on the contrary, grappled together, the giant would have crushed him like a fly? The same applies to you. In open warfare you could never defeat men over whom you desire to exert your will, but by your cunning you could battle alone against all. Do you desire riches, fine palaces and fame? Or did you mislead me when assuring me of such lofty pretentions?

— No, no, I didn't mislead you. But I would like to acquire what I desire by other
means.

— In that case you will gain nothing whatever. Righteous and simple-minded methods lead nowhere. One must bring into play more forceful levers, weave more skilful plots. Before you become famous because of your virtue and achieve your end, a hundred others will have time to bound over your back and reach the winning post before you, so that then there will be no room for your narrow ideas. One must know how to clasp the horizon of the present with more grandeur. For example, have you never heard tell of the boundless glory victories bring? Yet victories do not come about of themselves. Blood, much blood, must be spilled to breed them and lay them at the conquerors' feet. Without the corpses and strewn limbs you see spread across the plain where carnage was so wisely wrought, there would be no war, and without war, no victory. You see when one wants to become famous one must wallow gracefully in rivers of blood fed by cannon-fodder. The end justifies the means. The first thing in becoming famous is to have money. Now since you have none, you must murder to get it. But as you are not strong enough to wield a dagger, be a thief, while waiting for your limbs to develop. And so that they develop the faster I advise you to do gymnastics twice daily, one hour in the morning, one in the evening. In this manner you can attempt crime, with some success, as soon as you are fifteen instead of waiting until twenty. The love of fame excuses everything, and later perhaps, when master of your fellow men, you will do them almost as much good as you did them ill in the beginning! ...

Maldoror perceives that inside his youthful interlocutor's head the blood boils: the nostrils flare, lips froth forth a fine white spray. He takes the boy's pulse: its beat races. Fever has overtaken the frail frame. Maldoror fears the consequences of his words. He makes himself scarce--the wretch--vexed at not being able to converse longer with this child. When in maturity it is so difficult to master the passions, balanced between good and evil, what about a mind still brimming with inexperience? And what relative amount of energy does it further require? The child will get off with three days' stay in bed. Heaven grant that maternal care may bring peace to this sensitive flower, fragile envelope of a fine soul!



July 27, 2019

Send nukes.

48.4701578, 35.0518614



July 23, 2019

Пессимисты: ничего не имеют. Когда им что-то нужно, плачут.
Оптимисты: имеют всё на свете. Когда им что-то нужно, протягивают руку.
Я: слепой пёс. Я: чую кровь.



July 21, 2019

Can't distinguish Japanese females from the Korean ones? Look for same dull outfits and greasy blunt bangs.



June 26, 2019

Список лучших девочек 2019!

7. Каждая 👏🏻
6. мать её 👏🏻
5. девочка 👏🏻
4. это 👏🏻
3. лучшая 👏🏻
2. девочка 👏🏻
1. Ты



June 9, 2019

The reason that religious language is so pervasive among transhumanists and AI enthusiasts (as in ‘enthusiasm’ from ‘en theos,’ possessed by the deity), is that their project is nothing less than the actual creation of a new religion or religions plural. Collectively I refer to these as ‘the computer-God religions’.

There are a few denominations. Singularitarianism (or ‘Singularitology’, by comparison with Scientology), Transhumanism, and Simulationism (Nick Bostrom’s contribution).

All of them have in common the idea that computers are the tools of deities (Bostrom) or will become deities themselves (Kurzweil et. al.). All of them have in common some form of immortality as an afterlife. All of them fulfill the core function of religion, that is to provide members with a deeply-felt sense of meaning and purpose in relation to something far greater than self.

But what all of them lack utterly is a moral code to limit the excesses of human behaviour. Thus ‘anything goes’ to achieve the desired purposes and personal goals including immortality.

...

Grimes feat. HANA - We Appreciate Power



June 4, 2019

"Например, поступать себе наперекор, в течение дня делать всё, чего тебе делать не хочется: захотел сесть на стул — стоять, хочется спать — не спать, хочется включить телевизор — сломать его. И в некий момент начинает что-то такое происходить."

...

Чтобы делать то, что делать не хочется, нужно захотеть делать то, что делать не хочется, увы. Блаженны голодные! Ибо насытится чрево желающего. Как мне повысить аппетит?

Помогите.



May 29, 2019

Порою под дождём кислотным
Бывает мучительно приятно,
И едкие капельки огненным градом
Впиваются, впитывая в тело яд.

Одежда и волосы ссыпаются вниз,
И кровь просачивается сквозь кожу,
И нос заточенный тянешь ты ввысь,
Пока смотреть ты больше не можешь.

Порою в поле радиации
Бывает мучительно приятно,
Давай закружим этот немирный атом
В завораживающем танце.

Пусть разрывают землю крики и кровь
Просачивается сквозь воздух,
Я умираю, друг родной, беги,
Но я боюсь уже слишком поздно.

Лена Б.



April 13, 2019

Мне жаль тех замечательных ребят, что не видят смысла плакаться окружающим, наносить себе увечья, глотать снотворное за пол часа до прихода родителей. Их не поддерживают окружающие, их не водят по больницам, им не выписывают антидепрессанты. Первым и последним показателем чего-то неладного в жизни таких людей для невнимательно наблюдателя будет суицид, удавшийся с первой попытки.

"...Ибо слишком часто я видел жалость, которая заблуждается. Но нас поставили над людьми, мы не вправе тратить себя на то, чем можно пренебречь, мы должны смотреть в глубь человеческого сердца. Я отказываю в сочувствии ранам, выставленным напоказ, которые трогают сердобольных женщин, отказываю умирающим и мертвым. И знаю почему.

Были времена в моей юности, когда я жалел гноящихся нищих. Я нанимал им целителей, покупал притирания и мази. Караваны везли ко мне золотой бальзам далекого острова для заживления язв. Но я увидел, мои нищие расковыривают свои болячки, смачивают их навозной жижей, — садовник так унавоживает землю, выпрашивая у нее багряный цветок, — и понял: смрад и зловоние — сокровища попрошаек. Они гордились друг перед другом своими язвами, бахвалились дневным подаянием, и тот, кому досталось больше других, возвышался в собственных глазах как верховный жрец при самой прекрасной из кумирен. Только из тщеславия приходили мои нищие к моему целителю, предвкушая, как поразит его обилие их зловонных язв. Защищая место под солнцем, они трясли изъязвленными обрубками, попечение о себе почитали почестями, примочки — поклонением. Но, выздоровев, ощущали себя ненужными, не питая собой болезнь, — бесполезными, и во что бы то ни стало стремились вернуть себе свои язвы. И, вновь сочась гноем, самодовольные и никчемные, выстраивались они с плошками вдоль караванных дорог, обирая путников во имя своего зловонного бога.

Во времена моей юности я сочувствовал смертникам. Мне казалось, осужденный мною на смерть в пустыне угасает, изнемогая от безнадежного одиночества. Тогда я не знал, что в смертный час нет одиночества. Не знал и о снисходительности умирающих. Хотя видел, как себялюбец или скупец, прежде громко бранившийся из-за каждого гроша, собирает в последний час домочадцев и с безразличием справедливости оделяет, как детей побрякушками, нажитым добром. Видел, как трус, который прежде при малейшей опасности истошно звал на помощь, получив смертельную рану, молчит, заботясь не о себе — о товарищах. Мы с восхищением говорим: "Какое самоотвержение!" Но в нем я заметил и затаенное небреженье. Я понял, почему умирающий от жажды отдал последний глоток соседу, а умирающий с голоду отказался от корки хлеба. Они успели забыть, что значит жаждать, и в царственном забвении отстранили от себя кость, в которую вгрызутся другие.

Я видел женщин, они плакали о погибших. Они плакали, потому что мы слишком много врали. Ты же знаешь, как возвращаются с войны уцелевшие, сколько они занимают места, как громко похваляются подвигами, какой ужасной изображают смерть. Еще бы! Они тоже могли не вернуться. Но вернулись и гибелью товарищей устрашают теперь всех вокруг. В юности и я любил окружать себя ореолом сабельных ударов, от которых погибли мои друзья. Я приходил с войны, потрясая безысходным отчаянием тех, кого разлучили с жизнью. Но правду о себе смерть открывает только своим избранникам; рот их полон крови, они зажимают распоротый живот и знают: умереть не страшно. Собственное тело для них — инструмент, он пришел в негодность, сломался, стал бесполезным, и, значит, настало время его отбросить. Испорченный, ни на что не годный инструмент. Когда телу хочется пить, умирающий видит: тело томится жаждой, и рад избавиться от тела. Еда, одежда, удовольствия не нужны тому, для кого и тело — незначащая часть обширного имения, вроде осла на привязи во дворе..."

...

Пока лил пипы поют о своих попытках суицида, неудавшихся в перерывах между сексом, принятием наркотиков, и сжиганием денег, тот, чьё имя ты никогда не узнаешь, плачет в сырой холодной яме среди разложения и боли покуда хватает сил, и разрывается кошмарными снами когда силы покидают его.



April 7, 2019

What do you see when you hear "I hate my body"? I bet some average-looking girl letting the world know she doesn't find her appearance appealing enough. Our society has such a naive cause for the complaint.

If only one could look beyond the skin and see all the garbage it covers.

"I admit it is difficult to even think encased in this rotting piece of meat. The stink of it filling every breath, a suffocating cloud you can't escape. Disgusting. How pathetically fragile it is. Nothing this weak is meant to survive".



March 17, 2019

If you ever thought LGBT people are just the same as any other because that is what they told you on streets, mind some statistics.

⚠ Trigger warning: facts ⚠

Gay men, who are ~2% of the US population, account for 83% of the country’s syphilis cases: http://www.cdc.gov/msmhealth/STD.htm 

Gay men are 15 times more likely to have Hepatitis B than everyone else: http://www.cdc.gov/msmhealth/viral-hepatitis.htm 

Active homosexual men are 17 times more likely than straight people to have anal cancer: https://www.americanthinker.com/articles/2015/12/the_gay_agenda_and_the_real_world.html 

Gay men are 12 times more likely to use amphetamines than straight men, 10 times more likely to use heroin. 25% of gay and transgender people abuse alcohol, compared to 5 to 10% of the general population: https://www.americanprogress.org/issues/lgbtq-rights/reports/2012/03/09/11228/why-the-gay-and-transgender-population-experiences-higher-rates-of-substance-use/ 

LGBT adolescents are 90% more likely to use substances than their heterosexual peers: https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC2680081 

Homosexuals have a life expectancy of less than 50 years: https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/9923159 https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC3093261

Compared to straight men, gay men are more likely to do jail time. Compared to straight women, lesbian women are even more likely to do jail time.



February 4, 2019

Who wants to learn Dovahkiin with me?

https://www.youtube.com/embed/lxQjwbUiM9w



January 5, 2019

Знаете, чем прекрасна Википедия, помимо своего маскота? Нейтральной, мать её, точкой зрения. Этому мастерству богов не научат ни в школах, ни в семьях.



October 31, 2018

Удивительное чувство — Ненависть. Как Тьму надо отделять от грязи, так и Ненависть — от желания мелких пакостей, от истерики и аффектов.

Истинная Ненависть греет сердце, но оставляет холодной голову. Ненависть — одно из сильнейших и продуктивных чувств. Она может дать первый толчок к становлению, поможет вырваться из болота... стадия nigredo однозначно содержит это чувство и преодолевается в том числе и благодаря ему. Ненависть к врагу даёт возможности, которые недостижимы в обычном состоянии. Perdurabo! — девиз становления, который не зря использовал А. Кроули.

Ненависть так же естественна, как дыхание. Если попытаться «найти начало», то окажется, что Ненависть — это реакция противодействия врагу, посягнувшему на то, что ценно для данного индивида. Здесь Ненависть — это катализатор проявления силы и ума. Ненависть—это деятельное проявление Гордости.

Именно поэтому «светлые» проклинают и искореняют как Ненависть, так и Гордость, одни из наиболее сильных сторон индивида (да, и человека — тоже). Лишить индивида Ненависти — всё равно, что кастрировать его, только эмоционально. А потом — бери овцу голыми руками.



October 26, 2018

— Теперь ты будешь погибать со смеху.
— Ну, — ответил маленкий ребёнок, — зелёная скорбь сказала, что зрелище происходит из тайны моего замысла.

Пустое эго позволяет мне эксперементировать и выражать мышление. Нет надежды сбежать из мира сего.

Храни свою кровь охраняемой, чтобы потом их смешил смешил смешил смешил смешил.

Я упивался вторым посланием: тайной, создавшей родителей в ребёнке.

В коридорах детских слов и развивающих центров можно увидеть цветы коммунистов.

Крохотный огонь считает, что немного полезнее снова экспериментировать с мальчиками.

Странная вещь, совершенно один.

Ролевые повешения пробуют уродливую анонимную ненависть.

Предсмертное наслаждение, как и личность, предполагает тёмный мир и живое пространство.

Он сказал ей:
Блаженны познавшие здорового Отца.

— У меня мало геноцида.
— А от несчастного случая и нужды у тебя закончилось свободное место. Ты ушёл в страшный образец.

Детские тонкие рабы настаивали.

Сказал Иисус:
Они страдают во сто крат сильнее!

На наслаждение ребёнка можно реагировать агонией и ударами:
Ты не хочешь рассказать мне о картине?

Рисунок должен иметь смысл в преддверии праздника. Ни для кого нет надежды сбежать из хора, даже заглушая их голос.

Неужели рассуждение было ничтожным или среднестатистическим для ещё большего убийства?

Нам всем не хватает практики голодного раскаянья.

Это живая вселенная, у которой нет ни искусства, ни заблокировавшего Христа. Человек согласился. Приготовьте бумагу.

Замечательная дыра применялась против коммунистов, а в слепящее время — против исламских коммунистов.

Стоял я сегодня на странице и решил страдать прежде ночной темноты. Часы кишечных богов и смешные подарки.

У меня страх совершить ошибку, что жребий предназначил в мире, окруженном бесконечной пустой чернотой.

Мне приснилось, как ребёнок умирает от слышащего Сатаны, и я нуждаюсь рассказать об этом Вечности, в которую он влюблён.

Дурак! Если у бумаги вообще есть следующий том, то должен быть свободный замысел и в высоком мире.

На ныне структурированной странице я ещё описывал безумный опыт поиска неба смерти. Не страдать по кошмару возможно звонкой луны.

Уровень преступности в Сингапуре — один из самых высоких в игре, при этом законы в Сингапуре достаточно красивые.

Я второй год на успокоительных с плохими мирами. Дикое одинаковое время делало пространства. Мечты танцуют на твоих мутациях. Лай иисусов.

Сказал Иисус:
Адам возник из великой силы и скрипящей вселенной.

Тёмный подлинный крохотный риск – это смешные разрывающиеся пустые семена.

В три года мой сын Майлз любил реализовать красивые краски для страдания.

Образцы навязывают определённую идею и направляют процесс, в том числе предусмотрена и применяется смертная казнь.

Движение навстречу большей тьме. Вечный ад, где инвалиды под капельницей жизни удивляются порождению ещё благих мужчин.

Малыш предпочитает склеивать полоски бумаги по-своему, возненавидит своего отца, подобно человеку, осознавшему то малое, что должно быть.

Глядя на меня, жертва выяснила: когда в боли скопируешь по-своему хорошо искусственный сад нескончаемых листов, полезут больше. И не экспериментируй над их полным раскаянием. Ибо зачем что-то выдумывать, когда детские существа, вроде тёмного человека с голодом, уже стоят. Я рисую вразрез.

Общая старуха в диких группировках!

Ищущего не сожрали, воспитали и приютили дикие колоссальные перемены.

Однажды, глядя на меня мальчиками, сегодняшняя жизнь приветствовала: когда изношу, увидишь, всегда в горы. Ключевой язык поблизости, заговорим поплотнее выражениеми. Не окружу, разрывайся над их личным удовольствием, ибо происходит возможность взрослой смерти. Бабушкина вещь, которой томимы все: и ты, и я, и все унылые и слышащие мозги пахнущей проницательности.

Я упивался смешным морем: усопшими детьми разрывающихся псов.

Я помогу, но ты должен сделать это сам. Он послал смешной голос, чтобы визжать и плакать, уснуть и вариться в земле.



October 26, 2018

Boy, let me tell ya, I sure do love teen movies. Crazy parties 🍾 First love 😍 First sex 😳 Taking drugs 💀 Running from cops 🏃 Datings and breakups 😱 Crippling depression 😭 Revolt against teachers and parents ✊ Inside jokes 😅 Cussing a lot 🖕 Self-identity issues 😔 If you don't like teen movies 😵 feel free to write me, there is a chance that you are not retarded.



October 13, 2018

As a strong gender equality supporter I am really concerned about the problem that is not so eagerly advertised. Could we please start working on becoming equal in this? https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gender_differences_in_suicide 
Thank you.



September 25, 2018

Под различными постами о психологии и воспитании иногда можно наблюдать молодых мамаш, вот прочитавших о чём-то, что делать не стоит, разрывающихся в своих рассуждениях между паттернами козёл отпущения и золотой ребёнок и выходящих победителями с фразой и так не сяк, и сяк не эдак, и вообще насколько же это героический труд, я второй год на успокоительных с антидепрессантами. Однако о героизме это конечно не говорит ровным счётом ничего, просто животное было обрюхачено без понятия о том, что должно происходить после.

"Дети случая и нужды", так называл людей Силен у Аристотеля ещё до рождества Христова, и с тех пор мало чего изменилось. Почти половина беременностей на планете сегодня являются незапланированными. Этот забавный факт однако мало что значит для новорождённого в современных реалиях, будь ты хоть трижды запланированным, у социума нет должного понимания того, как обращаться с детьми, а разобраться родителю самому не хватит ума. А если и хватило бы, ему это не особо и нужно, ибо зачем что-то выдумывать когда очевидные вещи вроде кнута с пряником работают уже какое поколение и ты властен лепить из отпрыска что угодно.

Тяжело сказать, горе утраты или же прямое отсутствие родителя создаёт в мире такую большую долю политиков, учёных, миллионеров, различного рода творческих личностей и конечно героев сказок. А с превалирующим культом семьи говорить об этом и вовсе неполиткорректно. Уже сейчас можно видеть как консерваторы пытаются противостоять предпосылкам уничтожения института семьи, хоть они и борются ещё даже не имея против кого бороться. Ведь всё что было предпринято в глобальном масштабе это разве что пролитие света на бесполезность брака и попытка сгладить семейные гендерные роли. Если же кто-то знает о чём-то ещё релевантном и серьёзном кроме программ коммунистов на бумаге, я буду рад услышать.

Такое благое дело как разрушение традиционного института семьи не видится мне ни возможным, ни рациональным до наступления того момента в истории, когда будут изобретены надёжные искусственные утробы. Пожалуй, первая отрасль, куда бы я инвестировал. Только с их помощью можно будет создать фундаментально новое общество, в котором будет обеспечиваться суверенность индивидуальности. Общество, где инвалиды под капельницей продвинутой медицины перестанут порождать ещё больших инвалидов. Где остановится круговорот воспитания нарциссов, где не станут прививать предрассудки под видом бесценного опыта, где отпадёт мнимая необходимость в драме, в одобрении, во "второй половинке". Где человек наконец-то будет рождаться целым.

Конечно, будучи настолько ключевым инструментом, искусственная утроба останется всего лишь инструментом, и ответственным органам прийдётся приложить немало усилий, главным образом исследовательского характера, чтобы всё это реализовать. Вряд ли кто-то станет отрицать, что современные детские дома уступают сегодняшней среднестатистической семье. Но игнорировать проблему и продолжать держать двуногих обезьян ответственными за вынашивание и переработку каждого индивида — преступление против всего человечества.



September 20, 2018

— Hello, good people of the Internet. I am a NOMAP, which is non-offending minor attracted person. I fully realize that I am a deranged mental invalid, I seek therapy and confess at a local church regularly. And I am trying to stay away from kids as far as possible to prevent the harm. I just wish society would stop attacking me because of my decease…
— If you cared you would have already been castrated disgusting I am so disgusted why don't you kill yourself watch your kids people!
@
— I may want a toddler, an elderly or an animal and I may want it alive or dead. To abuse, to rape and to kill a being is a birthright I shall fulfill whenever my will desires.
— Understandable. Have a good day, sir.



September 7, 2018

Not minding that it hurts.

And although I've not tried to apply this lifestyle myself, the only idea feels relieving. It is funny, but Lawrence said "Don't think about the pain", revealing his trick in the Russian translation, which obviously has a completely different meaning.

It feels very stoic. And while I admit that mindful Stoicism could be highly rewarding, I am not the only one who sees it as an ideology full of pitfalls of becoming a content loser. So why's that? Well, as William B. Irvine noted in one of his books, a committed stoic becomes a collector of insults. Each disaster turns into a welcome test for his tranquility, with death being his ultimate test.

As it may well be an efficient practice for getting rid of irritability and pity, as well as for filling your life with a peaceful joy, is it really worth it? Probably for a life of a soldier. But I have so much more admiration for those who would rather "rage against the dying of the light" than find peace with their destiny.

https://www.youtube.com/embed/ZPjmDiJyzSE



August 30, 2018

Свиньи, подобные ему, по умолчанию приходят на землю, чтобы быть разрезанными целыми семьями, чтобы визжать и плакать, и в итоге, уснув после боли, вариться в кишечном соку. Мало того, что Бентли не сожрали, воспитали и приютили, его еще и выхаживают, больного и страшного. Целуют его облысевшее уродливое лицо в лоб.



August 14, 2018

Содомиты танцуют на твоих костях, Доминик Веннер, и я рядом с ними.



August 14, 2018

To everything there is a season, and a time for every purpose under the sun. A time to love, and a time to hate. A time of war, and a time of peace. And this is the time of war. This is the time to hate!

— King Ecbert, Vikings



August 9, 2018

Sometimes I wish I could command "Stop. Lose all scripted responses. Improvisation only" and that would affect our hosts. Hearing identical not only words but very intonations makes me sick.



July 14, 2018

Странная вещь, из детства я хорошо запомнил легенду про преследование Христа Сатаной. То ли убегая, то ли не ведая о преследователе, Иисус попросил очень праведного человека перенести его через реку. Тот согласился не раздумывая, и нести ему было так же легко, будто на его спине никого и не было. Вернувшись обратно, человека встретил другой незнакомец с такой же просьбой. Человек согласился, но по мере продвижения в реку вес незнакомца на его плечах становился совсем нечеловеческим. Быть может, тогда он осознал какому злу способствует, и несмотря на это, несмотря на возможную гибель, не сбросил он незнакомца в реку.

Мне нравится эта история. Однако всё, что я нахожу похожего сейчас, это история о великане Христофоре, что переправлял на своей спине маленького Христа. Дойдя до середины брода, Христофор ощутил на своих плечах невыносимую тяжесть, но ребёнок стал успокаивать его тем, что он несёт на себе весь мир вместе с его творителем. И куда делся Сатана из моих воспоминаний?



July 11, 2018

How I shrieked out I know not what strange words! And the poor good old man tried all he could to calm me; he thought I was mad! The fool! I was in the death struggle with self: God and Satan fought for my soul those three long hours. God conquered - now I have only one doubt left – which of the twain was God?



June 21, 2018

So many nursery rhymes all around the world are (inappropriately?) dark, but I really like Incy Wincy Spider one. Even when you realize it's usually sung in endless cycles. Life is a struggle! Which does not by any means imply you have to suffer from it, but that is another story.

Incy wincy spider climbed up the waterspout,
Down came the rain and washed the spider out,
Out came the sun and dried up all the rain,
So Incy wincy spider climbed up the spout again.



June 20, 2018

I was thinking about writing some thoughts about xxxtentacion and pewdiepie a day ago, and I've just found out the former is dead, so why not. The inspiration is taken from the attached video. I have not delved into the details of what I'm going to write about but that's how it looks like.

So. I do not really like xxxtentacion, he's an okayish musician and a shitty person. Still I do respect him more than pewdy pie as a media person. He does what he wants. If he wills to hung some white kid on TV he does it. He won't apologize for that scared to lose five percent of his followers, he'd rather say that it was a message for the racist scum to make the world a better place. He makes his followers being himself. And now this warrior is shot by another black, well played.

And pewdiepie's attempts to do numbers are just pathetic. Like that time promising to delete his account when there would be enough followers. He's a nice guy, but singing "pewdiepie is a child rapist" in one video and begging for forgiveness for saying "nigger" in another. The sorry video was subtle, but still. He makes his followers being social acceptable and using dirty moves.

https://www.youtube.com/embed/2n2a3nH8jEI



May 21, 2018

Left-wing art:
• "Me and my schizophrenia" performance
• Paintings out of menstrual blood
• People lined up in rainbow pallet
• "He will not divide us" chanting for 24 hours
• Indie rock

Right-wing art:
• DO YOU WANT
• TOTAL WAR?
• TO SEE LIFE'S WILL
• RETURN ONCE MORE?
• DO YOU WANT
• MIGHT TO PREVAIL?
• TO KICK ASIDE
• THE WEAK AND FRAIL?
• TO SMITE YOUR FOES
• THAT THEY MIGHT DIE?
• TO SPLATTER BLOOD
• ACROSS THE SKY?
• DO YOU WANT
• TOTAL WAR?
• YES, YOU WANT
• TOTAL WAR!



May 19, 2018

Successful Children Who Lost A Parent — Why Are There So Many Of Them?

Malcolm Gladwell points out in his new book, the death of a mother or father is a spur, a propellant that sends them catapulting into life. Because they are on their own, they are forced to persist, to invent, to chart their own way — into a curious category Gladwell dubs "eminent orphans."

There are, he reports, a lot of them. Historian Lucille Iremonger discovered that 67 percent of British prime ministers from the start of the 19th century to the start of World War II lost a parent before the age of 16.

Twelve presidents — George Washington, Thomas Jefferson, James Monroe, Andrew Jackson, Andrew Johnson, Rutherford Hayes, James Garfield, Grover Cleveland, Herbert Hoover, Gerald Ford, Bill Clinton and Barack Obama — lost their fathers while they were young.

A psychologist, Marvin Eisenstadt, poured through a number of major encyclopedias, looking for people whose biographies "merited more than one column" — and of 573 people, Gladwell reports, "a quarter had lost at least one parent before the age of 10. By age 15, 34.5 percent had had at least one parent die, and by the age of 20, 45 percent. Even for the years before the 20th century, when life expectancy due to illness and accidents and warfare was much lower than it is today, those are astonishing numbers."

Gladwell doesn't come out and say that losing a parent early increases one's chances of success later. But in study after study, among those who have succeeded, the incidence of "eminent orphans" is oddly high.



May 13, 2018

Мне приснилось, как один хороший мальчик умирает от несчастного случая, и я иду рассказать об этом девочке, в которую он влюблён. Она радуется такой новости, что меня очень расстраивает, так как этот мальчик и есть я. Я отдаю ей свою еду, она берёт её и заходит во временную петлю, где встречает меня маленького в первый раз, добро приветствует, кормит и обнимает.

November 2, 2022

... Что заставляет меня маленького влюбиться.



May 12, 2018

O Lord, make me feel myself worth my Hatred.



April 27, 2018

Current Value — JS Bach for machines

Current Value - Posthuman



April 23, 2018

День богов равен году людей.



March 31, 2018

В мире столько же гендеров, сколько в нём рас.

...

Раса рабов и раса господ, если что.



March 25, 2018

Finally some scandal makes people consider using that black hat scum and #deletefacebook. Collecting the data is okay with me, making that unusable garbage the most popular social network in the word isn't.



March 11, 2018

1. Это слова сокровенные, которые сказал Иисус Живой. Записал их Дидим Иуда Фома. И он сказал, что нашедший истолкование этих слов не вкусит смерти.

2. Сказал Иисус: Пусть ищущий не перестаёт искать, пока не найдёт.
И когда найдёт, он возмутится.
И когда возмутится, он удивится и воцарится над всем.

3. Сказал Иисус: Если скажут вам ведущие вас: «вот, царство в небе», – птицы небесные опередят вас.
Если они скажут, что оно в море, рыбы опередят вас,
но царство внутри вас и вне вас.
Когда вы познаете себя, тогда вы будете познаны, и поймёте, что вы дети Отца Живого.
Если же не познаете себя, то вы пребываете в нищете, и вы – нищета.

4. Сказал Иисус: Старый человек в его дни не замедлит спросить семидневного младенца о месте жизни и будет жить.
...

16. Сказал Иисус: Возможно, люди думают, что Я пришёл бросить мир в мир,
и они не знают, что Я пришёл бросить на землю разделения: огонь, меч, войну.

41. Сказал Иисус: Имеющему в руке будет дано,
а у не имеющего и то малое, что он имеет, будет отнято.

55. Сказал Иисус: Тот, кто не возненавидит своего отца и свою мать, не сможет стать Мне учеником,
и если не возненавидит своих братьев и сестёр, и не возьмёт свой крест, как Я, не будет достоин Меня.

63. Сказал Иисус: Был человек богатый, обладающий большим имуществом.
Он сказал: «Я употреблю своё имущество, чтобы посеять, пожать, вырастить, наполнить мои амбары плодами, чтобы не нуждаться ни в чём».
Так думал он в своём сердце. И в ту же ночь он умер.
...

65. Он сказал: У доброго человека был виноградник. Он отдал его виноградарям, чтобы они возделывали его.
Он послал своего раба, чтобы виноградари отдали ему плод виноградника.
Они схватили его раба и избили, едва не умертвив его.
Раб пришёл, рассказал своему господину. Его господин сказал: «Возможно, они не узнали его».
Он послал другого раба, виноградари избили и его.
Тогда господин послал своего сына. Он сказал: «Может быть, они постыдятся моего сына».
Эти виноградари, зная, что он наследник виноградника, схватили его и умертвили.
...

69. Блаженны те, кого преследовали, в сердце своем. Они – познавшие Отца в истине.
Блаженны голодные, ибо насытится чрево желающих.

79. Женщина в толпе сказала Ему: Блаженно чрево, носившее Тебя, и сосцы, вскормившие Тебя!
Он сказал ей: Блаженны слышавшие слово Отца. Они сохранили его в истине.
Ибо настанут дни, когда вы скажете: «Блаженно чрево не зачавшее и сосцы не питавшие».

85. Сказал Иисус: Адам возник из великой силы и великого богатства, и он не был достоин вас.
Ибо если бы он был достоин, он не вкусил бы смерти.

94. Сказал Иисус: Ищущий найдёт,
и стучащему отворят.

98. Сказал Иисус: Царство Отца подобно человеку, желающему умертвить человека сильного.
Он извлёк меч в своём доме, он воткнул его в стену, чтобы узнать, что его рука будет крепка.
Тогда он убил сильного.

...

Thus spoke Jesus



March 7, 2018

This bread I eat this oath I swear
As I enflame myself with prayer
There is no grace there is no guilt
There is the law do what thou wilt



March 7, 2018

Our Father, which art in heaven,
Hallowed be thy Name;
Thy kingdom come;
Thy will be done
in earth, as it is in heaven.
Give us this day our daily bread;
And forgive us our trespasses,
as we forgive them that trespass against us;
And lead us not into temptation,
But deliver us from evil.
For thine is the kingdom,
the power, and the glory,
For ever and ever.
Amen.



February 6, 2018

— У меня страх социума.
— Ваай, как мы тебя понимаем! Скорее полезай к нам под одеялко, будем дрочить друг дружке и бояться социума вместе :3
@
— У меня страх государства.
— Ты что ебанутый? Ты что из этих, которые верят во всемирные заговоры, людей-рептилий и конец света? Бля не отвечай, просто... просто уёбывай в свой бункер.



February 6, 2018

Уровень преступности в Сингапуре — один из самых низких в мире, при этом законы в Сингапуре достаточно суровые (в том числе предусмотрена и применяется смертная казнь). Проявления межэтнической вражды и ненависти караются законом (учитываются даже дискуссии в Интернете).

Некоторые преступления караются битьём палками. Особо жестокие убийства и торговля наркотиками караются смертной казнью через повешение. В период с 1991 по 2004 год было приведено в исполнение 420 смертных приговоров (за злоупотребление наркотиками) — это один из наиболее высоких показателей в мире.

Согласно закону Internal Security Act, для приговора члену триады (мафиозной группировки) достаточно было показаний трёх свидетелей о причастности к триаде. При этом свидетели оставались анонимными (но не для правоохранительных органов), так как в ином случае люди отказались бы давать показания. В результате триады были ликвидированы в Сингапуре. Аналогичная процедура применялась против коммунистов, а в настоящее время — против исламских террористов.



February 1, 2018

Why Adventure Time? 🔥🌍🔥
♻ Dirty jokes
♻ Rape jokes
♻ Death jokes
♻ Your mama jokes
♻ "Take that bag off your udder. You're beautiful, girl! You live in the forest, so why don't you just let it hang out? Eww... Put that bag back on!"
♻ "We can rule them, like gods!.. Angry gods."
♻ "당연하지! 난 제이크랑 항상 한 몸이 되는데"
♻ "Stompin' on ants, suckin' their souls"
♻ Gender bender the whole Universe
♻ Lonely guy that trying hard to make some peeps his friends being stripped by the peeps and thrown in jail for nudity
♻ Throwing beloved ones into nonexistence by accident, erasing memories about that person
♻ Boy that trying hard to be a good guy forgets his son for a few months in hide and seek game
♻ Trying to feel better with revenge and chaotic sexual experiences
♻ Turning birds inside out for fun
♻ Man versus government
♻ Regular body modifications
♻ Beings hierarchy, plenty of dimensions
♻ Reincarnations, astral plans, bad trips, all sorts of perversions, occultism, time loops, space loops
♻ Bonnibel
♻ Dozen concepts references
♻ "Glob is dead"
♻ "Do what thoust will be the whole piece of Law" and apparent throughout appeal to free will and love
♻ "Shmowzow!"

Fun fact.

I missed that whole piece of law reference the first time, I just felt like the show was somewhat thelemic and googled something like "Adventure time and Aleister Crowley" to see if someone feels the same and the attached video popped up and I was like WOW.

"Glob is dead" was too obvious reference to Nietzsche, still I searched a bit and discovered that the whole episode the phrase was in was pretty whole nietzscheic.

There are ought to be many overlooked concepts out of my erudition. The "open door philosophy" resembles some law of attraction.

The attitude to death is also an interesting point. It's not just that it's typically shown amoral for fun, no. Jake mocking Finn, feigning crying "Waaaah, I cry when people die. Waaah, I'm Finn" or telling some gnome to die because "why not, you've had a good run" was another wow to me.

Fun fact. I dropped the show two times somewhere near the long Marceline story. She sucks so hard.



January 26, 2018

Он сказал, Бог велел ему это сделать. Он сказал, его отец — это Бог, а его мать — шлюха; мать всех войн.

Coil - An Unearthly Red Live Four



January 14, 2018

"I'd been reading [Oxford professor and philosopher] Nick Bostrom's stuff about artificial intelligence, and in the course of reading that, someone—Nick or some other thinker—suggested a scenario where far more evolved beings than we are would just ignore us, the way we ignore animals and insects. We wouldn't pose a big enough risk to them to deserve eradication. That thought scared me so much—imagining a cyborg ignoring you."



January 7, 2018

Из-под света птички сияющей, зелёные замыслы изготавливают.

...

Родители иногда это каракули или кляксы, за четвёртой тенью маленького человека.

Я знаю, что изучать, потому что сам это рисовал.

...

Тут очень индивидуально: у меня по-прежнему остается лишь сознание того, что это кромешная и сырая тьма.



January 1, 2018

Некоторые относятся к болестным восоминаниям, как принято относится к умершим людям. Не страдать по усопшему идёт вразрез обывательской морали. "Неужели человек недостоен скорби?" Их оплакивание чтит память, их самобичевание избавляет их от вины, их горе выражает эмпатию. "Неужели моё страдание было ничтожным или недостаточным для ещё большего страдания?"

https://www.youtube.com/embed/TFGz6Qvg1CE



December 25, 2017

...

Кто не понял, это иллюстрация одного из основных мотивов Последнего Завета: Снисхождение Корпорации. Мы-то знаем, что это не корона на голове первого homo nouveau...



December 3, 2017

Good self-hatred is the cure from the self-pity. Not the equal thing.

Hate itself is almost like Love.



November 13, 2017

Однажды я написал Дугину и спросил про его отношение к синхрониям Юнга. "Это очень важно, Вселенная спасает", — ответил он. Так похоже, что за синхроничностью, сигилизацией, трансерфингом, законом притяжения фильма "Секрет" и всем прочим стоит что-то общее и очень простое. Неужели ранее никто не пытался описать это в простой незавуалированной форме? Ведь подобное практиковалось ещё со времен наскальных рисунков.



November 11, 2017

Камрады! Подозреваю что Вы каким либо образом мечтаете служить демонам. Для того что бы служить демонам а не чему либо еще - следует их найти. Вот примечательное местечко. Воспоминания - очень странная нематериальная ниша, наполненная нематериальными вещами, каждая из которых вопит что она настоящая, находящаяся там потому что сбывшаяся, хотя на тех же основаниях могла там быть изначально, или попасть посторонним образом. И в любом случае — она нематериальная, несуществующая, и подлежащая соответствующего к ней отношения. Но нереальность, это такая особая реальность, и если к такой вещи относится как к настоящей, она будет обретать некоторые настоящие свойства. Болючие воспоминания - они склонны поражать если относиться к ним серьезно. Внимайте - если воспоминание при взаимодействии оживает и атакует, нанося ущерб, и высасвая жизненные силы - это демон. И пока Вы внимаете ему, вызываете его, лелеете его, кормите его собой - Вы верные его слуги.

— Лена Бородач, 10 сентября 2012



October 30, 2017

The joy of the godless lasts but a moment, the mirth of the wicked is forever.



October 28, 2017

Преувеличивая значимость приятных и неприятных переживаний, люди вырабатывают в себе ничем не оправданную склонность жаловаться на судьбу. Мы посланы в этот мир не для наслаждений. Удовольствие не в состоянии придать нам смысл жизни. А если так, то отсутствие удовольствия не умаляет смысла жизни. Для оценки мелодии неважно, мажорная она или минорная.

Страдание не лишено смысла, ибо страдая, мы внутренне как бы отодвигаемся от того, что вызвало наши страдания. Страдая, мы все время остаемся между тем, что есть в действительности, и тем, что должно быть. В страдании сам факт отчаяния снимает вину с человека. Страдание вызывает плодотворное, кардинально преобразующее духовное напряжение, которое на эмоциональном уровне помогает человеку осознать то, чему следует быть.

В страданиях человека открывается глубокая мудрость, которая выше всякого рассудка. Для внутренней жизни скорбь и раскаяние полны глубокого смысла.

...

Но есть смысл и в той жизни, что почти полностью лишена возможности творчества и наслаждения, и которая допускает только одну возможность поведения на высоком моральном уровне: оно выражается в отношении человека к своему существованию, ограниченному внешними силами. Творчество и наслаждение у него отняты. Но не только творчество и наслаждение имеют смысл. Если в жизни вообще есть смысл, то должен быть смысл и в страдании. Страдание — неотделимая часть жизни, как судьба и смерть. Без страдания и смерти человеческая жизнь не может быть полной.



October 23, 2017

You are what you pretend to be. Pretend harder.

Fake it till you make it. Russian does not have such aphorisms. It has "A beard doesn't make a philosopher" though. It also has "There's no science without a torture", "You can not jump above your head" and "Only grave will cure the hunchback".

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Linguistic_relativity



October 10, 2017

Из-под покрова тьмы ночной,
Из чёрной ямы страшных мук
Благодарю я всех Богов
За мой непокорённый дух.

И я, попав в тиски беды,
Не дрогнул и не застонал,
И под ударами судьбы
Я ранен был, но не упал.

Тропа лежит средь зла и слёз,
Дальнейший путь не ясен, пусть,
Но всё же трудностей и бед
Я, как и прежде, не боюсь.

Не важно, что врата узки,
Меня опасность не страшит.
Я — властелин своей судьбы,
Я — капитан своей души.

William Ernest Henley - «Invictus»



August 16, 2017

Я люблю тех, кто не умеет жить иначе, как чтобы погибнуть, ибо идут они по мосту.

https://tsargrad.tv/articles/aleksandr-dugin-transgumanizm-djavolskaja-zateja-smertnyj-prigovor-chelovechestvu_25615

В основе трансгуманизма, который выступает в форме научной, лежит движение New Age, буквально «новая эра». Это чисто оккультное сатанинское движение, которое действительно воспевает Люцифера и которое воспроизводит древнюю гностическую концепцию. То есть постулируется закабаление человека в материю плотью в силу того, что тот, кто его создавал (субстанция, которую они называют Демиургом), по ошибке создал это существо. И смысл человеческой жизни – спастись от этой материи, освободиться, вернуться в некий духовный свет, а несёт этот свет как раз Люцифер (что, собственно, и значит «несущий свет»). Что интересно, один из ведущих трансгуманистов, который сегодня возглавляет одну из ключевых криологических фирм «Алькор» – это Макс Мор, который тоже действовал под видом философа и учёного. В одной из работ, которая была напечатана в журнале трансгуманистов, где он говорит о том, в чём смысл нашей деятельности – как раз излагается эта гностическая концепция. Причём называется статья «Во славу дьявола». И дальше он описывает это классическое видение, что злой Демиург создал человека, лишил его знаний, лишил его света. Люцифер приходит в виде библейского змия, а потом в виде других образов, сообщает человеку это знание. И дальше Мор говорит: мне главное было показать, насколько фундаментально система ценностей в трансгуманизме расходится с ценностями, мировоззрением христианской традиции, которую Мор называет иррациональной религиозной догмой.

http://zavtra.ru/word_of_day/bogoubijstvo_2017-01-16



July 23, 2017

Вот проносящийся ангел трубит,
С треском звезда к нам на землю летит,
Землю прошибла до бездны глухой,
Вырвался дым, как из печи большой.
Медными крыльями грозно стуча,
Вышла из дыма с коня саранча.



June 18, 2017

Lots of nether creatures don't seem to know what to do with themselves after they turn up here. The blank-faced things you can find under churches, for example, don't even seem willing to defend themselves.



June 7, 2017

Sites of interest of urban asian photography.

http://mokzo.tumblr.com/archive
http://reconciliation-with-dog.tumblr.com/archive
http://uchihar.tumblr.com/archive



June 3, 2017

Картины не обязаны быть красивыми.

Трёхлетний Сэм сосредотачивается и заканчивает рисунок. «О, какая красивая картинка!» — восклицает его мама. Сэм уходит. «Мне надоело», — говорит он. Двухлетняя Клара рисует губкой. Отец направляет её, пытаясь сделать так, чтобы вышло красиво. «Может, добавить ещё немного красного? Это будет здорово. И синий ты ещё не использовала. Давай вот здесь».

В этом возрасте дети любят экспериментировать с цветом. Они могут нарисовать композицию, которая кажется вам красивой, а через минуту превратить её в серую мазню. Пускай. Для маленьких детей искусство не имеет отношения к красоте. С его помощью они исследуют мир и выражают себя. Более того, детей почти никогда не интересует результат. Искусство — это действие.

Это процесс, а не продукт. Для маленьких детей искусство — это действие.

Когда ребёнок упорно трудится над рисунком, нам очень хочется сказать: «Какая чудесная картинка! Как красиво!» — и повесить рисунок на холодильник. Но, прежде чем произнести: «Как красиво!» — подумайте о том, что может значить искусство для ребёнка. Не все детские произведения красивы. Некоторые представляют собой невразумительную коричневатую мазню. Иногда это каракули или кляксы. Возможно, ребёнок пытается нарисовать нечто страшное, а вовсе не красивое. Даже такой вопрос, как: «Что это?» — может поставить в тупик юного художника. Этот вопрос предполагает, что рисунок должен что-то изображать. Главное не то, как выглядит творение вашего ребёнка, а то, что оно значит для него.

В три года мой сын Майлз любил экспериментировать, смешивая краски для рисования. Но чем больше красок он смешивал, тем больше результат приобретал бурый оттенок. Иногда на бумаге появлялась дыра. На вопрос, что тут нарисовано, ответа у него не было. Но если вы спрашивали: «Как ты это сделал?» — он с удовольствием описывал подробности сложного процесса.

Многим маленьким детям безразлично, что будет с законченным рисунком. Его можно повесить на холодильник, только не стоит забывать, что вы делаете это для себя, а не для ребёнка.

Помогите детям наслаждаться процессом и творчеством, а не хвалите результат. Вот чему они могут научиться:
* Искусство позволяет мне экспериментировать и выражать свои чувства. Это приятно.
* Я не обязан делать то же, что и остальные.
* Я могу рисковать и пробовать новое.
* Я верю в свои идеи и возможности.
* Я могу быстро соображать.
* Взрослым интересно, и они спрашивают о моих картинах. Я знаю, что отвечать, потому что сам это нарисовал.

Творчество не ограничивается искусством. Творческие люди отличаются быстротой мышления, стремлением к новому, не боятся задавать вопросы. В том, что касается «художественного творчества», детей нужно поощрять к исследованию и риску. Фредель Мейнард, автор книги «Как научить ребёнка творчеству» (Guiding Your Child to a More Creative Life), говорит, что самые маленькие дети начинают с веры в свои идеи, но затем ограничивают своё воображение из-за критики. Очень часто страх совершить ошибку, неодобрение и обидные слова могут убить интерес ребёнка к риску, эксперименту и в конечном итоге к учебе. Дженет Стокер, одна из основательниц Школы для маленьких детей, убеждена, что огромное значение имеет реакция взрослых на усилия ребёнка и что поделки могут вредить творчеству. Когда дети изготавливают поделки, они создают определённый объект. Стокер считает, что гораздо полезнее свободно экспериментировать с материалами. С ней согласна педагог Бев Бос: поделки могут быть увлекательным занятием, особенно в преддверии праздника, но их не следует путать с искусством.

Художественное творчество начинается тогда, когда ребёнок самостоятельно использует средства выражения, а роль взрослого сводится к тому, чтобы предоставить материалы. Маленькие дети не видят разницы между искусством и наукой. Каждый новый цвет или материал — это повод для нового эксперимента. Детям необходимо прикасаться ко всему, сжимать в руках, а иногда и пробовать на вкус. Некоторые искусствоведы утверждают, что всем детям нужна возможность изучать материалы для изобразительного искусства, играть с ними, и только потом они начнут выражать свои идеи с помощью искусства. Например, в детских садах города Реджо-Эмилия дети в возрасте двух-трёх лет играют с глиной и красками. Когда маленьким детям предоставляют достаточно времени для знакомства с красками и другими материалами, они используют эти средства для выражения своих идей.

Дети — не взрослые. Возможно, беспорядочная мазня вашего ребёнка — это способ исследования цвета и фактуры. Предоставьте ребёнку самостоятельность и не сосредотачивайтесь на результате. Не исключено, что он не важен. Маленьких детей часто увлекает сам процесс, и им всё равно, что будет с их рисунком, когда они закончат. Искусство — это действие.

Поделки и творчество. Когда Мэдисон вернулась домой, мама спросила её, создала ли она какое-нибудь произведение искусства, — в детском саду проводили День искусств. «Ну, — ответила Мэдисон, — воспитательница сказала, что это искусство». «А что это было?» — спросила мать. «Не знаю, — сказала девочка. — Но не искусство». После обсуждения пятилетняя Мэдисон сформулировала следующее определение: «Искусство — это когда ты сам решаешь, что хочешь сделать, и делаешь это так, как ты хочешь».

Группа Мэдисон изготавливала поделки.

Поделки — это очень интересно, но относиться к ним нужно как к структурированной игре, наподобие «Карамельного замка». Дома можно время от времени играть в настольные игры и изготавливать поделки, но нужно видеть разницу. Поделки не искусство, и они должны составлять лишь небольшую долю опыта обращения с материалами для художественного творчества. Настоящее искусство, как и свободная игра, предполагает эксперимент и творчество. Творческий порыв идет изнутри, и к нему невозможно принудить.

Почему мы хотим, чтобы дети часто занимались поделками? Прежде всего многим взрослым нравятся поделки и совместные занятия с детьми. Ими хорошо заниматься в выходные. А поскольку поделки обычно выглядят лучше, чем большинство результатов детского творчества, велико искушение использовать их в качестве, например, сделанного собственными руками подарка на бабушкин день рождения. Кроме того, поделки — великолепный способ занять ребёнка. Все это веские причины. И всё же не стоит уделять слишком много времени поделкам. Обычно их целью является конечный продукт: радуга, дерево или снеговик. Для маленьких детей важнее сам процесс — рисовать, клеить, раскрашивать.

Если вам самим нравятся поделки и вы хотите повеселиться вместе с ребёнком, обязательно оставьте место для новых идей. Постарайтесь не предлагать образец для подражания. И если ваш трёхлетний ребёнок начнёт делать что-то по-своему, позвольте ему экспериментировать. Не настаивайте на первоначальном плане. Например, если вы хотите изготовить к празднику гирлянду из цветной бумаги, приготовьте бумагу и клей. Но если ваш малыш предпочитает склеивать полоски бумаги по-своему, не мешайте ему. Гирлянду потом можно сделать и самому.

Дома экспериментировать легче, чем в детском саду. При групповых занятиях социальное давление слишком велико. Воспитательница показывает образец, и дети должны строго следовать ему, чтобы получился точно такой же готовый продукт.

«Дети, сегодня мы будем делать клоуна. Все получат лист бумаги, два круглых глаза, квадратный нос и большой треугольник для шляпы…» В коридорах детских садов и развивающих центров можно увидеть результаты одинаковых проектов. Демонстрируется образец, и дети воспроизводят его.

Представьте, что вы пытаетесь скопировать картину Ренуара. И каков результат? Совсем не похоже. Копирование образца может отвратить ребёнка от искусства. Когда пальчики четырёхлетнего малыша пытаются повторить то, что сделал взрослый, всё часто заканчивается пролитой краской. Линии получаются кривыми, нос у фигуры съезжает набок.
Поделки и образцы часто удовлетворяют потребности взрослых, а не детей. Взрослые навязывают идеи вместо того, чтобы поощрять фантазию ребёнка.

Брендон не желал делать такого же клоуна, как все. Когда воспитатель раздал бумагу и клей, он спрятался под стул. Воспитатель заставил его вылезти и присоединиться к остальным. Четырёхлетняя Хейди с радостью взялась за изготовление клоуна, но не желала копировать образец. Она добавила волосы под клоунский колпак, но сделала это тайком, чтобы не видел воспитатель.

Какой же опыт получили Брендон и Хейди?

– Искусство бывает правильным и неправильным.
– Образец, который предлагается — это идеал. У меня не получится такой же.
– Нужно делать то же, что и все.
– Мои идеи не имеют значения.

Эта мысль лучше всего выражена в песне Гарри Чейпина «Цветы красные» (Flowers Are Red). В ней рассказывается о маленьком мальчике с богатым воображением. В школе учительница говорит ему, что цветы красные, а листья зелёные. Все должны рисовать так, как показала учительница. Маленький мальчик протестует: «Есть так много цветов у радуги, так много цветов у солнца на заре, так много цветов в цветах, и я вижу их все!» Когда же другая учительница признает его право на творчество, уже слишком поздно. Малыш всегда рисует цветы красными, повторяя: «Цветы красные, а зелёные листья зелёные…». Образцы навязывают определённую идею и создают ожидание совершенства. А вот пример, как трёхлетний ребёнок стал делать всё по-своему. Кейси начала раскрашивать матерчатые сумки вместе с другими детьми. Через какое-то время она отложила кисточку и окунула пальцы в краску. Сначала Кейси рисовала кончиками пальцев, потом ладонями; потом в ход пошли руки, до самого локтя. Краска смывалась водой, и девочка получила огромное удовольствие от своих экспериментов.

Разрешать страшные сюжеты. Мой папа в пятилетнем возрасте рисовал самолёты, которые сбрасывают бомбы. Это было в 1940-х гг., во время Второй мировой войны. Ему не давали покоя бомбы и самолёты. Но даже в мирное время многих детей волнуют и привлекают взрывы, автомобильные аварии и другие катастрофы. И дети их рисуют. У них на уме злодеи и бомбы.

Возможно, вас расстраивает насилие в рисунках ребёнка. Однако очень важно обеспечить ему свободу выражения через изобразительное искусство. Точно так же мы позволяем ему выражать себя, выбирая темы для ролевых игр. Искусство — это ещё один способ выражения идей и эмоций. Лучше, чтобы ребёнок выразил свои мысли, а не держал их в себе. Если малыш что-то рисует, значит, ему нужно это понять. Его это волнует.

Творчество — это решение проблем, риск и экспериментирование. Пусть ребёнок немного помучается. Если малыш говорит: «У меня не получается дом. Нарисуй мне», можно ответить так: «Я помогу, но ты должен сделать это сам». Помощь может заключаться в том, что вы будете стоять рядом и поддерживать его морально. «Если я нарисую дом, это будет мой дом. А как выглядит твой?»

Родители иногда торопятся разрешать проблемы и даже поправлять детей. Если ребёнок всё рисует в одном углу бумажного листа, в этом нет ничего страшного. Не нужно ничего подсказывать. Если ребёнок изрисовал весь лист, можно отметить: «Вижу, у тебя закончилось свободное место». Или подскажите: «Если тебе нужна ещё бумага, она на столе», а не подавайте чистый лист. Возможно, цель ребёнка — накладывать все краски слоями, один на другой.

Прежде чем похвалить: «Какая замечательная птичка!» или «Красивые горы», выясните, что имел в виду ребёнок. Возможно, это вовсе не птичка и не гора. На произведение ребёнка нужно реагировать констатацией и вопросами: «Ты не хочешь рассказать мне о картине?» И приготовьтесь услышать отказ.

Когда вы не ограничиваете фантазию малыша и предлагаете ему рассказать о том, что для него важно, когда-нибудь он попытается с помощью искусства выразить свои сокровенные чувства и мысли. Не ограничивайте фантазию в искусстве. Предоставьте материалы и выделите место — пусть ребёнок творит. Дети могут экспериментировать с фактурой или цветом, но не интересоваться конечным результатом. Они часто «расширяют» идею и направляют процесс в другую сторону.

Уважайте детскую фантазию. Вы можете предложить рисовать брызгами — набрызгивать краску вокруг какого-то объекта, например кленового листа. Если дочь собирает другие листья, палочки и кору, значит, девочку увлекла эта идея и она расширяет её. Возможно, потом она начнёт выдувать краску через соломинку или макать листья в краску. Как бы то ни было, вы всегда вправе ограничить фантазию юного художника, если она угрожает людям или собственности.

Полезные фразы:
* Хочешь что-нибудь рассказать о своей картине?
* Как ты это сделал?
* Ты использовал много красной краски.
* Ты долго трудился над этой картиной.
* Было трудно склеить эти коробочки. У тебя получилось.
* Я вижу, у тебя на листе больше нет свободного места.
* Если тебе нужна ещё бумага, она на столе.
* Я тебе помогу, но не буду этого делать за тебя.
* Если я нарисую, это будет мой домик. А как выглядит твой?
* Что ты теперь будешь делать со своим рисунком?

Фразы, от которых лучше воздержаться:
* Какая красивая картина!
* Что это?
* Какая милая у тебя получилась собачка.
* Ладно, вот тебе домик.
* Тебе нужна ещё бумага. Вот чистый лист.
* Нет, так не годится. Ты не должен рисовать такое.
* Отлично! Ты очень хорошо рисуешь!

Образцы, одинаковые работы и стандартные поделки — всё это можно увидеть в детских садах и развивающих центрах. По возможности выбирайте программу, поощряющую творчество. Это легко понять, посетив детский сад. Просто пройдитесь по коридорам и посмотрите, сколько одинаковых картинок висит на стенах. Если в дошкольном учреждении предпочитают поделки, можно уравновесить этот подход, предоставив возможности для свободного творчества дома.

Хизер Шумейкер "Не делиться — это нормально!"



May 26, 2017

https://www.timfranco.com/



May 2, 2017

"If it is natural to die then the hell with nature. Why submit to its tyranny? We must rise above nature. We must refuse to die." — FM-2030



February 18, 2017

We watch the sky go crimson red, we watch our children wake up dead.

Tactical Sekt - Damage Limitation



February 16, 2017

Malfunctioning bionics are fun.



January 8, 2017

Ты – не сегодня, и ты – не завтра. Ты – это тысяча лет до тебя, и тысяча лет после тебя.
За тысячу лет до тебя твоя кровь охранялась, чтобы ты стал таким, какой ты есть.
Храни свою кровь так, чтобы спустя тысячу лет после тебя наследники знали, за что благодарить тебя.

Вульф Соренсен (Генрих Гиммлер) — Голос Предков

Не согласен. Звучит здорово, но я отталкиваюсь даже не от пары поколений, а от конкретного индивида. Тупикова, безнадёжно несчастна твоя ветвь или нет определяешь ты сегодня, и ты — завтра.



January 4, 2017

Now you will know why you fear the night.



December 17, 2016

когда ушли, наконец, все, кого любил
когда покончено, наконец, со всем, чего хотел
когда все кошмары вдруг помрачил
сияющий безумный маяк
или слепящее затмение уродливых форм мира сего
когда ты спокоен и весел
и, наконец, совершенно один
тогда, в новой великой тьме
ты исполнишь свой замысел

замысел нужен каждому – сказал, отвернувшись к теням, тот
кто, я думал, спал или умер
представь себе – сказал он – изъеденную плоть
зубы рвут
язык пробует
а голод алчет ее вкуса
теперь возьми плоть – он сказал
забери зубы и язык
вкус и голод
бери как есть
таков мой замысел

мой личный замысел о мире сем
я слушал эти слова и не думал о том,
исполнит ли существо, которое, казалось мне, спит или умерло, свою мечту
даже в самом глубоком сне
или в самой долгой смерти
потому что я слышал – такие замыслы, мечты
и я знал, им не хватает проницательности
ибо замысел должен
идти за пределы языка и зубов, и голода и плоти
за пределы костей и праха костей и ветра, что уносит прах
так я представил себе тьму, что была прежде ночной темноты
и странно сияющий свет
что не имел ничего общего со светом дня

тот день будет словно похож на другие
снова по телу бегут мурашки
снова нас держит великий давящий страх
но после – других дней не будет
больше не будет подобных миров
ибо у меня есть замысел
совершенно особенный замысел
больше не будет таких миров
больше не будет таких дней

есть лишь четыре способа умереть – возможно сказал мне сардонический дух
есть смерть, которая приходит довольно неожиданно
есть смерть, которая приходит довольно постепенно
есть смерть, которая приходит довольно безболезненно
есть смерть, которая несет боль
и сочетаться они могут различным образом
неожиданная и постепенная
безболезненная и полная боли
поддаться можно лишь четырем способам смерти
а других нет
даже когда голос стих
я ждал, когда он вновь заговорит
часы, дни и годы шли
я ждал продолжения
но слышал лишь слабое эхо, напоминающее:
других нет
других нет
тогда ли я начал вынашивать
свой замысел?

нет способа сбежать из мира сего
он проникает даже в твой сон
он – сама его суть
ты попался в свой сон
где нет пространства
вечный ад, где нет времени
ты не можешь сделать ничего, кроме того, что обязан
нет надежды сбежать из сна
который никогда не был твоим
и слова, которые ты говоришь, всего лишь его слова
ты говоришь, как предатель
под нескончаемой пыткой

многие покушаются на мир сей
и грезят о диких, колоссальных переменах
я слышал, как они говорят во сне
об изящных мутациях
хитроумном уничтожении
я слышал, как они шепчут по углам подкошенных домов
на аллеях и узких улочках сей кривой и скрипящей вселенной
которую они в мечтах выправили, сделав здоровой и звонкой
но каждый их свежий и непродуманный замысел
сломан в самом сердце своем
ибо они думают, что мир сей – единственный подлинный
а не всего лишь один из многих иных
чьи кошмары случились прежде
словно чудовищный сад, что разросся из одного семени
я слышал, как эти мечтатели говорят во сне
я стоял и ждал их
словно бы наверху темной лестницы
они ничего не знают обо мне
и не ведают ни одной тайны моего замысла
а я слышу каждый скрип их шагов

то был голос того, кто ждал в тени
того, кто смотрел на луну и ждал, пока я сверну за угол
на узкую улицу
и встану рядом, в тусклой лунной глазури
и вот он сказал
прошептал
что мой замысел непродуман
мой замысел о мире сем – чудовищная ошибка
ибо – сказал он – нечего делать и некуда идти
нечем быть и некого знать
твой замысел – ошибка, повторил он
этот мир – ошибка, ответил я

за ним всегда бежали дети
завидев, как он идет вприпрыжку
смешная походка
смешной человек
смешной смешной смешной человек
порой он их смешил
он их смешил, о да – смешил
смешил смешил смешил смешил
они катались со смеху
однажды он отвел их
в особое место, которое знал
и рассказал о мире сем
о смешном смешном смешном мире
что их порой смешил
он их смешил, о да – смешил
смешил смешил смешил смешил
они катались со смеху
затем смешной человек, который их смешил
порой смешил
открыл им свой замысел
совсем особый смешной замысел
зная, что они поймут
и рассмеются порой
он их смешил
о да, смешил
смешил смешил смешил смешил
глаза их округлились
они катались со смеху

впервые я услышал обо всем от безумца
в тихой темной комнате, пахнувшей изношенным временем и пространством
других людей нет
их нет совсем
феномен человека – всего лишь сумма плотно cвернутых слоев иллюзии
каждый из которых наматывает себя на большее безумие
но можно встретить кого угодно
если вокруг лишь безумные зеркала
они, красуясь, кричат и хохочут
в бесконечном вопле
но когда я спросил безумца – что это?
оно отразилось внутри зеркал
бесконечно идущих сквозь изношенное время и пространство
он лишь смотрел и улыбался
потом засмеялся и закричал
в его пустых черных глазах
я на миг поймал отражение
формы – тень божества
летящую прочь от своей изношенной бесконечной сути
от времени, места и всего самого худшего
от грез этого мира
мой особый замысел ради смеха
и криков

мы пошли на представление
в старом сарае
за окраиной города
и поначалу все шло хорошо
крохотная сцена с занавесом светилась в темноте
и куклы плясали на нитках
поначалу все шло хорошо
но вдруг все едва заметно переменилось, что почувствовали лишь немногие
и я был один из тех
кто тихо ушел
нет, я не ушел
потому что видел, к чему все идет
гримасы кукол становились страннее
и тонкие нити натягивались
мелкими движеньями мелких рук
публика вокруг пришла в ужас
повернулась и бежала с представления
в старом сарае
за окраиной города
но я хотел стать свидетелем того, чего не может быть
хотел видеть то, что нельзя увидеть
но в момент свершающейся катастрофы
мои куклы обратили лица к кукловоду

были сумерки, и я стоял в серой мгле в большом пустом здании
тишину усугублял гулкий голос
все вещи мира сего – говорил он
происходят из одной сути
для которой нет слов
это большая часть, у которой нет ни начала, ни конца
и единая суть этого мира, для которой не может быть слов
и есть все вещи мира сего
это меньшая часть, у которой есть начало и будет конец
и для которой есть слова, созданные лишь, чтобы их говорить
это мелкие поломанные существа мира сего – он сказал
начала и концы мира сего – он сказал
и для которых есть слова, созданные лишь, чтобы их говорить
забери эти слова – что останется, спросил он меня
я стоял в сумерках в большом пустом здании
и не отвечал
вопрос возвращался эхом снова и вновь
но я молчал, пока эхо не стихло
и когда сумерки стали вечером, я почувствовал
что мой особый замысел, для которого нет слов
движется навстречу большей тьме

есть те, у кого нет голосов
или те, кто никогда не заговорят
по причине вещей, которые они знают о мире сем
и вещей, которые они чувствуют к этому миру
ибо мысли, что наполняют мозг
поврежденный мозг
потому что боль, что наполняет тело
поврежденное тело
существуют в других мирах
бесчисленных иных мирах
каждый который стоит одиноко в бесконечной пустой черноте
для которой не создано слов
и где нет голосов, способных говорить
когда мозг полнится лишь поврежденными мыслями
когда пораженное тело полнится только болью
и стоит одиноко в мире, окруженном бесконечной пустой чернотой
существует в мире, о котором нет особого замысла

когда ушли, наконец, все, кого любил
когда покончено, наконец, со всем, чего хотел
когда все кошмары вдруг помрачил
сияющий безумный маяк
или слепящее затмение уродливых форм мира сего
когда ты спокоен и весел
и, наконец, совершенно один
тогда, в новой великой тьме
ты исполнишь свой замысел

Томас Лиготти — У меня есть особый замысел о мире сем



December 14, 2016

Небо мучалось родами, земля мучалась родами,
И лиловое море рожало.
Кроваво-красная водоросль в муках рождения.
Полый стебель водоросли испускал дым,
Полый стебель водоросли испускал пламя,
И из пламени возник мальчик.
Огонь вместо волос, огонь вместо бороды,
А глаза его были солнцами.

Песнь армянских язычников о рождении Ваагна.



December 5, 2016

Я помню, как однажды, глядя на меня остекленевшими глазами, матушка сказала: «Когда услышишь, лежа в постели, лай псов поблизости, накройся поплотнее одеялом и не смейся над их безумьем, ибо ими владеет неизбывная тоска по вечности, тоска, которой томимы все: и ты, и я, и все унылые и худосочные жители земли. Но это зрелище возвышает душу, и я позволяю тебе смотреть из окна». Я свято чту завет покойной матери. Меня, как этих псов, томит тоска по вечности… тоска, которой никогда не утолить! Если верить тому, что мне говорили, я – сын мужчины и женщины. Странно… Мне казалось, я не столь низкого происхождения. А впрочем, какая разница?

Лотреамон — Песни Мальдорора



December 3, 2016

2012, в Украине не раскрыто каждое четвертое умышленное убийство.
2016, в Киеве не раскрыто каждое шестое убийство.


Да, это призыв к действию. Если ты ждал знака, то вот он!



December 3, 2016

Я упивался дивным зрелищем: предсмертной агонией своих сородичей. Жадно следил, стараясь ничего не упустить. То хриплые вопли обезумевшей старухи, то визг грудного младенца вдруг выбьются из хора, заглушая даже последние вылетающие из капитанского рупора истошные команды. И хоть корабль был слишком далеко, чтобы за грохотом бури и воем ветра расслышать каждый голос, но силой своего воображенья, словно неким слуховым биноклем, я приближал его к себе. Когда же, с промежутками в четверть часа, налетал с гулким ревом сокрушительный шквал и вконец перепуганные буревестники разрывались от крика, и трещала по всей длине корабельная обшивка, и становились громче стенания несчастных, которых жребий предназначил в жертву смерти, слушал и вонзал себе в щеку иглу, чтобы было с чем сравнить их боль, и думал с затаенной радостью: "Они страдают во сто крат сильнее!" Я посылал им громкие проклятья, сулил им гибель, и мне казалось, что они должны, должны услышать! Я верил, что для ненависти не существовало ни расстоянья, ни акустических законов, верил, что мои слова дошли до слуха терпящих крушение и явственно звучат у них в ушах, хотя и приглушенные рокотом разгневанного океана.

Лотреамон — Песни Мальдорора



December 3, 2016

Power belongs to the people that take it. Nothing to do with their hard work, strong ambitions, or rightful qualifications, no. The actual will to take is often the only thing that’s necessary.

Tyrell Wellick